Under The Rug -Dirt Blast from the Past-
by The Guy on the Couch
Just to let you know, this may seem quite scrambled when you start reading but if you have ever seen a Quinton Tarentino or Guy Ritchie film you'll understand this pretty easily... hopefully anyway. This first chapter isn't the most action packed or riveting but it's the boring crap that help gives meaning to the interesting stuff. Trust me on this and if you don't trust me just read on.
Disclaimer: Gainax owns Eva and you all know that, as do I. In the words of the world's most famous retard wigger/comedian, Ali G "Aiight, nuff said init?".
Chapter 1 - Whatever happened to my Rock 'n' Roll?
A cool breeze whipped across the car park of a bleak, concrete sided building. The sun had just fallen and the night gave way to a cool, pleasing change especially after the scorch of the day.
"Damn wind..." a figure muttered as he tried to find a place against the wall that wasn't drafty enough to blow out the flame on his lighter.
**Chk Chk...Chk**
"There we go." the figure said happily as his rolled cigarette burned gently.
Foot steps approached from around the corner of the building and headed towards the smoking figure.
"Heylo Ikari, What's happening man?" The smoker said with a flicking salute to the brim of his hat.
"Not much really Sirhc, not much at all..." said Gendo assuringly.
"Oh aye.." replied Sirhc as he took large drags of his rolly and held them.
Gendo looked at the rolled smoke and then at the owner.
"Are you smoking up?" He asked inquisitively. There was silence for a few seconds as Sirhc looked up from his spliff and stared at Gendo replying with a very serious, "Yes."
"Baka... you stoners seem to be everywhere these days waisting your money and mind."
"Oh well, what do you expect the way rock 'n' roll's old attitudes are coming back again. But really it's those rap industry icons that are getting kids into, slash, onto hooter plus e's and speed and chemical filth like that."
Gendo smirked at the hypocracy of the statement and reached into his jacket.
"Well to business now I think." he said as he pulled out some folded up paper and handed it to the toking chimney. "What's this? Insurance forms? Cause if it is..." As he began to sound like a rambling drunk Gendo cut straight back in so as not to let him rant.
"Its something that can be very useful to me and if you think about it you'll realise useful to you as well. Not insurance but investment." Gendo said seriously. The teenager morning stoner looked intensely at the documents before saying, "Yeah... I'll think about, I'll just sleep on it for now dude... You are serious about this aren't you?" Sirhc replied slightly disorientated.
"I never joke around about business, never." he said solemnly in return.
"OK... I'll get back to you soon... catch ya on..." he said as he wandered off into night, and most likely a stoner bashing. Gendo watched him leave then looked around and disappeared himself.
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"16 years old... 5 and a half feet tall... light brown, blond hair... blue eyes... Uses substances... Went to public school... Good marks.. considering what he does that is... plays bass guitar... no records or convictions..."
"Talks crap every chance he gets..." mimicked Gendo as he interrupted.
"I'm not surprised," said a man in a suit. "And you want to use this...this, liability as a test subject?" said the suit objectionably.
"Why not?" said Ikari reasurringly. "He's perfect, his mind's already half mush to make him easier to work with plus he's expendable, quite easily at that too."
"Hmm... fine. If you run into trouble passing him, come straight to me, I'll back you one hundred percent if need be." the suit said reasurringly.
"Exellent, then all I have to do is wait for him to say yes and if he doesn't, he'll end up wanting to anyway."
"Then we wait for now... Oh yes, and you know better than anyone that security is paramount Ikari...I don't want any misfortunate accidents with regard to lapse in security off ALL forms." the suit emphasised.
"Trust me, this boy is gullible. And he believes whatever I tell him too." Ikari smirked.
"Anything to help, keep me posted on this." the suit said as he left Ikari's office.
"Man... this shit is heavy, maybe I shouldn't... Ahhhh! Screw it! Just think of the cash..." Sirhc muttered to himself as he dialed Ikari's number. The phone rang about 8 times before he heard the familiar voice answer the phone. "Hello Sirhc, I hope you have good news for me." he said expectantly.
"I do actually hey, this would be a good opportunity to get back on top of things so I've signed your forms and agreed totally." Sirhc replied half shakily.
"That's good to hear indeed, we'd like you to come in as soon as you can."
"Yeah no problem 'ey, I'd just like to ask a few questions before we start anything though."said Sirhc apprehensively.
"Come in when you can and I'll be able to easily help you."
"K... see you soon then." and with that they hung up.
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"I fell in love with the sweet sensation, I gave my heart to a simple cause, I gave my soul to a new religion... Whatever happened to you? Rock 'n' Roll... Whatever happened to my Rock 'n' Roll!" Sirhc jived as he walked along the foot path beside a large non-descript building. He then pulled out a notepad and checked the address he was supposed to go to, then reached into his jacket making sure the forms were still on him. He took a deep breath and looked straight at the doors that were approaching on the side on of the building and without a seconds thought he walked in and went straight to front desk and asked for a Mr. Ikari before quietly telling the secretary that he was here in regards to the employment opening in the research division. The secretary raised her head immediately when hearing 'research division' mentioned and buzzed the teen through to an elevator which simply went up the floors without him having to push a button. The elevator reached the fortieth floor, the top floor as the light on the button panel indicated but the elevator didn't stop, instead it kept going to the stoner's amazement who simply brushed it off as some sort of auditory and visual illusion that comes with a constant lack of reality. The doors opened to another secretary who asked him to go left then right and knock on the door labeled director of human resources.
"I've never liked the term human resources..." he thought to himself warily as pictures of Catbert the Evil Director of Human Resources came to mind.
The door was easy enough to find though at least which was a big relief for him, as getting lost in the simplest of situations was a natural occurrence for him. He knocked three times and waited. The door opened for him with a de-latching sound and Ikari greeted him.
"Welcome to the building." Ikari smirked as he gestured towards a chair.
"Yeah, good to see you." Sirhc replied weakly. "I was wondering does this entail actual cryogenics as the forms say or is it something else by chance?"
"Yes, you will be cryogenically frozen for periods, its painless don't worry." he said bluntly but reassuringly.
"...uh...good... OK... umm, how will I receive my payment?" he asked slowly.
"You'll receive all your money in your bank account at the end of each week. Anything else?"
"Uhh yeah, where's your gents 'cause i don't want to get caught of guard and need to go and not know where the john is. I get lost easy too.." he said in a mock tone of shame.
Ikari gave a slight grunt of amusement and said, "Don't worry there's one on every floor and they're each in the same place on every level."
Sirhc looked at Ikari then the floor and paused for second before reaching into his jacket for the signed forms. He handed them over to Ikari who checked them then gave a small smile and filed them away in his cabinet. "Now to begin, follow me." Ikari gestured.
Ikari led him back into the elevator and down to the research 'level' which Sirhc thought more to be sub sub sub basement Delta. "Now as the contract said this research is the last stage of detecting and preventing all our 'incurable' diseases such as cancer and aids and what have you. I'm not gonna lie and say that your more than a human guinea pig because that is all you are, but and I mean but, you are going to make or break this project, your part is crucial and don't forget that."
As a pair of researchers led Sirhc off to be prepared and be briefed a woman approached Gendo and quietly said to him "Detecting and preventing cancer, that's very rich Gendo."
"Now Yui you know we can't have just anybody in on this." he said complacently. "And believe me, we don't want him in on this."
"Your right... did he sign without trouble?" Yui asked to change the subject.
"Wave enough money in their face and you get what you want, all the time." he said casually.
"Hmm..." she contemplated quietly. "Shinji misses you, you should take a day off and spend it at home." Yui quietly persuaded.
"Things are only getting more intense, but I'll try... OK?"
"He's 7 months old and you've barely had time sleep let alone come home, you haven't seen him that much, just a day or two, for his sake.."
"OK OK... I'll make sure I can get some time off." he replied.
"Thanks dear, I'll get back to work now, see you soon." said Yui as she waved and walked off.
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Idiot's Notes: Yeah I know that it seems a bit laborious to start off with but the next chapter is where it kicks in. This is more of a prelude to set the scene and make you think a bit. Plus I'm not a prick, I made sure second chapter was done before I even considered posting the first so at least you won't have wasted time reading the boring crap and get no reward for doing so. I know what irritates readers and basically whatever irritates me, I'm sure irritates everyone else.
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Thanks anyone who reads this, I appreciate you taking the time.