Chapter Thirty-Five: Everywhere I Go...I Get Slandered
"Good morrow, nobles all," Mitchie greeted the next morning at breakfast. Many of the other actors looked like death warmed over after the long and wild cast party, but the Yank seemed as cheerful as a little bird. Tom and Tim looked personally offended by her gleeful alertness.
"And what have you been drinking?" Tom asked her.
"Nothing, actually, I might ask the same of you. Does butterbeer have liquor in it or not?"
Nobody answered her.
"I thought so. It's not my fault you're all hung like a towelrack."
"What?" Tim asked.
"Hung over…y'all jes' sort of look not-awake to me."
"Must be that glorious caffiene we imbibed yesterday night, Mitchie," Julie observed, entering with yet another offensively cheerful smile. "Ah, Weasleys! I take it you slept like guilty little logs?"
"Alright, we're sorry!"
"We meant it well."
"Considering I'm allergic to Lethe's Bramble and I narrowly averted a heart attack, those good intentions are the only thing parting you from my father's wrath. Had Professor Pureblood not gotten all-noble las' night, you would have been eviscerated, parboiled and served to the hippogriffs. Alive."
"What'd they do, Julie?" Mitchie asked.
"We gave her some potion 'cause she had to kiss Pureblood. Talk about a favor gone amiss!" Tim grouched.
"And you took it, Jules? I'm surprised at you!" Both Weasleys gaped in shock at the American. "That glorious slice of manflesh's-"
"Mitchie, please!" Tom looked as if he might at any second bestow his own kidney on the tabletop.
"Does my observation offend?" she inquired, in a ludicrous imitation of the local accent.
"I'm sorry, Mitch, it's just that everyone here considers the professor in question as little better than a common slug. After last night, however, I must promote him to snail, though I fear no Gryffindor will ever harbor anything but dislike for the ferret Slytherin."
Julie loved pretending to be arrogant, as did the American.
"Oh, old House animosity?" Mitchie looked amused. "La, but you British can be silly. I tend to judge a person based on the content of his character and whther he's a dish or not, depending on which one I encounter first."
Just then, Donaghan walked in, looking reasonably awake and even whistling.
"Speaking of, there is an example of dishiness." Mitchie had returned to her most dewy-eyed, weak-kneed state. "Why Scotland doesn't invade and annex America, I'll never know."
"'Ello, ladies," Donaghan said in his lovely accent, kissing Mitchie and Julie each on the cheek. "I 'eard about y'r misa'venture with the ferret last night, Jule."
"C'est le petit dommage. It turned out okay."
"Beautifully spoken, Julie," Chloe remarked happily.
She had been teaching Julie French for quite some time and looked absolutely chipper since being notified she would be going to New Orleans. Julie assumed she would keep the secret from Aldous, and yet the black-haired wizard had not let go of the first-year's hand since the play ended. It was sweet the way he looked after his girlfriend, if a little unnerving becase of their four-year age difference to some, and Julie decided he would keep the secret even if Chloe disobeyed and told him. Donaghan, however, must not find out about the mission from Mitchie. Julie knew his protective nature far too well. The Weasley boys, obviously, must be kept in the dark as well.
The Scot took a seat next to the American after patting Julie in a brotherly manner on the shoulder.
"Las' nigh' was lots of fun, Michelle."
For a moment the Weasleys, Chloe, and Aldous looked around, wondering who Donaghan had spoken to.
"I liked it, too," Mitchie answered, holding the leather-gloved hand of the Scotwolf under the table. Then she noticed the stares. "Oh, come on, you didn't think I was actually named Mitchie?"
"Did anyone finish that paper on unicorns?" Tim asked.
"Here y' go," Mitchie said absently, tossing him a tightly wound scroll of parchment. "Do we actually get to see some today?"
"Yeah, I think so." Tom said uncertainly. "You can't always convince them to show up on schedule."
As Care of Magical Creatures class drew nearer, the whispering among the Gryffindor fifth-years grew more interesting. It was now common knowledge that only virgins could touch a unicorn, and it seemed that today's class would be providing a lot of …well, definitive proof of things.
Hagrid was grinning as they approached his class, and even the Slytherins looked more intersted than usual.
"I've got brushes fer all of yeh," Hagrid announced, holding out a box. "Yeh want ter' brush their manes an' tails wi'the long-bristled ones, and then some of yeh can curry their coats as well. Unicorns love bein' brushed, y'know."
Eagerly, most of the girls came up and got brushes, and at Hagrid's insistence the guys each accepted one as well. When everyone was suitably equipped, Hagrid led them around to a pen near the hippogriffs'.
Mitchie gasped in awe at the unicorns. There were two large bucks, several does, and even three little fawns, still spotted like baby deer were back home. She wished that she could pet them, but knew she couldn't. Everyone was whispering and glancing at Julie, especially the Slytherins. Mitchie knew about Rita Skeeter's article, and she assumed that the whole 'heir-of-Voldemort' thing was why they were so curious. Nobody was walking forward to brush a unicorn, especially not the guys.
Finally, Lucy Christie, one of Mitchie's fellow Gryffindors, the one who liked word games so much, walked forward and nervously petted the nearest doe. After the ice was broken, several girls began rushing tentatively over to pet and brush them. No guy wanted to, as that would be like admitting to unmanliness, but the little fawns began to sniff and even lick a few of them. Aldous abandoned all pretense and knelt down to pet the littlest fawn, smiling as the creature licked his face and whinnied while he groomed its' mane. Lyff Grudgett came over and watched him do this.
"That little Frenchie isn't good for much, I take it?"
Aldous stood up, anger showing in his eyes.
"What did you say?"
"Well, what's the good of cradle-robbing if you can't even-"
There was a low 'thwack' as Aldous broke Lyfften's nose. As the Slytherin leaned up on his elbows, the biggest buck came over and nuzzled his head. The other Gryffindor boys burst into laughter. Hagrid sent Grudgett off to the hospital wing with Jeremy and Jennifer Blodgett, (neither of whom were petting the unicorns anyway,) and gave Aldous detention for a week. Aldous didn't look as if he minded the punishment, as Professor Hagrid would probably just make him feed various animals, but he did seem in a fair bit of a rage about what the Slytherin had said. The big unicorn, however, sniffed at him, and his temper calmed down, by the looks of things.
Tom and Tim were working on the mane and tail of a little doe, who seemed very flattered by the attention and confused by their pretending to be hairdressers. Lucy and Hannah could be seen shooting them glances, and Mitchie's suspicions about who fancied whom were confirmed in part. She was, of course, still avoiding the quadrupeds.
She stood a little apart from the others, as did Matt Flint and Julie, until the dark-haired Slytherin stepped toward the Gryffindor. The American tried to hear what transpired between the two, but in spite of her sharp ears couldn't discern a thing. Suddenly Julie left Flint in a decided huff, walked over to the second-biggest unicorn, and boldly began to groom its mane and pet it on the nose. The unicorn licked her ear and she giggled, but the Slytherins were all standing dumbfounded. She gave Flint a cheeky little smile and let the unicorn nuzzle her.
By now there were several people obviously avoiding the unicorns, and Hagrid finally appeared to realize why this was. The poor half-giant was blushing furiously above his beard, and looked very shocked at some of the Slytherins. Mitchie saw the baleful gaze he gave her, and she couldn't do anything but walk towards him to explain it.
"Tha's alright, Mitchie," Hagrid started to say, but she pushed back her sleeve to show him the little star. "Oh, yeh mean yeh're-?"
"Yep. Werewolves shouldn't pet unicorns."
Unfortunately for Mitchie, the entire class had somehow been silent then. Judging by the stares of a few of the Gryffindors, she had just admitted her secret to more than Hagrid, and they all seemed surprised, if not shocked by it. Julie and Aldous, however, left the unicorn to come over and chat with her.
"That's alright," Aldous said in his quiet way. "I have a cousin who's a werewolf, I'm doing my end-of-year project on them. D'you suppose you could explain things to me as well?"
"Uh, okay." Mitchie realized that werewolves were much less than common here, in fact, they were probably feared and disliked as well. Judging by what Donaghan had said to her last night, even...
"When were you...uh, well, y'know-?" Julie struggled to ask.
"Oh, I wasn't." Mitchie showed her the star of the loup-garou. "My parents were both werewolves. I was born with it."
"Oh." Aldous looked rather fascinated by this. "I've never met a second-generation werewolf before."
"Well, whatever you want to know, I'll help you out with."
"Oh, a wolf, are you?" Flint drawled, coming up from behind and looking at Mitchie's star. "I was curious, as you are a Gryffindor."
"Flint, I swear, if you bother her," Julie started, hand going to her waist automatically.
"Oh, no, Miss Snape, I was merely curious." Flint was giving Julie a strange look, Mitchie noticed, not precisely fear or awe, but containing both. "I trust that my interest does not offend?"
"Not in this matter," Julie said sternly, removing her hand from her knife's hiding place. "The unicorns are friendly, I suggest you pet one yourself."
"Pardon me if I don't heed your suggestion, miss. Unicorns are not much to my liking."
"Afraid to dirty your pure blood?" Tim Weasley asked suddenly. "Or would a snake who hits girls really even care?"
Mitchie realized a crowd was gathering and pulled down her sleeve. Both Weasleys were advancing on Flint menacingly.
"I trust that Miss Snape, can, if she requires, defend herself."
"Depends from what, beasts or peasants," Hannah Stern observed.
Class was degenerating into a Gryffindor-Slytherin standoff, and Hagrid numbly suggested everyone get back to the unicorns, which the Weasleys and most Gryffindors did reluctantly. Flint and Julie, however, remained almost crouched at each other's throats.
"I wonder that such 'horny' beasts as unicorns displease you, Flint," Julie remarked in a lightly acidic tone. "Although such graceful things would probably abhor your type."
"It does not surprise me at all that they like you, Miss Snape, four-footed creatures seem to enjoy your presence."
Mitchie quietly started to walk away. Julie turned on Flint like a fury.
"If you weren't a student here, I'd slit you from toe to tip."
"Tip of what?" Flint asked.
Julie flicked him on the nose and Flint caught her by the wrist. The next thing anybody knew, Flint had kissed her and then been smacked so that his lip bled. Immediately, Tom and Tim were there, both to prevent Julie from tearing the Slytherin's face off and to call Flint several very nasty wizard words. Hagrid stepped in just before a fistfight started and bodily picked up Flint and Julie by the robes again.
"I'm takin' the both of yeh to the Headmistress abou' this!"
And with that, the half-giant hauled a kicking and insulting Julie and a sullen Flint up to Professor McGonagall's. Tom and Tim would have set in on the remaining Slytherins, but Lucy and Hannah pulled them off to groom the unicorns a little more. A moment later, Professor Potter appeared to conduct the rest of the class.
Mitchie still persisted in avoiding the unicorns.
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"Well?" Malfoy asked of the three Granger-Snapes.
"I'm grounded," Julie replied somewhat dismally.
"For a week," her mother said. "It's not as bad as it sounds."
"Considering your behavior, I think you're getting off fairly light."
"Dad, it's not like I wasn't provoked, y'know."
"Yes, Severus, she was forcibly snogged by a Slytherin!" Draco gave his friend a rather sarcastic smile. "The fact that he's still alive warrants reward for her self-control."
"I wasn't referring to smacking Matius Flint across the face, Draco, it is the fact that Hagrid carried both of them in like a pair of fighting kittens that caused her to be punished."
"Well, Dad, it's not like you can say 'alright, Hagrid, you can put me down, now.'"
"Did you attempt to?"
"No, I was trying to get free like anybody would."
"I think that warrents a week's grounding."
"Well, at least it's better than detention every other day. Professor McGonagall didn't even take points off from Gryffindor."
"She wouldn't," Draco and Severus both snorted.
"Oh, come on! She took points off when Tom an' Tim an' I offered her tunafish thinking she was Mrs. Norris in the dark."
"I wonder if she ate the tuna afterward," Draco grinned.
"That depends. Was it canned or in a salad?" Hermione asked.
"Just a can."
"Now if you'd thought to make tuna salad with peas she'd have just eaten it and let you go on your way. No celery, though, she can't abide the stuff."
"Thank you, Mummy, I will notify my partners-in-crime and we will take your advice next time we have need of it. It is so lovely to have aid to mischief from my parents."
"Don't push it, Julia," her father said.
"Well, it's not like it doesn't happen often enough in Slytherin. I mean, Dad sent me an Invisibility Cloak for Christmas in fifth year."
"Your father's tastes were always questionable," Severus observed. "How many times did I take it away from you?"
"At least eight. That time I snuck into your ingredient closet and you locked me in doesn't really count, does it?"
"You locked him in the closet?" Hermione asked.
"Yes, it was really very fortunate it's soundproof, remember August in your seventh year?"
"Daddy!" Julie exclaimed in shock.
"Yes, Severus, that was really an over-share." Draco and Julie were going furiously red.
"Well, it's not like we did anything but experiment with caddisflies and dragon's blood that entire month."
"Hermione!" Draco exclaimed, covering his ears. "I don't want to hear about that kind of thing!"
"What's so bizarre about caddisflies?" Julie asked.
"When combined with a heat accelerant like dragon's blood, they produce a rather notorious wizard aphrodisiac."
"Don't tell the child that!" Severus cried.
"Well, it's not like I'll use it for anything," Julie protested. "Unless Tom and Tim really tick me off, there's no real need to give that to anyone."
"Yeah, that Scot you keep as a pet doesn't need any help."
"I'm not dating Donaghan now, Malfoy! He's been with Mitchie since the night she got Sorted."
"I had not heard that. Who dumped whom?"
"We made the mutual decision not to date anymore."
"Oh, well if you're so bloody civilized," Draco mocked, imitating Julie's excess of urbanity. "Why don't you start seeing Flint, then, if he's so bleeding keen on you?"
"I'm sorry, but I like my teeth too much for that."
"By the way, Julie, you are not allowed to date Matt Flint."
"Thanks, Daddy."
"Who was that other Slytherin you were working with in Potions?"
"Alexei? Mum, he's just...ooky. He can't even spell my name."
"Yes, 'Starcatcher' usually has that silent 'q,' you know." Draco patted Julie on the head like a little dog.
"I mean 'Julie,' he keeps switching the 'ie' to some weird letter in Bulgarian."
"Maybe you should learn the Cyrillic alphabet. We based a very important code on Bulgarian during the war, Svetlana Krum thought it up."
"Should I write my owls home from the States in code?"
"Probably. You never know what could happen when you're spying, dear." Severus looked a little nervous for a moment at the idea of his daughter joining his ex-profession so young in life. "I would also suggest you learn how to speak a foreign language uncommon to the New Orleans area, like Yiddish or Hindustani."
"I have a little Japanese from the orphanage."
"Well, then, by all means, Julie, brush it up. Another reason why I came to see the lot of you, I got an answer to that owl you suggested, Sev."
"Can she do it?"
"She's flying in tonight, I believe."
"Oh, that's excellent!" Severus looked a little bit relieved.
"Would you care to explain to us two what's going on?" Hermione asked.
"Oh, yeah. Julie's going to learn how to be imperious from my mother," Malfoy replied. "She seems quite interested in training the Dark Lady."
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"What do you think, guys?" Julie asked Chloe and Mitchie in her room that night. "I can't very well just show up in my school stuff, right?"
"I would say your dress robes, the green ones," Chloe suggested. "Old pureblood families are posh beyond belief, you know."
"Well, what would you say I wear to meet your mum?"
"You don't own anything elegant enough."
"Right."
"I think you should borrow my little black number," Mitchie offered. "You're supposed to be the freakin' Dark Lady, not a nervous little Brit meetin' 'er boyfriend's mom! Appear in character...d'you know who Madonna is?"
"Uh, I'm Protestant- oh, yeah, sure. I remember her."
"Okay. If you want to be the Dark Lady, I suggest you try to look like Madonna meets the Queen meets Tallulah Bankhead, y'know?"
"Who on earth's Tallulah Bankhead?" Chloe asked.
"Alright, ...Coco Chanel."
"Now her I understand," the French girl agreed.
"Guys, I don't think I can really do that yet. I mean, it's Narcissa Malfoy, for cripes sake! She's a celebrity and a half around here, it's scary, y'know?"
"And I s'pose the whole liking her son thing never even factors into it?"
"Mitch, that's the worst part! I have no idea how to keep from being obvious!"
"Like I told you, show up in character. She's probably going to want to start work immediately. I'll be right back."
Seconds later the American returned with the slinkiest, most disturbing garment Julie had ever seen. It was a little like the wizards' equivalent of the 'little black dress,' except that there was a lot more cloth and it seemed like dress robes only much tighter in places.
"You're about my size, try this on. I think it'll work."
Ten minutes later had Julie completely transformed from the neck down.
"C'est magnifique," Chloe observed with a look of awe. Mitchie shrugged as if this were a common thing.
"She needs makeup."
"I agree. Julie, hold still une petit moment." Chloe then pulled out all the stops in wizarding cosmetic transformation. For eleven, she knew more about makeup and hairstyles than either the Brit or the American, and within ten minutes Julie was barely recognizeable.
The convenient white streak was now balanced by somewhat outrageous eyeshadow, and Julie's eyebrows had been groomed into better shape. Having never owned more than the most basic makeup necessities, Julie wasn't sure exactly what Chloe'd done, but she was betting that at least part of it was done with that wand of hers.
The only comparison Mitchie could think of to start involved the female villian in a Disney movie she'd seen when she was six years old. She wasn't sure that Chloe and Julie had ever seen 'Sleeping Beauty,' though.
"I swear, petit chat, this is art wreaked on the Brit, y'know!"
"Extempore from my mother wit, literally," Chloe replied demurely.
"Alright, now I know why you wanted to go with us." Julie gazed in shock at her reflection. "Are you booked before the ball Christmas Eve?"
"If you think this is good, wait 'til you see what my mother can do."
"You French," Mitchie observed in awe. "All I ever learned about makeup was 'don't put blush below the bottom of your nose'."
"Okay, that takes care of my looks, then. Just one more little teensy-tiny detail."
"An' what's that, Julie?"
"How the hell am I to keep from spontaneous combustion in her presence, then?"
"I think it's time to break out the jaggers, Jule." Mitchie pulled out her wand and Summoned a three-liter bottle of thorn soda. Chloe pulled three champagne goblets out of noplace as well. "Meeting Madame Malfoy is not something a girl should do decaf."
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"Julie, you look...great."
Severus glared at Draco from the corner in which he was standing.
"Kindly reattach your jaw and stop staring, Draco. That's my daughter you're ogling."
"That definitely wasn't an 'ogle,' Dad, I think that was a 'gaze of profound shock'."
"And rightly deserved!" Uncle Ron said in surprise. "Who did this?"
"Chloe."
"Then why wasn't she on m makeup crew?" Judy asked a bit petulantly. "I'm going to put her in charge next time, first-year or not. This is incredible."
"If a little ostentatious," her father observed in his ironic way. "I do hope this isn't your idea of what Voldemort should look like."
"I never said this was how I thought Voldemort should look. This is how the Dark Lady looks, because I say so."
"Perfect," a voice announced. "Just the key."
"Er, Julie," Draco started. "This is my mum."
Narcissa Malfoy looked like what would happen if Grace Kelly suddenly became the owner of the free world entire. Despite all the skill America and France had contributed to her makeover, Julie still felt like a rake-ribbed, knock-kneed Cockney street rat in her presence.
"It's...really a pleasure to meet you, ma'am," Julie stuttered with a proper curtsey, praying that her voice wouldn't squeak too much. Being a Snape did you absolutely no good if you were fifteen and terrified. Somehow she was going to sound like a mouse.
"No. Never greet visitors. Raise your eyebrow and scan them as if they were all clods of dirt. When they have bowed to you, you nod. Not bow, nod. Unless they are anything less than exactly what you ordered, in which case you inhale through your nose. Never smile when someone enters unless they happen to be carrying the bleeding severed head of your enemy. Understand?"
"Yes, ma'am!" Julie responded, perfectly terrified.
"No, it isn't 'yes.' It is 'all right then.' You are never satisfied. And there is no title worth mentioning save your own. Should the King of England walk in, you say 'hi, Chuckie.' Never look surprised or open your eyes any wider than when you're half-asleep. You are bored always. Is this clear?"
"All right then," Julie answered lazily, glancing away.
"Better. Where on earth are your bodyguards?"
"The tallish redhead and the blond to your left are them."
"No. Your answer to any inquiry regarding your own safety is never the truth. Nor do you ever admit you even require bodyguards. Now where on earth are they?"
"All eleven, right here," Julie replied, flexing her fingers and twirling her wand between the first three on her left.
"Good. I understand you're Severus and Hermione's little girl."
"Mm-hm." Narcissa raised an eyebrow and Julie tried again. "Pardon me, 'little'?"
"Good. I think that's enough lessons for right now." Suddenly the icy look melted into the sweet grin her son had inherited and Julie relaxed just a bit. "I think you'll do well as a Dark Lady." The regal blonde moved toward the other adults present. "She has your tricks, Severus, and has nearly perfected them."
"And which tricks are those, Narcissa?" Snape asked, kissing the hand of the Slytherin queen in an accustomed way.
"Power. She exudes it from every pore. And when did you teach her your delivery?"
"That, I fear, is as inherent to we Snapes as the notorious stare of ice is to you Armfeldts. Your boy here has been useful in imparting that."
"Has he behaved well? I had the impression from his letter that our two progeny are on –let us say, not the best of terms?"
"You heard of the dramatic event yesterday night?"
"Of course."
"Casting for the comedic leads was in a word, ideal. Almost too close for comfort, if you take my meaning."
"I sincerely doubt anyone possessed of such good wit as her parents would be drawn to someone with as poor a sense of societal necessity as his father."
"Indeed, Narcissa, it is from thence that most of their best clashes emerge. You have doubtless been informed of my daughter's unfortunate upbringing?"
"I have. And forgive me for saying so, Severus, but I suspect that may prove helpful in this new venture."
"For the Dark Lady, yes, but it would look ill if she unceremoniously murdered her patrician bodyguard."
"Dear Severus, no!" Narcissa smiled an airy laugh. "That would be in perfect character."
"Mother, surely you aren't saying I'm as bad a pureblood as the students would have some believe?" Malfoy asked almost petulantly.
"No, Draco, I don't think anyone could estimate the depth of your snobbery. However, considering the unfortunate circumstances of your youth at home, I fear I can only blame myself for not controlling your father more. This is not seemly; we can discuss it another time."
The slight creaking of a door broke the heavy silence. It turned out to be Hermione surreptitiously entering.
"Hello, Mrs. Malfoy," she greeted as nervously as her daughter had.
"For Merlin's sake, can't you learn to call me 'Narcissa' yet?" the great lady asked, moving quickly to shake the professor's hand. "I've just seen your daughter's capabilities; wonderfully like you and her father have. She has your eyes. Tell me, how are you and Sevvie doing lately?"
'Sevvie?' Julie thought. She was getting the odd impression that Narcissa Malfoy considered herself her father's 'big sister.' The complicated relationships of the wizarding society were starting to make her mind boggle. She could also tell that her mother hadn't quite gotten used to the patrician blonde.
"Oh, quite well, really. Thank you for asking."
"I've been hearing such wonderful things about your research this year, as well as your daughter ...and the semi-scandal at Halloween. Pardon my language, but isn't Rita Skeeter a flaming bitch?"
That was it. Narcissa Malfoy had won over the female Granger-Snapes. The only person not laughing hysterically was Hagrid's pet rat, Squidgy. In his cage, the creature trembled.
"Well, let's not stand around in the entrance hall all evening," Severus announced. "Though I must say, that was quite the suitable word in her case."
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Still giggling a bit from what had transpired at dinnertime, Julie began to scratch out an account of the evening in her journal. It was geniunely bizarre how Mrs. Malfoy could consider her mum an absolute equal and Draco an inhabitant of the 'kids' table,' but Julie was chalking that up to her parents being at least fourteen years apart. Even more curious, however, was the way she had been treated through the course of the evening. Every member of the 'mission' had been present, as well as their spouses or fiancees and the Headmistress, as well as Hagrid, who was there to discuss with Narcissa, Draco and Uncle Ron the possibilities for the Dark Lady's familiar. It had been decided, of course, that Nagaina, Draco's pet, would do quite nicely, especially as Julie's Parseltongue would draw a resemblance to Nagini, the infamous familiar of Voldemort. This had been Julie's suggestion, which Narcissa praised and decided would be for the best.
Chloe and Mitchie had arrived in the Great Hall shortly after the party of others did, as members of the mission, and Julie doubted if they would have said three words to anyone but her had not Narcissa purposely included them in conversation. It was as if Draco's mother had done research to know just the right questions to ask and the right things to say; inquiring after Chloe's parents at their winter home in France and pressing Mitchie for details about her hometown. Indeed, her interest in Mitchie had been the surprise of the evening, as Mrs. Malfoy knew a lot about the now-deceased Tylers, who had been international spies as well. It seemed that Mitchie's parents had come over to England after the fall of Voldemort and aided in the detection of refugee Death Eaters. Narcissa related her brief acquaintance with Mitchie's mother and father at the table, who sounded like the kind of inseparables Julie's own parents were. It was obvious from the way her new friend had acted that she had not been told very many good things about her parents, in fact, judging from the way she kept her star covered self-consciously since Hagrid's class with the unicorns, it was likely that wizard orphans had considered her second-class because of her lycanthropy. Narcissa Malfoy had made it sound like she was personally pleased to have the daughter of John and Cassandra Tyler going with her son, just as much as she made Chloe and Julie feel like needed scions in this grave mission.
The other surprise had been the queenly lady's vast humor. Julie supposed that being married to Draco's father had sort of made that a requirement, but even she was unprepared for the unabashed 'bashing' of every undesirable factor from Rita Skeeter to Santa Anna de Diablo. As if that hadn't been bad enough, the sacred cows of wizarding Britain had one by one been mercilessly milked, starting with a heated condemnation of the subservience of house-elves. Julie was sure at that point that Mrs. Malfoy had pre-researched this, as house-elf liberation was one of her mother's pet projects.
"Honestly, I keep expecting Tibby to offer me his own arm cooked buffalo-style someday. I've been trying to pay him since Lucius passed away, but the poor dear's still afraid of his own shadow."
"I think that house-elves should be made literate," Hermione had offered, to which suggestion Narcissa nodded whole-heartedly.
"Most decidedly. And if they don't grasp why, then they can be told that we require stenographers and bookkeepers. They'll be overjoyed."
"And then you give them books like Locke and Jean-Jacques Rousseau to read."
"Precisely."
"Are y' sure y' aren't American, Mrs. Snape?" Mitchie had asked in her Pittsburgh twang, causing the entire table to crack up like a Muggle crisp.
Yes, it had been a very nice evening, even if Julie considered the sheer terror Narcissa's conversation with her dad had been. Merlin, if they only knew! It was so dead frightening there for one second Julie was certain the considerate floor would swallow her whole right then. But it had not and Miss Parkington –Aunt Judy's slightly age-innapropriate casting had been shrugged off after she and Draco had a couple of very small arguments. True, considering Malfoy had just played half of a couple who had literally argued themselves into loving one another, it had not done much to get rid of her father's Draco-pointed glares. But then, she wasn't the one getting glared at now. So there! It was about time she got a vacation from those threatening looks.
Just as she was finishing a fairly funny anecdote from the private feast, Julie heard a little 'scritching' sound from her ferret's cage. She put down her pen to go and pick up her date.
Literally.
She petted Draco behind the ears and placed him on the floor. He instantly blurred back into the blond man in evening dress. But his expression was worried.
"I found this in the Slytherin common room."
It was a printed semi-tabloid newsletter, authored by Lyff Grudgett and the Blodgett twins. The biggest headline was 'Julie Voldemort Assaults Matius Flint.'
"I could kill them."
"I'll do better. Act like you don't know." Draco gave Julie a devious smile and kissed her gently on the cheek. "Mum was quite impressed by you, Julie-girl."
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A/N: I'm sorry these past two chapters took so long, but my 'net was down for a week and I wound up having to split one into two while I waited to upload this past few days. By the way, there's an in-joke buried in this chapter...has to do with the Yank and why she's called what she is...forty house-points if you get it, I'll explain everything next chapter.
Brain surgery in a few days...la, what fun. I'm going to write non-stop to keep my mind off of things. It's helpful. I've also started getting these wonderful emails in addition to just reviews, one just to hope I get better soon. My seizures are now pretty much controlled, and the surgery should have my vision back to rights again. (Though I've worn glasses ever since I was three, 'rights' still isn't exactly perfect twenties now.) If anybody has any really good ideas (like Aemos, who's just fixed a great hole I had in my plot outline,) please let me know. I've only got the skeleton of the story, it needs some fattening up.
Will post again as soon as possible.
-J. McN.