.Chapter 10.
It was Snape,
ultimately, who brought Remus back down to earth.
He had been so
totally absorbed in the enigma that was Elena Greenstone that he had, for an
hour at least, forgotten all about his own problems. His own … restrictions. Never in his life had he experienced anything quite like her. She represented such a fascinating
collection of paradoxes: of confidence and shyness, openness and evasion,
intelligence and naivety, hostility and warmth.
Warmth. Now there was a word he couldn't help
associating with her. Or if not with
her, exactly, then with his reaction to her. That he was attracted to her he saw little point in denying. And he had fought attraction, even lust,
many many times before. But with Elena
it was something more, something he could only describe as … heat. When she was around, something inside him
ignited – a fire that touched every level of his consciousness, filling all of
the cold places inside him with heat and light. And for once in his life he had absolutely no desire to
analyse what he was feeling.
But no sooner
had Elena left his side after the feast, claiming weariness after her journey
that morning, then the glow faded and the realities of his situation began to
hit home.
Professor
Snape, a man Remus had never gotten along particularly well with, caught his
eye and raised a sardonic black eyebrow, glancing meaningfully at Elena's
retreating back. The implication was
obvious. What exactly do you think
you're playing at, Lupin?
Turning his
face away, Remus grimaced painfully. Had he really been so obvious? Thinking back on the evening, he realised that he had. Only someone blind, deaf and dumb could have
failed to notice his interest in the new teacher. For Merlin's sake, he hadn't been able to take his eyes off her all
night! And neither of them had spoken
above a dozen words to any one else at their table. If he had shouted his infatuation from the astronomy tower, he
couldn't have made it more obvious…
Hell's curse,
he was a werewolf. Had he
forgotten that? He could not
permit himself to fall in - To get
involved with a woman. Certainly not a
woman as complicated and secretive as Elena Greenstone, and most definitely
not a woman who did not know what he was.
A horrible
coldness began to settle around his heart. What had he been thinking? He
was going to have to see this woman every day for the next year. If he let himself think, even for moment,
that there could ever be anything between them…
"Remus," a
quiet voice at his elbow intoned.
He spun
quickly, and found himself facing an uncommonly grave-looking Dumbledore.
"If you don't
mind, Remus, I would like a word with you, in private. It concerns a rather serious matter. Is now convenient?"
Remus nodded
mutely, his thoughts swirling and his stomach tightening in apprehension. Had Dumbledore noticed his undeniable
penchant for the new teacher? Did he
disapprove? How could he not?
Or was he
finally going to reveal the real reason for his mysterious summons? Remus remembered the letter he had received. For your safety, and for ours…
Raking a hand
through his thick grey-flecked hair, Remus suppressed a bewildered sigh, and
followed Dumbledore from the room.