.Chapter 6.
Elena stood by the window of her room, looking out over the picturesque grounds of Hogwarts School. With her thumb and index finger she twirled a small clover-shaped locket that hung on a gold chain around her neck. She had just come from meeting the headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, and in a perverse sort of way the overwhelming instinct she had felt to trust the man almost served to make her more wary. Reflecting on this, she acknowledged that she had been alone with only her fear and her memories for company for much too long.
A few short days ago she had been living a life where just one lapse in concentration, just one careless word, just one tiny concession to loneliness could mean the difference between survival and death. It was going to be difficult to adjust to the idea of having friends.
But the Headmaster had been so very kind, and very helpful. He had even managed to make her laugh. Elena had forgotten how much she loved to laugh. By the sheer force of his luminous personality he had managed to make her feel reassured. Almost safe.
Almost.
But not quite. The fear was always there. She knew, deep down, that Hogwarts could only be a temporary reprieve. They would not rest until they had her. She knew by the chill that huddled next to her heart that they were out there still - searching, sniffing, hunting…
Shaking her head firmly against the direction her thoughts were taking, she turned from the window and wrenched a set of simple blue dress robes from her wardrobe. Dumping them on the bed, she set about preparing for the welcoming feast. She was angry with herself. Instead of wasting time on phantom fears, she ought to be concentrating on the trial that was immediately before her - her first meeting with her fellow teachers at Hogwarts, and even more intimidating, her introduction to a hall full of boisterous young witches and wizard students.
And then, of course, there was the Grey Eyed Man. For the umpteenth time, Elena felt her thoughts drifting back to the stranger on the train. He had been on his way to Hogwarts, so he was sure to be at the feast. But would he affect her as he had before? Wouldn't it be embarrassing if she were to loose her voice again in his presence? How had he done that to her, anyway? Had he meant to? And what if the whole thing had been her imagination? What if she was starting to loose her mind? What if she were sent away from Hogwarts as an impostor and a failure, and - ?
She felt her nervousness increasing sharply, and clamped down on her wayward imagination.
No. They were stupid thoughts, silly doubts. She could do this.
So she might have no teaching experience. She might have memories that could cripple her with despair if she ever gave herself over to them entirely. She might even be going a little mad. But she had two weapons. For one thing, she was actually very knowledgeable about her field, and she was a good Charmer. She would be good at this job. And secondly, she was strong. Stronger than she had ever dreamed she could be.
She didn't know why Dumbledore had offered her this position, but she did know that she couldn't have kept running forever. This job might yet be her lifeline.
She wasn't about to blow this chance.