Meanwhile, at the Malfoys..
Lucius was sitting on the couch, eating parmesean cheese.
His favourite pastime.
Narcissa was sitting on the other side of the couch, knitting - an unlikely, although existent, habit of the mother. She blinked, looking over at her golden-haired Ex-Death Eater, who now seemed to be a golden-haired Cheese Eater, as he had the can open and was basically pouring it down his throat. She smiled.
What a happy, normal couple they were.
"You know what, honey?"
Lucius blinked, looking over at his wife out of the corner of his eye, still chugging the grated cheese. "Wha?"
".. I wish you'd stop calling out Lord Voldemort's name when we're in the sack."
".. Sorry Narcissa .. I'm just not fully .. recovered .. from all those years as a transvestite Death Eater."
She smiled, nodding, and returned to her knitting. "I know, hon."
..Yes, what a happy, normal couple.
-
About a day or so later, one of the Malfoy family owls dropped a letter in Lucius' lap. He heaved a dramatic sigh, clapping his hands. "CRINKLEBERRY!"
A small female house elf ran into the room at a record pace. "Y-you c-c-c- called M-master..?.."
Lucius sneered, rapping Crinkleberry on the head with his ever-present sleek, black cane. "You were to slow. Faster next time"
She bit her lip, nodding. "Oh yes, Master, Crinkleberry will have to punish herself for being so slow."
A nod, and Lucius sneered at her once more. "Pick this letter up off of my lap and open it for me, would you? The exertion might ruin my complexion." He sighed delicately.
Crinkleberry nodded enthusiastically, and fearfully took the letter from her master's lap. "It's from .. Azkaban, sir .."
Lucius raised a brow. "What could THAT be..?.. Well, what are you waiting for?! Go on! Open it!"
He kicked the house elf rather violently, causing her to fall over. But she quickly sprang right back up, caution and fear renewed, and opened the letter, taking out the piece of parchment enclosed within the envelope, reading aloud. "D-dear M-mister Malfoy.. We regret to inform you that your brother, Ralf, has passed away within our confines .. Three days after his death, we found him innocent of his crime, which was, of course, running a badger through with a muggle instrument called a 'tampon'.. It was only on that day that we actually witnessed a tampon, and realized that it isn't sharp, so you can't run someone through with it .. It seems that, in addition to his innocence, your Ralf was a prophet. Before he died, he wrote a mile of parchment about the future. Much of it is classified, but we felt that you might want to know of the bits concerning your son, Draco .. It seems that Draco may, if events are not changed, marry a muggle-born witch. We feel that you may want to go to Hogwarts and see what's up with your son. Yours truly, the Azkaban staff."
Crinkleberry looked up at her master, wide-eyed. "Wh-what does this mean, Master..?.."
Lucius growled angrily. "It means what I've suspected all along. Ralf Malfoy was an instrument of God.." He fell to his knees, sobbing. "WHY ME?! WHY MY BROTHER?! WHY ALWAYS THE MALFOY FAMILY!?!?!?!?!? OH, THE HUMANITY!"
Crinkleberry blinked. "Uhm. Sir.. I meant what does it mean about Draco."
Lucius looked up at her through his tears, and blinked. "Oh. That."
He got to his feet, brushing the waist-length strands of gold from his eyes. "Well, I don't know. I'll have to go see. This should be interesting.." He smirked evilly. "To see if Azkaban's a bunch of blithering idiots or not. I assume that they are... I really can't picture Draco doing something of that sort. He's a good boy, he is."
Crinkleberry nodded, and thought about peppermints.
-
Narcissa was out in the solarium, talking to the birds.
"Cheep cheep! Cheep cheep cheep cheep cheep cheep cheep!"
The birds blinked. One bird looked at the other, raising a feather. 'I think we got a nutcase on our hands.'
'I agree, Freddie.'
"What, little birdies? Why do you look at each other in that manner? Have I made a connection? Tee-hee. You'd be surprised to know how many of the Malfoys can talk to birdies! 3!"
The birds - chickadees, to be exact -- just stared at her.
'What the fuck.'
'I agree, Freddie.'
-
Lucius dotted the 'i' in his signature, and slipped the folded parchment into an envelope, handing it to an owl. "Take it to Dumb Bell Dorf."
The owl blinked.
"Er.. Dumbledore."
A screech, and the owl took off in the direction of Hogwarts.
-
A/N
Okay, well, it was shorter than I would've hoped, but .. *Shrug.*
For anyone who didn't understand, these are the events that transpired over at the Malfoys' during the events of Chapter 4.
Also, I'd like to give a thank you to my loyal R&R..ers..: Courtney, Phillys-kun (Crazy Man Phil), Alexis, SomeoneIDon'tKnow, Koaii no Onna- sempai (xonlyindreamsx), Raya Lyons, Spitfire06, Recnadeneres, Anonymous, and Strawberri. Please keep R&Ring!
Another thing has been brought to my attention by the reviewers (::coughanonymousandsomeoneidon'tknowcough::).
The 'harry wouldn't act like that!' issue.
Since so many people are talking about it, I'll explain.
I myself don't like Harry as a character. He's too .. heroic .. for me. He always defeats Voldemort. Even when he was a BABY. I mean, I know it's fiction, and I shouldn't ask for Rowling to make it realistic, but I just don't like him that much. So he makes for a great victim.
Plus, this is a DM/HG fic (and maybe a little bit centered on SS/MM, too). Who really cares what Harry acts like? He's a minor character.
So that's why Harry's acting this way - I need a villain.
But, don't worry - the ending will be sickeningly happy enough for everyone, including the Harry fans.
Again, please R&R! Thankee!
Lucius was sitting on the couch, eating parmesean cheese.
His favourite pastime.
Narcissa was sitting on the other side of the couch, knitting - an unlikely, although existent, habit of the mother. She blinked, looking over at her golden-haired Ex-Death Eater, who now seemed to be a golden-haired Cheese Eater, as he had the can open and was basically pouring it down his throat. She smiled.
What a happy, normal couple they were.
"You know what, honey?"
Lucius blinked, looking over at his wife out of the corner of his eye, still chugging the grated cheese. "Wha?"
".. I wish you'd stop calling out Lord Voldemort's name when we're in the sack."
".. Sorry Narcissa .. I'm just not fully .. recovered .. from all those years as a transvestite Death Eater."
She smiled, nodding, and returned to her knitting. "I know, hon."
..Yes, what a happy, normal couple.
-
About a day or so later, one of the Malfoy family owls dropped a letter in Lucius' lap. He heaved a dramatic sigh, clapping his hands. "CRINKLEBERRY!"
A small female house elf ran into the room at a record pace. "Y-you c-c-c- called M-master..?.."
Lucius sneered, rapping Crinkleberry on the head with his ever-present sleek, black cane. "You were to slow. Faster next time"
She bit her lip, nodding. "Oh yes, Master, Crinkleberry will have to punish herself for being so slow."
A nod, and Lucius sneered at her once more. "Pick this letter up off of my lap and open it for me, would you? The exertion might ruin my complexion." He sighed delicately.
Crinkleberry nodded enthusiastically, and fearfully took the letter from her master's lap. "It's from .. Azkaban, sir .."
Lucius raised a brow. "What could THAT be..?.. Well, what are you waiting for?! Go on! Open it!"
He kicked the house elf rather violently, causing her to fall over. But she quickly sprang right back up, caution and fear renewed, and opened the letter, taking out the piece of parchment enclosed within the envelope, reading aloud. "D-dear M-mister Malfoy.. We regret to inform you that your brother, Ralf, has passed away within our confines .. Three days after his death, we found him innocent of his crime, which was, of course, running a badger through with a muggle instrument called a 'tampon'.. It was only on that day that we actually witnessed a tampon, and realized that it isn't sharp, so you can't run someone through with it .. It seems that, in addition to his innocence, your Ralf was a prophet. Before he died, he wrote a mile of parchment about the future. Much of it is classified, but we felt that you might want to know of the bits concerning your son, Draco .. It seems that Draco may, if events are not changed, marry a muggle-born witch. We feel that you may want to go to Hogwarts and see what's up with your son. Yours truly, the Azkaban staff."
Crinkleberry looked up at her master, wide-eyed. "Wh-what does this mean, Master..?.."
Lucius growled angrily. "It means what I've suspected all along. Ralf Malfoy was an instrument of God.." He fell to his knees, sobbing. "WHY ME?! WHY MY BROTHER?! WHY ALWAYS THE MALFOY FAMILY!?!?!?!?!? OH, THE HUMANITY!"
Crinkleberry blinked. "Uhm. Sir.. I meant what does it mean about Draco."
Lucius looked up at her through his tears, and blinked. "Oh. That."
He got to his feet, brushing the waist-length strands of gold from his eyes. "Well, I don't know. I'll have to go see. This should be interesting.." He smirked evilly. "To see if Azkaban's a bunch of blithering idiots or not. I assume that they are... I really can't picture Draco doing something of that sort. He's a good boy, he is."
Crinkleberry nodded, and thought about peppermints.
-
Narcissa was out in the solarium, talking to the birds.
"Cheep cheep! Cheep cheep cheep cheep cheep cheep cheep!"
The birds blinked. One bird looked at the other, raising a feather. 'I think we got a nutcase on our hands.'
'I agree, Freddie.'
"What, little birdies? Why do you look at each other in that manner? Have I made a connection? Tee-hee. You'd be surprised to know how many of the Malfoys can talk to birdies! 3!"
The birds - chickadees, to be exact -- just stared at her.
'What the fuck.'
'I agree, Freddie.'
-
Lucius dotted the 'i' in his signature, and slipped the folded parchment into an envelope, handing it to an owl. "Take it to Dumb Bell Dorf."
The owl blinked.
"Er.. Dumbledore."
A screech, and the owl took off in the direction of Hogwarts.
-
A/N
Okay, well, it was shorter than I would've hoped, but .. *Shrug.*
For anyone who didn't understand, these are the events that transpired over at the Malfoys' during the events of Chapter 4.
Also, I'd like to give a thank you to my loyal R&R..ers..: Courtney, Phillys-kun (Crazy Man Phil), Alexis, SomeoneIDon'tKnow, Koaii no Onna- sempai (xonlyindreamsx), Raya Lyons, Spitfire06, Recnadeneres, Anonymous, and Strawberri. Please keep R&Ring!
Another thing has been brought to my attention by the reviewers (::coughanonymousandsomeoneidon'tknowcough::).
The 'harry wouldn't act like that!' issue.
Since so many people are talking about it, I'll explain.
I myself don't like Harry as a character. He's too .. heroic .. for me. He always defeats Voldemort. Even when he was a BABY. I mean, I know it's fiction, and I shouldn't ask for Rowling to make it realistic, but I just don't like him that much. So he makes for a great victim.
Plus, this is a DM/HG fic (and maybe a little bit centered on SS/MM, too). Who really cares what Harry acts like? He's a minor character.
So that's why Harry's acting this way - I need a villain.
But, don't worry - the ending will be sickeningly happy enough for everyone, including the Harry fans.
Again, please R&R! Thankee!