Summary: Barbara and Dick play for high stakes.

Note: I spotted this Challenge ages ago and started it, but never finished it. It goes way beyond the word limit, I'm sure, but since it's years late, what the heck. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: All the characters are owned by DC Comics and Time/Warner; this is an original story that does not intend to infringe on their copyright. Feedback is welcome!

Copyright: February 2003

Battleship

By Syl Francis

"So have you figured it out yet?"

Dick sighed. No, I haven't, Miss Know-it-all Oracle, he wanted to say. Instead, he gave her one of his disingenuous smiles, which revealed nothing.

"B-24."

At Barbara's look, he knew that he'd struck pay dirt.

"Hit," Barbara mumbled.

"What? What was that, Babs? I didn't quite get that. Did you say, 'Hit'?"

Barbara stuck her tongue out at him. She studied her monitor. So far, she'd had nothing but misses. Where had the former Boy Wonder hidden his fleet, she wondered? The placement of her misses soon began to reveal a pattern, and Barbara's features lit up as she realized what Dick had done.

"G-32," she said, her eyes glinting in triumph. Dick's gasp told her all she needed to know.

"Hit!" he grumbled, and then quickly took his own turn. "B-25!"

"Miss!" Barbara called gleefully.

"A miss? You're cheating, Barbara Gordon!" Dick exclaimed. "You always cheat!"

"Calm down Short Pants. And I so don't ever cheat."

"Do too."

"Do not."

"Too."

"Not."

"Oh, yeah? How about the time you reprogrammed the electronic chess game?"

"I never--!"

"Did too!"

"Well, Mr. Smarty-Short Pants! How about all the times you dealt from the bottom during 'Go Fish'?"

"Are you still complaining about that? I was only nine! Could I help it if you were such an easy mark?"

"Easy!?" Barbara glared green daggers over her battle board. "Listen, Hunk Wonder. I may be a lot of things...but I'm not easy! H-32!" She waited a beat, and then said smugly, "Go on...say it!"

"You sunk my battleship," Dick sighed. Giving him a triumphant look quite devoid of pity, Barbara pushed her wheelchair away from the game table.

"The keys are on the kitchen counter," she called out blithely. "I want the Hummer washed, waxed, and detailed." She paused at the bedroom door and gave him a meaningful smile. "And back before six tonight. I have a dinner date."

"You have a dinner date?" Dick demanded. "You mean, I have to wax your car, so that you can go out on a dinner date?" He stood hands on hips, exuding Bat-attitude.

"Of course, Hunk Wonder. Didn't I tell you that the loser paid for dinner?" Dick shook his head. "Oh, must've slipped my mind," she said with a shrug. "You know, in case I lost. But since I won...well, I'm not the one who said I was 'easy,' did I?" Her smile turned suggestive. "And if you want dessert...well, you'll just to work a little harder for it."

The sounds of Dick stumbling in his haste to grab the car keys echoed behind her as she turned into the bedroom to prepare herself for that night.

The End