Diary ~

We've been in Neet for about two weeks now. Two weeks since Setie's death. Luanna has become very quiet. She sings more than she speaks. Her relationship with Setie had been very close, and this must hurt her greatly. Only being with her other sisters and the queen will she be able to begin to heal. I leave her as she is at the moment, worrying that I might make things worse.

The townspeople had hated me in the beginning, because I was an outsider and I was leading them harshly, but now that I have healed many of them and they have gotten to know me, they have begun to love me. It is a good feeling, one that I welcome under the circumstances.

Shana has awaken from her coma, to my eternal relief. It was easier to convince her what happened this time, because she was conscious when her magic first began. I make her stay in bed though, nothing too strenuous other than to give advice to people about their injuries. She and Luanna sing to ease the pain of the people, little hymns or lullabies. Luanna has not sang that song that she sang in Setie's last moments. I think it may be something they composed together, and thus, private and closed off to the rest of us.

We are running low on supplies, and we have sent word to Fueno and the Queen to inform her, but in the meanwhile, I have created three different groups of hunters, to go into the forest and bring back food. I had wanted to be in one of them, but Shana, the roles reversed, had chided me, saying that my arm was still unpredictable, and that if I went, I might do more harm than good.

So I wait now at the borders of Neet, waiting for the hunters to return. My arm is out of its sling, though it still hurts like a dull ache. I am tired, writing because I am bored. Basically, the people have begun to settle. The injuries are stable, they do not complain as much, and we have reached some sort of balance with things. We won't live here forever, of course, just u

Whew, that scared the hell outta me for a while. Lloyd, Dart, and the others are back. I was writing and was interrupted by them, as you can tell. All of a sudden I hear a yell, and then arms are around me, pinning my hands at my sides, making me drop this diary. I knew it was Lloyd even before he started yelling.

"Why didn't you tell us what you were going to do? Deningrad is completely destroyed and we thought you and Shana along with it! Nobody in the entire blasted town knew what happened to you or to most of the others! We wandered around for days before Dart realized that maybe you'd be here! You should have told the villagers to inform us!"

He was crushing me against him with such force that it only enhanced the pain in my arm. "Lloyd, as lovely as it is to see you again, you're hurting me. My arm…"

He pulled back then, and a pain struck my chest. I had forgotten how beautiful he was. I know that I still have most of my beauty from my younger years, but it is strange when he is lovelier than I am. The journey and the new worries that came along with it have brought the beginnings of gray to my hair, along with lines at my mouth from all the screaming and crying I have done. Yet still he looks upon me with wonder and fondness. I am ever so grateful. Setna vaharu indeed.

We have not said that since that night on the Wingly Forest roof, nor shown any large amounts of tenderness. Occasionally we will embrace, I'll give him a kiss, or he'll just hold me, but I don't know, something about it seems off. Oh well…even if no affection is shown, he makes my blood sing in my veins, passion rise, something that Zieg never did. I do not doubt the love I had for Zieg, but it was more a content working-together. He never made me feel the way Lloyd makes me feel.

Bah, getting off topic. After he pulled away, Dart came up. "Mom, what happened?"

"Do you have the Dragon Block Staff?"

He held up something that looks like a lump of wood and metal, unceremoniously crafted. "We got it."

"Good. We'll need it. We were in Deningrad for a while, but then the Divine Dragon attacked. It did much more damage that last time; it destroyed the entire town. The Crystal Palace shattered." I looked over his shoulder at Sacred Sister Miranda. She listened to my words with narrowed eyes and unconcealed hope. "Lives were lost, that I must say. But Shana did her magic thing again. She managed to save the people in the castle and then some. The light…it was like a shield of protection."

I continued to tell them what had happened, describing the shield and how it worked, about how Shana passed out afterwards and the Council discussed what to do. I told them how we split into four groups, heading in different directions, about how the Queen had already commissioned architects and builders to bring Deningrad back to its beauty. For the moment we would have to stay as we were. I saw Miranda's eyes soften when I told her that Luanna was safe, and was loathe to tell her about Setie.

But she asked, and I told her. Her gray eyes hazed over in pain and she gripped a rusty lamppost for balance, swaying. Meru cried out and went to help her. Miranda did not like that, but did not pull away.

"I'm sorry." I told her, knowing more than anyone just how worthless those words are.

She had one hand on the lamppost and the other in a fist. Her head was bowed to her chest and her eyes were squeezed shut in pain. She steeled herself, growling and whimpering. Finally she looked up. "What of Her Majesty? Is Queen Theresa all right?" The expression on her face almost made me cry. She must love Theresa so much. It was an expression that made me think that even if the queen had been injured, I would have lied to ease Miranda.

"Last time I spoke to her, yes. She took a large amount of guards with her and the forest is not so dangerous. She is currently residing in Fueno. I have sent a messenger to her anyway, to request more supplies. You'll have word in a couple of days."

Miranda nodded. "Good work. Where are the people?"

I pointed out the pathway, and she left.

"Shana's all right, Dart. She fainted from the magic, and she doing badly for a while, but she's recovered nicely. She's still a little weak, but she'll be fine in a few days. She's helping Luanna with healing the people. Go to her."

My son ran off, and I asked to speak with Meru. "What happened? Did things go well?"

She grimaced, covered it with a grin. "Sure! I wasn't really all that welcome in the beginning, but we got the Staff, right? We have to kick the Divine Dragon's butt for what he did to the people of Deningrad!"

Now we're resting around a warm campfire, the ten of us. Father and Albert are chatting about something, but mostly it is silent. I have a bit of a headache. We're supposed to be talking about strategy. What are we going to do? We have decided that we are going to stop at Fueno to see the Queen and ask her opinion. We'll fill up supplies, then go to face the Divine Dragon. Lloyd's squirming for some reason. I think he has something to tell us. I'll ask, and write later.

Okay, it is now hour later. I was right. Lloyd had a LOT to tell us. I rested my shoulder against his first, asking him, "What's wrong? You look like you're going to be ill."

He shook his head. "I'm not going to be ill. But there's something that you should probably know. All of you."

So I called the attention of everyone. They listened.

"I was your enemy when we first met, we all know that. But you let me join the team, and I'm glad. But no one asked me what happened before, what I was doing, who I was working for. I was working for Emperor Diaz." That's right of course. But in the excitement of everything we had forgotten. "I don't know how Emperor Diaz, and I really didn't care. I wanted to achieve my dreams of a utopia, and he agreed to help me, because 'we have common goals', he told me. I haven't spoken to him in a while, not since joining this team. I like to think that they're two different lives. One serving someone, carrying out a dream by deadly manners, the other one fighting for justice, with Claire." He conveniently ignored Father's low growl of warning.

"That's not all. He told me to get Shana, which is why I ordered Doel to attack Seles and get her. I was the middleman, conveying orders. I don't know why Diaz wanted Shana, but he said that she was necessary to help. We would ask for her help, not demand it, he told me. She would be safe. But Shana escaped from the prison.

"No matter, Diaz told me. There was still time. Now he sent me to get the Divine Moon Objects. I was to bring them to him, he said, and then he could help me. I have the Moon Gem, Claire has the Moon Dagger, and I know that Queen Theresa has the Moon Mirror. We need to get it from her, with her permission, of course. I think that we have to confront Diaz, to ask him why he wants the Objects and Shana. How are they linked together?"

How? I don't understand. One is living, the others aren't. They're both powerful magically, but that's about it. I don't understand it. My head hurts.

There was silence immediately afterwards. I knew Dart was resentful that Lloyd had not told us this before. When I asked Lloyd, he said it was because he was afraid of what reaction he would get. We might not believe him. Which is basically what happened. Even I have to admit, it sounded like a trap. If Lloyd had only been feigning friendship, this would be an easy way for him to lead us into a trap.

It was only a short while before everyone conquered the fear though. "All right. That's information we would have liked to have a while ago, but thank you for telling us." Dart said. Still resentful, I can always tell with my son. "I know what everyone is thinking, but I trust Lloyd, and not only because my mother does. He's been with us too long. If he wanted to trick us, he had plenty of time to. We may not all be friends here, but we're going to need to be to survive. Trust is important here. Tomorrow, we head to Fueno, to talk to the Queen, then we confront the Dragon. Afterwards, Lloyd can lead us to Diaz. Maybe then we can find the answers that we need."

I certainly hope so. This journey is eternal, one thing leading to another. What have we done so far? Uncovered the truth of the war in Serdio and unraveled it, ended the curse of Tiberoa's king, saved people from a water dragon, stopped bandits from taking over… Each even brought on the next one through things that seemed unlinked, yet it never brought us to the purpose of our journey itself: to find out why Shana was kidnapped from Seles.

Shana is resting now, leaning against Dart, who has an arm around her, much the same fashion of me and Lloyd right now. It's comforting, warmth in the cold.

Lloyd asked me of my life here in Neet, and I told him, quietly. It was strange, to tell him of my husband, but when I was finished, he kissed my forehead and held me. I'm glad for this journey if only for the chance to meet him. But I'm still worried, even now in this brief period of peaceful balance.

Something tells me that things are going to happen soon.