DISCLAIMER: Dear Squaresoft people. Please give me FF7-verse and it's characters, so that I'll be able to write kick-ass disclaimers. OK? Pretty please? *flutters her eyelids*
AUTHOR'S NOTES: This is so frustrating.. It seems to take me ages to write anything! *You can faintly hear a very irritated hmpfh* School sucks! I have no time for anything but homework and the occasional sleeping. Which is very very bad. My head is positively cramped with ideas. Now it's just a matter of finding the time to yank them out of my brain. (A gross visual, ignore it.) Hmm.. Well, on with the FanFiction I guess. ^_^ Despite the fact that Aeris and Sephiroth are currenly separated, I still managed to add some A/S yumminess in this chapter. I take great pride in that ability, mind you. ^_~
CHAPTER 33.
He is not here; but far
away
The noise of life begins again
And ghastly through the drizzling rain
On the bald street breaks the blank day.
- Lord Tennyson -
"The assassination scene around here is so not happening.." Zenobius sighed, sitting on a crumbling stone-wall on the outskirts of the city of the Ancients. Shadows of dark clouds wandered past him, creating tangled webs of light on the grounds uneven surface. Zenobius payed hardly any notice to the biculiar phenomenon. He was utterly bored with the town, that had remained abandoned by life for decades. Even monsters avoided it for some reason, so he had absolutely nothing to mame or kill.
Maybe they're at the Crater already.. Jenova suggested thoughtfully, while hovering back and forth on a small patch of dry, yellowish grass.
"Wanna go and check?" Zenobius jumped down from the stone-wall, a bit too eagerly.
Jenova looked at him like she wanted to roll her eyes but was trying really hard not to. One of us has to stay here.. We can't risk that Cetra-girl completing the ceremony. She sighed in frustration. She didn't like waiting around any more than Zenobius did. Especially not at such a point, where she already held the key to her glorious future in the palm of her hand.. Or technically speaking, in the grip of one of her tentacles.
"Which one of us?" Zenobius asked, clearly implying he wouldn't want to spend another moment counting the seconds in the City of the Ancients. The sight of white two-storey houses and the ruins of temples everywhere was almost enough to turn his stomach by now.
I'm not sure. Jenova shrugged.
"So it's a game of rock, paper and scissors again?" Zenobius frowned. He didn't like playing the game with Jenova, since for some reason she won nearly every time.
OK. Jenova's voice was pleased. She hovered closer to Zenobius, and faced him.
"Rock!" Zenobius showed his clenched fist as he had finished counting to three. Jenovas 'hand' was difficult to read, so he just stared at it a while, irritated.
"Let me guess. Paper?" Zenobius grunted.
A tentacle. Jenova answered, as though her ally had asked something obvious.
"There's no such thing in this game. How many times are we gonna have to go over this." The black-haired man heaved a sigh.
Is too. Jenova argued.
"Is not!" Zenobius defended his opinion, suddenly remenbering a scene from his past. He was at the playground in a small village located in the middle of a forest, fighting an older, blond-haired girl who lived next door to him. Or was it down the street? Zenobius shook his head to rid himself of the images.
It's the ultimate, secret weapon of Rock, Paper and Scissors. Like the A-bomb, only with less KABOOM. Jenova explained.
"OK then. You go." Zenobius threw his arms up in the air and gave up. There was no way to beat a super-human, mind-reading alien.
* * * * *
"I can't believe Sephiroth would pull off a stunt like this." Yuffie snorted. She was sitting on the hotel hallway with her knees bent.
"I betcha the Shin-Ra had sumthin' to do with it.." Barret grunted, standing a few feet away from her, by the window. It was calmly snowing outside, the large pure white flakes falling towards ground like feathers. Yuffie bowed her head down a little, an unusually sour look on her youthful face.
"Stupid evil ex-general guy.." She muttered. Red stole a sympathetic glance from across the hallway, where he was sitting next to Cloud.
"You miss him, don't you?" The cat-like creature asked, his tail tapping the beechen floorboards.
"No!" Yuffie made a face at him. "I just.. Not once did he stop to think about how this could affect *me*!" Yuffie folded her arms protectively and turned her head to avoid Red's understanding gaze. "Now I'm the only one with an actual talent in this sad team." She whined.
"Hello, teenager being crushed by pressure of saving your sorry asses over here!" Yuffie heaved an irritated sigh, clearly implying she was in need of some positive re-encouragement. Nobody said anything though. "Well thanks for ignoring my pain." The teenager muttered under her breath.
The thick, wine red velvet curtains at the end of the corridor shuffled quietly, as a cleaning woman pulled them aside from a large picture-window. Cloud stared at Yuffie indifferently, wondering if there could possibly be a more insensitive person in the whole of existence. But at the same time he knew, this was just Yuffie's way of coping with it all. The sudden change in Sephiroth's state of mind had had it's effect on all of them, most of all on those who had been closest to him.
"Geez, and what's with the my-pride-has-been-hurt face? Like you *really* had anything to be proud of." The teenaged ninja rolled her eyes. "The least you could do is give credit where-- when.. it's due or whatever. Preferably in the form of materia." She grinned.
Cloud glanced at Yuffie amused, and shook his head slightly. "For the last time Yuffie, your false emotional trauma is not enough to make us give you all our materia." He sighed.
"Hmpfh.. Fine. It's not like I really wanted your shoddy materia anyway." Yuffie pouted and fell silent again.
Straw-coloured bangles of hair fell down Cloud's forehead, as he hung his head back down. He was sitting opposite to room number 4, to which Aeris had run straight into two hours ago. A part of him was feeling anxious to leave for the crater already, but the more sensitive part of his brain forced him to wait for Aeris to calm down again. She was his responsibility.. But more importantly, she was his friend. Tifa had went in an hour ago, to talk to her. At least the shouting had seized now. The silence that hung in the air was not much better though, it was like the pause between two heartbeats. Just a quiet, ominous whisper of blood coursing through veins, unsure of whether it would continue moving or forever stand still.
Cloud turned his clear-blue eyes at the window the cleaning woman had revealed. She had continued her route to tidy up the rooms and could not be seen at the moment. Outside everything looked so magically white. He couldn't find the horizon, for the sky was as white as the ground. It was a biculiar scenery, such that gave him a sinister sence of being trapped in a snowball. A weak smile passed Cloud's features at the thought. Where on earth had that come from? What a silly thought.
The door to room number four creaked as it opened up. Tifa stepped into view and immediatly everyone's attention was on her.
It didn't take her long to pick up the worried glances of the other AVALANCHEr's, and she gave them her best reassuring smile. "She's finally calming down.. So nobody mention the S-word, OK?" Tifa said as she pushed the door to Aeris' room shut.
"So she'll be coming out at some point?" Red asked, and stood up on his four feet. After gently shaking his mane, Red turned his head back at Tifa.
"She just needs a minute." The dark haired girl answered with a nod of her head. For a moment an awkward silence lingered in the corridor as everyone tried to think of the politically correct way to express their thoughts on everything that had happened.
"That guy SO has major commitment issues.." Yuffie snorted, a slight shadow of anger passing over her youthful complexion. "I'm gonna go down and tell the others." She said then, and strolled down the hallway towards the staircase.
"I think she just about said it all.." Tifa joked, but none of them missed the sad expression on her face.
"So she'll be fine? She.. looked a bit shaken." Cloud began. He wanted Tifa to tell them something about Aeris' condition. It was a miracle she was still sane, after dying and being resurrected and then getting violently dumped by the man she had intended to marry.
"A bit? Aren't you the king of understatement." Tifa raised a brow, with a barely noticable smile on her lips.
"It's that bad, huh?" Cloud asked. He knew Aeris wasn't fairing well with everything that had happened, but the look on Tifa's face suggested that the last cetra was in a lot darker place than any of them knew.
"I can only begin to imagine what Aeris must be going through.. To have someone she loves attack her like that.." As Red spoke, Cloud held his eyes at Tifa. There was something so mature about the dark-haired girl now, and Cloud couldn't stop feeling puzzled by the change he could sence in her.
"But he didn't kill her.. That has to count for something." Tifa commented, and cast a passing glance at Cloud. As their eyes met, Cloud could almost hear her soft voice asking him if everything was going to be OK.
"It's impossible to say what's going through his mind right now.." Cloud answered her question absent-mindedly.
"He did however, treat her like an enemy.. So it's fair to say we're on different sides from now on." Red sighed, and shook his head with a sad expression on his face.
"Hard to believe, huh?" Tifa frowned, and paced slowly towards the stairs. She knew Vincent, Caith Sith and Cid were waiting downstairs for them.
"So Sephiroth's going back to Jenova? Oh great, just what I need. More evil to fight." Cloud hit his forehead, sighing in frustration. He walked aside Red on the dusty carpet spread out on the floor, and then followed Tifa and Barret down the stairs, silently thinking how hopeless their situation seemed like. Still he never let the others notice his uneasiness, as he entered the vacant, spacious lobby of Icicle Village Inn. Without saying a word, everyone gathered around a long table to wait for Aeris to come down and join them.
* * * * *
"I love you."
An image of a tired looking girl sitting on the bed of a hotel room ran through Sephiroth's mind like a bolt of electricity. She was smiling at him, and the nearly intoxicating scent of her hair and skin seemed to flow in the air like mist. Under Sephiroth's intense gaze her cheeks soon flustered, like she had a reason to feel ashamed. The innocent smile never fading from her lips, the girl moved a whisp of hair that shadowed her vision behind her ear. She looked so delicate and fragile, Sephiroth felt a sudden need to protect her. Despite the weariness in the girl's expression, she looked heavenly. Her feet were folded on top of the bed, and long braided curls hung loosely on her shoulders and back. The pink silk ribbon that held her hair back, brought out the sparkling emerald green of her eyes. Sephiroth was stunned by how much warmth, love and acceptance hid behind the girl's questioning gaze. As her body moved ever so gently, the light fabric of her pink dress rippled like water.
And suddenly it was all gone. Sephiroth blinked in confusion, and held his vacuous stare at the scenery that spread around him.
"A-Aeris?" He breathed out the name, and took a step back. His back met the frozen stone wall behind him. He was standing on a narrow path that wound up the side of the tall North-crater walls.
"That girl from Icicle Village.." Sephiroth muttered, as he held his gaze at the scenery. Below him, vast snowfields spread towards the dark-blue ocean. Boulders of stone and withering trees broke the pure white colour of the grounds surface. A violent gust of wind blew snow from on top of the crater, and Sephiroth shuddered in the cold. He knew he had to keep moving, for he still had a long way to go before reaching his destination. And yet..
Sephiroth couldn't stop thinking about the girl who had attacked him. What a bizarre person she had to be, to first knock him unconsious and then proclaim her love for him. Sephiroth ran his fingers through his hair, and took in a deep breath. He had felt the power beneath her fragile exterior, and how disconnected the girl was from her true strength. Such things made her dangerous to Sephiroth, and his mission, so he couldn't figure out why eliminating the threat she posed was such an impossible thought to him. Even as he had threatened to kill her, he had spoken the words light-heartedly, like telling a bad joke. Maybe the girl had senced it from him, maybe that was the reason she hadn't trembled in fear like the most of them? Sephiroth blinked, as he continued walking ahead, and quickly cast all thoughts aside.
The earth was icy and slippery, the road narrow and treacherous. He had to concentrate his thoughts, to avoid stepping on loose stones near the edge. If he'd fall and break his bones, he'd freeze to death. Such was the life of a SOLDIER.. And a part of Sephiroth loved it. The simplicity of it all. Out here, survival was all up to him.
After a half an hour of climbling up the side of the crater wall, Sephiroth had finally reached a ledge from which the opening to the cave-system was visible. A pleased smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth, as he took the first step towards the shadowy darkness of the Northern Crater. Inside the cave the temperature never fell as low as it did outside in the icy wind. Mako crystals glittered in the walls, and sinister shadows of large icicles that dangled from the ceiling were cast along the path that led deeper inside the stone caverns.
The air was stuffy and cold, and Sephiroth could hear water dribbling down from high up. The sound echoed loudly in the silence that surrounded him. The crater was like a world of it's own.. No wonder many mistook it for the Promised Land. Jenova had once explained it to him, that the crater was merely a gateway. A door to the netherworld.. At times Sephiroth wondered what it would be like, on the other side of this dull realm. After all, he had experienced the closeness of death all his life. It was a strange comfort, to believe there existed a place like the Promised Land.. But Sephiroth wasn't sure if he did, anymore. All that mattered now was power and strength, so that he'd get to continue this pitiful existence for as long as he could. But then what? Would the Promised Land be nothing more for him but a dark void, to contain all beings such as him, that held nothing but cold in their closed hearts?
Glass-like walls of ice edged the path Sephiroth was walking on, and he cast a quick glance in their direction. A sudden flash of himself as a boy ran through Sephiroth's mind, as he saw his obscure reflection. It had been during his first sword-practising sessions, that he had accidentally or not, cut himself in the wrist. And he remembered watching the bleeding, indifferently as though he had not believed he could bleed like regular children. Sephiroth thought he couldn't have been much older than five or six at that time. Any other child would have cried, but he never did. The wound healed without leaving so much as a scar on his skin, but something in him changed that day. After that he never really cared whether he survived or not. That, among other things had made Sephiroth such a legendary SOLDIER. He practically threw himself into potentially dangerous situations, a part of him always hoping he would get outnumbered or surprised in combat. He had feared himself, even more than he had feared death. He knew the sick things he could do. He felt the part of Hojo within. It was like a knot in the middle of his brain, he could never undo. It remained inside of him, throbbing waves of self-loathing and rage.
Jenova had always said, he should accept it as a part of who he was.. Since a good half of his genes were those of a monster, he should behave like one. But something always held him back from the brink of total lunacy. It was something Sephiroth couldn't capture by things as simple as words. Perhaps it was a fading dream of times when things had been better for him. When he didn't have to make people fear him to gain respect. And now that girl.. Watching her smile had felt so much better, than years of listening to people begging frantically for their lives. And Sephiroth wasn't sure why. Maybe he was not that different from regular people after all? Suddenly a muffled cry of a Ruby Dragon shook the thin icing on the caverns' walls.
Who was he kidding, Sephiroth snorted. Normal people thought of families, and work. His thoughts revolved around ambush tactics, gutting dragons, and the occasional beheading of innocent by-standers. All things considered, it didn't spell out normalcy. Sephiroth drew his sword from it's sheath, and proceeded silently to the next cavern through a small opening in the stone wall. This wasn't the time or the place to wallow in self-pity, he had a dragon to take care of. A concentrated expression on his face, Sephiroth followed the stomping footfalls of the large, ruby-red beast.
* * * * *
"Hmm?" Aeris' eyelids opened up slowly. She peeked a glimpse of the room around her. Cream white paint was peeling of the ceiling. She stared at the cracks in it's smooth surface, trying to let her mind to wander. Everything was so very still.. There wasn't a sound to be heard, despite her own breathing.
"Sephiroth.." Aeris sighed, and the bed covers shuffled slightly as she changed her position. She had been moping in her room for hours now, like some pathetic guy-dependant wimpy person. Aeris bit her lip in frustration. She had actually been looking forward to spending some quality time with her boyfriend. Instead, she had gotten herself dumped, and nearly killed in the process. Aeris rolled to her side, keeping her eyes glued to an oil-lamp on her bed-side table. It cast a dim, warm glow to the space surrounding it, shadowing the lonely figure spread out on the bed. Aeris wished she was still back in Cosmo Canyon. At least then, she had felt alive.
* * * * *
"How was your walk?" Aeris grinned nervously, while squeezing the doorhandle with her fingers. Sephiroth was standing in the doorway, his head bowed down. As he lifted his gaze, heavy bangles of silvery hair retreated to frame his face.
"OK, I guess." He smirked.
Outside in the hallway, a row of oil-lamps shone soft light on to the cream white, painted walls. A colourful rag rug lead past their room, towards the register desk. Sephiroth leaned back against a wall, heaving a sigh. The subdued, yellowish light shadowed his features, as his gaze sunk back to the floorboards. In the softness of the surrounding interior, his black leather clothing presented a strong contrast. Aeris noticed, Sephiroth held his Masamune by the handle. She figured he had probably ran into some monsters that ventured to Cosmo Canyon at night fall.
"Come in." She said, and stepped aside from the door for Sephiroth to enter. With just a few long strides, the tall man walked in past Aeris. She smiled at his back, and pushed the wooden door shut. The sharp echo of the door's lock clicking as it closed made Sephiroth shoulders tense visibly. He stood in the middle of the room, motionless like a statue, still crushing the handle of his sword.
"You mind putting that thing away. It gives me the wiggins." Aeris said light-heartedly from the door, her hands clasped behind her back.
"Hmm? Sure." Sephiroth's voice lacked it's usual demanding boom, and he paced to a writing desk.
Aeris watched from her distance, as he slid the Masamune inside it's sheath before placing it on the table. After letting go of the sword, Sephiroth spent a moment just watching it lying there with it's flat side down. On both sides of the table there was a large, white framed window. A view of Cosmo Canyons rocky passes spread from the both of them. The left one Aeris had left open for ventilation, and every now and then a fierce gust of wind blew inside, making the beige linen curtains sway wildly in the air. White paper sheets were blown down from the tables surface, and their soft rustle broke the silence in the room. The jingle of a metallic windchime could be heard from outside.
"Should I close the window?" Aeris asked in a hushed voice, as she walked over to the window. When the sound of her walking came to a halt, Sephiroth stole a glance at her. She was fixing up the windblown curtains, her skin bathed in the pale blue, nightly shimmer streaming in through the glazing of the windows.
"No.. Just leave it like that." Sephiroth answered, and Aeris could feel his gaze bore into her back.
"Are you.. sure?" She asked in a high-strung voice. She could hear the shuffling of Sephiroth's long leather coat as he moved.
"Um-hmm." He murmured, from somewhere behind her. The faint reflection of his luminous stare hit Aeris' eyes through the windows glass. She shivered in the cold draft, her skin quickly developing goose-pimples.
"It looks nice out there." Aeris stared at the moon, whose pale form could be seen from under a grey blanket of clouds. A few twinkling stars here and there were but finishing touches to the eery scenery, Aeris thought she could almost hear the howls of nocturnal animals from the wilderness.
"Sephiroth..?" Aeris breathed out the name, as she felt him towering behind her.
"Yes..?" He asked in a husky voice.
"You know I.." Aeris gasped, startled to feel Sephiroth's hands slide over her shoulders. His fingers grabbed the collar of her red jacket gently, pulling it back. Effortlessly he removed the piece of clothing, dropping it on a chair by the desk.
Like he was undressing a doll.
"I.." Aeris whimpered, as his hands returned to her skin, falling achingly slowly down the sides of her arms, warming up her skin. Every nerve beneath her body was tingling with sensations, Sephiroth's dark aura seemed to induce. The fact that he was supposed to kill her, only made each caress that much more thrilling. Instictively as his cheek brushed against the side of Aeris' head, she arched her neck to the side. The gentle, warm breeze of Sephiroth's breathing met her neck only moments before his lips, forcing a moan of pleasure to escape Aeris' lips. And then came the mad blushing. She turned around to face him, even if she was slightly embarrassed of herself.
"You're OK?" Sephiroth's words came out more as a statement than a question.
"I'm fine." Aeris smiled demurely, while staring at her hands. She felt Sephiroth's index finger trace her jawline, lifting her face up by the chin. They shared a long, charged look, that ended in Sephiroth placing a kiss on the crown of her braided hair.
"I love you." She whispered shakily, unsure why she felt tears gleaming in her eyes. Far across the space, flames of candles and oil-lamps quivered in a weak gust of wind. The room looked like it was burning slowly with amber flames, yellow lights searching for creatures hidden in the shades. Aeris took a small step back, to support some of her weight against the wall behind her. She couldn't hear Sephiroth move, but he did. The warmth of his body was a welcomed contrast to the cold emanating from the wall behind her.
Aeris lifted her gaze to meet his, watching their lips draw slowly closer, desperate for release. She closed her eyes at the moment their lips met in an innocent butterfly kiss. But the delicate atmosphere soon changed. Aeris felt her pulse quicken as she was pressed against the wall, and could hear the heavy breaths Sephiroth took as he closed in on her again. Or was it her own breathing, she couldn't tell. Aeris parted her lips willingly as he kissed her again, firing up every sleeping nerve-ending in her skin.
She burrowed her fingers into Sephiroth's hair, pulling him closer the same time he struggled to undo the buttons of Aeris' dress. Having finished the job, he pushed the smooth cloth down from Aeris' shoulders. To his pleasure, she wriggled her body more than happily to discard it. Aeris heard her pink dress fall down and hit the floorboards beneath her feet, but didn't bother to pick it up or fold it on top of a table. With a soft shuffle she stepped out of the pile of cloth, and weakly kicked the dress aside. They parted from a kiss simultaneously to breathe, and the two stared at each other with lustful, drowzy eyes. Aeris' slender fingers quickly opened up the belt holding Sephiroth's leather-coat, and she dropped it to the floor. Neither pair of ears registered the sound of the belt-buckle hitting the floorboards, as the two lovers plunged into another, passionate kiss.
* * * * *
Aeris swallowed hard as her thoughts returned to the present. Memories weren't of any comfort to her, they just hurt. When recalling happy moments of the past, her current misery felt all the more overwhelming. She turned to her back, noticing her fingers were crushing a corner of the blanket. Her mind was in shambles, processing thoughts more slowly than usually. It was only now that Aeris' mind registered the image of Tifa, and her ears caught the words that she had spoken. An hour after Tifa had left Aeris' room for two. Aeris sat up on the side of the bed, her feet limply touching the floor. Her eyes strayed to the window, her pale skin stained in drying streaks of tears. Only pale sunlight managed to push through heavy white clouds that hung on the sky. Everything looked so quiet, so dead. Aeris tried to swallow the bitter lump in her throat, as another agonized groan escaped her lips. She wondered if the pain would ever be less.
Snow fell down calmly. Even the largest flakes didn't make a sound as they hit ground. There was no rustle of dry leaves, no cry of wind against the shingle roof. Just this horrible stilness, like a dampened scream the walls absorbed. It was all around. The pain that stung her eyes. Quickly Aeris wiped the corners of her eyes. She missed Elmyra, the woman she had grown to think of as her mother. Aeris had thought, if it had been a mistake to ever leave from her.. But the thought just made her angry. There was no way she'd regret getting involved with Sephiroth. He had warned her, that in this fairytale romance they would not end up living happily ever after. But still.. Why was it she always wanted the men who would hurt her? Abandon her?
~You shouldn't blame Sephiroth, dear..~ The Planet whispered.
"I know." Aeris' voice broke, and a frightened sob trembled her petite frame. "But I have to blame him. I have to.." She whimpered. The Planet felt like her only comfort now, and she cocooned herself in the familiar presence.
"Because I keep going over the sweet things he's told me.. and everything he's done for me.. And it throws me." She whispered faintly.
"I can't go after Jenova now. How can I fight her, if all I want to do is.. be with Sephiroth?" Aeris asked.
~The human mind is such a complex thing.. Perhaps you underestimate the power of love? Maybe it's not too late to help him.~ The Planet seemed to smile at her, warming up her cool skin.
"He can't even remember me. He thinks I'm the enemy. If he sees me, he'll kill me. I know it." Aeris shut her eyes tightly, standing up. She leaned over her bedside table and killed the flame inside the oil-lamp.
~And you?~ The Planet inquired in a motherly voice.
"I can't even.." Aeris covered her face with her palms, trying to stop herself from bursting into tears again.
~You should go to the others. All will become clear, in time.~ The Planet explained, fading from Aeris' presence.
"To the others.." Aeris snorted, and walked to a mirror. She splashed some water on her face from a porcelain bowl, and then dried her complexion with a small white towel. It reminded her a little bit of Sephiroth. Since the towel was white and.. he used white towels too. Aeris frowned miserably.
After getting her mind off all things gloomy, Aeris strode determined to the door, her fingers sliding casually around the doorknob. As she turned it, Aeris thought back to all the things Tifa had said. She had used quite possibly all the common phrases one could, to console a broken-hearted friend. Like "You should try to see the glass half full", "This is not the end of the world", "You'll be better off without him" and "Maybe the next guy you date won't be such an unstable lunatic".
OK so maybe Tifa hadn't exactly spoken that last one out loud. But Aeris was certain she had thought it.
Tifa's kind gesture hadn't made Aeris feel any better. No words could lift her spirits, not anymore. Not after seeing her one true love furrow his brow and ask her who she was.
Like none of it had ever happened. Like it hadn't been real.
The door slid open slowly, and Aeris stepped outside into the corridor. Before closing the door she picked up her backpack, which Tifa had prepared for her. Feeling like she was only half awake, Aeris pushed the door until it clicked shut. She leaned against the doors smooth surface a while, trying to pick herself up before joining the others downstairs. She knew they were all worried, and would like to see a smiling, happy-go-lucky type of an Aeris. Even if she felt like the complete opposite, Aeris didn't want her friends to worry about her. Taking in a deep breath, Aeris began shuffling along the long corridor. The soles of Aeris' shoes rubbed against the dusty carpet on the floor as she walked, her thought soon straying back to Sephiroth. As she begun her descent to the lower floors, she could hear the muffled voices of Tifa and Cloud, as they talked.
"Do you think maybe you should go check on her?" Cloud's low voice asked, and Tifa chuckled.
"The time is hardly nie for suicide watch." She laughed. "You're so predictable, always worrying about the women.." She continued, but soon their discussion came to an abrupt end.
"Hi." Aeris greeted her friends with a half-hearted wave of her hand.
"Hi, Aeris.. You look.. great." Cloud stammered while staring at her openly, worry in his expression.
"The others are out waiting.. If you feel like leaving for the crater already." Tifa gave Aeris a friendly smile.
"I think so, yeah. I mean, fighting evil is no doubt the best way to mend a broken heart." Aeris grinned nervously. She walked over to her friends in silence.
"Well, if that's the way you feel.." Tifa and Cloud shared a look Aeris couldn't miss.
"I'm fine, alright!" She tried to smile, with badly concealed anger in her voice.
"Sure." Tifa nodded, and glanced at the door behind her. "We'd better get going then." She said, and grabbed Cloud's hand. Together they led the way out of the Inn. Even though Aeris knew Tifa was hardly throwing her relationship with Cloud at Aeris' face, it certainly felt like that.
Stepping out into the fresh layer of snow, Aeris met the familiar sight of Icicles Village's main street, that wound through the town. Across the street from the Inn's entrance, Vincent, Cid and Barret sat on the stairs of a weapons store, staring down at the ground with sullen expressions on their faces. Near a signpost Aeris saw Yuffie standing around with Cait Sith and Red. She was kicking snow with her shoes, the word boredom written all over her appearance. Immediatly as the door closed with a low thump, everyone lifted their eyes to look at Aeris. Red walked over to her, sitting back down on his hind legs next to her. Aeris took the opportunity to scratch him behind the ear gently.
"Wow. I never knew I was this popular." She let out a snort of amusement, as the others kept gaping at her.
"Aeris! We we're just.. Are you OK? I can't believe Sephiroth did that to you! He's just.. evil and really.. evil." Yuffie struggled to find something supporting to say. As the S-word reached Aeris' ears, a trace of deep longing returned to her face.
"No need for ex bashing.. I'm alright." Aeris attempted a smile, but it looked more like a frown.
"You don't look fine. I mean, those dark circles under your eyes and the paleness.. And Aeris, what's the deal with the roadkill on your head?" Yuffie studied Aeris' hair with great interest. Aeris just rolled her eyes, after she had quickly ran her fingers through her tear-matted, tangled curls.
"Thanks Yuffie. That cheered me up nicely." She forced a sarcastic grin on her face, but Yuffie seemed to miss the insinuation.
"Glad I could be of service." She chirped light-heartedly, and strolled further along the narrow, snowy road.
"Wanna know the key to surviving her? Ignore." Red said under his breath, and the for the first time that day, a genuine smile spread on Aeris' lips.
* * * * *
"Gosh this floor is cold!" Aeris squealled, as she hopped on the double-sized bed. She had finished blowing out all the candles spread around the tables of the room, and was eager to return to the warmth of her boyfriends body. Sephiroth was already lying on his side of the bed in a sitting position, his eyes drawn to look out through the nearby window. She noticed Sephiroth glance at her inexpressively, as her weight made the spring mattress creak, looking like he was lost in some deeply sad memory.
"So what's with the solemn face?" Aeris asked Sephiroth, while burrowing under the covers.
"I was just.. Thinking." Sephiroth answered, and a shadow of a smile past his features.
"About what." Aeris rested her head against a plump, fluffy pillow, holding her eyes at Sephiroth.
"You." He said, and cast a glance at the woman next to him. The covers were positioned snuggly around her body, exposing every sensuous curve. Aeris just raised a brow, a mischievous sparkle in her eyes. "What can I say. I have a one-tracked mind." Sephiroth answered her with a shrug, and turned his gaze away again.
"So let me guess.. Your thoughts pretty much revolved around my infamous death?" Aeris nuzzled closer, extending her arm across Sephiroth's bare chest. The tips of her fingers traced lazy patterns across his skin, and she smiled as his muscles involuntarily rippled under her touch.
"When did you become such a mind reader?" Sephiroth looked down into the eyes of his drowzily smiling girlfriend.
"I had a great teacher." She chirped.
Aeris' loose hair tickled the side of Sephiroth's body as she corrected her position a little. "I hope that's all I taught you." Sephiroth smirked, watching as she raised her head a little.
"No, I have a pretty good grasp on your wicked consept of humour also." Aeris said, her grin spreading from ear to ear as she saw a half-smile force it's way on Sephiroth's face too.
"Oh, you mean the kind that involves humiliating others until they're a sobbing pile of shame?" He asked, smirking.
"Yep, that's the one." Aeris nodded, trying to keep weariness she was feeling at bay. The day had been a tiring one, but she wanted to stay awake for as long as humanly possible.
"I'm so glad I took the time to teach you that." Sephiroth said, and all though Aeris couldn't see his expression, she knew he had that trademark smirk on his face. Her head rested in the crook of Sephiroth's arm, she felt herself drift further into peaceful slumber.
"No big. So, what's the status on your self-flagellation?" Aeris asked, peeking a glimpse of Sephiroth's face. His bright expression darkened at the memory of something, and he didn't look back at Aeris as he answered.
"..I don't think I'm over the initial shock yet. Of being back here I mean. I keep seeing you dead.. And it's really disturbing." Sephiroth's voice was calm, but beneath his cool exterior Aeris could feel pain and sadness.
"Tell me about it. I've been trying to avoid mirrors all day." Aeris joked, and smiled widely as Sephiroth laughed. For a person who's idea of fun was sulking in dark corners, Sephiroth sure had the most perfect laughter. As Aeris lifted her head to look at him, she saw a rare, full-blown smile on his face.
"Wow." Aeris whispered, and traced the beatiful anomaly with her index-finger.
"What?" He asked, and Aeris could feel Sephiroth trying to pull back from her reach. He was obviously disturbed by the attention, but she ignored it.
"I've missed your smiles." Aeris told him, staring at him in the eyes almost as if daring him into doing something.
"Not as much as I've missed you.. This haze you seem to put me in." Sephiroth told her in a quiet voice. Aeris wondered if he still felt awkward about speaking so openly of his feelings.
"Glad to be your supplier of the Loooove-drug." Aeris giggled, enjoying the sight of Sephiroth laughing again. She knew she'd never get tired of seeing him so happy.
"Seriously, am I putting the jinx on us by saying I'm so happy I could explode?" Aeris frowned, as she returned her head back down. Sephiroth just winced at her question.
"I'll take that as a yes then." Aeris smiled.
"No, I just thought of a monster who can actually do that. Explode by will, I mean. Avoid them if you can, after getting their smelly guts all over you, you'll never be the same again." Sephiroth chuckled, and layed back on the bed's surface.
Aeris just crimaced in disgust. "You're the un-sung hero of turn-offs." She said solemnly, but couldn't help smiling at the little half-smile that tugged at the corner of Sephiroth's mouth.
"It's a questionable honour yet I find myself impressed." He said, and turned his head to look at Aeris. His eyes were filled with trust and love, that made his handsome features even more appealing to Aeris.
"Wiseass." She smirked playfully, and leaned over to kiss him.
* * * * *
"Whatcha thinkin'?" Barret's voice erased the bittersweet smile from Aeris' lips.
"Nothing. The evening before last." Aeris explained, and shook her head gently. "It doesn't matter." She added a bit ashamed.
"Hey, I guess it's just natural ya still have fuzzy feelings towards the guy." Barret said thoughtfully.
"I wonder what will happen when I see him again." Aeris sighed, knowing there was no way she could harm Sephiroth. Even if the price were her own life, she couldn't imagine herself ever hurting him.
"Yer fearin' ya might not be able to restrain yourself? Opportunity makes the thief and all that." Barret smiled.
"Yeah, now that you put it that way.." Aeris glanced at the older man amused. "Barret.. Do you think it's just wistful thinking, to believe maybe.. He's not too far gone to be saved?" She then asked.
"And as the beautiful maiden broke away from the kiss, the frog turned into a handsome prince.."
Aeris suddenly recalled the voice of Elmyra, reading her an old fairytale by her bed. "What happened then, mommy? Did they get married?" She had asked, childlike enthusiasm in her voice.
"They sure did! And then they lived in their castle with all the servants happily ever after!" Elmyra had smiled so broadly as she had closed the book.
Barret just shrugged, noticing the absent-minded look on Aeris' face. "I dunno.." His voice didn't sound too assuring.
"I know, it's silly." Aeris frowned, fiddling with a green materia-orb in her hands. It was just about the most concrete evidence Aeris had of her relationship with Sephiroth since it was a gift from him after all. Along with her new materia-bracelets. Aeris had also put the ring she had found in the snow in her finger, despite the hurtful memories looking at it brought back.
Their group was walking on a path edged to the bottom of the crater valley, leading from Icicle Village through a deserted village to the crater wall. From there they'd most likely have to climb up, unless they'd be able to spot an alternative route up. Cloud had said it wasn't likely though, since none were marked to the map he had bought from an ex mountain-climber.
"We could climb up here.. It'll take us a few hours.. But it's still a shortcut, right?" Cloud was studying his map with Red, who was walking next to him in the lead of their team.
"Yes, it would take us ages to circle around that.. But what about this here.." Red commented, and the two continued their argument over details.
Aeris turned her attention to Vincent, who was staring at an old, crumbling building not far away. It was located at the base of a rapid. The river had grinded it's way through the mountain, since it's running water couldn't freeze. The sides of the river were covered in ice and frost, rendering them dangerous for monsters that came to drink or fish. A creature would most likely fall in and die, should it go too close.
Vincent felt Aeris' eyes on him, and glanced at her over his shoulder. "Is everything all right?" He asked, but instantly realized it was a stupid question to ask. Of course not.
"I was just.. It's kind of beatiful, out here." She smiled half-heartedly.
"Yes, you're quite right. Remote places are where we can truly see the effects of time.. And what small particles we truly are in the course of history." Vincent spoke, marveling at an icicle melting on a treebranch.
"Way to cheer up the girl, Vince." Yuffie gave him a snort of contempt.
"Hey, there's no need for cheering up. I'm still cheered up from before." A frightful look passed Aeris' features, as Yuffie turned to her and opened her mouth.
"OK then. If you think so." The young ninja wringed her brow and ran off, as she saw Tifa was battling against two jumpings.
"Let me give ya a hand with those carrot-eating pests!" She proclaimed while running to her aid.
"I wonder what's the source of that ethereal green light.." Vincent said, while staring at something at the peak of the craters walls.
It looked like a magic-storm, it's colour much like that of a spell Sephiroth had used, Ultima. Aeris doubted, that even he could create such a powerful spell. The spectrum of light quivered, vanishing momentarily from sight. Aeris sighed, and turned her attention back to the ground. She could only hope Jenova was not very far with her scheme, since Aeris had yet to come up with a way to stop her. The Planets cryptic warnings and instructions weren't of much help. "You will know" was not much of a comforter.
After a few hours of strenuous walking in the snow, the team finally reached the base of the mountain, from which the nearly vertical walls of the crater rose to some quite impressive heights.
"Wow. What I wouldn't give for a little inhuman strength right now." Aeris gasped, as her eyes measured the long climb ahead. The others glanced at her, probably glad that her mood had improved a little.
"I'm certain we'll succeed." Vincent's voice was unusually determined.
Aeris watched him take the first step, and begin climbing, wondering what was bothering the mysterious man. After seeing the slight bruising on Aeris' throat, from where Sephiroth had choked her, Vincent had hardly said a word. And even when he did speak, the subject of what was troubling him never came up.
A small distance away, Cloud and Tifa where taking a breather before following the others up the side of the crater wall. They stood next to each other in silence, leaning against a smooth boulder of rock.
"Tifa." Cloud began, and turned to the dark-haired woman. Her chocolate brown eyes wavered under his gaze, and she quickly averted his eyes by bowing her head down.
"Cloud I.." Her soft voice trembled, as she spoke.
"Tifa.." Cloud began again, trying to capture the girls attention.
"I know." She formed with her lips, tears shining in her eyes. She faced her old childhood friend, gazing at him from closeby. The wind pulled her hair to the side, shadowing the other side of her face. Cloud just stared at her a while, until he felt a foreign presence. Tifa cleared her throat loudly, and turned away. A blush lit a red glow to her cheeks. Behind them, Yuffie was standing with a triumphant smirk on her lips. Cloud and Tifa just glared at her.
"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realize this was a private occasion for the emotionally challenged." She countered, still standing around like waiting for the two friends to kiss already.
"Go away Yuffie." Cloud heaved an irritated sigh.
* * * * *
..Sephiroth? Jenova's voice was puzzled. She was standing in a cavern, whose walls rose vertically towards the skies. Shades of turquoise, green and dark blue coloured the blocks of ice were scattered all around. Mako Crystals had painted the black stone walls into shades of pearly green. Jenova waited a moment in silence, hearing the echo of a single footfall from somewhere closeby. Gloomy shadows danced across the floor, as Sephiroth walked out of his shadowy corner.
"It's me." He said, and smirked coldly.
I didn't expect you to show up. Jenova's voice was suspicious, but she didn't withdraw as Sephiroth calmly paced closer.
"Well what can I say.." Sephiroth lifted his eyes from coloured blocks of ice on the ground, and stared at the monstrous form of the alien hovering before him. "I just couldn't stay away." He smirked evilly.
"I see you've already gone ahead with the Reunion.." He spoke, as he looked down at the corpses of people dressed in black cloaks. Around them, a sparkling green aura of light began to shine again.
What's it to you? I thought you and miss goody-two-shoes were an item now.. Jenova snarled, the anger Sephiroth's betrayal had caused creeping into her voice.
"Who..?" Sephiroth furrowed his brow.
That Cetra bitch, Aeris what's-her-face.. Jenova explained, staring at Sephiroth bewildered. Was her son only faking it, or couldn't he really remember? Jenova smiled inwardly at the irony of it all. There was hardly a more amusing thing, than to see that cetra-girl get murdered by her lover.
"Oh." Sephiroth tilted his head to the side, an inexpressive look on his face.
You have no idea what I'm talking about, have you? Jenova asked, her voice vibrating with malicious laughter.
"I must say.. not really." Sephiroth just stared at her blankly.
Then.. I must be imagining things. You know me, I'm just crazy, hahaha! Jenova let out a fit of false laughter. Sephiroth didn't notice her shifty eyes nor the nervousness in her demeanour. Instead, he sat down on a boulder of rock to take a breather after his long walk.
"Aren't you behaving.. weird." He commented, while drawing his sword out for display. Sephiroth took the utmost care of cleaning every drop of dragonblood from his sword's blade, since he knew it to be an acid-like liquid.
Yeah.. well.. Reunions tend to do that to a person. Along with having to put up with an assassin who has the mental abilities of a six year old. Jenova muttered, and hovered closer to her former ally. Her voice became more calm and confident with each passing moment, and she finally rested her large, tentacle-equipped frame in a shadowy corner of the cave.
"Assassin? He's a project of Shin-Ra's, I presume?" Sephiroth lifted his Masamune in a vertical position, turning the blade with a move of his wrist to check for any bloodstains. He couldn't find any, so he slid the sword back into it's black sheath.
Naturally, dear boy.. Jenova sneered, and appeared from her corner. She held a dark, pearl-like object in her tentacle. As Sephiroth's eyes fell on the orb, it began to twirl around, pulsating dark, ominous light. Threads of energy circled it, holding the orb still in the air even as Jenova let go of it.
"The Black Materia.." Sephiroth's eyes were glued to the object, as he spoke with respect in his voice.
Now, you must know what to do next.. Jenova snickered, watching as Sephiroth got up and walked over to the dark orb. He reached out his hand cautiously, as though waiting for an electric shock.
"Yes, mother." Sephiroth's said vacantly, as he grabbed the dark orb. It contained such an incredible force, Sephiroth could feel it's power flowing through him.
Like he was but paper.
Then he began to walk, to a spot through which weak rays of light streamed into the cavern. Do it. Jenova demanded. Sephiroth just stared at the beautiful crystal, watching the essence of the stone circulate like an immortal flame. Sparks like diamond dust ran across the Black Materia's surface, like stars on the fabric of the universe. Sephiroth was mesmerized by each beautiful distortion the crystal produced.
With all the power of the night, by this matter shining bright.. Jenova whispered, and a luminous beam of energy exploded around them, enveloping the two lonely figures. Sephiroth closed his eyes in devout prayer, hearing the whispers of Jenova fade out in to the background. His heart pounded heavily in his chest, and his breathing was strenuous in the immense magical energy surrounding him. While feeling the energies carry him to somewhere high up, Sephiroth murmured the last words of an ancient prayer; "I summon thee, meteor.."
Heh so Zenobius is finally beginning to remember bits about his past.. Won't take long until he remembers Aeris too. Aargh, I know. Also, I know I suck at writing Seph evil.. In fact, my whole consept of evil is cock-eyed at best. So I hope he seemed even just a little bit mean? It's actually due to my lack of evil-describing skills, that I decided to write those massive flashbacks from Aeris' POV. (The missing scenes from their latest visit at Cosmo Canyon.) I know the former of them turned out a bit smutty, but I figured what the hell. This story could use a little smut. ^_^ So now you know what sick things my mind produces. Fear me. *smirks*