CHAPTER FOUR

***Now What?

(Sendoh's POV)

          After walking Rukawa home, I headed back to my place, still holding the box of tissue. Stupid Kaede, I thought. If you only knew…  I sighed and stared at the box, Rukawa was too stubborn to accept help. I practically begged him just to allow me to help. I offered him the tissue about more than six times, and he only took one, and it was only so I'd leave him alone. Which of course, I didn't do.

          I didn't even realize what a fool I had just made out of my self. But it doesn't matter; all that matters now is that I'll know he'll be fine. Probably, he's wondering why I knew where he was, why I knew he was crying, why I insisted of helping and probably a lot more questions. Which is why I have to make up a huge convincing story if ever he'll ask. If ever he'll bother to ask.

          I let myself in my house. I turned on the light and the TV and slumped down on the couch. I sighed, dropping the tissue box on the floor. Now what? I asked myself. Think Akira! Think! I urged myself. You better come up with an excuse now or risk all the remaining time of your life inside the garbage can.

          I bit my fingernails, trying hard to think. I removed my jacket and placed them on the arm of the couch. There were still the tearstains Rukawa had left. I couldn't help but smile. Not because I liked it when he cries, boy, if he cries I feel like I've been stabbed right on the heart. It's because I remembered the way he entrusted me with his feelings, the way he held me tight, the way he let me see through him. In short, the way he needed me.

          I know he wasn't aware of that, but that's enough for me. I hope I had helped ease the pain he felt at that moment. I know how hard it was for him… If only I could take all his pain away and let myself suffer instead, I would. That's how much I care for him.

          Shut up with those thoughts already and focus on the excuse you ought to make! I scolded myself mentally. Really, it won't be long and you'll find me as one of the patients in the Mental Hospital. But it's true, I really need to make a good excuse, or else Rukawa would start to avoid me, or worse be remembered by him as a total loser. And I don't ever want that to happen.

          I like us the way we are, rivals, at least I have a place in his life, even if it's just a tiny bit. But wouldn't it be better if we'll be able to get a bit closer? Friends perhaps? Or maybe… something more. Don't be ridiculous. That will never happen. I told myself sadly. I sighed. Right now, what I really need is an excuse, if I want things to remain as they are.

          I decided to get some help. And of course that help would come from my one and only best friend, Koshino. I pounced on the cordless phone lying on the other end of the couch and hastily dialed Koshino's home number.

          "Hello?" a gruff voice answered. "Who the hell are you calling at this time of the night?"

          "It's me, Hiro-kun," I replied. "Akira."

          He yawned, or was it a groan? "What do you want?"

          "I need your advice," I told him. "It's about Rukawa… I saw him this afternoon heading towards the seashore, he looked as though he was about to cry so I dropped by the convenience store to buy a box of tissue."

          That wasn't exactly the whole truth, but close enough to the truth anyway. I didn't want to tell Koshino I followed Rukawa the whole afternoon and snooped with their conversation. Break-up, that is. He'd kill me.

          "You're not making any sense," Koshino replied. "Make it quick, will you? I need to sleep."

          "So anyway," I continued, ignoring the nasty comment. "I followed him to the seashore and as expected, there he was, crying… So I approached him and offered him the tissue."

          "So what does it have to do with me?" he asked.

          I rolled my eyes, if only I wasn't this desperate for help I won't even bother talking to my so-called best friend who's currently throwing me a fit of tantrum. "Look, I really need your help here," I told him. "Onegai? Just this once?"

          He sighed. "Fine," he said. "Just make the story quick already, I'm tired. I really need to sleep."

          "Anyway," I continued. "To cut the story short, I insisted upon helping him ease the pain he's having because of the break up he and Hanamichi had."

          "I don't see any problem about that," Koshino said lazily.

          Heck, this conversation won't lead to anything. "Whatever," I replied. "Never mind. You can go back to your slumber now, I see you won't do any help anyway."

          "Whatever," Koshino replied. " You can handle that problem, whatever that is."

          "I hope so," I said. "Bye."

          -TBC-

-.-.-.-.-.-.- Will Sendoh ever find a way to cover things up??? Read on the next chapter!!!

Author's Notes: Sorry if I take such a loooooong time to update and if every chapter's kindda short… I don't have much time to write these days, there's so much school works! Anyway, please review! Thanks!!!