Day 4
In the Dark-Fire Cave...
Firesite and Darkone finally, after much struggling and a couple of hernias, finally... get Redman back upright.
DARKONE: There... now stop trying to roll down that stupid ramp... use the fucking elevator.
FIRESITE: Well... our dish is finished, save for one... JUST ONE KEY INGREDIENT!!!
REDMAN: Oregano?
(Darkone smacks Redman)
DARKONE: Shut up!
FIREONE: We need the toenail of the dreaded SoopDragon. Then... no matter what... all those fools will think that our dish is the greatest in the world.
DARKONE: And at that party that is but three months away, we will win the competition.
REDMAN: And win the one billion Dollars
(Firesite smacks Redman)
FIRESITE: Shut up!
DARKONE: And with the winnings we can buy that Satellite Laser system and take over the world!
FIRESITE: Yes... I will... uh... we will be rulers of the world.
DARKONE: Well... let's get rolling.
***Cut scene
High on a mountaintop in Tibet...
DREAMER: Whoa... how the hell did you get here?
NOS: Hell if I know... I asked the writer to kill me off, but you know how it is with Soap Operas, no one really dies. The one thing I can't understand is how people can actually get into these stupid things. But given the average intellectual level of the populous, I can see how these things are the perfect thing for them to use to escape into to forget about life for a few hours a day. God knows it is easier to just sit and breathe than actually use your brain and try to improve yourself. Although lately I have noticed myself slipping into the abyss of apathy and just throwing my hands in the air and joining these fools. Then I enter into a pit of self- loathing, finding out that I hate myself for giving into the temptations of laziness and ineptness.
DREAMER: Uh... dude... chill out... here... take a puff of this.
NOS: Thanks.
DREAMER: Hagan Das???
***Cut Scene
PUFFY: ... and this is a trick I learned at band camp...
BEASTIEGIRL: I got an idea... how about we impale your stupid ass on the flag...
TYLER DURDEN: Hey... have you seen my bong around here?
CPK: FUuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!
***Cut Scene
D's Kitchen
Blowinup is now hanging in the same manner as Pat... without the ball gag
BLOWINUP: ... but seriously, how long would it take to upgrade the thing?
PAT: MMMPpHHHHLLppHHHHHBBBT
BLOWINUP: We'll if you need someone to show you since you don't know how to do it... I can do it and go through it slowly step by step so you can understand it.
PAT: GRRRR... PPPHHBBBTTLLLTT
BLOWINUP: I can also fix all that other stuff you screwed up. It wouldn't take me that long... I am that good.
D: Ahhhh... I love when my playthings get along so well.
***Cut scene
Police headquarters...
The part of the Detective will be played by CnM.
CNM: You sick piece of trash... he was only seven and you tried to touch his penis.
FONGOUL: But he said he was twenty-one.
*** Cut Scene
Krystahl's Beauty Shoppe
(OleBitch pushes GlennGlow out of the way)
OLEBITCH: Oh Lordy... that is the sorriest rat's nest OleBitch ever did see. What you need is some grade A OleBitch Servicing and Beauty Care.
JEEZUS: Uh... I normally go to KryStahl to have my hair worked on.
OLEBITCH: OleBitch here can run circles around that limp wristed wise ass.
JEEZUS: No really... nothing personal, but I'll wait for Krystahl.
OLEBITCH: OleBitch here is gonna whoop your ass.
(Krystahl enters through the backdoor)
[The part of Krystahl will be played by Harvey Firestien.]
Krystahl: Ooooooh Dahlink, I came as soon as I hoid! I think I have just the thing for you... please... come to my special operating room.
***Cut scene
Spinner's Diner
(Ttony and RJ are enjoying a dish that Spinner has prepared while Joey and C-Bring are playing patty-cakes)
TTONY: Dis is good.
RJ: I hope that cybernetic eye that I made for Joey will help him deal with the fact that he lost an eye in the gunfight that we had in Spinner's garden.
TTONY: OK... so's I'm gonna make youse an offah, and I hopes... for yours sake, dat you says yes.
SPINNER: You want to join forces and use my cooking talents and your ruthless disregard for human life to eliminate and obliterate the competition then split the prize money on a 60 40 division with you guys taking the higher percentage.
RJ: Wow
TTONY: How'd youse know dat?
C-BRING: Mastah is smaht
JOEY: AAAAAAAahhahahahaa... no she isn't... I told her while I was looking at her boobs when she was holding the gauze over my eye.
SPINNER: We can have a deal if I get the 60 percent... after all... it is my dish that will take the prize.
TTONY: We'll talk lata... pass me a biscuit!
*** Cut scene
On the Space station:
BATONRUDE: Well... this is probably like every other event that Fu has put together... everyone else does all the work and he collects all the cash at the door. Then he gives the winner a billion dollars... but I bet he does something like giving the winner a billion dollars worth of half off coupons at the King Fu Ice Cream Shoppe, so that he can profit further from the winner. By the way... did you hear my new game on the radio... It's on the Philips Phile at about five o'clock on Tuesdays.
DARTH: Philips is a washed up has been that only plays stupid games to fill four hours.
EKG: You guys want to see Grumpy* bend over again???
VICTORIA: Nah... I think I'm going to head down to the XL wing and talk to the dweebs.
***Cut Scene
In a cave somewhere on the side of a mountain...
LILBIT: I hope you don't mind but I poured some tequila in the mixture.
SOUTHERNGIRL: Sometimes I wish you were not my sister.
LILBIT: Want a truffle?
SOUTHERNGIRL: Stop fooling around... I've fixed everything that you forgot for the stew... but we are still missing one special ingredient.
LILBIT: Uh Oh...
SOUTHERNGIRL: Yep... a lock of hair from the Dreaded SoopDragon.
LILBIT: eeeeeeeewwwww...
SOUTHERNGIRL: Let's get going!
(Commercial break)
In the Dark-Fire Cave...
Firesite and Darkone finally, after much struggling and a couple of hernias, finally... get Redman back upright.
DARKONE: There... now stop trying to roll down that stupid ramp... use the fucking elevator.
FIRESITE: Well... our dish is finished, save for one... JUST ONE KEY INGREDIENT!!!
REDMAN: Oregano?
(Darkone smacks Redman)
DARKONE: Shut up!
FIREONE: We need the toenail of the dreaded SoopDragon. Then... no matter what... all those fools will think that our dish is the greatest in the world.
DARKONE: And at that party that is but three months away, we will win the competition.
REDMAN: And win the one billion Dollars
(Firesite smacks Redman)
FIRESITE: Shut up!
DARKONE: And with the winnings we can buy that Satellite Laser system and take over the world!
FIRESITE: Yes... I will... uh... we will be rulers of the world.
DARKONE: Well... let's get rolling.
***Cut scene
High on a mountaintop in Tibet...
DREAMER: Whoa... how the hell did you get here?
NOS: Hell if I know... I asked the writer to kill me off, but you know how it is with Soap Operas, no one really dies. The one thing I can't understand is how people can actually get into these stupid things. But given the average intellectual level of the populous, I can see how these things are the perfect thing for them to use to escape into to forget about life for a few hours a day. God knows it is easier to just sit and breathe than actually use your brain and try to improve yourself. Although lately I have noticed myself slipping into the abyss of apathy and just throwing my hands in the air and joining these fools. Then I enter into a pit of self- loathing, finding out that I hate myself for giving into the temptations of laziness and ineptness.
DREAMER: Uh... dude... chill out... here... take a puff of this.
NOS: Thanks.
DREAMER: Hagan Das???
***Cut Scene
PUFFY: ... and this is a trick I learned at band camp...
BEASTIEGIRL: I got an idea... how about we impale your stupid ass on the flag...
TYLER DURDEN: Hey... have you seen my bong around here?
CPK: FUuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!
***Cut Scene
D's Kitchen
Blowinup is now hanging in the same manner as Pat... without the ball gag
BLOWINUP: ... but seriously, how long would it take to upgrade the thing?
PAT: MMMPpHHHHLLppHHHHHBBBT
BLOWINUP: We'll if you need someone to show you since you don't know how to do it... I can do it and go through it slowly step by step so you can understand it.
PAT: GRRRR... PPPHHBBBTTLLLTT
BLOWINUP: I can also fix all that other stuff you screwed up. It wouldn't take me that long... I am that good.
D: Ahhhh... I love when my playthings get along so well.
***Cut scene
Police headquarters...
The part of the Detective will be played by CnM.
CNM: You sick piece of trash... he was only seven and you tried to touch his penis.
FONGOUL: But he said he was twenty-one.
*** Cut Scene
Krystahl's Beauty Shoppe
(OleBitch pushes GlennGlow out of the way)
OLEBITCH: Oh Lordy... that is the sorriest rat's nest OleBitch ever did see. What you need is some grade A OleBitch Servicing and Beauty Care.
JEEZUS: Uh... I normally go to KryStahl to have my hair worked on.
OLEBITCH: OleBitch here can run circles around that limp wristed wise ass.
JEEZUS: No really... nothing personal, but I'll wait for Krystahl.
OLEBITCH: OleBitch here is gonna whoop your ass.
(Krystahl enters through the backdoor)
[The part of Krystahl will be played by Harvey Firestien.]
Krystahl: Ooooooh Dahlink, I came as soon as I hoid! I think I have just the thing for you... please... come to my special operating room.
***Cut scene
Spinner's Diner
(Ttony and RJ are enjoying a dish that Spinner has prepared while Joey and C-Bring are playing patty-cakes)
TTONY: Dis is good.
RJ: I hope that cybernetic eye that I made for Joey will help him deal with the fact that he lost an eye in the gunfight that we had in Spinner's garden.
TTONY: OK... so's I'm gonna make youse an offah, and I hopes... for yours sake, dat you says yes.
SPINNER: You want to join forces and use my cooking talents and your ruthless disregard for human life to eliminate and obliterate the competition then split the prize money on a 60 40 division with you guys taking the higher percentage.
RJ: Wow
TTONY: How'd youse know dat?
C-BRING: Mastah is smaht
JOEY: AAAAAAAahhahahahaa... no she isn't... I told her while I was looking at her boobs when she was holding the gauze over my eye.
SPINNER: We can have a deal if I get the 60 percent... after all... it is my dish that will take the prize.
TTONY: We'll talk lata... pass me a biscuit!
*** Cut scene
On the Space station:
BATONRUDE: Well... this is probably like every other event that Fu has put together... everyone else does all the work and he collects all the cash at the door. Then he gives the winner a billion dollars... but I bet he does something like giving the winner a billion dollars worth of half off coupons at the King Fu Ice Cream Shoppe, so that he can profit further from the winner. By the way... did you hear my new game on the radio... It's on the Philips Phile at about five o'clock on Tuesdays.
DARTH: Philips is a washed up has been that only plays stupid games to fill four hours.
EKG: You guys want to see Grumpy* bend over again???
VICTORIA: Nah... I think I'm going to head down to the XL wing and talk to the dweebs.
***Cut Scene
In a cave somewhere on the side of a mountain...
LILBIT: I hope you don't mind but I poured some tequila in the mixture.
SOUTHERNGIRL: Sometimes I wish you were not my sister.
LILBIT: Want a truffle?
SOUTHERNGIRL: Stop fooling around... I've fixed everything that you forgot for the stew... but we are still missing one special ingredient.
LILBIT: Uh Oh...
SOUTHERNGIRL: Yep... a lock of hair from the Dreaded SoopDragon.
LILBIT: eeeeeeeewwwww...
SOUTHERNGIRL: Let's get going!
(Commercial break)