31. …Lockhart was Smarmy, but Cute
"Maybe I could do something to his water dragon. The boy is unnaturally attached to
it." Blaise just groaned and rolled Lucius over so that he was on the bottom. She was not
looking forward to starting school in two days, because she was sure that Lucius would
not go unnoticed if he were to visit her bed. Of course, Lucius did have a certain amount
of power over at Hogwarts, so who knew…
"No," Blaise managed in gasping breaths. "That's too easy."
"You're right." Lucius looked remarkably unmoved by Blaise's gyrations. He was deep
in thought. "Maybe…no…" The lines in his forehead deepened as he scowled.
"Wait!" he yelled, suddenly sitting up. "That's it!" He clumsily shoved Blaise off his lap
and scrambled off the bed. Blaise screamed, hitting the ground with an inelegant
THUNK.
Snape had done the only thing he knew how to do, and withdrawn the small flask of
Ogden's Firewhiskey he sometimes kept in his robes. He poured a dollop in Hermione's
lemonade. As for himself, he was feeling pleasantly warm, both from the alcohol in his
stomach and the amusing story that Miss Granger was telling him.
"…and so I had to spend three weeks in the hospital wing because I had accidentally used
cat hair!" She giggled to herself, and Snape joined in the laughter.
"I cannot believe," he choked out, "that a person of your intelligence would ever believe
that Mr. Malfoy was the Heir of Slytherin!" He looked pointedly at Draco, who was
currently engaged in a spitting match with Ron. This sent him into a laughing fit as he
slugged back another mouthful of whiskey.
"I know, I know," Hermione admitted. "It's ridiculous. Draco would never let somebody
tell him what to do like that. And he's not nearly subtle enough to write secret messages
and not blab to everyone that he was the culprit." Inside, she was a bit torn. She was
somehow relieved that Draco had put his robes on again, but she had also been
appreciating the view. After all, if he looked like that after being immersed in freezing-
cold water… She shook her head furiously.
"Something wrong, Miss Granger?" Snape asked.
"Uh. No." She answered.
Snape blinked, then shrugged as if to say: Whatever.
Ron began to shout. "I win! I win! YOU LOSE, MALFOY!" he began a clumsy dance
and toppled off the bounder that he was standing on. Draco glared at him and stalked
over to the blanket.
"What?" he asked, noting Hermione and Snape's questioning stares.
Harry and Ginny were watching all of this out the window of Gryffindor tower,
thoroughly confused.
"I don't get it," Ginny said. She grabbed the Omnioculars from Harry and put her eyes to
it. She could see Ron doing what looked like a victory dance around the picnic blanket,
and Hermione, Snape, and Draco taking occasional drinks out of a flask.
"It looks like Draco and Ron are friends," she finished, munching a scone. Harry
grumbled.
"Something happened at Malfoy Manor that they're not telling us," he said. "And I think
I have an evil idea."
"Ooh, what?" Ginny had entirely given up pretending to be the sweet, innocent, naïve
little Weasley that most people thought she was.
"Well, to get back at Ron for messing in my love life…I say we figure out some way to
learn just what went on between Draco and Ron that they're not telling us…"
Ginny became suddenly businesslike. "I know just the spell for that."
A sudden rainstorm had driven the picnic inside, and Ron and Draco had gone up to
Gryffindor tower to continue their masculine rivalries with a game of Wizard's Chess.
Snape was doing whatever Snape did, supposedly preparing his lesson plans for the new
term. Hermione was sitting by the fireplace reading. She had already read all of the
textbooks for next term, and re-read all the books she had. Luckily, she had found a copy
of Gilderoy Lockhart's "Holidays with Hags" shoved behind her Ancient Runes book.
Hermione sighed. It was true that Lockhart had been really, really smarmy, but he was
just so darn cute…However, she was rather glad that Remus Lupin had been re-hired as
the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. He gave the best lessons, and was the nicest
Professor by far.
The hag jumped at me, her sharp yellow teeth bared in a horrible grin. I merely smiled
charmingly at her and continued combing my hair. This startled the fiend so much that
she tripped over a loose floorboard and went careening into the wall. When finished with
my beauty ministrations, I dispatched her quickly with the Vanishius curse. The
townspeople were so thankful that they showered me with money and presents, while I
gifted the mayor with a signed copy of "Magical Me."
"Checkmate!" Ron said triumphantly, as a small and furious battle began on the
chessboard.
"Fine. You win." Draco slumped back in his chair, leaning precariously on the two back
legs. He was startled when a pitch-black owl swooped into the room and deposited a
letter in his lap. He opened it gingerly, noting his father's seal.
Draco –
I have received word from the Parkinsons that their daughter Pansy is hopelessly in love
with you. Why, I cannot imagine, but I have taken the liberty of arranging a marriage
between the two of you that will take place immediately after graduation.
Sincerely,
Lucius Malfoy
P.S. Did you know that Ms. Zabini has the most talented naval? I placed an olive in it
and she could pop it out and catch it in her mouth! I certainly hope that she showed this
unique trick to you.
Draco snarled and crumpled the letter in his hand as Ron looked on quizzically. His
father wanted to arrange a marriage for him, did he? He would never consent to marry
Pansy, and he was going to find a way out of it if it killed him.
"Maybe I could do something to his water dragon. The boy is unnaturally attached to
it." Blaise just groaned and rolled Lucius over so that he was on the bottom. She was not
looking forward to starting school in two days, because she was sure that Lucius would
not go unnoticed if he were to visit her bed. Of course, Lucius did have a certain amount
of power over at Hogwarts, so who knew…
"No," Blaise managed in gasping breaths. "That's too easy."
"You're right." Lucius looked remarkably unmoved by Blaise's gyrations. He was deep
in thought. "Maybe…no…" The lines in his forehead deepened as he scowled.
"Wait!" he yelled, suddenly sitting up. "That's it!" He clumsily shoved Blaise off his lap
and scrambled off the bed. Blaise screamed, hitting the ground with an inelegant
THUNK.
Snape had done the only thing he knew how to do, and withdrawn the small flask of
Ogden's Firewhiskey he sometimes kept in his robes. He poured a dollop in Hermione's
lemonade. As for himself, he was feeling pleasantly warm, both from the alcohol in his
stomach and the amusing story that Miss Granger was telling him.
"…and so I had to spend three weeks in the hospital wing because I had accidentally used
cat hair!" She giggled to herself, and Snape joined in the laughter.
"I cannot believe," he choked out, "that a person of your intelligence would ever believe
that Mr. Malfoy was the Heir of Slytherin!" He looked pointedly at Draco, who was
currently engaged in a spitting match with Ron. This sent him into a laughing fit as he
slugged back another mouthful of whiskey.
"I know, I know," Hermione admitted. "It's ridiculous. Draco would never let somebody
tell him what to do like that. And he's not nearly subtle enough to write secret messages
and not blab to everyone that he was the culprit." Inside, she was a bit torn. She was
somehow relieved that Draco had put his robes on again, but she had also been
appreciating the view. After all, if he looked like that after being immersed in freezing-
cold water… She shook her head furiously.
"Something wrong, Miss Granger?" Snape asked.
"Uh. No." She answered.
Snape blinked, then shrugged as if to say: Whatever.
Ron began to shout. "I win! I win! YOU LOSE, MALFOY!" he began a clumsy dance
and toppled off the bounder that he was standing on. Draco glared at him and stalked
over to the blanket.
"What?" he asked, noting Hermione and Snape's questioning stares.
Harry and Ginny were watching all of this out the window of Gryffindor tower,
thoroughly confused.
"I don't get it," Ginny said. She grabbed the Omnioculars from Harry and put her eyes to
it. She could see Ron doing what looked like a victory dance around the picnic blanket,
and Hermione, Snape, and Draco taking occasional drinks out of a flask.
"It looks like Draco and Ron are friends," she finished, munching a scone. Harry
grumbled.
"Something happened at Malfoy Manor that they're not telling us," he said. "And I think
I have an evil idea."
"Ooh, what?" Ginny had entirely given up pretending to be the sweet, innocent, naïve
little Weasley that most people thought she was.
"Well, to get back at Ron for messing in my love life…I say we figure out some way to
learn just what went on between Draco and Ron that they're not telling us…"
Ginny became suddenly businesslike. "I know just the spell for that."
A sudden rainstorm had driven the picnic inside, and Ron and Draco had gone up to
Gryffindor tower to continue their masculine rivalries with a game of Wizard's Chess.
Snape was doing whatever Snape did, supposedly preparing his lesson plans for the new
term. Hermione was sitting by the fireplace reading. She had already read all of the
textbooks for next term, and re-read all the books she had. Luckily, she had found a copy
of Gilderoy Lockhart's "Holidays with Hags" shoved behind her Ancient Runes book.
Hermione sighed. It was true that Lockhart had been really, really smarmy, but he was
just so darn cute…However, she was rather glad that Remus Lupin had been re-hired as
the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. He gave the best lessons, and was the nicest
Professor by far.
The hag jumped at me, her sharp yellow teeth bared in a horrible grin. I merely smiled
charmingly at her and continued combing my hair. This startled the fiend so much that
she tripped over a loose floorboard and went careening into the wall. When finished with
my beauty ministrations, I dispatched her quickly with the Vanishius curse. The
townspeople were so thankful that they showered me with money and presents, while I
gifted the mayor with a signed copy of "Magical Me."
"Checkmate!" Ron said triumphantly, as a small and furious battle began on the
chessboard.
"Fine. You win." Draco slumped back in his chair, leaning precariously on the two back
legs. He was startled when a pitch-black owl swooped into the room and deposited a
letter in his lap. He opened it gingerly, noting his father's seal.
Draco –
I have received word from the Parkinsons that their daughter Pansy is hopelessly in love
with you. Why, I cannot imagine, but I have taken the liberty of arranging a marriage
between the two of you that will take place immediately after graduation.
Sincerely,
Lucius Malfoy
P.S. Did you know that Ms. Zabini has the most talented naval? I placed an olive in it
and she could pop it out and catch it in her mouth! I certainly hope that she showed this
unique trick to you.
Draco snarled and crumpled the letter in his hand as Ron looked on quizzically. His
father wanted to arrange a marriage for him, did he? He would never consent to marry
Pansy, and he was going to find a way out of it if it killed him.