Indeed, Buffy was trapped by love. Having lost the ability to act aloof
and uncaring, she spent all her time when patrolling looking for the one
who'd stolen her heart. Of course, it was just her luck that while he used
to show up when she least wanted him to that he wouldn't even be there once
when she needed him to be.
The one time she did spot him, it was from afar. He didn't see her as he carried his brown paper bag of stolen blood bank blood towards his crypt. As soon as she saw him, her heart once again skipped a beat and she almost called out to him. That is, until she remembered what had happened in his crypt. She still didn't understand what had happened, but she told herself he'd only acted that way because she'd woken him up and he was all cranky-vampire…or something like that. In any case, he couldn't be angry at her. He loved her.
Buffy decided to sneak up behind him and surprise him. Maybe she'd kiss the back of his neck tenderly, or maybe she's pretend to be ready to stake him and at his most vulnerable moment grab him and kiss his passionately on the lips. Originally she planned to do the latter, but her confidence dropped the closer she got to him and switched to the former. Cat-like, she crept up to him, and for a second just admired how confidently he carried himself. Then, gathering her wits, she took that last step and pressed his lips gently upon his neck.
Without hesitation, Spike swung around, and suddenly Buffy was afraid. His eyes were wild with fright…and something else. Buffy couldn't put a finger on it, but there was definitely something very wrong here.
"What are you doing?!?!" Spike yelled, more in shock than anger. "I told you to stay away! Don't you ever listen?"
"Spike," Buffy began, "I couldn't stay away. I need to tell you want I wanted to say three days ago, at your crypt. You wouldn't let me and I let it go, but I couldn't stop thinking about it, and I just need to tell you that—"
"Get out of here, Slayer, before I rip you to shreds!" He grabbed her shoulders roughly and drew her close like he was going to break her neck or drain her of her blood. That pleasant shiver that had been running down Buffy's back turned icy cold with fear, until he leaned close to her ear.
"I don't want to hurt you," he whispered, eyes darting every which way like someone might be watching him. "Pretend I'm hurting and threatening you."
Buffy knew better than to not listen to this. She'd been in enough dangerous situations to understand he was telling the truth. She began to pretend to struggle and close her eyes, pantomiming pain. "I—"
"Don't speak, just listen. You can't come around here any more. Your life is in danger as we speak, and I'm part of that danger. I love you too much to ever hurt you, but it'll make me. Run, stay away from me, and maybe it'll leave you alone. When I let go, look like I just gave you a death threat, and be angry." And he let go.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Buffy yelled. "Don't you EVER touch me again, you're disgusting. Goodbye, and I hope I never see you again!" And she turned away, but not before she mouthed, "I'm sorry" so he could see she understood. And she did understand, enough to know she had to trust Spike. But her heart was in pieces, and was swiftly being replaced by a need to find how just what the hell was going on.
**********************************************************************
Slow tears began to run down Spike's face as he watched her walk away. After a minute or so, he turned around to pick up his paper bag and finish his walk to the crypt. At least she's safe, he thought. They can't touch her now.
"WRONG!" shouted his newly acquired head-voice. The now familiar but still incredibly painful spasm ran through Spike, and he fell to his knees, clutching his stomach. He felt like his insides were being twisted inside out. He clawed the ground until his nails broke and his hands ran with blood, and still the pain insisted.
"What do you want from me?!?!"
"You know what we want from you, Spike, why are you playing at this idiotic game?"
"I will not kill her."
"You will."
"I will never hurt her."
"You will."
"I WILL NEVER KILL HER!" And amazingly the pain which he thought was the worst pain anyone had ever felt increased even more, and he began to pass out.
"You WILL kill her. There is NOTHING you can do about it. And if you continue to resist us, we shall drive you mad."
"You…can't…make…me…do…anything…"
"Maybe while sane, but who says you'll stay that way? We have powers that exceed anything your primitive mind can dream of. We shall drive you into the depths of your brain, and then you will kill her. Not because you have to, not because you want the pain to stop. You will no longer recognize those things. You will not know what you are doing, except that your mind tells you to kill the Slayer. This is your last chance, Spike. Say you're going to go kill her right after this conversation, and I promise you the pain will stop and we'll never see each other again. Say no…and I've already told you what will happen."
"Why would…the Powers That…Be want…to kill a force…of good?"
"I've already explained that, Spike, she is upsetting the balance, and that cannot happen. Now I'm going to count that three. I think it would be best for you to go kill her, but it's up to you. Are you ready?"
"Fuck…you…"
"1…"
"I'll…never hurt her…"
"2…"
"They'll…get you…"
"3."
"I love…her…"
"Goodbye, Spike."
"BUFFY!" And then he knew no more.
*********************************************************************
At the very moment he called his beloved's name before falling into darkness, Buffy was walking up the stairs to the second floor of her home. All of a sudden, a scream of anguish seemed to echo in her head. She gripped her skull, but it kept bouncing off the walls inside her mind and she collapsed in pain on the stairs. The noise woke Dawn and Willow, who came running to the top of the stairs.
"Buffy, what is it? What's wrong?" Willow gasped in fright, before dashing to her best friend's side. Dawn remained near the railing, afraid to move or even to say a word. Buffy didn't answer, but instead doubled over from the screaming inside her head. "Buffy, answer me, damnit, answer me!"
"Wha…what?" said Buffy meekly, as if from far away. She suddenly gained her senses as the scream was abruptly cut off. She jumped up and stared at Willow. "Someone's been hurt. I heard it, in my head. I know that sounds weird, but it was right there, horrific pain in my head."
Willow drew her friend close in a hug and said, "It's not weird. This is Sunnydale, remember? Weird is our specialty." Then she held Buffy at arm's length and said, "You heard them in your head, not outside?"
"Yes, exactly. But it sounded so real, so…"
"Familiar?"
"Actually, yes. Familiar. Like I know them. Like I've spoken to them before, or knew they were in danger…" Her voice trailed off.
"Buffy! Buffy, what is it? Whatever it is, you can tell me."
"Spike."
"Spike?" Dawn said, her first words since she'd heard his sister fall. "What's wrong with Spike?"
"He was acting weird. I…I saw him in the cemetery when I was patrolling. I surprised him by saying hello, and he completely turned on me. He pretended to be hurting me and started whispering things, insane things. Things about him needing to hurt me, but that he doesn't want to, and that he couldn't be around me if I wanted to stay alive. And he kept looking everywhere, like someone…or something…was watching his every move. Like he was being hunted."
"We have to help him. If he was being told to hurt you, then there's definitely something new in town." Willow looked up, surprised at how take- charge she was being. "I'm sorry. I can't ask you to do this, you're in pain."
"It's alright, Will, it's passed. But you're right, we have to find out what's going on. And now. Let me call Xander and Anya, we have to go on mass patrol to see what's up. And Will, I hate to ask, but you understand, we need every bit of defense that we have…"
"You want me to call Tara. I understand. I can call her, I know she'd want to help." And she went upstairs to make the call.
Dawn gave a little grunt of disgust. Once again she was going to be left out. No one wanted to be around her, the ex-Key, the green energy, the thing that didn't really exist. No one loved her, especially not…
"Dawn?"
She turned around abruptly and was staring right at the very serious eyes of her big sister. "What?"
"I want you with us. We need everyone, and you and Spike get along. Maybe you could help us out." Buffy noticed a skeptical glare beginning on Dawn's face. "There's no catch, and I'm not joking. I want you with us. Will you please help us?"
Dawn was too surprised to even think. Buffy was really sincere. And slowly the glare was replaced with a smile. "Of course".
Willow came back down to join the Summers girls. I called Tara, and Anya and Xander too. They'll meet us at the gate to the cemetery right now." She looked pointedly at Buffy. "You sure you're going to be alright?"
Buffy nodded. "I'm fine. I'm more than fine, I'm determined. Get your coats."
The one time she did spot him, it was from afar. He didn't see her as he carried his brown paper bag of stolen blood bank blood towards his crypt. As soon as she saw him, her heart once again skipped a beat and she almost called out to him. That is, until she remembered what had happened in his crypt. She still didn't understand what had happened, but she told herself he'd only acted that way because she'd woken him up and he was all cranky-vampire…or something like that. In any case, he couldn't be angry at her. He loved her.
Buffy decided to sneak up behind him and surprise him. Maybe she'd kiss the back of his neck tenderly, or maybe she's pretend to be ready to stake him and at his most vulnerable moment grab him and kiss his passionately on the lips. Originally she planned to do the latter, but her confidence dropped the closer she got to him and switched to the former. Cat-like, she crept up to him, and for a second just admired how confidently he carried himself. Then, gathering her wits, she took that last step and pressed his lips gently upon his neck.
Without hesitation, Spike swung around, and suddenly Buffy was afraid. His eyes were wild with fright…and something else. Buffy couldn't put a finger on it, but there was definitely something very wrong here.
"What are you doing?!?!" Spike yelled, more in shock than anger. "I told you to stay away! Don't you ever listen?"
"Spike," Buffy began, "I couldn't stay away. I need to tell you want I wanted to say three days ago, at your crypt. You wouldn't let me and I let it go, but I couldn't stop thinking about it, and I just need to tell you that—"
"Get out of here, Slayer, before I rip you to shreds!" He grabbed her shoulders roughly and drew her close like he was going to break her neck or drain her of her blood. That pleasant shiver that had been running down Buffy's back turned icy cold with fear, until he leaned close to her ear.
"I don't want to hurt you," he whispered, eyes darting every which way like someone might be watching him. "Pretend I'm hurting and threatening you."
Buffy knew better than to not listen to this. She'd been in enough dangerous situations to understand he was telling the truth. She began to pretend to struggle and close her eyes, pantomiming pain. "I—"
"Don't speak, just listen. You can't come around here any more. Your life is in danger as we speak, and I'm part of that danger. I love you too much to ever hurt you, but it'll make me. Run, stay away from me, and maybe it'll leave you alone. When I let go, look like I just gave you a death threat, and be angry." And he let go.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Buffy yelled. "Don't you EVER touch me again, you're disgusting. Goodbye, and I hope I never see you again!" And she turned away, but not before she mouthed, "I'm sorry" so he could see she understood. And she did understand, enough to know she had to trust Spike. But her heart was in pieces, and was swiftly being replaced by a need to find how just what the hell was going on.
**********************************************************************
Slow tears began to run down Spike's face as he watched her walk away. After a minute or so, he turned around to pick up his paper bag and finish his walk to the crypt. At least she's safe, he thought. They can't touch her now.
"WRONG!" shouted his newly acquired head-voice. The now familiar but still incredibly painful spasm ran through Spike, and he fell to his knees, clutching his stomach. He felt like his insides were being twisted inside out. He clawed the ground until his nails broke and his hands ran with blood, and still the pain insisted.
"What do you want from me?!?!"
"You know what we want from you, Spike, why are you playing at this idiotic game?"
"I will not kill her."
"You will."
"I will never hurt her."
"You will."
"I WILL NEVER KILL HER!" And amazingly the pain which he thought was the worst pain anyone had ever felt increased even more, and he began to pass out.
"You WILL kill her. There is NOTHING you can do about it. And if you continue to resist us, we shall drive you mad."
"You…can't…make…me…do…anything…"
"Maybe while sane, but who says you'll stay that way? We have powers that exceed anything your primitive mind can dream of. We shall drive you into the depths of your brain, and then you will kill her. Not because you have to, not because you want the pain to stop. You will no longer recognize those things. You will not know what you are doing, except that your mind tells you to kill the Slayer. This is your last chance, Spike. Say you're going to go kill her right after this conversation, and I promise you the pain will stop and we'll never see each other again. Say no…and I've already told you what will happen."
"Why would…the Powers That…Be want…to kill a force…of good?"
"I've already explained that, Spike, she is upsetting the balance, and that cannot happen. Now I'm going to count that three. I think it would be best for you to go kill her, but it's up to you. Are you ready?"
"Fuck…you…"
"1…"
"I'll…never hurt her…"
"2…"
"They'll…get you…"
"3."
"I love…her…"
"Goodbye, Spike."
"BUFFY!" And then he knew no more.
*********************************************************************
At the very moment he called his beloved's name before falling into darkness, Buffy was walking up the stairs to the second floor of her home. All of a sudden, a scream of anguish seemed to echo in her head. She gripped her skull, but it kept bouncing off the walls inside her mind and she collapsed in pain on the stairs. The noise woke Dawn and Willow, who came running to the top of the stairs.
"Buffy, what is it? What's wrong?" Willow gasped in fright, before dashing to her best friend's side. Dawn remained near the railing, afraid to move or even to say a word. Buffy didn't answer, but instead doubled over from the screaming inside her head. "Buffy, answer me, damnit, answer me!"
"Wha…what?" said Buffy meekly, as if from far away. She suddenly gained her senses as the scream was abruptly cut off. She jumped up and stared at Willow. "Someone's been hurt. I heard it, in my head. I know that sounds weird, but it was right there, horrific pain in my head."
Willow drew her friend close in a hug and said, "It's not weird. This is Sunnydale, remember? Weird is our specialty." Then she held Buffy at arm's length and said, "You heard them in your head, not outside?"
"Yes, exactly. But it sounded so real, so…"
"Familiar?"
"Actually, yes. Familiar. Like I know them. Like I've spoken to them before, or knew they were in danger…" Her voice trailed off.
"Buffy! Buffy, what is it? Whatever it is, you can tell me."
"Spike."
"Spike?" Dawn said, her first words since she'd heard his sister fall. "What's wrong with Spike?"
"He was acting weird. I…I saw him in the cemetery when I was patrolling. I surprised him by saying hello, and he completely turned on me. He pretended to be hurting me and started whispering things, insane things. Things about him needing to hurt me, but that he doesn't want to, and that he couldn't be around me if I wanted to stay alive. And he kept looking everywhere, like someone…or something…was watching his every move. Like he was being hunted."
"We have to help him. If he was being told to hurt you, then there's definitely something new in town." Willow looked up, surprised at how take- charge she was being. "I'm sorry. I can't ask you to do this, you're in pain."
"It's alright, Will, it's passed. But you're right, we have to find out what's going on. And now. Let me call Xander and Anya, we have to go on mass patrol to see what's up. And Will, I hate to ask, but you understand, we need every bit of defense that we have…"
"You want me to call Tara. I understand. I can call her, I know she'd want to help." And she went upstairs to make the call.
Dawn gave a little grunt of disgust. Once again she was going to be left out. No one wanted to be around her, the ex-Key, the green energy, the thing that didn't really exist. No one loved her, especially not…
"Dawn?"
She turned around abruptly and was staring right at the very serious eyes of her big sister. "What?"
"I want you with us. We need everyone, and you and Spike get along. Maybe you could help us out." Buffy noticed a skeptical glare beginning on Dawn's face. "There's no catch, and I'm not joking. I want you with us. Will you please help us?"
Dawn was too surprised to even think. Buffy was really sincere. And slowly the glare was replaced with a smile. "Of course".
Willow came back down to join the Summers girls. I called Tara, and Anya and Xander too. They'll meet us at the gate to the cemetery right now." She looked pointedly at Buffy. "You sure you're going to be alright?"
Buffy nodded. "I'm fine. I'm more than fine, I'm determined. Get your coats."