~ Sightseeing in Middle-Earth ~
~ Quote: ~
"Give me a reason to kill you. Please?" - Major West, 'Lost in Space' (the movie) - to Doctor Smith
~ Disclaimer: ~
Erin's mine, the rest are not.
~ Chapter XVII~
~ The Battle of the Pelennor Fields ~
I fell asleep sometime during the night. I don't know when. But I know I had to have fallen asleep, since you can't wake up without first falling asleep. Whenever I fell asleep, I was woken later to the calls of fire in the city. Groggily, sore and stiff for sleeping in a sitting position, I pulled myself to my feet and stared down at the city, to see that the entire first ring of the city was in flame. Men, and the few women who had stayed, were scrambling with buckets, but they stumbled in weariness, and in despair, for the Nazgul had come in force. I'd missed the heads of those already slain being thrown over the wall, thankfully, but now, seeing the city in chaos and despair, I decided it was time for me to find whoever was in charge.
Entering the healing house from the gardens, I saw that more patients had sprung up out of the wood work. Hastily, I checked on Faramir, who was in just the same condition as before, and then rushed out. Outside, I glanced around. I remembered reading that Gandalf and Prince Imrahil walked around the city at about this time, and, hoping they were still doing so, I started off in a random direction. Amazingly, I hadn't gone very far before I came upon Gandalf, Prince Imrahil, Denethor, Boromir, Haldir and prince from Mirkwood walking along the street, deep in discussion. Pippin trailed along behind them, looking out of place, and he was the first to notice me as I approached them.
"Lady Erin!" he cried happily, and I smiled at the hobbit. The lords, princes and wizard looked up when Pippin said my name, and I half-bowed to them.
"Ah, Erin, it is good to see you." Gandalf said, motioning me to come closer, and Pippin's face fell slightly when he realized I'd be joining the group he was following as they talked, instead of walking and talking with him.
"We were just discussing the defense of the city, and we seem to be having a dispute over when the Rohirrim will come. Perhaps you could help us out?" Gandalf asked, and from the way he glanced at me, I knew he was not asking for an opinion, but knowledge of the future.
"I don't think I could be much help." I said dryly, and received a veiled glare from Gandalf. I grinned, then answered. "But I think the Rohirrim will come at dawn."
"So soon?" Denethor asked, surprised.
"Our most hopeful estimate was late afternoon." Prince Imrahil said skeptically.
"Nonetheless, I trust the Lady Erin's estimation, Prince Imrahil." Gandalf said gravely.
"As do I." Haldir put in. Imrahil paused, and then nodded. Boromir, Denethor and the Mirkwood prince accepted the estimation just as readily, with both Gandalf and Haldir backing it, and then they fell to discussing the defense of the city with the added might of the Rohirrim at dawn. Despite accepting the estimate, however, those that did not know that I came from a different world, Boromir included, seemed to be constantly glancing back at me, curiously or thoughtfully, as I walked beside Pippin. I pretended not to notice, however, as Pippin and I talked in low tones about various things. Then there came a loud boom from the gates, and the heads of the men in front of Pippin and I snapped up.
"By Eru, what was that?" Haldir asked, alarmed.
"The Witch King has come." I said with a sad smile. "Today to gates of Gondor break." The men glanced at me in alarm, and then set off at a run, in several different directions. Denethor and Legolas's brother, with Pippin following, went back to the Citadel, Imrahil headed off somewhere (presumably to his knights), Gandalf went off to find Shadowfax, which left Haldir, Boromir and I to dash down to the gate.
By the time I reached the gate, I was ahead of Boromir and Haldir, who slowed for each of the Witch King's cries, which affected them, but not me. As I stood back from the gate, waiting for Boromir and Haldir to catch up, the Lord of the Nazgul cried a third and last time. The ram struck again, just as Boromir and Haldir caught up with me, and the gates burst.
In rode the Lord of the Nazgul, looming up as a great black shape against the fires beyond the city walls, grown to a vast menace of despair. In he rode, under the archway that no enemy ever yet had passed, and the men of Gondor fled around me. Boromir and Haldir looked tempted to follow, indeed, they tried to convince me to come with them, but I stood firm in front of the Nazgul, just as Gandalf rode up on Shadowfax.
"You cannot enter here," said Gandalf, halting the Lord of the Nazgul in his steps. "Go back to the abyss prepared for you! Go back! Fall into the nothingness that awaits you and your Master. Go!" The Nazgul laughed, an evil laugh, but only a pale echo of Sauron, as he flung back his hood. Once more I was struck will the extreme hilarity of the situation - the Nazgul was invisible, and his crown was all that could be seen of his face. Memories of 'The Invisible Man', both the movie and the song, flashed through my head, and I sniggered slightly as I thought about how the Nazgul would react if he knew who I was mentally comparing him to. Boromir and Haldir looked at me strangely, and I turned my attention back to what was going on.
"Old fool! This is my hour! Do you not know Death when you see it? Die now and curse in vain!" The Nazgul was saying, and as he raised his sword, I spoke, a smile still twitching on my lips.
"It is you who does not know Death when you see it, Witch King. Yes, this is your hour. Your hour to die." I said, and the Witch King looked at me in surprise. I imagine he was about to reply, but just then, I heard a faint cock crow, the sound of a lone rooster welcoming the day that could not be seen through the darkness. And as if in answer there came from far away the sound of horns. They echoed over the plains, the horns of the North, blown wildly, and I smiled, as did Gandalf.
"Rohan is come!" Boromir called from behind me, startling me slightly, and with a last glance at the four that stood before him, the Lord of the Nazgul left the Gate and vanished.
"Come, let us go ready to join the Rohirrim on the battle field!" Gandalf said to us, riding over. "Shadowfax, if you will consent to bear the lady, I have need to speak to Erin on the way to the Citadel." Shadowfax made a snort that sounded like consent, and Gandalf took my hand and hoisted me up onto the horses back.
"Follow us as quickly as you can!" Gandalf told Haldir and Boromir, and then urged Shadowfax forward. Once we were riding, he spoke up again.
"I have little time to speak, so I shall be blunt. I must go out to defeat the Witch King, but you must stay up in the Citadel in my place to advise Denethor - we shall have to tell him that you have knowledge of the future to get him to agree, I'm afraid, but it must be done." Gandalf said gravely.
"No Gandalf. You shall not defeat the Witch King. That honour lies with Merry and Eowyn." I said, and glancing back at the wizard, grinned at his surprised expression.
"Why -" he began, but I cut him off, anticipating his question.
"Am I telling you that?" I finished, and he nodded. "Boromir's life has affected many things, the most of which is that Denethor is not as in as fey a mood as he should be, since he only has one son wounded, instead of one wounded and one dead. Right about now, he was SUPPOSED to be trying to burn himself and Faramir on a pyre in the funeral halls, and you were to ride and rescue Faramir, but that will not happen now." We'd reached the Citadel now, and dismounted. Out on the battlefield beyond the city, I heard the screech of the Nazgul, and looked out to see the Witch King descending on a rider.
"You could not reach him before he was dead now, anyways." I said, and Gandalf nodded as Haldir arrived. As if on cue, Denethor and Legolas's brother came out of the Citadel and took stock of who was before them.
"We must ride to help the Rohirrim - they are a mighty force, and welcome, but they cannot defeat the Orcs on their own." Denethor said gravely.
"I fear not even our combined strength can defeat the Orcs." the Mirkwood prince said sadly.
"Ah, but all the players have not yet arrived." I said with a grin, thoroughly enjoying myself, giving out cryptic hints. Denethor and the Mirkwood prince looked at me strangely, and just then Boromir arrived.
"Come, my son, today we ride out together to battle!" Denethor told Boromir, turning his attention from me to his son. "Let us go, and rally our men! Perhaps we shall find where Prince Imrahil and his swan knights have got to!" So we started off, Gandalf, Denethor, Boromir, Haldir, the Mirkwood prince and I, and as we went, the men of Gondor, as well as the visiting Elves, gathered behind us. By the time we'd gotten our horses, and readied ourselves, the whole might of those in Gondor was ready and waiting to go out on the battle field behind us. At that moment, Prince Imrahil rode up, his knights behind him. He exchanged words with Denethor, and then his eyes flicked over to me as I sat on my horse, appearing as ready as everyone else to go out.
"Surely the Lady would be safer within the city?" he asked, surprised, and I just looked back at him calmly. Boromir seemed to noticed for the first time that I was with them, and from the concern that suddenly slipped into his eyes, I had a feeling he was going to try and ask me to stay behind. Well, let him try. I was going.
"Erin, you cannot come out with us." Boromir said softly, riding over to me. His voice was so low that I doubt anyone but Haldir and the Mirkwood Prince, with their Elven hearing, could hear.
"Why not? I survived at Helm's Deep, I can handle here." I asked Boromir, keeping my voice as low as his.
"Helm's deep was a battle, this is war." Boromir said, then hesitated before continuing. "Though your skills with the sword are great, and you are the fastest learner I've ever seen, the fighting out on the field will be unlike anything you've encountered before. You do not have the experience to..." He swallowed, unable to finish his sentence, and his eyes took on a pleading edge as he tried again. "Please, Erin, I could not bear to lose you, and there's every chance that I will if you come out onto the battlefield with us."
"There's just as much a chance that you'll die, Boromir. And I don't want to lose you anymore then you want to lose me." I reached out and stroked Boromir's cheek tenderly, then whispered, so low only Boromir could hear, "I love you, Boromir." Though Boromir didn't react surprised to that confession, inside, I was startled. It had slipped out without thought, and yet, now that it was said, I knew without a doubt that I truly had grown to love Boromir.
"And you are my heart, Lady Erin." Boromir replied, and caught my hand as his eyes filled with pleading and desperation. "Please, stay here." I wavered, but then my stubborn streak kicked in.
"I am going out with you." I said. Boromir gave a pained sigh, and looked prepared to argue more, but then I felt a tug on my arm.
"Lady Erin, may I speak with you?" I glanced at Haldir curiously, and Boromir plainly looked annoyed with the elf. Haldir ignored Boromir's look, and I, curious, let myself be pulled off to the side. To my surprise, Gandalf joined us.
"Lady Erin, you know of the future. You know how this battle will turn out. You have read of it in your world." Gandalf stated, and I nodded.
"So?" I asked, looking at the two of them curiously.
"Do you really want to go out there and fight?" Haldir asked quietly. I paused.
"What do you mean?" I said.
"You are not used to the battle field - you could barely stand Helm's Deep, and that you stood only while Boromir was in danger, from either me or the orcs." Haldir said. I blinked, and realized that he was right - that was the only reason I had been able to stand the bloodshed at Helm's Deep, as well as Amon Hen. The one battle where I'd not been concerned about Boromir - the one in Moria - I'd blocked out, not wanting to remember it. But even now, as I thought back on the battles at Amon Hen and Helm's Deep, I found I could only remember the battle in relation to whether or not Boromir was safe.
"Stay here, Lady Erin." Gandalf asked me.
"But -" I started, and Gandalf put up his hand, stopping me.
"You have my word that Boromir will come back unharmed." he said. I eyed him, then sighed.
"Fine." I said. I wasn't happy about staying behind - despite Gandalf's reassurance, I still didn't think Boromir would come back unharmed - but with not only Boromir, but Haldir and Gandalf as well, asking me to stay behind, it wasn't exactly easy to say no.
"I'm sure Lord Denethor would give his permission for you to be let into the fortress so you could watch the battle from there." Gandalf said.
"I don't think there's enough guards remaining up there to stop me, anyways." I said grumpily, and then, unable to stand it there any longer, I kicked my horse into a gallop, heading for the Citadel. I heard Boromir call after me, but I didn't stop. Emotions were tumbling about inside of me, and I needed to find someplace to think. Without even noticing the guards, I entered the Citadel and headed for stairs - the higher I could get, the better.
Somehow, I managed to find my way to the tallest part of the Citadel, to the hallway outside the room where only Denethor was allowed. Amazingly, there were no guards around the room. I pondered whether I should enter the room or not, but finally shrugged. As far as I knew, only the palantir was in the room beyond, and if not, I could leave and nobody would be the wiser. So I walked in, and found that indeed the palantir was the only thing there, resting on a pillar in the center of the room. It was covered, but I could still tell what it was. I skirted around the palantir, eyeing it suspiciously, remembering that Sauron had at least one of the stones, and not wanting to meet him again. Instead, I went to the one window in the room and looked out over the battle.
What I saw made me glad Gandalf and Haldir had convinced me to stay behind. Even from this height, the carnage was visible. The ground seemed to have been turned a redish-black, covered in the mixed blood of orcs and men, as well as other creatures, where the ground was visible at all. Over it ran, like little ants, the fighters, carrying out a thousand little battles at once, all trying to win in the hopes that they would help to secure an overall victory.
And even up here - far away from the fields, high above them - the stench and the sounds came. The stench was diluted somewhat, but the sounds had only risen, gaining clarity as they rose through the air. It sent my mind whirling, and my swirling emotions were forgotten as I tried to cope with the sensory information that was flooding my brain.
Most important of all the information my senses were feeding me was the image of the field. In it, I could see without a doubt that the forces of the Rohirrim, Gondorians, swan knights and elves were outnumbered by at least two to one. Swallowing, I tried to remind myself that it would all turn out well - Aragorn would come, and the orcs would be driven off, the good guys would win. I guess the cries of the Nazgul were getting to me or something, then, because no matter how much I told myself, how many reasons for victory on the free peoples part I thought up, a dark shadow was always on my mind, grasping at just as many reasons for failure as for victory.
My slow slip into depression was interrupted by horns and bells ringing out over the city, and the call of guards reached my ears as I looked out over the city, curious as to what was going on. "Back to the walls!" the guards cried "The Corsairs of Umbar are coming! Come back to the City before all are overwhelmed!" I grinned, and leaned out of the window, looking off down the Anduin. I saw the ships sailing closer, their black sails blending in with the sky, and the depression disappeared in a puff of smoke.
"You have no hold on me, Sauron, you never will." I said with a giggle, looking off to Mordor, knowing that, somehow, the Dark Lord had been responsible for my thoughts. But now, my mind was my own, and I turned eagerly to watch the ships approach. Aragorn's arrival at the battle on this day had always been my favorite part of the book, and now I had a chance to watch that very scene that I liked so much. I made a mental note to give Gandalf and Haldir a big hug for convincing me to stay behind as I watched the ships make their way towards the battlefield.
As the ships approached, and the men on the battlefield saw them, I caught a few phrases of a rather depressing-sounding verse on the wind. Looking down, I saw Eomer and the Rohirrim gathered on a hill, their banner set in the middle of them, ready to meet what they thought was their doom. My grin widened, and I looked out to the ships, eagerly, wanting to see the famous banner that Arwen had made.
When the banner snapped out on the breeze, gleaming in the few rays of sunlight that had found their way through the darkness, I found myself giggling insanely, even more so as I watched the battlefield. It was in chaos, with various creatures on it realizing that what they thought was reinforcements was more foes, or what they thought was the last crushing blow was instead the cavalry come to save them. The ships landed, and I watched those on them disembark, saw Aragorn lead the charge, Anduril and Narsil shining even in the darkness of the day.
The day sped by as I watched the battle, and I grinned as I saw the orcish army pressed back, the Nazgul fleeing, the three separate armies of the free peoples meeting, muttering vague 'nyah nyah nah boo boo' like statements in the general direction of Sauron. I was still giddy with the joy of victory as I turned from the window with the sun set, leaving the room to go meet Aragorn and the other captains as they came to the city.
~ Quote: ~
"Give me a reason to kill you. Please?" - Major West, 'Lost in Space' (the movie) - to Doctor Smith
~ Disclaimer: ~
Erin's mine, the rest are not.
~ Chapter XVII~
~ The Battle of the Pelennor Fields ~
I fell asleep sometime during the night. I don't know when. But I know I had to have fallen asleep, since you can't wake up without first falling asleep. Whenever I fell asleep, I was woken later to the calls of fire in the city. Groggily, sore and stiff for sleeping in a sitting position, I pulled myself to my feet and stared down at the city, to see that the entire first ring of the city was in flame. Men, and the few women who had stayed, were scrambling with buckets, but they stumbled in weariness, and in despair, for the Nazgul had come in force. I'd missed the heads of those already slain being thrown over the wall, thankfully, but now, seeing the city in chaos and despair, I decided it was time for me to find whoever was in charge.
Entering the healing house from the gardens, I saw that more patients had sprung up out of the wood work. Hastily, I checked on Faramir, who was in just the same condition as before, and then rushed out. Outside, I glanced around. I remembered reading that Gandalf and Prince Imrahil walked around the city at about this time, and, hoping they were still doing so, I started off in a random direction. Amazingly, I hadn't gone very far before I came upon Gandalf, Prince Imrahil, Denethor, Boromir, Haldir and prince from Mirkwood walking along the street, deep in discussion. Pippin trailed along behind them, looking out of place, and he was the first to notice me as I approached them.
"Lady Erin!" he cried happily, and I smiled at the hobbit. The lords, princes and wizard looked up when Pippin said my name, and I half-bowed to them.
"Ah, Erin, it is good to see you." Gandalf said, motioning me to come closer, and Pippin's face fell slightly when he realized I'd be joining the group he was following as they talked, instead of walking and talking with him.
"We were just discussing the defense of the city, and we seem to be having a dispute over when the Rohirrim will come. Perhaps you could help us out?" Gandalf asked, and from the way he glanced at me, I knew he was not asking for an opinion, but knowledge of the future.
"I don't think I could be much help." I said dryly, and received a veiled glare from Gandalf. I grinned, then answered. "But I think the Rohirrim will come at dawn."
"So soon?" Denethor asked, surprised.
"Our most hopeful estimate was late afternoon." Prince Imrahil said skeptically.
"Nonetheless, I trust the Lady Erin's estimation, Prince Imrahil." Gandalf said gravely.
"As do I." Haldir put in. Imrahil paused, and then nodded. Boromir, Denethor and the Mirkwood prince accepted the estimation just as readily, with both Gandalf and Haldir backing it, and then they fell to discussing the defense of the city with the added might of the Rohirrim at dawn. Despite accepting the estimate, however, those that did not know that I came from a different world, Boromir included, seemed to be constantly glancing back at me, curiously or thoughtfully, as I walked beside Pippin. I pretended not to notice, however, as Pippin and I talked in low tones about various things. Then there came a loud boom from the gates, and the heads of the men in front of Pippin and I snapped up.
"By Eru, what was that?" Haldir asked, alarmed.
"The Witch King has come." I said with a sad smile. "Today to gates of Gondor break." The men glanced at me in alarm, and then set off at a run, in several different directions. Denethor and Legolas's brother, with Pippin following, went back to the Citadel, Imrahil headed off somewhere (presumably to his knights), Gandalf went off to find Shadowfax, which left Haldir, Boromir and I to dash down to the gate.
By the time I reached the gate, I was ahead of Boromir and Haldir, who slowed for each of the Witch King's cries, which affected them, but not me. As I stood back from the gate, waiting for Boromir and Haldir to catch up, the Lord of the Nazgul cried a third and last time. The ram struck again, just as Boromir and Haldir caught up with me, and the gates burst.
In rode the Lord of the Nazgul, looming up as a great black shape against the fires beyond the city walls, grown to a vast menace of despair. In he rode, under the archway that no enemy ever yet had passed, and the men of Gondor fled around me. Boromir and Haldir looked tempted to follow, indeed, they tried to convince me to come with them, but I stood firm in front of the Nazgul, just as Gandalf rode up on Shadowfax.
"You cannot enter here," said Gandalf, halting the Lord of the Nazgul in his steps. "Go back to the abyss prepared for you! Go back! Fall into the nothingness that awaits you and your Master. Go!" The Nazgul laughed, an evil laugh, but only a pale echo of Sauron, as he flung back his hood. Once more I was struck will the extreme hilarity of the situation - the Nazgul was invisible, and his crown was all that could be seen of his face. Memories of 'The Invisible Man', both the movie and the song, flashed through my head, and I sniggered slightly as I thought about how the Nazgul would react if he knew who I was mentally comparing him to. Boromir and Haldir looked at me strangely, and I turned my attention back to what was going on.
"Old fool! This is my hour! Do you not know Death when you see it? Die now and curse in vain!" The Nazgul was saying, and as he raised his sword, I spoke, a smile still twitching on my lips.
"It is you who does not know Death when you see it, Witch King. Yes, this is your hour. Your hour to die." I said, and the Witch King looked at me in surprise. I imagine he was about to reply, but just then, I heard a faint cock crow, the sound of a lone rooster welcoming the day that could not be seen through the darkness. And as if in answer there came from far away the sound of horns. They echoed over the plains, the horns of the North, blown wildly, and I smiled, as did Gandalf.
"Rohan is come!" Boromir called from behind me, startling me slightly, and with a last glance at the four that stood before him, the Lord of the Nazgul left the Gate and vanished.
"Come, let us go ready to join the Rohirrim on the battle field!" Gandalf said to us, riding over. "Shadowfax, if you will consent to bear the lady, I have need to speak to Erin on the way to the Citadel." Shadowfax made a snort that sounded like consent, and Gandalf took my hand and hoisted me up onto the horses back.
"Follow us as quickly as you can!" Gandalf told Haldir and Boromir, and then urged Shadowfax forward. Once we were riding, he spoke up again.
"I have little time to speak, so I shall be blunt. I must go out to defeat the Witch King, but you must stay up in the Citadel in my place to advise Denethor - we shall have to tell him that you have knowledge of the future to get him to agree, I'm afraid, but it must be done." Gandalf said gravely.
"No Gandalf. You shall not defeat the Witch King. That honour lies with Merry and Eowyn." I said, and glancing back at the wizard, grinned at his surprised expression.
"Why -" he began, but I cut him off, anticipating his question.
"Am I telling you that?" I finished, and he nodded. "Boromir's life has affected many things, the most of which is that Denethor is not as in as fey a mood as he should be, since he only has one son wounded, instead of one wounded and one dead. Right about now, he was SUPPOSED to be trying to burn himself and Faramir on a pyre in the funeral halls, and you were to ride and rescue Faramir, but that will not happen now." We'd reached the Citadel now, and dismounted. Out on the battlefield beyond the city, I heard the screech of the Nazgul, and looked out to see the Witch King descending on a rider.
"You could not reach him before he was dead now, anyways." I said, and Gandalf nodded as Haldir arrived. As if on cue, Denethor and Legolas's brother came out of the Citadel and took stock of who was before them.
"We must ride to help the Rohirrim - they are a mighty force, and welcome, but they cannot defeat the Orcs on their own." Denethor said gravely.
"I fear not even our combined strength can defeat the Orcs." the Mirkwood prince said sadly.
"Ah, but all the players have not yet arrived." I said with a grin, thoroughly enjoying myself, giving out cryptic hints. Denethor and the Mirkwood prince looked at me strangely, and just then Boromir arrived.
"Come, my son, today we ride out together to battle!" Denethor told Boromir, turning his attention from me to his son. "Let us go, and rally our men! Perhaps we shall find where Prince Imrahil and his swan knights have got to!" So we started off, Gandalf, Denethor, Boromir, Haldir, the Mirkwood prince and I, and as we went, the men of Gondor, as well as the visiting Elves, gathered behind us. By the time we'd gotten our horses, and readied ourselves, the whole might of those in Gondor was ready and waiting to go out on the battle field behind us. At that moment, Prince Imrahil rode up, his knights behind him. He exchanged words with Denethor, and then his eyes flicked over to me as I sat on my horse, appearing as ready as everyone else to go out.
"Surely the Lady would be safer within the city?" he asked, surprised, and I just looked back at him calmly. Boromir seemed to noticed for the first time that I was with them, and from the concern that suddenly slipped into his eyes, I had a feeling he was going to try and ask me to stay behind. Well, let him try. I was going.
"Erin, you cannot come out with us." Boromir said softly, riding over to me. His voice was so low that I doubt anyone but Haldir and the Mirkwood Prince, with their Elven hearing, could hear.
"Why not? I survived at Helm's Deep, I can handle here." I asked Boromir, keeping my voice as low as his.
"Helm's deep was a battle, this is war." Boromir said, then hesitated before continuing. "Though your skills with the sword are great, and you are the fastest learner I've ever seen, the fighting out on the field will be unlike anything you've encountered before. You do not have the experience to..." He swallowed, unable to finish his sentence, and his eyes took on a pleading edge as he tried again. "Please, Erin, I could not bear to lose you, and there's every chance that I will if you come out onto the battlefield with us."
"There's just as much a chance that you'll die, Boromir. And I don't want to lose you anymore then you want to lose me." I reached out and stroked Boromir's cheek tenderly, then whispered, so low only Boromir could hear, "I love you, Boromir." Though Boromir didn't react surprised to that confession, inside, I was startled. It had slipped out without thought, and yet, now that it was said, I knew without a doubt that I truly had grown to love Boromir.
"And you are my heart, Lady Erin." Boromir replied, and caught my hand as his eyes filled with pleading and desperation. "Please, stay here." I wavered, but then my stubborn streak kicked in.
"I am going out with you." I said. Boromir gave a pained sigh, and looked prepared to argue more, but then I felt a tug on my arm.
"Lady Erin, may I speak with you?" I glanced at Haldir curiously, and Boromir plainly looked annoyed with the elf. Haldir ignored Boromir's look, and I, curious, let myself be pulled off to the side. To my surprise, Gandalf joined us.
"Lady Erin, you know of the future. You know how this battle will turn out. You have read of it in your world." Gandalf stated, and I nodded.
"So?" I asked, looking at the two of them curiously.
"Do you really want to go out there and fight?" Haldir asked quietly. I paused.
"What do you mean?" I said.
"You are not used to the battle field - you could barely stand Helm's Deep, and that you stood only while Boromir was in danger, from either me or the orcs." Haldir said. I blinked, and realized that he was right - that was the only reason I had been able to stand the bloodshed at Helm's Deep, as well as Amon Hen. The one battle where I'd not been concerned about Boromir - the one in Moria - I'd blocked out, not wanting to remember it. But even now, as I thought back on the battles at Amon Hen and Helm's Deep, I found I could only remember the battle in relation to whether or not Boromir was safe.
"Stay here, Lady Erin." Gandalf asked me.
"But -" I started, and Gandalf put up his hand, stopping me.
"You have my word that Boromir will come back unharmed." he said. I eyed him, then sighed.
"Fine." I said. I wasn't happy about staying behind - despite Gandalf's reassurance, I still didn't think Boromir would come back unharmed - but with not only Boromir, but Haldir and Gandalf as well, asking me to stay behind, it wasn't exactly easy to say no.
"I'm sure Lord Denethor would give his permission for you to be let into the fortress so you could watch the battle from there." Gandalf said.
"I don't think there's enough guards remaining up there to stop me, anyways." I said grumpily, and then, unable to stand it there any longer, I kicked my horse into a gallop, heading for the Citadel. I heard Boromir call after me, but I didn't stop. Emotions were tumbling about inside of me, and I needed to find someplace to think. Without even noticing the guards, I entered the Citadel and headed for stairs - the higher I could get, the better.
Somehow, I managed to find my way to the tallest part of the Citadel, to the hallway outside the room where only Denethor was allowed. Amazingly, there were no guards around the room. I pondered whether I should enter the room or not, but finally shrugged. As far as I knew, only the palantir was in the room beyond, and if not, I could leave and nobody would be the wiser. So I walked in, and found that indeed the palantir was the only thing there, resting on a pillar in the center of the room. It was covered, but I could still tell what it was. I skirted around the palantir, eyeing it suspiciously, remembering that Sauron had at least one of the stones, and not wanting to meet him again. Instead, I went to the one window in the room and looked out over the battle.
What I saw made me glad Gandalf and Haldir had convinced me to stay behind. Even from this height, the carnage was visible. The ground seemed to have been turned a redish-black, covered in the mixed blood of orcs and men, as well as other creatures, where the ground was visible at all. Over it ran, like little ants, the fighters, carrying out a thousand little battles at once, all trying to win in the hopes that they would help to secure an overall victory.
And even up here - far away from the fields, high above them - the stench and the sounds came. The stench was diluted somewhat, but the sounds had only risen, gaining clarity as they rose through the air. It sent my mind whirling, and my swirling emotions were forgotten as I tried to cope with the sensory information that was flooding my brain.
Most important of all the information my senses were feeding me was the image of the field. In it, I could see without a doubt that the forces of the Rohirrim, Gondorians, swan knights and elves were outnumbered by at least two to one. Swallowing, I tried to remind myself that it would all turn out well - Aragorn would come, and the orcs would be driven off, the good guys would win. I guess the cries of the Nazgul were getting to me or something, then, because no matter how much I told myself, how many reasons for victory on the free peoples part I thought up, a dark shadow was always on my mind, grasping at just as many reasons for failure as for victory.
My slow slip into depression was interrupted by horns and bells ringing out over the city, and the call of guards reached my ears as I looked out over the city, curious as to what was going on. "Back to the walls!" the guards cried "The Corsairs of Umbar are coming! Come back to the City before all are overwhelmed!" I grinned, and leaned out of the window, looking off down the Anduin. I saw the ships sailing closer, their black sails blending in with the sky, and the depression disappeared in a puff of smoke.
"You have no hold on me, Sauron, you never will." I said with a giggle, looking off to Mordor, knowing that, somehow, the Dark Lord had been responsible for my thoughts. But now, my mind was my own, and I turned eagerly to watch the ships approach. Aragorn's arrival at the battle on this day had always been my favorite part of the book, and now I had a chance to watch that very scene that I liked so much. I made a mental note to give Gandalf and Haldir a big hug for convincing me to stay behind as I watched the ships make their way towards the battlefield.
As the ships approached, and the men on the battlefield saw them, I caught a few phrases of a rather depressing-sounding verse on the wind. Looking down, I saw Eomer and the Rohirrim gathered on a hill, their banner set in the middle of them, ready to meet what they thought was their doom. My grin widened, and I looked out to the ships, eagerly, wanting to see the famous banner that Arwen had made.
When the banner snapped out on the breeze, gleaming in the few rays of sunlight that had found their way through the darkness, I found myself giggling insanely, even more so as I watched the battlefield. It was in chaos, with various creatures on it realizing that what they thought was reinforcements was more foes, or what they thought was the last crushing blow was instead the cavalry come to save them. The ships landed, and I watched those on them disembark, saw Aragorn lead the charge, Anduril and Narsil shining even in the darkness of the day.
The day sped by as I watched the battle, and I grinned as I saw the orcish army pressed back, the Nazgul fleeing, the three separate armies of the free peoples meeting, muttering vague 'nyah nyah nah boo boo' like statements in the general direction of Sauron. I was still giddy with the joy of victory as I turned from the window with the sun set, leaving the room to go meet Aragorn and the other captains as they came to the city.