Disclaimer: Okay, this is the last time I'm gonna say it cuz this is taking up valuable writing space, I don't own RK or American Pie 1 or 2!

Chapter 2:

"One Stinking Situation After Another"

"Lake Biwa, man, it's the greatest party spot in Japan!" Yahiko announced, throwing his arms up in the air to show his excitement, "The babes'll be all over the place prancing around in bikinis!"

"Oro?! Bikinis?!" Kenshin asked. Well, that got his attention. Even if he would never admit this to anyone, Kenshin had a thing for bikinis, a fetish actually, and having a flock full of girls in them was a total system overload for his mind. 'Bikinis... everywhere... girls in bikinis... Kaoru in a bikini...' Kenshin thought to himself, completely forgetting the fact that Yahiko was still there and he failed to notice himself drooling.

"Kenshin?" Yahiko questioned, snapping Kenshin out of his triple X rated thoughts with a few waves of his hands in front of his face and Kenshin quickly dabbed at the side of his mouth of his drool, smiling nervously as he tried wiping up the puddle of saliva on the table with the elbow of his shirt's sleeve.

"Ehehe... that sounds like a great idea, Yahiko, that it does," Kenshin said nervously, trying his best to cover up the hint he had shown of his rare perverted nature, "Uh... I have to go now!"

"But!" Yahiko started, but Kenshin was already up and out of sight before he could even finish.

Kenshin ran all the way up the stairs of Saito's house, avoiding all the party goers that got in his way as he continued up the steps to see Kaoru. He just couldn't get her out of his mind. Every single second that passed by, every little thing that he saw, reminded him of her, brought him back to that faithful night when he and Kaoru... His thoughts trailed off as he reminisced for what seemed to be the tenth time today, the night they spent together after prom. She had been a goddess, making him feel things he never thought possible; well, not capable of feeling on his own anyway. Things that required someone else to do, and not just anyone, but someone perfect. And in his opinion, Kaoru was that person.

Kenshin knocked softly on her door, whispering as loud as he dared to, praying to God that Saito wouldn't see him and he gently pushed open the door, revealing the pleasant scent of her perfume. He inhaled deeply and walked deeper inside.

"Kaoru? Are you in here?" Kenshin whispered into the air, but no one answered. Looking around the corners of her room and finding no one, Kenshin headed over to her dresser. He turned his head to check for anyone watching him and in seeing that the coast was clear, he opened up one of her drawers. Inside there displayed a neat row of t-shirts aligned and folded up to perfection, and he picked one up, bringing it to his face so he could rub it against his cheek. It was just like holding her.

The overwhelming memories all suddenly rushed back to him, so gentle and intriguing, but were so quickly interrupted by a loud slamming of the door behind him.

"What the HELL are you doing in my house?!" Saito shouted from the doorway, causing the hairs on the back of Kenshin's neck to stand on end at the angry tone in his voice.

"Now, Saito, you should calm down, that you should," Kenshin tried to reason with him, putting his hands up in surrender as if he were negotiating with a crazy man at gunpoint, "I think you should just take a deep breath and..."

"Get outta my house, you little fucker!" Saito threatened as he jumped over the bed that separated them, lunging for Kenshin's throat, his goal set to kill.

"ORO?!" Kenshin screamed, running for his life as Saito bounded down the stairs after him, shaking his fist at him the whole way down, mostly because he had no sharp object at the time to use. "Ororororororo!"

"Shit-Break!!!" Saito shouted, chasing after the red head with his hands outstretched to ring his neck as he quickly gained on him, "Get the hell outta my house!"

Kaoru stood in front of the mirror, air drying her damp hair with her towel when a loud shriek filled her ears. The voice was gentle and oh so recognizable to her and Kaoru frowned as she heard the shrill cry followed by a loud bounding down the stairs. The first thought that ran through her mind was that her brother, Saito, was having a party today. A reunion party. And that meant that Kenshin was invited...

Kaoru dropped her towel to the floor, running out of the bathroom to see a familiar flash of red hair whizz past as the person ran down the stairs, Saito at their heels, shaking his arms wildly about as her brother constantly swore and cursed.

"Kenshin?!" Kaoru exclaimed, running down the steps after the man she had missed so much during the past year at college, praying silently that her brother hadn't found some sort of weapon to beat him with. The back of her robe flew behind her as she ran down to catch up with them and she found Yahiko struggling to hold back Saito as Kenshin tried to hide behind a table, looking like he was about to pee in his pants.

"You get outta my house right now!" Saito shouted, unaware of Kaoru standing behind him in her bathrobe, "Get over here so I can punch the white off your face!"

"Saito, calm down," Yahiko insisted, pushing him back again as Saito tried to advance in his plan of decapitating Kenshin, "we went through this last summer! Kenshin ended up with a black eye and you ended up with six stitches!"

"He started it!" Saito protested, pointing at Kenshin as if to prove his conviction, "That little fucker bit me!"

"Well, you were trying to break every single bone in my body! It was self-defense, that it was!" Kenshin defended himself, hoping that Yahiko's hold on Saito was strong enough to leave him with at least a few of his limbs, "You can't blame me for wanting to stay alive, that you can't!"

"Yeah, well, you should've thought about that before you go screwing around with my sister, asshole!" Saito yelled, again, trying to push back Yahiko, but the smaller man held fast, "Let me go! You don't want any of this, Yahiko!"

"Hajime, stop it!" Kaoru suddenly yelled from behind him, causing everyone at the party to turn and stare, "That's enough out of you! Just leave him alone already! God!" More than fed up, Kaoru pushed past her brother, taking Kenshin's arm to lead him out from under the dinner table, and she ran her hand over his cheek with a look of concern. "Are you okay, Kenshin?"

"Ah, fuck this!" Saito said, rolling his eyes at their display of affection, and he shoved past Yahiko, grabbing Kenshin by the collar and he dragged him over to the door, "See ya later, Shit-Break!" And with that, Saito tossed him out onto the lawn, Kenshin shouting out an astonished, "Oro?!" before he got a face full of dirt.

"Kenshin!" Kaoru wailed, running for the door, but Saito slammed it shut before she could get outside and comfort him. "Hajime, what the hell are you doing?! Open this door right now!"

"Kaoru! One more word outta you and I'm gonna go out there to kill your little boyfriend! So unless you want that, you shut up and get your ass upstairs! And what the hell are you doing down here in your bathrobe?! Get some damn clothes on! And don't call me HAJIME! Shit!" Saito snapped, pointing at the staircase. Kaoru ran up the steps in tears, screaming that she hated him and that he was the worst human being in the world before slamming the door to her room.

Saito turned back around, finding the entire party staring at him with wide eyes. Acting like that sort of thing happened every day, he drew in a puff from his cigarette, shifting his weight to the other foot.

"What the hell are you looking at?!" Saito spat, making all his guests cower in fear and the party continued on as if nothing even happened, not wanting to become the next Kenshin, and Saito smiled in satisfaction. "Now that's better. Hey, Tokio! I'm heading out back, I uh... got some champagne that I've been saving up for a special occasion. Wanna join me?"

How could anyone turn that down? Tokio smiled and followed him outside to the back porch as he ran to the basement to get out the expensive champagne and two tall glasses.

Meanwhile, at Tokyo airport...

"Last call for boarding flight 13 for America!" the flight agent called just as Megumi and Sanosuke ran up to the terminal, carry-on baggage in hand and completely out of breath. The flight attendant smiled. "Do you have your ticket?"

"Yeah, right here," Megumi said, handing the woman her boarding pass and the woman gave her a brochure for traveling on their airlines. Turning back to Sanosuke, Megumi took her bag from him and placed it over her own shoulder. "Well, this is it," she said, shifting uncomfortably under the weight of the bag, "America is gonna be really lonely without a certain Rooster-Head around with me."

"Yeah, well, you're gonna have a great time with or without me," Sanosuke said and he squeezed her hand, "Call me when you get there, alright?" Megumi nodded. "Oh, and one more thing," Sanosuke added in a low whisper, his left hand going to cover one side of his mouth to hide his words from the flight attendant, "is it seriously illegal if you bring foreign food across countries?" Megumi laughed and shook her head at him.

"Bye, Sano," Megumi said, reaching up to kiss him, a little longer than usual and definitely not appropriate for a public airport. Finally breaking apart, she gave him one last hug before she headed down the hall leading to the plane, a pouty look on her face. "I'll see you in a few weeks then! Bye!"

"Have fun," Sanosuke called after her, waving one last time before she disappeared down the corridor and he sighed dejectedly. Turning around to head out, Sanosuke found that the entire seating area population was staring at him. Sanosuke laughed nervously, reveling about their reaction to the intense good-bye kiss Megumi had given him, and he put his hand behind his head for a good old scratch.

"Eheh... That's my girlfriend," Sanosuke said to his 'audience,' trying to casually address the situation as he pointed in the direction Megumi had just gone, "Yeah, she's my girlfriend... Uh huh, okay, see ya later..."

Sanosuke awkwardly left the terminal, all eyes on his back until he was off the floor and inside the elevator. Heaving a sigh of relief from the lack of eyes boring into him, he leaned back against the elevator wall and tried not to think about how long the three weeks were going to seem like with Megumi gone. 'And now to Saito's party,' he thought, suddenly remembering his separate life besides his girlfriend, 'Hope Kenshin's doing all right...'

Back at the party, Kenshin had somehow been let inside the house again by an anonymous person (they preferred not to have their name mentioned due to the circumstances that Saito would totally kick their ass) and everyone made it a point to tell the red head that Saito was out in back with Tokio and that his life was spared. For now anyway... Yahiko patted him on the back and brought him over to the table, sitting him down to continue their conversation about their trip to Lake Biwa.

"So, what do you think? You wanna go to Lake Biwa or what?" Yahiko asked, leaning forward across the table, "The trip'd be kinda weird if you weren't there, but hey! If you don't wanna go and check out the hotties at the beach, that's fine. More for me then! Haha!"

"I think Lake Biwa is the best idea I've heard come out from your mouth since that pact thing!" Kenshin exclaimed, smiling wide at the thought of bamboozles of girls surrounding them in bikinis, "Count me in! I'm going, that I am!"

"Hey guys!" Sanosuke said, finally arriving from dropping Megumi off at the airport, and he took a seat next to Yahiko. Pulling out the last chair, he put his head down on the table, propping up his elbow, and he turned to look at them. "Where are you going, Kenshin?" he asked, having heard the last bit of their conversation.

"Dude, we're all going to Lake Biwa!" Yahiko said excitedly, "We're renting a beach house over there for the summer and we're gonna have parties day in and day out! You coming with us or are you gonna stay here and wait by the phone 'til your girlfriend calls?"

"Hell yeah, I'm there!" Sanosuke announced, slamming his hand down on the table, "It's about time we get outta this rathole of a city! This is gonna be great! A beach outside, good food, cheap ass renting surf boards... Plus I can always just call up the fox whenever I want with my phone card! So when do we go?"

"As soon as I can figure out who else we can bring to help out with the rental," Yahiko said with a sigh, tapping his pen against the notepad in front of him filled with numbers and calculations of the cost of food, supplies, and all the essentials that they would need. "We need one more person to go with us or we can't afford it all."

"But who could we take with us?" Kenshin asked, just as they heard two people talking outside.

"Alright, Hajime, just close your eyes, I've got a surprise for you," Tokio whispered into his ear and he grinned at her suggestion.

"Okay! This outta be fun," Saito said as he obeyed her, closing his eyes as she made her way behind his chair, champagne bottle in hand, completely unaware of what was going on at the balcony above them as Shishio ran out to the balcony, frustrated from the long line to the bathroom and he unzipped his pants.

"Man, why does everybody have to go use the crapper right now?" Shishio said to no one in particular as he began peeing over the balcony edge. Just then Houji walked over behind him.

"Ah, shit..." Shishio rolled his eyes as his friend approached him. Not wanting Houji to see what he was doing, he only half turned around to face him, plastering a fake smile on his face as he continued going over the balcony.

"Shishio! Long time, no see, huh?" Houji said, patting his friend on the back, "How're you doing?"

"I... uh... I've been better," Shishio said truthfully, continuing his bathroom ritual, barely missing Tokio and Saito on the bottom floor, "Listen, can you get me a beer from downstairs?"

"Yeah, sure, I'll be right back," Houji said and he walked off towards the balcony door.

Quickly, Shishio turned to check if his friend was finally gone, but he ended up knocking over a pot from the balcony edge in the process and it fell down to the first floor, hitting Tokio over the head and knocking her out cold.

"Hey, this is kinda kinky," Saito said, his eyes still closed as he anxiously awaited her little surprise and he felt something being poured over his head, "Whoa! Hey! That's right, pour it over my head! Wow! How'd you get it all nice and warm?" Reaching up, he ran his hands through his dampened hair as the 'champagne' poured over his head. "Aw, dude, I can practically taste the bubbles!" Sticking out his tongue to lick the liquid off his lips, Saito drew back as he tasted what he thought was champagne.

"Actually, no, I can't.... Hey, wait a second... Tokio, what kind of champagne is this?" Saito asked, but he received no response. Confused, Saito frowned as he turned around only to find Tokio unconscious on the floor. "Tokio? Uh.... Tokio? ..... Oh, fuck..."

"Much better," Shishio said, zipping up his pants as he finished up his business and walked back to the party, feeling ten pounds lighter and totally obliviously to the shower he had just given to the host of the party.

Saito looked up at the balcony overhead, the truth of what was really being poured over him finally taking it's toll on his brain and he got up and ran back inside the house, his clothes soaked with human waste and his hair matted to his forehead. He turned to Sanosuke, Yahiko, and Kenshin sitting at the table just outside the back door, quelling looks on their faces as if to say, 'What happened to you?' Saito didn't even notice Kenshin's unwanted presence in his house as he looked from one face to another, his own face as pale as rice and he stuttered out the words, "I got... peed on..."

"I think we found our man," Yahiko said, dropping the ink pen down on the table, as if declaring the final decision of who would accompany them to Lake Biwa as the fourth party, "Saito, hit the showers, we're going to Lake Biwa."

A/N: Always remember... Champagne is never naturally warm! Leave a review for me and I give you another chapter! Come on! It's a win-win situation! Buh bai!