Hey, we're back! 2 reviews on our first chap... *sniffs* we're so touched!
We'd really like to thank Cherie for that review... sorry about the spoiler ^^; we'll try to look out for stuff like that. And we don't know how to put the story in any other format besides Word... *sigh* so kan't help that. We'll pair Neon and Joker just for you, actually, we like that pairing too... hey it rhymes! (Vae: I agree with the corny laptop magical powers comment... it's more fun our way, ne? *shameless bragging*) (Yue: -_-; ) Anyway, glad that you liked our fic, we weren't sure if it was as funny as we would like it to be...
And chaos-wing, thanks for reviewing as well! (Vae: Yue went and paired Raiha and Fuuko without my knowing!!! *wails*) (Yue: She prefers Fuuko/Tokiya heheh...) (Vae: hmph) So anyway, you'll get your pairing, though right now there's not much... action...
And this is not a FY/FoR crossover any more, like we wanted it to be. sigh... so now it's just FoR. Sorry! (actually if you really want a crossover you can tell us... we don't mind!!! It's just that we thought that we hadn't paid too much attention to the FY characters, and that so far we've focused on FoR only... and it's unfair to the FY people)
oh, yes, and we apologize in advance to Yanagi fans... we both don't like her very much... so as u imagine, she's not very... favoured... in this fic, let's just say... but u can complain if u want, and we'll be nicer.
Oh, and one last thing (sorry!) the 1st few chapters don't really focus much on the UBS... it's just a prelude to the real story. So the 1st few chaps are just like 'prologues' to the real story, you can call them 'fillers'... and in the real story, you'll hardly see any mention about us authors... it's FoR all the way!!! Yea!!! ^__^ please, no flames!
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Weird Voice: Hello people! Read the above Author's Notes first! They're important! At least the last 3 paragraphs... And we do not own Flame of Recca or Fushigi Yuugi. They belong to the geniuses Anzai Nobuyuki and Watase Yuu respectively.
Werid Voice: So, anyway. In the last chapter, we see Kukai and Vae running away from a raging rhino - *Yue glares* - ahem, pardon me, a raging Yue. What caused the cheerful author to lose her marbles? *Yue glares x10*
Yue: I've lost my marbles for as long as I can remember.
Weird Voice: Ah, okay, I meant, to lose her cool. So, what caused Yue's fellow idiot - *Yue and Vae glare* - um, wait, that should be fellow author. So anyway, what caused her to scream out a death warning to Kukai, in a voice that sounded like an enraged Kurenai screaming, which means to scream so piercingly that it makes your eardrums *and* all the glass within a thousand miles shatter?
(Kurei appears, calmly flames Weird Voice with the abovementioned screaming enraged Kurenai, and both of them stick their tongues out at the now black and crispy Weird Voice before disappearing)
Yue and Vae: HAH!!! *sticks out tongues too*
Weird Voice: *squeaks* so let the story begin... *dead faint*
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Yue: VAE!!!!!! FREEZE!!!! *suddenly reverts to normal voice* Kukai, you can leave, I don't hurt innocents. *turns back to Vae* DID YOU HEAR ME???!!!!
Vae: *squeaks* I *am* freezing!
Kukai: *placidly* Now, Yue, I'm sure we can find a peaceful solution. *flinches under Yue's death glare* or not...
Vae: Kurei! Help us! *tries to hide behind Kukai who's trying to hide behind Vae* Use Kurenai! Quick!
Kurei: *rubs his head* ow. (he bumped his head remember? ^_^) No, I will not allow my Kurenai to involve herself in petty squabbles like this. I also have a desire to live a little while longer instead of dying at the hands of a crazed female.
Yue: *evil smirk* BWAHAHAHA, no one's gonna save you now, Vae! Accept your punishment! *mad gleam in bloodshot eyes*
Vae: *tries to look brave* punishment for what? Jus 'cuz you forgot Mi- chan's in Hokage doesn't mean you can punish me... *voice gets tinier and tinier till she trails off in a mumble, cowering under Yue's merciless gaze*
Yue: Aw. shaddup. TEME. *stick a finger out at Vae. (And no, children, not *that* finger, tsk tsk, shame on yourselves. And if you don't know what I'm talking about, just remember I often talk to myself so don't mind me.)* ...YOU...YOU... YOU DIDN'T. REMIND. ME. THAT. MY. DEAR. MI-CHAN. IS. IN. HOKAGE. And you still dare say 'what punishment'???!!! *starts swelling like a balloon*
Vae: Hey! I like Mi-chan too! Besides it was your idea so it's your problem that you forgot... *gulps and cowers again, slowly inching away from Yue* On second thought, talking isn't going to help...
(A lightbulb lights up over Vae's head, and she whips out a pin and sticks it in Yue causing her to turn into a chibi-balloon whizzing around in the air screaming vulgarities. Ever tried that before? You just blow up a balloon, don't tie it, and let it go. It makes a loud farting noise... Ok I'll stop crapping now... *Chinese* bú yào ji?ng fèi huà le...)
And then Vae uses the distraction to grab chibi-Kukai's hand and sprint off into the distance, with Kukai bouncing off the ground with every step Vae takes, going 'ow, ow, ow, ow, ow...' and so on. You get the picture. If you don't, too bad.)
Yue: TEME!!!! GET YOUR FREAKING A** BACK HERE!!! Kuso! We lost them! Heck, Kurei, we're going to find the Hokage too!
Kurei: ...
Yue: Ikimasho! *drags Kurei who is currently glaring and sulking*
(At this point, Yue is staggering backward, straining to pull Kurei with her. She bumps into someone and falls face flat on the ground and...)
Yue: WHAT THE FREAK IS THE FREAKIN MATTER WITH MY FREAKIN LUCK TODAY????!!!! Dammit! What in the name of Kami-sama is your problem! Watch where you're going, will - *turns around and faces person she bumped into, ready to kill* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! Raiha!!! *eyes turn into lil' pink hearts* what are you doing here?
Raiha: *Flashes 1000 megawatt grin* to see Kurei-sama of course! I heard something about a battle, and I came to join him once more!
Kurei: So, Yue, do you still wanna find the Hokage... *trails off* Hey - where's she? *spots Yue glomping Raiha a few metres away* Oh. *pouts* no one's listening to me...
Raiha: *cuts in anxiously* Of course I'm listening to your, Kurei-sama! I'm your one and only faithful... *yelps as Yue tries to hug him even harder, which is almost impossible* Erm. *gasps for breath* excuse me, are you single?
Yue: YES!!!!! *starry eyed* I AM!!! *Lets go of Raiha and looks at him with puppy eyes, hand clasped (in what she believes is an adorable way) in front of her*
Raiha: *straightens out his hair and clothes* I can see why. Oops. I mean - you might be single, but I'm not. *Turns beet red* I'm with Fuuko, I'm really sorry, but I will never be unfaithful to her...
Yue: O.O *gapes* you mean, you're going out with Fuuko?
Kurei: That miserable excuse for a girl from the Hokage monkeys? Raiha, I'm surprised at you.
Raiha: Kurei-sama, I respect you, so I formally ask you to please not insult the woman I love; instead of blowing your brains out to prove the point that I will do almost anything for her.
Yue: O.O *Reaaally reaaally wide eyed* He's actually threatening Kureri. he's really serious this time... *HUGE GRIN* YES MAN!!! I KNEW IT!!!!!! There are so many fanfics about you 2, you know? I just love this pairing!!!
(Chibi-Vae pops out)
Vae: FANFICS RULE!!! *victory sign* (disappears again)
Raiha: *sweatdrop* ummm... what was that thing and what's fanfics?
Yue: Uhh... well... that was Vae, oh, yes, and I'm Yue, and nevermind about fanfics... where was I? Oh, yeah... *suddenly remembers* YAY!!!!! *throws confetti and flower petals and glitter around*
Raiha and Kurei:..........
Yue: Ok, then. Since we already have 1 bishounen *drools* here, I doubt we need another. (Vae: heheh. little does she know just how many bishounen I meet... I love my job!) Let's find the Ura Uruha leader! Whatsisname... oh right! Aoi!
(Thus the trio proceeds with their journey to find Aoi, with Yue still throwing confetti and celebrating the news of the Rai/Fuu pairing ^^;)
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Meanwhile, we go back to visit our other nutty author... who's resting under a tree with an irritated Kukai...
Vae: whew! Thank heavens we ran fast enough!
Kukai: *glowering* you mean *you* ran fast... I kept hitting the dirt!!!
Vae: *sweatdrop* sorry, but you don't know how dangerous a crazed Yue is. a crazed Yue is a morbid and hungry Yue... and trust me, that's not a good combination. You know what she'll do? I'll tell you...
*Shadows surround her & she grows ominously bigger, eyes hidden*
Vae: *in a terrifying hiss* Her eyes'll fry you with their laser sharp intensity, her breath will choke you and make your eyes tear up, her hair'll truss you up like a turkey and squeeze the stuffing outta you, her teeth'll grind together and she'll grin this horrible, crazed grin before she lifts you up to her mouth and... *shudders* you don't wanna know... *goes back to normal... or at least, as normal as she can get*
Kukai: O.O Really??!! *actually looks scared*
Vae: No, not really *sheepishly*
(Kukai facevaults)
Vae: The real version's much worse.
(Kukai facevaults *again* and sweatdrops. A really LARGE sweatdrop.)
Vae: *cheerfully* well, onward, my good man!
(She skips off, with Kukai resignedly following her, muttering 'your good man? *Your* good man?)
Kukai: If you don't mind my asking, where do you plan to go?
Vae: Uh, Mi-chan's home?
Kukai: Any particular reason?
Vae: That's where Mi-chan lives!
Kukai: I think that was obvious. God this girl is *dense*.
Vae: well, Kaoru-chan is temporarily living with him there too! *starry eyes* they're both such bishounen! Mi-chan's so cool and Kaoru-chan's so kawaii!!! *pauses* oh, wait for a sec...
(Vae suddenly disappears and reappears three seconds later. on top of Kukai)
Kukai: *Dumps Vae on ground, practically breaking all her bones and mutters to himself* I'm going to go senile much, MUCH earlier than I expected, at this rate. *patiently to Vae* What did you do?
Vae: My women's intuition told me someone was talking about fanfics, so I HAD to pop in and shamelessly cheer fanfics on! FANFICS RULE! FANFICS RULE! FANFICS RULE! *victory sign*
(Kukai wisely decides not to ask about fanfics as that would make Vae start on her 'fanfics rule' chant again... which was very, very annoying)
Kukai: Shall we go?
Vae: YUP!!!
(ten minutes later)
Vae: *whines* I'm tired and my side aches and my feet hurt!
Kukai: Just five more minutes to the city.
Vae: But I'm bored! I can't stand it!
Kukai: Look at the scenery, then.
Vae: The scenery's no fun!
Kukai: Then focus on your goal - it helps, like meditation.
Vae: My goal's too far!
Kukai: -_-; I meant picture it mentally, not look for it physically.
Vae: But I'm too tired and my side aches and my feet hurt!
Kukai: ...... *prays silently* Yuu-sama, please deliver me from this agony quickly and I promise I will be good for the rest of my anime life.
(Finally, four trying - *very* trying - minutes later.)
Vae: WE'RE HERE!!! WE'RE FINALLY HERE!!!
Kukai: (looking heavenward) *Thank* you, Yuu-sama! (to Vae) I assume you know where 'here' is.
Vae: *rolls eyes* the street where Mi-chan lives! Duh!
Kukai: o.O And... Where exactly is his house?
Vae: Uh... *glances at rows of identical - and I mean *IDENTICAL* - bungalows* actually...
Kukai: Remind me *never* to hire a female author as a tour guide.
Vae: Never hire a female author as a tour guide.
Kukai: ... *rubs temples* I suddenly have this pounding headache.
Vae: Hey! I know! It's so quiet here! Let's yell, he's sure to hear us!
Kukai: *Hurriedly* NO!!!
Vae: Oh, right... ^^; I forgot. Authors can't yell or else... *Eyes grow wide with sudden realization* Hey! How about you? You can yell without... uh... side effects, 'cuz you're an anime character!
Kukai: *gravely* Yelling is a sin. It disturbs the peace as well as violates the privacy of others. I will not invade anyone's privacy. The Ku are peaceful unless it is absolutely necessary that we resort to violence.
Vae: *Slyly* Fine... since you won't do it, I will! *opens mouth*
Kukai: NO!!! *claps hand over Vae's mouth* Alright! To chose between the violation of my inner peace and the destruction of the peace in a neighbourhood is hard, but I shall sacrifice myself for the good of all. *mutters something darkly about brats and blackmailers*
Vae: *rubs hands together in wicked glee* Well?
Kukai: Very well. *Sighs* Here goes... *takes a deep breath* MIKAGAMI!!!!!!!!! MAY WE HAVE THE HONOUR OF SEEING YOU NOW???????!!!!!!!!
(A heartbeat of dead silence. Then...)
*Sound of doors slamming open*
Tasuki (we no own Fushigi Yuugi): *Screams* WHO'S THE F*CKIN BASTARD WHO WOKE ME UP!!! RECCA SHINEN!!!
Xing Ling (we no own Celestial Zone, which is not a manga but a Chinese comic): *annoyed* I was cultivating my powers and you made me lose concentration, you - !!!
Misato (we no own Neon Genesis Evangelion): *Screeches* My car! My brand new car! You made me scratch it!!!
Kamui (we no own X either, though I - I'm Vae btw - would dearly love to own Kamui's feather wings. too cool!): *dangerously quiet* You woke Kotori up...
(In a matter of seconds, Kukai was burnt black by Tasuki's tessen, hit on the head by Xing Ling's boomerang, slapped silly by Misato, and blasted to the middle of the road by Kamui.)
*Sound of doors slamming shut*
(A heartbeat of dead silence. Then...)
Kukai: *whispers loudly* KUSO! FREAK & DAMN THOSE ANIME CHARACTERS! WHERE THE HELL DID THEY COME FROM?!
Vae: (who miraculously escaped unharmed) This is anime land! *sniffs disdainfully* of course there are anime characters! *grins evilly* I got to see so two bishounen and two bishoujo... serves Yue right for pairing Raiha with Fuuko without asking me! BWAHAHAHA...
Kukai: ... *starts turning into Demon Kukai*
Vae: Uh oh... *racks brains for idea* Ah hah! *clears throat* Kukai... you have committed a terrible sin. Even worse than turning into a demon and killing people. You should pray to clear your debt to your gods... and as soon as possible, or you might be damned to hell...
Kukai: *back to normal* *suspiciously* what?
Vae: *gravely* you just swore.
Kukai: I did? O.O HOLY SHIT!
(Kukai suddenly turns chibi, his demon self forgotten in panic, as he kneels down in the middle of the road with an altar that mysteriously appeared out of nowhere. He starts chanting prayers in front of the altar, knocking the wooden thingy that priest always use... I forgot its name, it was something like... wooden fish-head? -_-;)
(suddenly a basketball flies toward Kukai)
Sakuragi (we no own Slam Dunk): SHUT THE HELL UP OLD MAN!!!
(Kukai knocked senseless and keels over in middle of road)
Vae: Oh CRAP... *looks frantically around* now what do I do? There's no way I'm gonna give him the mouth to mouth thingy... the bishounen maybe, but not that ugly monk!
Kukai: *lifts head off ground and glares* I'm NOT ugly! *promptly faints again*
Vae: ......
(Just then a silver car screeches to a halt a few metres away from Kukai and Vae)
Mikagami, Koganei and Yanagi: Kukai and the idiot girl author???!!!
Vae: Hey I'm not - *Suddenly realizes who she's talking to and shrieks* MI- CHAN!!! *glomps him* KAORU-CHAN!!! *glomps him too* YANAGI-SAN! *cringes* nevermind.
Yanagi: *spots Kukai* Oh, poor Kukai-sensei! *tears well up in her eyes* He's so badly hurt!
(Yanagi runs to Kukai and heals him while Mikagami and Koganei pick themselves off the road, dazed)
Koganei: *mutters* great. First she dumps me in Mi-chan's house and not Yanagi-neechan's, then makes me suddenly grow as old as Recca-nichan (I hate high school! So much homework! Of course, I'm the heartthrob of the school, but that isn't the point)and now tries to kill me by glomping. Somebody chop off my head and be done with this torture.
Vae: Okay! *Sweetly* *produces a few axes from thin air* Would you like your blade thick, medium or thin? And would you like fries with that?
(everyone blinks)
Vae: ^^; sorry, it just popped out...
(Yanagi walks over with Kukai)
Yanagi: He's healed!
Kukai: So I am. Thank you, Yanagi-san. And it appears Recca is coming. *points to a figure nearing them*
Koganei: *yells in panic to approaching Recca* Don't come any closer, Recca- nichan!!!
Mikagami: *sweatdrop* Too late.
(Alas, for Vae has already flown toward the unsuspecting Recca at lightning speed and is now glomping him enthusiastically. Then she drags a dazed Recca over to the group - which included a speechless, shocked Yanagi)
Vae: there! *dusts hands off* OH, yes, I need to ask you something, Recca. Can you please join our new UBS as Hokage's leader? Show Kurei and his minions that good will always triumph!
Recca: Will we have to sacrifice Yanagi?
Vae: *Uncomfortably* yes...
Everyone except Kukai: *flatly* NO!!!
Vae: *wheedles* Recca... Kurei's joining, too! You still have unresolved problems, right? And Mi-chan, Raiha stole Fuuko away from you, don't you want revenge? Oh, and Kaoru-chan, I know you like someone, don't you? *Kaoru turns beet red* well, this is your chance to show her how strong you are!
Mikagami: I want my friends to be happy, and as long as Fuuko is happy with Raiha, then I'm okay... *not very convincingly, keeping up his moral image*
Koganei: That would just be showing off... *not very convincingly either, listening to his conscience*
Recca: *not very - oh wait. Scratch that. It should be ~ignoring his morals~* Did Kurei want to fight? Who's he sacrificing?
Vae: Oh... Kurei's accepted immediately after he heard he would be fighting you. He's sacrificing Kurenai... the real Kurenai. Not the flame-copy. *thinks to herself in wicked glee* Kurei doesn't even know that he needs a sacrifice... heheh... but the Hokage don't need to know that yet... *speaks aloud again* See? He's taking a risk with his beloved. Are you... *Sly, evil grin* more cowardly than he is? You don't dare to take the risk? (hey that rhymes too!)
All 3 guys: WE ARE NOT COWARDS!!!! FINE!!! WE ACCEPT!!!
Vae: *brightly* Great!
Yanagi: Hey! Don't I have a say in this? Hello? Is anyone *listening* to me? Recca-kun!!!
(Everyone ignores her, too caught up in their own thoughts: how Fuuko is going to be so impressed, how Kurei is going to get what he deserves, etc.)
Kukai: *sighs sadly and shakes his head* you've all been manipulated by that kitsune(vixen)...
Vae: *whapps Kukai* shaddup!
Kukai: That reminds me. Who's our sacrifice?
Vae: *smugly* can't you guess?
Audience member: IT'S MISORA YOU BIG DOPE!!!
Vae: very good!
Kukai: *narrows eyes* wait. My daughter?
Vae: *cheerfully* don't worry, the others are also sacrificing their loved ones.
Kukai: My daughter?
Vae: *loses her smile* well.
Kukai: My *daughter*?
Vae:*finally finding courage* No, I meant Misao from Rurouni Kenshin (which we don't own). Of course it's your daughter, come on, do you hear anyone from the Hokage whining about their sacrifice?
Yanagi: I am!!! *pauses* oh wait. I'm not whining! I'm complaining!
(Nobody listens)
Kukai: Fine, fine *grumbles* But Saicho's not going to be very happy...
Vae: Ask me if I care.
Kukai: Do you care?
Vae: -_-; No.
Kukai: *shrugs* okay.
Vae: *sighs* Okay, everyone, I need Recca and Kukai to come with me to meet up with the other leaders. The rest of you can do whatever you want. Sayonara! I'll be back, Mi-chan and Kaoru-chan!
(Vae grabs chibi-Recca and chibi-Kukai by the backs of their shirts and marches off, with her captives desperately trying to free themselves from her iron grip)
Mikagami and Koganei: *look at each other* Well...
Mikagami: let's go and have some coffee at my house and wait for the monk and monkey to come back.
Koganei: Fine. Hey~ how about Yanagi-neechan? Where'd she go?
Mikagami: *looks around* -_-; there (points)
(Yanagi is standing on the road, staring at Recca being dragged off.)
Yangai: *murmurs sadly* take care, Recca-kun... *brushes a teardrop away*
(the two guys sweatdrop... when suddenly Fuuko pops up in their faces)
Fuuko: Hi!
Mikagami: *stammers* Fuu - Fuu - Fuuko??!! *goes pink*
Koganei: Fuuko-neechan!
Fuuko: Yup! Hey, where's Recca? I thought he was looking for you? And where's Yanagi?
(the two guys point at Yanagi)
Fuuko: Oy! Yanagi! What are you doing?!
Yanagi: *wipes tear off* I was bidding goodbye to Recca, who was dragged off with Kukai by... uh...
Koganei: *~very~ helpfully* The person who glomped Recca, her name's Vae.
(Yanagi bursts into tears)
Fuuko: o.O Someone glomped Recca? No wonder Yanagi's upset! She's never had the courage to do that!
(Yanagi cries even harder)
Fuuko: -_-; Where'd the Vae person and Recca and Kukai go?
Mikagami: The monk and monkey were dragged off by Vae to meet up with Kurei.
Fuuko: O.O Kurei??!! Is it something to do with the rumour of upcoming battle?
Mikagami: It's not a rumour. *blushes slightly when Fuuko looks at him* I - I mean - uh - Vae brought Recca and Kukai to meet with the, um, others leader of the, er, competing teams... *goes pink again and shuts up*
Fuuko: Then... Raiha's going to be wherever Vae's bringing Recca to!!! *BIG grin* I mean... I'd better go and check on Recca... sayonara!!!
(dashes off in the direction which Yanagi was staring at)
Mikagami: Fuuko... *watching her go with longing, sad expression on face*
Koganei: *Snickers* Mi-chan... you're okay with Fuuko and Raiha, huh? *imitates Mikagami's expression, except more exaggerated, with huge starry eyes, and tries to sound lovesick* Fuuko...
Mikagami: -_- *punches Koganei into the sky then pulls a sobbing Yanagi towards his house, muttering about monkeys and his 'sister-look-alike' being as weepy as ever.* Come on, Yanagi, Koganei will find his own way back to my house...
CRAAAAAAAAAASH!!!!
Koganei's voice: YOWCH!!! #$%@&@*%^&@#$^$#*U%*^@$#%^&#&$&@$%&$%*$!!!!!!!
Mikagami: KUSO... I see the fang boy found my house - he literarily landed in it!!!
And now, let us stop groaning at the corny jokes and leave our two bishounen and one resident bishoujo whiner and see what's going on with Yue...
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PHEW!~ Chapter 2 finished at last. This was more of a Vae chapter. ^_^ Anyway, how do you like it? Pls review!!! Onegai. Juz click that button down there... it won't take a long time. *puppy eyes*
Yue: Once again, thanks to our reviewers!!! ^_^ We really appreciate it! *bows* Doumo arigatou gozaimasu!!! The next chapter will probably be mostly about my adventures. Humph. I shall meet more bishounen than Vae. .
Vae: Hey~ *pouts*
Yue: Sorry. been real busy with schoolwork and stuff. Plus my computer crashed. And *all* my files were deleted. For those who do not see the seriousness in this, it means *all* my anime/manga pics, anime songs and other project stuff have all gone - POOF! *sob* So do me a favour, REVIEW!!!
Vae: Yeah. We'll try to make the next chapter more interesting. K, that's all for now. Jaa-ne!~
We'd really like to thank Cherie for that review... sorry about the spoiler ^^; we'll try to look out for stuff like that. And we don't know how to put the story in any other format besides Word... *sigh* so kan't help that. We'll pair Neon and Joker just for you, actually, we like that pairing too... hey it rhymes! (Vae: I agree with the corny laptop magical powers comment... it's more fun our way, ne? *shameless bragging*) (Yue: -_-; ) Anyway, glad that you liked our fic, we weren't sure if it was as funny as we would like it to be...
And chaos-wing, thanks for reviewing as well! (Vae: Yue went and paired Raiha and Fuuko without my knowing!!! *wails*) (Yue: She prefers Fuuko/Tokiya heheh...) (Vae: hmph) So anyway, you'll get your pairing, though right now there's not much... action...
And this is not a FY/FoR crossover any more, like we wanted it to be. sigh... so now it's just FoR. Sorry! (actually if you really want a crossover you can tell us... we don't mind!!! It's just that we thought that we hadn't paid too much attention to the FY characters, and that so far we've focused on FoR only... and it's unfair to the FY people)
oh, yes, and we apologize in advance to Yanagi fans... we both don't like her very much... so as u imagine, she's not very... favoured... in this fic, let's just say... but u can complain if u want, and we'll be nicer.
Oh, and one last thing (sorry!) the 1st few chapters don't really focus much on the UBS... it's just a prelude to the real story. So the 1st few chaps are just like 'prologues' to the real story, you can call them 'fillers'... and in the real story, you'll hardly see any mention about us authors... it's FoR all the way!!! Yea!!! ^__^ please, no flames!
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Weird Voice: Hello people! Read the above Author's Notes first! They're important! At least the last 3 paragraphs... And we do not own Flame of Recca or Fushigi Yuugi. They belong to the geniuses Anzai Nobuyuki and Watase Yuu respectively.
Werid Voice: So, anyway. In the last chapter, we see Kukai and Vae running away from a raging rhino - *Yue glares* - ahem, pardon me, a raging Yue. What caused the cheerful author to lose her marbles? *Yue glares x10*
Yue: I've lost my marbles for as long as I can remember.
Weird Voice: Ah, okay, I meant, to lose her cool. So, what caused Yue's fellow idiot - *Yue and Vae glare* - um, wait, that should be fellow author. So anyway, what caused her to scream out a death warning to Kukai, in a voice that sounded like an enraged Kurenai screaming, which means to scream so piercingly that it makes your eardrums *and* all the glass within a thousand miles shatter?
(Kurei appears, calmly flames Weird Voice with the abovementioned screaming enraged Kurenai, and both of them stick their tongues out at the now black and crispy Weird Voice before disappearing)
Yue and Vae: HAH!!! *sticks out tongues too*
Weird Voice: *squeaks* so let the story begin... *dead faint*
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Yue: VAE!!!!!! FREEZE!!!! *suddenly reverts to normal voice* Kukai, you can leave, I don't hurt innocents. *turns back to Vae* DID YOU HEAR ME???!!!!
Vae: *squeaks* I *am* freezing!
Kukai: *placidly* Now, Yue, I'm sure we can find a peaceful solution. *flinches under Yue's death glare* or not...
Vae: Kurei! Help us! *tries to hide behind Kukai who's trying to hide behind Vae* Use Kurenai! Quick!
Kurei: *rubs his head* ow. (he bumped his head remember? ^_^) No, I will not allow my Kurenai to involve herself in petty squabbles like this. I also have a desire to live a little while longer instead of dying at the hands of a crazed female.
Yue: *evil smirk* BWAHAHAHA, no one's gonna save you now, Vae! Accept your punishment! *mad gleam in bloodshot eyes*
Vae: *tries to look brave* punishment for what? Jus 'cuz you forgot Mi- chan's in Hokage doesn't mean you can punish me... *voice gets tinier and tinier till she trails off in a mumble, cowering under Yue's merciless gaze*
Yue: Aw. shaddup. TEME. *stick a finger out at Vae. (And no, children, not *that* finger, tsk tsk, shame on yourselves. And if you don't know what I'm talking about, just remember I often talk to myself so don't mind me.)* ...YOU...YOU... YOU DIDN'T. REMIND. ME. THAT. MY. DEAR. MI-CHAN. IS. IN. HOKAGE. And you still dare say 'what punishment'???!!! *starts swelling like a balloon*
Vae: Hey! I like Mi-chan too! Besides it was your idea so it's your problem that you forgot... *gulps and cowers again, slowly inching away from Yue* On second thought, talking isn't going to help...
(A lightbulb lights up over Vae's head, and she whips out a pin and sticks it in Yue causing her to turn into a chibi-balloon whizzing around in the air screaming vulgarities. Ever tried that before? You just blow up a balloon, don't tie it, and let it go. It makes a loud farting noise... Ok I'll stop crapping now... *Chinese* bú yào ji?ng fèi huà le...)
And then Vae uses the distraction to grab chibi-Kukai's hand and sprint off into the distance, with Kukai bouncing off the ground with every step Vae takes, going 'ow, ow, ow, ow, ow...' and so on. You get the picture. If you don't, too bad.)
Yue: TEME!!!! GET YOUR FREAKING A** BACK HERE!!! Kuso! We lost them! Heck, Kurei, we're going to find the Hokage too!
Kurei: ...
Yue: Ikimasho! *drags Kurei who is currently glaring and sulking*
(At this point, Yue is staggering backward, straining to pull Kurei with her. She bumps into someone and falls face flat on the ground and...)
Yue: WHAT THE FREAK IS THE FREAKIN MATTER WITH MY FREAKIN LUCK TODAY????!!!! Dammit! What in the name of Kami-sama is your problem! Watch where you're going, will - *turns around and faces person she bumped into, ready to kill* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! Raiha!!! *eyes turn into lil' pink hearts* what are you doing here?
Raiha: *Flashes 1000 megawatt grin* to see Kurei-sama of course! I heard something about a battle, and I came to join him once more!
Kurei: So, Yue, do you still wanna find the Hokage... *trails off* Hey - where's she? *spots Yue glomping Raiha a few metres away* Oh. *pouts* no one's listening to me...
Raiha: *cuts in anxiously* Of course I'm listening to your, Kurei-sama! I'm your one and only faithful... *yelps as Yue tries to hug him even harder, which is almost impossible* Erm. *gasps for breath* excuse me, are you single?
Yue: YES!!!!! *starry eyed* I AM!!! *Lets go of Raiha and looks at him with puppy eyes, hand clasped (in what she believes is an adorable way) in front of her*
Raiha: *straightens out his hair and clothes* I can see why. Oops. I mean - you might be single, but I'm not. *Turns beet red* I'm with Fuuko, I'm really sorry, but I will never be unfaithful to her...
Yue: O.O *gapes* you mean, you're going out with Fuuko?
Kurei: That miserable excuse for a girl from the Hokage monkeys? Raiha, I'm surprised at you.
Raiha: Kurei-sama, I respect you, so I formally ask you to please not insult the woman I love; instead of blowing your brains out to prove the point that I will do almost anything for her.
Yue: O.O *Reaaally reaaally wide eyed* He's actually threatening Kureri. he's really serious this time... *HUGE GRIN* YES MAN!!! I KNEW IT!!!!!! There are so many fanfics about you 2, you know? I just love this pairing!!!
(Chibi-Vae pops out)
Vae: FANFICS RULE!!! *victory sign* (disappears again)
Raiha: *sweatdrop* ummm... what was that thing and what's fanfics?
Yue: Uhh... well... that was Vae, oh, yes, and I'm Yue, and nevermind about fanfics... where was I? Oh, yeah... *suddenly remembers* YAY!!!!! *throws confetti and flower petals and glitter around*
Raiha and Kurei:..........
Yue: Ok, then. Since we already have 1 bishounen *drools* here, I doubt we need another. (Vae: heheh. little does she know just how many bishounen I meet... I love my job!) Let's find the Ura Uruha leader! Whatsisname... oh right! Aoi!
(Thus the trio proceeds with their journey to find Aoi, with Yue still throwing confetti and celebrating the news of the Rai/Fuu pairing ^^;)
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Meanwhile, we go back to visit our other nutty author... who's resting under a tree with an irritated Kukai...
Vae: whew! Thank heavens we ran fast enough!
Kukai: *glowering* you mean *you* ran fast... I kept hitting the dirt!!!
Vae: *sweatdrop* sorry, but you don't know how dangerous a crazed Yue is. a crazed Yue is a morbid and hungry Yue... and trust me, that's not a good combination. You know what she'll do? I'll tell you...
*Shadows surround her & she grows ominously bigger, eyes hidden*
Vae: *in a terrifying hiss* Her eyes'll fry you with their laser sharp intensity, her breath will choke you and make your eyes tear up, her hair'll truss you up like a turkey and squeeze the stuffing outta you, her teeth'll grind together and she'll grin this horrible, crazed grin before she lifts you up to her mouth and... *shudders* you don't wanna know... *goes back to normal... or at least, as normal as she can get*
Kukai: O.O Really??!! *actually looks scared*
Vae: No, not really *sheepishly*
(Kukai facevaults)
Vae: The real version's much worse.
(Kukai facevaults *again* and sweatdrops. A really LARGE sweatdrop.)
Vae: *cheerfully* well, onward, my good man!
(She skips off, with Kukai resignedly following her, muttering 'your good man? *Your* good man?)
Kukai: If you don't mind my asking, where do you plan to go?
Vae: Uh, Mi-chan's home?
Kukai: Any particular reason?
Vae: That's where Mi-chan lives!
Kukai: I think that was obvious. God this girl is *dense*.
Vae: well, Kaoru-chan is temporarily living with him there too! *starry eyes* they're both such bishounen! Mi-chan's so cool and Kaoru-chan's so kawaii!!! *pauses* oh, wait for a sec...
(Vae suddenly disappears and reappears three seconds later. on top of Kukai)
Kukai: *Dumps Vae on ground, practically breaking all her bones and mutters to himself* I'm going to go senile much, MUCH earlier than I expected, at this rate. *patiently to Vae* What did you do?
Vae: My women's intuition told me someone was talking about fanfics, so I HAD to pop in and shamelessly cheer fanfics on! FANFICS RULE! FANFICS RULE! FANFICS RULE! *victory sign*
(Kukai wisely decides not to ask about fanfics as that would make Vae start on her 'fanfics rule' chant again... which was very, very annoying)
Kukai: Shall we go?
Vae: YUP!!!
(ten minutes later)
Vae: *whines* I'm tired and my side aches and my feet hurt!
Kukai: Just five more minutes to the city.
Vae: But I'm bored! I can't stand it!
Kukai: Look at the scenery, then.
Vae: The scenery's no fun!
Kukai: Then focus on your goal - it helps, like meditation.
Vae: My goal's too far!
Kukai: -_-; I meant picture it mentally, not look for it physically.
Vae: But I'm too tired and my side aches and my feet hurt!
Kukai: ...... *prays silently* Yuu-sama, please deliver me from this agony quickly and I promise I will be good for the rest of my anime life.
(Finally, four trying - *very* trying - minutes later.)
Vae: WE'RE HERE!!! WE'RE FINALLY HERE!!!
Kukai: (looking heavenward) *Thank* you, Yuu-sama! (to Vae) I assume you know where 'here' is.
Vae: *rolls eyes* the street where Mi-chan lives! Duh!
Kukai: o.O And... Where exactly is his house?
Vae: Uh... *glances at rows of identical - and I mean *IDENTICAL* - bungalows* actually...
Kukai: Remind me *never* to hire a female author as a tour guide.
Vae: Never hire a female author as a tour guide.
Kukai: ... *rubs temples* I suddenly have this pounding headache.
Vae: Hey! I know! It's so quiet here! Let's yell, he's sure to hear us!
Kukai: *Hurriedly* NO!!!
Vae: Oh, right... ^^; I forgot. Authors can't yell or else... *Eyes grow wide with sudden realization* Hey! How about you? You can yell without... uh... side effects, 'cuz you're an anime character!
Kukai: *gravely* Yelling is a sin. It disturbs the peace as well as violates the privacy of others. I will not invade anyone's privacy. The Ku are peaceful unless it is absolutely necessary that we resort to violence.
Vae: *Slyly* Fine... since you won't do it, I will! *opens mouth*
Kukai: NO!!! *claps hand over Vae's mouth* Alright! To chose between the violation of my inner peace and the destruction of the peace in a neighbourhood is hard, but I shall sacrifice myself for the good of all. *mutters something darkly about brats and blackmailers*
Vae: *rubs hands together in wicked glee* Well?
Kukai: Very well. *Sighs* Here goes... *takes a deep breath* MIKAGAMI!!!!!!!!! MAY WE HAVE THE HONOUR OF SEEING YOU NOW???????!!!!!!!!
(A heartbeat of dead silence. Then...)
*Sound of doors slamming open*
Tasuki (we no own Fushigi Yuugi): *Screams* WHO'S THE F*CKIN BASTARD WHO WOKE ME UP!!! RECCA SHINEN!!!
Xing Ling (we no own Celestial Zone, which is not a manga but a Chinese comic): *annoyed* I was cultivating my powers and you made me lose concentration, you - !!!
Misato (we no own Neon Genesis Evangelion): *Screeches* My car! My brand new car! You made me scratch it!!!
Kamui (we no own X either, though I - I'm Vae btw - would dearly love to own Kamui's feather wings. too cool!): *dangerously quiet* You woke Kotori up...
(In a matter of seconds, Kukai was burnt black by Tasuki's tessen, hit on the head by Xing Ling's boomerang, slapped silly by Misato, and blasted to the middle of the road by Kamui.)
*Sound of doors slamming shut*
(A heartbeat of dead silence. Then...)
Kukai: *whispers loudly* KUSO! FREAK & DAMN THOSE ANIME CHARACTERS! WHERE THE HELL DID THEY COME FROM?!
Vae: (who miraculously escaped unharmed) This is anime land! *sniffs disdainfully* of course there are anime characters! *grins evilly* I got to see so two bishounen and two bishoujo... serves Yue right for pairing Raiha with Fuuko without asking me! BWAHAHAHA...
Kukai: ... *starts turning into Demon Kukai*
Vae: Uh oh... *racks brains for idea* Ah hah! *clears throat* Kukai... you have committed a terrible sin. Even worse than turning into a demon and killing people. You should pray to clear your debt to your gods... and as soon as possible, or you might be damned to hell...
Kukai: *back to normal* *suspiciously* what?
Vae: *gravely* you just swore.
Kukai: I did? O.O HOLY SHIT!
(Kukai suddenly turns chibi, his demon self forgotten in panic, as he kneels down in the middle of the road with an altar that mysteriously appeared out of nowhere. He starts chanting prayers in front of the altar, knocking the wooden thingy that priest always use... I forgot its name, it was something like... wooden fish-head? -_-;)
(suddenly a basketball flies toward Kukai)
Sakuragi (we no own Slam Dunk): SHUT THE HELL UP OLD MAN!!!
(Kukai knocked senseless and keels over in middle of road)
Vae: Oh CRAP... *looks frantically around* now what do I do? There's no way I'm gonna give him the mouth to mouth thingy... the bishounen maybe, but not that ugly monk!
Kukai: *lifts head off ground and glares* I'm NOT ugly! *promptly faints again*
Vae: ......
(Just then a silver car screeches to a halt a few metres away from Kukai and Vae)
Mikagami, Koganei and Yanagi: Kukai and the idiot girl author???!!!
Vae: Hey I'm not - *Suddenly realizes who she's talking to and shrieks* MI- CHAN!!! *glomps him* KAORU-CHAN!!! *glomps him too* YANAGI-SAN! *cringes* nevermind.
Yanagi: *spots Kukai* Oh, poor Kukai-sensei! *tears well up in her eyes* He's so badly hurt!
(Yanagi runs to Kukai and heals him while Mikagami and Koganei pick themselves off the road, dazed)
Koganei: *mutters* great. First she dumps me in Mi-chan's house and not Yanagi-neechan's, then makes me suddenly grow as old as Recca-nichan (I hate high school! So much homework! Of course, I'm the heartthrob of the school, but that isn't the point)and now tries to kill me by glomping. Somebody chop off my head and be done with this torture.
Vae: Okay! *Sweetly* *produces a few axes from thin air* Would you like your blade thick, medium or thin? And would you like fries with that?
(everyone blinks)
Vae: ^^; sorry, it just popped out...
(Yanagi walks over with Kukai)
Yanagi: He's healed!
Kukai: So I am. Thank you, Yanagi-san. And it appears Recca is coming. *points to a figure nearing them*
Koganei: *yells in panic to approaching Recca* Don't come any closer, Recca- nichan!!!
Mikagami: *sweatdrop* Too late.
(Alas, for Vae has already flown toward the unsuspecting Recca at lightning speed and is now glomping him enthusiastically. Then she drags a dazed Recca over to the group - which included a speechless, shocked Yanagi)
Vae: there! *dusts hands off* OH, yes, I need to ask you something, Recca. Can you please join our new UBS as Hokage's leader? Show Kurei and his minions that good will always triumph!
Recca: Will we have to sacrifice Yanagi?
Vae: *Uncomfortably* yes...
Everyone except Kukai: *flatly* NO!!!
Vae: *wheedles* Recca... Kurei's joining, too! You still have unresolved problems, right? And Mi-chan, Raiha stole Fuuko away from you, don't you want revenge? Oh, and Kaoru-chan, I know you like someone, don't you? *Kaoru turns beet red* well, this is your chance to show her how strong you are!
Mikagami: I want my friends to be happy, and as long as Fuuko is happy with Raiha, then I'm okay... *not very convincingly, keeping up his moral image*
Koganei: That would just be showing off... *not very convincingly either, listening to his conscience*
Recca: *not very - oh wait. Scratch that. It should be ~ignoring his morals~* Did Kurei want to fight? Who's he sacrificing?
Vae: Oh... Kurei's accepted immediately after he heard he would be fighting you. He's sacrificing Kurenai... the real Kurenai. Not the flame-copy. *thinks to herself in wicked glee* Kurei doesn't even know that he needs a sacrifice... heheh... but the Hokage don't need to know that yet... *speaks aloud again* See? He's taking a risk with his beloved. Are you... *Sly, evil grin* more cowardly than he is? You don't dare to take the risk? (hey that rhymes too!)
All 3 guys: WE ARE NOT COWARDS!!!! FINE!!! WE ACCEPT!!!
Vae: *brightly* Great!
Yanagi: Hey! Don't I have a say in this? Hello? Is anyone *listening* to me? Recca-kun!!!
(Everyone ignores her, too caught up in their own thoughts: how Fuuko is going to be so impressed, how Kurei is going to get what he deserves, etc.)
Kukai: *sighs sadly and shakes his head* you've all been manipulated by that kitsune(vixen)...
Vae: *whapps Kukai* shaddup!
Kukai: That reminds me. Who's our sacrifice?
Vae: *smugly* can't you guess?
Audience member: IT'S MISORA YOU BIG DOPE!!!
Vae: very good!
Kukai: *narrows eyes* wait. My daughter?
Vae: *cheerfully* don't worry, the others are also sacrificing their loved ones.
Kukai: My daughter?
Vae: *loses her smile* well.
Kukai: My *daughter*?
Vae:*finally finding courage* No, I meant Misao from Rurouni Kenshin (which we don't own). Of course it's your daughter, come on, do you hear anyone from the Hokage whining about their sacrifice?
Yanagi: I am!!! *pauses* oh wait. I'm not whining! I'm complaining!
(Nobody listens)
Kukai: Fine, fine *grumbles* But Saicho's not going to be very happy...
Vae: Ask me if I care.
Kukai: Do you care?
Vae: -_-; No.
Kukai: *shrugs* okay.
Vae: *sighs* Okay, everyone, I need Recca and Kukai to come with me to meet up with the other leaders. The rest of you can do whatever you want. Sayonara! I'll be back, Mi-chan and Kaoru-chan!
(Vae grabs chibi-Recca and chibi-Kukai by the backs of their shirts and marches off, with her captives desperately trying to free themselves from her iron grip)
Mikagami and Koganei: *look at each other* Well...
Mikagami: let's go and have some coffee at my house and wait for the monk and monkey to come back.
Koganei: Fine. Hey~ how about Yanagi-neechan? Where'd she go?
Mikagami: *looks around* -_-; there (points)
(Yanagi is standing on the road, staring at Recca being dragged off.)
Yangai: *murmurs sadly* take care, Recca-kun... *brushes a teardrop away*
(the two guys sweatdrop... when suddenly Fuuko pops up in their faces)
Fuuko: Hi!
Mikagami: *stammers* Fuu - Fuu - Fuuko??!! *goes pink*
Koganei: Fuuko-neechan!
Fuuko: Yup! Hey, where's Recca? I thought he was looking for you? And where's Yanagi?
(the two guys point at Yanagi)
Fuuko: Oy! Yanagi! What are you doing?!
Yanagi: *wipes tear off* I was bidding goodbye to Recca, who was dragged off with Kukai by... uh...
Koganei: *~very~ helpfully* The person who glomped Recca, her name's Vae.
(Yanagi bursts into tears)
Fuuko: o.O Someone glomped Recca? No wonder Yanagi's upset! She's never had the courage to do that!
(Yanagi cries even harder)
Fuuko: -_-; Where'd the Vae person and Recca and Kukai go?
Mikagami: The monk and monkey were dragged off by Vae to meet up with Kurei.
Fuuko: O.O Kurei??!! Is it something to do with the rumour of upcoming battle?
Mikagami: It's not a rumour. *blushes slightly when Fuuko looks at him* I - I mean - uh - Vae brought Recca and Kukai to meet with the, um, others leader of the, er, competing teams... *goes pink again and shuts up*
Fuuko: Then... Raiha's going to be wherever Vae's bringing Recca to!!! *BIG grin* I mean... I'd better go and check on Recca... sayonara!!!
(dashes off in the direction which Yanagi was staring at)
Mikagami: Fuuko... *watching her go with longing, sad expression on face*
Koganei: *Snickers* Mi-chan... you're okay with Fuuko and Raiha, huh? *imitates Mikagami's expression, except more exaggerated, with huge starry eyes, and tries to sound lovesick* Fuuko...
Mikagami: -_- *punches Koganei into the sky then pulls a sobbing Yanagi towards his house, muttering about monkeys and his 'sister-look-alike' being as weepy as ever.* Come on, Yanagi, Koganei will find his own way back to my house...
CRAAAAAAAAAASH!!!!
Koganei's voice: YOWCH!!! #$%@&@*%^&@#$^$#*U%*^@$#%^&#&$&@$%&$%*$!!!!!!!
Mikagami: KUSO... I see the fang boy found my house - he literarily landed in it!!!
And now, let us stop groaning at the corny jokes and leave our two bishounen and one resident bishoujo whiner and see what's going on with Yue...
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PHEW!~ Chapter 2 finished at last. This was more of a Vae chapter. ^_^ Anyway, how do you like it? Pls review!!! Onegai. Juz click that button down there... it won't take a long time. *puppy eyes*
Yue: Once again, thanks to our reviewers!!! ^_^ We really appreciate it! *bows* Doumo arigatou gozaimasu!!! The next chapter will probably be mostly about my adventures. Humph. I shall meet more bishounen than Vae. .
Vae: Hey~ *pouts*
Yue: Sorry. been real busy with schoolwork and stuff. Plus my computer crashed. And *all* my files were deleted. For those who do not see the seriousness in this, it means *all* my anime/manga pics, anime songs and other project stuff have all gone - POOF! *sob* So do me a favour, REVIEW!!!
Vae: Yeah. We'll try to make the next chapter more interesting. K, that's all for now. Jaa-ne!~