Chapter One
Trip was sitting by himself in the mess hall, prodding the pasta dish Chef had concocted, he didn't feel like eating, all he could think about was T'Pol, his mind seemed to ache, how ever much he tried not to think about her it was constantly on his mind. "Oh, T'Pol" he sighed under his breath. He looked up as to his surprise she'd had just walked in, she said something softly to a waiter then looked over in Trip's direction, she glanced into his eyes and walked over to him.
"Good afternoon, Commander" she said in an uncharacteristically cheerful voice, "Not hungry?"
Trip looked up and couldn't help but look into her eyes, he smiled and almost laughed, seeing her just filled him joy, "Just I..., a lot on my mind, that's all. You Joining me?" he said softly. T'Pol nodded and sat down opposite him at that moment a waiter came to the table with a dish and a cup of Hot Chocolate. Trip eyed the food, "Um, what's that?"
"Vulcan mollusks sautéed in Rhombolian butter" T'Pol said rather proudly, then she noticed the odd look on Trip's face, "It is high in protein and carbohydrates"
Trip gave a quick nod, "Umm, looks very tasty too! Chef whipped that up quick!" he said with a smile. He watched as T'Pol played with the dish, trying to a full fork full of the dish. T'Pol then looked up and raised the fort toward Trip, she lifted a single eyebrow.
"I think you'll find it's very pleasant" T'Pol said. Trip looked into T'Pol's eyes, he was quite surprised, but he opened his mouth as T'Pol slowly put the fork into his mouth, she slower pulled the fork away as trip closed his mouth, he chewed the food while still looking at T'Pol, "Well, Commander?"
"Beautiful" he said with a smile, at that moment T'Pol took a sip of her Hot Chocolate, as she lowered her cup Trip noticed there was some cream on her upper lip, "You've got some." her raised his eyebrows and pointed his head toward her lip. T'Pol just raised a single eyebrow and gave Trip a confused look. "Here" he then picked up his napkin and slowly wiped the cream off her lip, they both looked into each others eyes. Trip felt all the muscles in his face relax. This was the most beautiful moment of his life, he felt a level of comfort he'd never felt before, he appreciated and loved. All this from an emotionless Vulcan? All he could think about was how much he desired her, how much he wanted to hold her in his arms, but he could never have her the way he desired. It felt like T'Pol was teasing him, getting close to him, yet keeping out of reach. He's attraction to her was so strong that he couldn't imagine that she didn't feel the same yet he knew that her Vulcan teachings would never allow for her to feel for him what he felt for her, if she did she would never act on her feelings, she wouldn't be capable of it. Trip gave a slight smile and sighed, "I've got to go now T'Pol, late for my shift" He looked her in the eyes, hoping to get a smile or some emotional response.
T'Pol looked back at Trip, she gave a slight and friendly smile, "It was good seeing you Commander" They both looked each other in the eyes for a couple of seconds before Trip smiled and walked off. As he passed through the Messhall door his dropped his jaw and gave and exaggerated expression of surprise.
"Oh for God's sake Trip, she's Vulcan, she can't be attracted to me!" Trip quietly shouted to himself, it late at night and he couldn't sleep, all that was on his mind was the smile she gave earlier in the day, "Vulcans don't smile, why'd she smile? Damn it Trip, why the fuck are you speaking to yourself?" He just couldn't get her out of his mind, he felt like it was all he'd thought about all day, every second it was on his mind. All he wanted was to see her again, "Just go to sleep Trip, just go to sleep!"
T'Pol entered sickbay with an uncharacteristic grin on her face, "Good morning Doctor!"
"Ah! Sub-commander, how are you?" Phlox said cheerfully
"I've been having trouble sleeping"
"If you lay right on the edge of your bed, you'll soon drop off" Phlox joked, with a proud grin on his face, but T'Pol just responded with a raised eyebrow.
"I've also been suffering with a slight headache"
Phlox picked up an odd looking instrument and pointed it at T'Pol's head, he gave a slightly confused look, "Umm, interesting. How long has it been since you've meditated?"
"12 days" She said hesitantly. T'Pol noticed the concerned look Phlox now giving her "I've been unable to clear my mind"
"Anything the matter?"
"I'd rather not discuss it, well I'm running late Doctor, I have to go" She snapped aggressively." The doctor was very worried by this uncharacteristic seemingly emotional outburst.
Trip was in the messhall randomly tapping through the personal files, unware of Archer standing behind him. As he scanned through the various files, a picture of T'Pol came up covering the entire screen. All he could do was lean back and gaze lovingly at the picture.
"Trip?" Laughed the captain, jumping suddenly at the sound of the captain's voice, he quickly slammed the pad face down on the table.
Turning around slowly he, he felt a sudden rush of heat to his face, feeling embarrassed, his face went red. The captain regarded him quizzically, "Ah, hey Cap'n, I was just."
"Just?" the captain replied with a smiled.
"Would you like to join me Captain?" Trip said nervously, trying to change the subject.
"We're gonna have a Vulcan ambassador onboard in a couple of days, I came down to talk to chef about cooking a special dinner."
"What does the high command want now?"
"We're just transporting him to a planet, of course they're not telling us what for!"
T'Pol came in, she walk over toward Trip and the captain, "Good afternoon Captain, Trip"
Archer gave T'Pol a confused look, "Trip? That's very informal for you Sub- commander?"
"Would you prefer me to refer to all the crew by their rank, Captain?" T'Pol said in her usually emotionless Vulcan way.
"No, no, it's fine" The joked with a smile, "Anyway, I've gotta talk to chef. Try to have fun you two"
T'Pol sat down opposite Trip, he gave her a slight smile and said, "So, Sub- commander, why do you call me Trip?"
"I consider you my friend, Trip, is if not custom among humans to call your friends by their names?"
"Wow, thanks T'Pol, that means a lot" Trip replied with a surprised look on his face. "So, is anything you want, I was thinking Pasta."
"Pasta sounds good to me" T'Pol said in a happy almost childlike voice, but without showing any physical signs of emotion at all. As Trip walked off, T'Pol picked up the padd he'd left on the table, it took her a couple of seconds to realize what it was she was seeing, it was a picture of her across the entire screen of the pad, why would Trip be looking at her personal file? She didn't know whether to put the pad back down on the table or let Trip know she'd seen it. She quickly put the padd back down. At that moment Trip came back with two cups of Cappuccino, "Thank you, Commander"
T'Pol felt very uncomfortable that Trip had been in her personal files, it instantly struck her that he might be developing romantic feelings toward her. Trip gave T'Pol a sweet smile, "So, how have you been?"
"Good, Commander" T'Pol replied in her normal cold Vulcan way
"Whatever happened to 'Trip'?" The commander joked
"I would prefer to only call you Commander around the crew, as your superior officer it would not appropriate for me to treat you any different any other member of the crew" T'Pol replied coldly
"Um, Okay!" Trip replied suspiciously, "T'Pol, we both have tomorrow evening off, there is a showing of 'Revenge of the Killer Creature Alpha Centauri'" Trip paused and laughed as T'Pol raised an eyebrow, "Um, just wondering you'd be willin' to join me?"
"I'm seing Crewman Hans tomorrow evening" T'Pol said in cold voice. She knew that if Trip did have romantic feelings toward her that this would effect him, but she knew she'd been giving him signs all week that she felt the same way toward him. But did she? She'd never felt like this toward anyone else before, she'd never allowed herself too, she kept her feeling strictly under her own control, but with Trip, it just felt too right, it felt like this is something she'd be incomplete not pursuing, she felt complete fulfillment and satisfaction in his company. But she felt it would never work, not aboard Enterprise, this was exploration for the benefit of Human kind, this wasn't her life, it was just a mission, her job and Trip was a colleague.
"It's alright T'Pol, I'll go with Malcolm or someone, it's no big deal" Trip uttered with obvious disappointment. "What are you doin' with Hans?"
"Dinner, apparently." She said feeling sorry for Trip, but she felt the need to back away from him, she had no idea how to be in a relationship, how she to react, what she'd need to do, she also faced possible dismissal from the High Command, a Vulcan-Human relationship was unheard of and interspecies relationships were taboo in Human culture.
Trip looked obviously shocked, his mouth suddenly went dry. He was so sure that if T'Pol would ever go on a date, that she would choose him. Who was Crewman Hans anyway? How does T'Pol know him? How long have they known each other? Is this serious? Trip had no idea what to say, although T'Pol was Vulcan, the feelings he had for her were so strong, he's couldn't imagine life without her, life without the chance of them being together. "Good for you T'Pol, so who's the lucky guy?" he said trying to sound pleased for the Sub-commander, but it his disappointment came across loud and clear.
"Crewman Daniel Hans, we worked together on the away mission aboard the Alien vessel last week. He asked me to dinner, said he enjoyed my company."
"You do realize he's asked you on a date?"
"It's dinner, Commander."
"Well, along as that's all it is"
"There is no reason why I couldn't pursue a relationship with Crewman Hans, is there commander?" she was actually hoping that Trip would admit his feelings for her, at least that way she would be sure. She wanted to tell him how she felt, although she was unsure and worried about failure, she needed to express herself, holding it in wasn't helping.
"You're Vulcan, you don't have relationships, do you?"
"Vulcans are affected by 'attraction' as much as humans, commander. Vulcan marriages are arranged at birth, I'm no longer arranged to be married with my husband, therefore it is my choice who I choice to attach myself to."
"And you think Crewman Hans is. 'Right', I mean is he your kinda guy?"
"Is it not the point of a date to find that out?"
"Do you think something could happen with this guy?"
"It's only dinner commander"
"Be sure to tell me how it goes"
"I will commander"
A waiter came over and placed two dishes on the table, after hearing about T'Pol's date, Trip didn't feel much like eating, he couldn't understand why T'Pol wouldn't be attracted to him, she showed all the signs. What did this guy have that he didn't? What could he give her that Trip couldn't? Trip pulled one of the dished toward him as T'Pol did the same, T'Pol looked quite baffled as to what it was, she looked up at Trip, "Lasagna" he said cheerfully, still trying to cover up his disappointment. He noticed the padd on the table, realizing he'd left the picture of T'Pol onscreen he picked it up, tapped a few keys and placed it face up on the table. He took his fork and started to play with his food. After hearing what T'Pol had told him, he'd completely lost his appetite but he didn't want T'Pol to suspect anything so he took a mouthful and started to force feed himself.
T'Pol herself had lost her appetite, she had realized she did have feelings for Trip, she knew they could never have a relationship onboard Enterprise, but what had she done? She just told Trip she was open to a relationship with a crewmember on Enterprise, this might prevent Trip from trying to get closer to her for a few weeks, but when he realizes her and Hans won't ever be together he's surely going to try for T'Pol again! It was obvious he was deeply attracted to her. She'd dug herself into this hole and she was the only one who could get herself out of it, but she had no clue how.
Trip was sitting by himself in the mess hall, prodding the pasta dish Chef had concocted, he didn't feel like eating, all he could think about was T'Pol, his mind seemed to ache, how ever much he tried not to think about her it was constantly on his mind. "Oh, T'Pol" he sighed under his breath. He looked up as to his surprise she'd had just walked in, she said something softly to a waiter then looked over in Trip's direction, she glanced into his eyes and walked over to him.
"Good afternoon, Commander" she said in an uncharacteristically cheerful voice, "Not hungry?"
Trip looked up and couldn't help but look into her eyes, he smiled and almost laughed, seeing her just filled him joy, "Just I..., a lot on my mind, that's all. You Joining me?" he said softly. T'Pol nodded and sat down opposite him at that moment a waiter came to the table with a dish and a cup of Hot Chocolate. Trip eyed the food, "Um, what's that?"
"Vulcan mollusks sautéed in Rhombolian butter" T'Pol said rather proudly, then she noticed the odd look on Trip's face, "It is high in protein and carbohydrates"
Trip gave a quick nod, "Umm, looks very tasty too! Chef whipped that up quick!" he said with a smile. He watched as T'Pol played with the dish, trying to a full fork full of the dish. T'Pol then looked up and raised the fort toward Trip, she lifted a single eyebrow.
"I think you'll find it's very pleasant" T'Pol said. Trip looked into T'Pol's eyes, he was quite surprised, but he opened his mouth as T'Pol slowly put the fork into his mouth, she slower pulled the fork away as trip closed his mouth, he chewed the food while still looking at T'Pol, "Well, Commander?"
"Beautiful" he said with a smile, at that moment T'Pol took a sip of her Hot Chocolate, as she lowered her cup Trip noticed there was some cream on her upper lip, "You've got some." her raised his eyebrows and pointed his head toward her lip. T'Pol just raised a single eyebrow and gave Trip a confused look. "Here" he then picked up his napkin and slowly wiped the cream off her lip, they both looked into each others eyes. Trip felt all the muscles in his face relax. This was the most beautiful moment of his life, he felt a level of comfort he'd never felt before, he appreciated and loved. All this from an emotionless Vulcan? All he could think about was how much he desired her, how much he wanted to hold her in his arms, but he could never have her the way he desired. It felt like T'Pol was teasing him, getting close to him, yet keeping out of reach. He's attraction to her was so strong that he couldn't imagine that she didn't feel the same yet he knew that her Vulcan teachings would never allow for her to feel for him what he felt for her, if she did she would never act on her feelings, she wouldn't be capable of it. Trip gave a slight smile and sighed, "I've got to go now T'Pol, late for my shift" He looked her in the eyes, hoping to get a smile or some emotional response.
T'Pol looked back at Trip, she gave a slight and friendly smile, "It was good seeing you Commander" They both looked each other in the eyes for a couple of seconds before Trip smiled and walked off. As he passed through the Messhall door his dropped his jaw and gave and exaggerated expression of surprise.
"Oh for God's sake Trip, she's Vulcan, she can't be attracted to me!" Trip quietly shouted to himself, it late at night and he couldn't sleep, all that was on his mind was the smile she gave earlier in the day, "Vulcans don't smile, why'd she smile? Damn it Trip, why the fuck are you speaking to yourself?" He just couldn't get her out of his mind, he felt like it was all he'd thought about all day, every second it was on his mind. All he wanted was to see her again, "Just go to sleep Trip, just go to sleep!"
T'Pol entered sickbay with an uncharacteristic grin on her face, "Good morning Doctor!"
"Ah! Sub-commander, how are you?" Phlox said cheerfully
"I've been having trouble sleeping"
"If you lay right on the edge of your bed, you'll soon drop off" Phlox joked, with a proud grin on his face, but T'Pol just responded with a raised eyebrow.
"I've also been suffering with a slight headache"
Phlox picked up an odd looking instrument and pointed it at T'Pol's head, he gave a slightly confused look, "Umm, interesting. How long has it been since you've meditated?"
"12 days" She said hesitantly. T'Pol noticed the concerned look Phlox now giving her "I've been unable to clear my mind"
"Anything the matter?"
"I'd rather not discuss it, well I'm running late Doctor, I have to go" She snapped aggressively." The doctor was very worried by this uncharacteristic seemingly emotional outburst.
Trip was in the messhall randomly tapping through the personal files, unware of Archer standing behind him. As he scanned through the various files, a picture of T'Pol came up covering the entire screen. All he could do was lean back and gaze lovingly at the picture.
"Trip?" Laughed the captain, jumping suddenly at the sound of the captain's voice, he quickly slammed the pad face down on the table.
Turning around slowly he, he felt a sudden rush of heat to his face, feeling embarrassed, his face went red. The captain regarded him quizzically, "Ah, hey Cap'n, I was just."
"Just?" the captain replied with a smiled.
"Would you like to join me Captain?" Trip said nervously, trying to change the subject.
"We're gonna have a Vulcan ambassador onboard in a couple of days, I came down to talk to chef about cooking a special dinner."
"What does the high command want now?"
"We're just transporting him to a planet, of course they're not telling us what for!"
T'Pol came in, she walk over toward Trip and the captain, "Good afternoon Captain, Trip"
Archer gave T'Pol a confused look, "Trip? That's very informal for you Sub- commander?"
"Would you prefer me to refer to all the crew by their rank, Captain?" T'Pol said in her usually emotionless Vulcan way.
"No, no, it's fine" The joked with a smile, "Anyway, I've gotta talk to chef. Try to have fun you two"
T'Pol sat down opposite Trip, he gave her a slight smile and said, "So, Sub- commander, why do you call me Trip?"
"I consider you my friend, Trip, is if not custom among humans to call your friends by their names?"
"Wow, thanks T'Pol, that means a lot" Trip replied with a surprised look on his face. "So, is anything you want, I was thinking Pasta."
"Pasta sounds good to me" T'Pol said in a happy almost childlike voice, but without showing any physical signs of emotion at all. As Trip walked off, T'Pol picked up the padd he'd left on the table, it took her a couple of seconds to realize what it was she was seeing, it was a picture of her across the entire screen of the pad, why would Trip be looking at her personal file? She didn't know whether to put the pad back down on the table or let Trip know she'd seen it. She quickly put the padd back down. At that moment Trip came back with two cups of Cappuccino, "Thank you, Commander"
T'Pol felt very uncomfortable that Trip had been in her personal files, it instantly struck her that he might be developing romantic feelings toward her. Trip gave T'Pol a sweet smile, "So, how have you been?"
"Good, Commander" T'Pol replied in her normal cold Vulcan way
"Whatever happened to 'Trip'?" The commander joked
"I would prefer to only call you Commander around the crew, as your superior officer it would not appropriate for me to treat you any different any other member of the crew" T'Pol replied coldly
"Um, Okay!" Trip replied suspiciously, "T'Pol, we both have tomorrow evening off, there is a showing of 'Revenge of the Killer Creature Alpha Centauri'" Trip paused and laughed as T'Pol raised an eyebrow, "Um, just wondering you'd be willin' to join me?"
"I'm seing Crewman Hans tomorrow evening" T'Pol said in cold voice. She knew that if Trip did have romantic feelings toward her that this would effect him, but she knew she'd been giving him signs all week that she felt the same way toward him. But did she? She'd never felt like this toward anyone else before, she'd never allowed herself too, she kept her feeling strictly under her own control, but with Trip, it just felt too right, it felt like this is something she'd be incomplete not pursuing, she felt complete fulfillment and satisfaction in his company. But she felt it would never work, not aboard Enterprise, this was exploration for the benefit of Human kind, this wasn't her life, it was just a mission, her job and Trip was a colleague.
"It's alright T'Pol, I'll go with Malcolm or someone, it's no big deal" Trip uttered with obvious disappointment. "What are you doin' with Hans?"
"Dinner, apparently." She said feeling sorry for Trip, but she felt the need to back away from him, she had no idea how to be in a relationship, how she to react, what she'd need to do, she also faced possible dismissal from the High Command, a Vulcan-Human relationship was unheard of and interspecies relationships were taboo in Human culture.
Trip looked obviously shocked, his mouth suddenly went dry. He was so sure that if T'Pol would ever go on a date, that she would choose him. Who was Crewman Hans anyway? How does T'Pol know him? How long have they known each other? Is this serious? Trip had no idea what to say, although T'Pol was Vulcan, the feelings he had for her were so strong, he's couldn't imagine life without her, life without the chance of them being together. "Good for you T'Pol, so who's the lucky guy?" he said trying to sound pleased for the Sub-commander, but it his disappointment came across loud and clear.
"Crewman Daniel Hans, we worked together on the away mission aboard the Alien vessel last week. He asked me to dinner, said he enjoyed my company."
"You do realize he's asked you on a date?"
"It's dinner, Commander."
"Well, along as that's all it is"
"There is no reason why I couldn't pursue a relationship with Crewman Hans, is there commander?" she was actually hoping that Trip would admit his feelings for her, at least that way she would be sure. She wanted to tell him how she felt, although she was unsure and worried about failure, she needed to express herself, holding it in wasn't helping.
"You're Vulcan, you don't have relationships, do you?"
"Vulcans are affected by 'attraction' as much as humans, commander. Vulcan marriages are arranged at birth, I'm no longer arranged to be married with my husband, therefore it is my choice who I choice to attach myself to."
"And you think Crewman Hans is. 'Right', I mean is he your kinda guy?"
"Is it not the point of a date to find that out?"
"Do you think something could happen with this guy?"
"It's only dinner commander"
"Be sure to tell me how it goes"
"I will commander"
A waiter came over and placed two dishes on the table, after hearing about T'Pol's date, Trip didn't feel much like eating, he couldn't understand why T'Pol wouldn't be attracted to him, she showed all the signs. What did this guy have that he didn't? What could he give her that Trip couldn't? Trip pulled one of the dished toward him as T'Pol did the same, T'Pol looked quite baffled as to what it was, she looked up at Trip, "Lasagna" he said cheerfully, still trying to cover up his disappointment. He noticed the padd on the table, realizing he'd left the picture of T'Pol onscreen he picked it up, tapped a few keys and placed it face up on the table. He took his fork and started to play with his food. After hearing what T'Pol had told him, he'd completely lost his appetite but he didn't want T'Pol to suspect anything so he took a mouthful and started to force feed himself.
T'Pol herself had lost her appetite, she had realized she did have feelings for Trip, she knew they could never have a relationship onboard Enterprise, but what had she done? She just told Trip she was open to a relationship with a crewmember on Enterprise, this might prevent Trip from trying to get closer to her for a few weeks, but when he realizes her and Hans won't ever be together he's surely going to try for T'Pol again! It was obvious he was deeply attracted to her. She'd dug herself into this hole and she was the only one who could get herself out of it, but she had no clue how.