Title: Devastating Past
Author: Valerie
E-mail: funbreath@msn.com
Disclaimer: they don't belong to me
Summary: AU Angel is new at Sunnydale High. He meets Buffy and the gang. They think he's just a regular kid. Not likely.
Timeline: during season 2 of BTVS...sorta. Let's just say that Buffy and the gang are in their Junior year in Sunnydale High.
Spoilers: as far as alternate universe goes...almost nothing. References on demons from BTVS and Angel from time to time, but that's about it
Rating: R
Distribution: You can take it but ask me first please.
Feedback: That's a big big big yes!!!!! It's my first fic, so please?
*********
6.
"Angel! Angel wait!" Buffy exclaimed, seeing Angel leaving school at the end of last class the next day. He stopped and turned around, waiting for her to catch up with him.
"Hey." He murmured softly. He felt guilty for what he told her the day before when she was trying to be nice with him. He was afraid he had screwed up the little that was going on between them.
"Are you ok?" she asked with a concerned smile, facing him.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Look, Buffy...I wanted to apologize for yesterday. I-I didn't mean to be unpleasant. I appreciate your concern."
"It's alright, I'd be a little upset too if something like that happened to me." She replied, grinning, as they resumed their walk home.
"I guess, but I should learn to control my emotions once in a while."
"Come on, you say that as if your life was at stake or something. It was fun. Utterly embarrassing, I admit, but how many times does this kind of situation happen anyway?" She asked, chuckling.
"About everyday." He replied seriously. Buffy raised an eyebrow at him, stunned.
"Really?"
"yeah. I'm used to it though. But yesterday was different.that guy started telling the story in front of everyone...I mean, I'm sure your friends are great, but I don't know them at all. Kristie's the only one who knows everything about me. I never share my feelings with anyone but her."
"Well, you kinda shared stuff with me, too last Friday." She pointed out.
"You're different." He turned his head towards her as they were walking and their eyes locked. "Most people who learn that my parents abandoned us and died when we were kids...and that I've sorta lived the past 6 years in the streets...they have that look in their eyes."
"That look." She didn't understand.
"It's pity. It makes me feel weak...helpless and vulnerable. I hate it." He explained, sighing. "But you didn't do that last Friday. After you saw us arguing...there wasn't any pity in the way you were looking at me. And trust me, I've learnt to recognize it. It feels easy to talk to you. Kristin's the only one who I feel that with...well, now there's you, too."
She smiled, slightly blushing. "I guess I can relate. I'm not saying I know what you're going through, cause I honestly don't. But I've got a weird life, too. My parents got divorced last year, I've had a hard time dealing with the new situation. I'm still not quite sure I'm alright with it. I miss my father and my mom turned into full overprotective mother mode."
Angel said nothing for a moment. He wanted to comfort her. It was a weird feeling, because he didn't care if he was happy, as long as she was.
"You miss your life before they divorced. When everything was easy. I do too." After that, they fell into a comfortable silence, resuming their walk to Buffy's house. Slowly, Angel reached out and took Buffy's hand in his. He didn't dare look at her to see her reaction, so he kept his eyes on the road, but he released a breath he didn't realize he was holding and his lips curved into a small smile when she squeezed his hand back.
"So, you're staying at Kristin's tonight?" Buffy asked when they stopped in front of her house and reluctantly pulled their hands apart.
"Yeah. She made me leave a few clothes in her room so that I could stay whenever I want. I'll go back tomorrow, though. I don't wanna intrude or anything."
"Do you..." Buffy really wanted to ask him out, but she was afraid he'd say no, so she covered what she was about to say by something a little less date-looking. "The whole gang is going out Saturday. You know...coffee, movies, Bronze. Or maybe movies then coffee and Bronze...or well we can still do"
"Buffy." He interrupted her, smiling. "You're babbling." *She's so cute.*
"Oh...ok. Huh...I was wondering if you would come with us...you know...Kristin already said yes, so..." *Why does he have to be so gorgeous? I can't form a coherent sentence when he looks at me like that*
"Are you asking me out?" He asked her, eyebrows raising slightly. His mind was screaming victory.
"Well, yeah, but out with the gang. So you can get to know them better. And I'll be there too." She clarified, blushing.
*Man, she's gonna kill me if she keeps smiling at me like that!* "I'll be there."
*****
So? When are you planning to do it?" Kristin asked her brother.
"Do what?" He demanded. His mind was really not in the conversation he was having with his younger sister. He couldn't stop thinking about Buffy. They were on their way to the Expresso Pump where they were meeting Buffy, Willow, Cordelia, Xander and Oz, and Angel's heart was making flip-flops.
"Duh! Kiss Buffy!" She replied, making it seem as if it was obvious what she was talking about.
"Oh. That." He murmured, his lips curving into a smile thinking about it. "Honestly I don't know. I've been dying to do it the whole week, but every time I'm close to her, I start shaking and babbling. I've never felt this way before."
"You're scared?"
"Yeah. I'm afraid she won't react as I want her to."
"Well...what do you want her to do?"
"I've been picturing the thing ever since I met her. You know...I'd lean over, brush our lips and start kissing her. She's respond immediately, wrap her arms around my neck...then I place my hands on her waist...then on her back holding her tightly against me...the kiss turns more passionate, and..."
"And you lower her on the bed and make love to her until she falls unconscious." Kristin flashed him a bright amused smile.
"Busted." He admitted, smiling wickedly.
"Aaww that's so cute! Who would have thought that MY big brother, the big bad vampire hunter, warrior for the Powers That Be and half vampire Angel would ever fall in love?" She chuckled.
Something snapped inside his head, a reminder of a past he would never be able to run from. "I'm NOT in love!"
"Sorry...I just meant it was new to have you fantasize on just a kiss..." She quickly amended. She had forgotten for a moment that it was not a good idea to talk about certain things.
"What can I say? I really like her. I mean, she's so hot and sexy! But...it's different from what I felt for every hot girl I've dated. It's important if she's happy...or sad...disappointed. You know what I mean?"
"Yes. You care for her. You want...to touch her...to kiss her...talk to her, laugh with her, go out on dates, make out..." She trailed off, smiling at the dreamy look on her brother's face. "You want a girlfriend, Angel. Not a one-night stand like you've had for years."
"I guess I do."
"Oh, here we are." She pointed at the Expresso Pump, totally excited. They entered the shop and walked to the Scooby Gang, who was fully represented, except for Giles. Angel immediately spotted Buffy, who was sitting between Cordelia and Oz.
*Damn!* He really wanted to sit next to her. The table they were sitting at was rather small, and he really wouldn't have minded if Buffy had to squeeze herself against him, or even sit on his lap.
"Hey guys!" Kristin greeted cheerfully, sitting next to Xander. Angel took a seat next to her, across from Buffy. He nodded with a polite smile at the hellos he received. He looked for a moment at his sister, totally amazed by the girl.
*She has changed so much.* He remarked. Back in the New York days, and even at the beginning of their life in Los Angeles, she was a lot more like her brother. She was a lot more dark and lonely, just like him. But now, he realized, she had really changed. The fact that she was living an almost normal life was certainly influencing her behavior. Now, she started to wear colored clothes, not so much leather. He felt a pang of guilt when he figured that all this was certainly because she didn't hunt vampires and demons anymore. When they were living together, with Angel's gang, she was always part of the hunting, and Angel never thought that she might not like it. It was a part of him and he enjoyed hunting a lot, because it proved him that he was important to the world. But Kristin never asked for this.
Just as he was beginning to jump into brood mode, he was pulled out of his thoughts by the light voice of his favorite blonde.
"Hey Angel." She greeted with a bright smile. "How're you doing?"
"I'm okay. You?"
"Well...so far I can't complain." She told him, her eyes sparkling.
"Which movie?" Xander asked suddenly, breaking the hypnotizing look Buffy and Angel were sharing.
"NOT a scary movie." Cordelia stated, relaxing in the arms of her boyfriend.
"Yeah, and NOT the kind of guy movie with bombs, terrorists and hot half- naked girls." Willow continued, enjoying the feel of Oz's hands on her back.
"So what? A chick flick? Please!" Xander retorted, groaning.
"Works with me." Buffy told him, chuckling.
"Yeah!" Cordelia, Kristin and Willow said in unison.
"As long as Willow is happy, I'm happy." Stated Oz.
"Angel? Please tell me you are manly enough to protest with me here!" Xander whined at the older boy.
"Huh?" He had no idea what they were talking about, seeing all he had been able to do was stare at Buffy.
"Oh, we really don't need his opinion. He hasn't been to the movies for years, he wouldn't know what he's talking about." Kristin answered for him. He received weird looks from Xander, Cordelia and Willow, who were surprised that a teenager never went to the movies.
"Yeah, like she says, whatever." He murmured, shrugging.
A few minutes later, the waiter gave them their drinks, and they started chatting happily. Angel didn't say much, he just listened from time to time, more interested in watching Buffy. However, Cordelia pushed the discussion to the subject of their new friend, so he had to follow the whole thing.
"So Angel...do you do any sport? Cause with THAT body, I'm guessing you didn't get it without doing anything." Cordelia asked him, receiving a jealous look from her boyfriend, and an amused smile from the girls.
"Basketball. I tried football during my first sophomore year but I dropped it after two months and I came back to basketball. Quarterbacks get way to much attention. I don't like it."
"First sophomore year?" Willow repeated confused.
"Yeah. I'm 18, I suck at school. Had to repeat my 6th and 10th grades." He explained briefly.
"Are you gonna join the basketball team here?" Buffy asked.
"I'm the head cheerleader." Cordelia informed him. "The team is really great, I'm sure you'd love it."
"I'll think about it." As Buffy listened to Angel and Cordelia talk about basketball, she felt something on her foot.
*Oh my god!* Her mind screamed. She was totally shocked when she realized it was Angel's foot on her own. She glared at him but he was talking with Cordelia and Xander. Cordelia was telling him all about Sunnydale's sport teams exploits, while Xander was giving the sarcastic comments. If the slayer wasn't sure that it was Angel's foot, she would have sworn he was innocent. He looked completely not distracted when he talked. Slowly, Angel moved his foot up, and pushed up her pants leg. She made no move to stop him, which made him smile slightly.
"What don't you like in football?" Oz asked Angel.
"Well, apart of the whole deal with getting everyone's attention, I don't like the equipment and stuff. Having to wear a helmet and everything, it's just annoying." He answered half-truthfully. There was another reason that made him deeply dislike football, but he couldn't say it to anyone and Kristin had learnt not to mention it.
"So you just did it 'cause being the star quarterback is a real chick magnet, right?" Xander told him, smirking.
"I don't need to be in a football team to get dates, man. I've got my ways on girls." He replied, looking at Buffy, who was blushing. He couldn't help but grin at that. Somewhere during the conversation, after he had caressed her ankle for a few minutes, she had returned the favor and they had both slipped out of their shoes. Their socks were as down as the other was able to lower it, so that they would be able to touch more. Angel had pushed Buffy's pants leg all the way up her calf, and the others had no idea of what was going on, as there was not even a glance exchanged between the two. They both acted like nothing was going on, it made the game more fun this way. At least for Angel, because Buffy was seriously blushing.
"All right guys, we should go if we don't wanna miss the beginning of the movie." Xander exclaimed suddenly. As everyone was getting up, Kristin noticed Buffy bending over to fix her pants leg and her sock rapidly and grinned at her brother, who was acting innocently after he had slipped back in his own shoe.
*********
Author: Valerie
E-mail: funbreath@msn.com
Disclaimer: they don't belong to me
Summary: AU Angel is new at Sunnydale High. He meets Buffy and the gang. They think he's just a regular kid. Not likely.
Timeline: during season 2 of BTVS...sorta. Let's just say that Buffy and the gang are in their Junior year in Sunnydale High.
Spoilers: as far as alternate universe goes...almost nothing. References on demons from BTVS and Angel from time to time, but that's about it
Rating: R
Distribution: You can take it but ask me first please.
Feedback: That's a big big big yes!!!!! It's my first fic, so please?
*********
6.
"Angel! Angel wait!" Buffy exclaimed, seeing Angel leaving school at the end of last class the next day. He stopped and turned around, waiting for her to catch up with him.
"Hey." He murmured softly. He felt guilty for what he told her the day before when she was trying to be nice with him. He was afraid he had screwed up the little that was going on between them.
"Are you ok?" she asked with a concerned smile, facing him.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Look, Buffy...I wanted to apologize for yesterday. I-I didn't mean to be unpleasant. I appreciate your concern."
"It's alright, I'd be a little upset too if something like that happened to me." She replied, grinning, as they resumed their walk home.
"I guess, but I should learn to control my emotions once in a while."
"Come on, you say that as if your life was at stake or something. It was fun. Utterly embarrassing, I admit, but how many times does this kind of situation happen anyway?" She asked, chuckling.
"About everyday." He replied seriously. Buffy raised an eyebrow at him, stunned.
"Really?"
"yeah. I'm used to it though. But yesterday was different.that guy started telling the story in front of everyone...I mean, I'm sure your friends are great, but I don't know them at all. Kristie's the only one who knows everything about me. I never share my feelings with anyone but her."
"Well, you kinda shared stuff with me, too last Friday." She pointed out.
"You're different." He turned his head towards her as they were walking and their eyes locked. "Most people who learn that my parents abandoned us and died when we were kids...and that I've sorta lived the past 6 years in the streets...they have that look in their eyes."
"That look." She didn't understand.
"It's pity. It makes me feel weak...helpless and vulnerable. I hate it." He explained, sighing. "But you didn't do that last Friday. After you saw us arguing...there wasn't any pity in the way you were looking at me. And trust me, I've learnt to recognize it. It feels easy to talk to you. Kristin's the only one who I feel that with...well, now there's you, too."
She smiled, slightly blushing. "I guess I can relate. I'm not saying I know what you're going through, cause I honestly don't. But I've got a weird life, too. My parents got divorced last year, I've had a hard time dealing with the new situation. I'm still not quite sure I'm alright with it. I miss my father and my mom turned into full overprotective mother mode."
Angel said nothing for a moment. He wanted to comfort her. It was a weird feeling, because he didn't care if he was happy, as long as she was.
"You miss your life before they divorced. When everything was easy. I do too." After that, they fell into a comfortable silence, resuming their walk to Buffy's house. Slowly, Angel reached out and took Buffy's hand in his. He didn't dare look at her to see her reaction, so he kept his eyes on the road, but he released a breath he didn't realize he was holding and his lips curved into a small smile when she squeezed his hand back.
"So, you're staying at Kristin's tonight?" Buffy asked when they stopped in front of her house and reluctantly pulled their hands apart.
"Yeah. She made me leave a few clothes in her room so that I could stay whenever I want. I'll go back tomorrow, though. I don't wanna intrude or anything."
"Do you..." Buffy really wanted to ask him out, but she was afraid he'd say no, so she covered what she was about to say by something a little less date-looking. "The whole gang is going out Saturday. You know...coffee, movies, Bronze. Or maybe movies then coffee and Bronze...or well we can still do"
"Buffy." He interrupted her, smiling. "You're babbling." *She's so cute.*
"Oh...ok. Huh...I was wondering if you would come with us...you know...Kristin already said yes, so..." *Why does he have to be so gorgeous? I can't form a coherent sentence when he looks at me like that*
"Are you asking me out?" He asked her, eyebrows raising slightly. His mind was screaming victory.
"Well, yeah, but out with the gang. So you can get to know them better. And I'll be there too." She clarified, blushing.
*Man, she's gonna kill me if she keeps smiling at me like that!* "I'll be there."
*****
So? When are you planning to do it?" Kristin asked her brother.
"Do what?" He demanded. His mind was really not in the conversation he was having with his younger sister. He couldn't stop thinking about Buffy. They were on their way to the Expresso Pump where they were meeting Buffy, Willow, Cordelia, Xander and Oz, and Angel's heart was making flip-flops.
"Duh! Kiss Buffy!" She replied, making it seem as if it was obvious what she was talking about.
"Oh. That." He murmured, his lips curving into a smile thinking about it. "Honestly I don't know. I've been dying to do it the whole week, but every time I'm close to her, I start shaking and babbling. I've never felt this way before."
"You're scared?"
"Yeah. I'm afraid she won't react as I want her to."
"Well...what do you want her to do?"
"I've been picturing the thing ever since I met her. You know...I'd lean over, brush our lips and start kissing her. She's respond immediately, wrap her arms around my neck...then I place my hands on her waist...then on her back holding her tightly against me...the kiss turns more passionate, and..."
"And you lower her on the bed and make love to her until she falls unconscious." Kristin flashed him a bright amused smile.
"Busted." He admitted, smiling wickedly.
"Aaww that's so cute! Who would have thought that MY big brother, the big bad vampire hunter, warrior for the Powers That Be and half vampire Angel would ever fall in love?" She chuckled.
Something snapped inside his head, a reminder of a past he would never be able to run from. "I'm NOT in love!"
"Sorry...I just meant it was new to have you fantasize on just a kiss..." She quickly amended. She had forgotten for a moment that it was not a good idea to talk about certain things.
"What can I say? I really like her. I mean, she's so hot and sexy! But...it's different from what I felt for every hot girl I've dated. It's important if she's happy...or sad...disappointed. You know what I mean?"
"Yes. You care for her. You want...to touch her...to kiss her...talk to her, laugh with her, go out on dates, make out..." She trailed off, smiling at the dreamy look on her brother's face. "You want a girlfriend, Angel. Not a one-night stand like you've had for years."
"I guess I do."
"Oh, here we are." She pointed at the Expresso Pump, totally excited. They entered the shop and walked to the Scooby Gang, who was fully represented, except for Giles. Angel immediately spotted Buffy, who was sitting between Cordelia and Oz.
*Damn!* He really wanted to sit next to her. The table they were sitting at was rather small, and he really wouldn't have minded if Buffy had to squeeze herself against him, or even sit on his lap.
"Hey guys!" Kristin greeted cheerfully, sitting next to Xander. Angel took a seat next to her, across from Buffy. He nodded with a polite smile at the hellos he received. He looked for a moment at his sister, totally amazed by the girl.
*She has changed so much.* He remarked. Back in the New York days, and even at the beginning of their life in Los Angeles, she was a lot more like her brother. She was a lot more dark and lonely, just like him. But now, he realized, she had really changed. The fact that she was living an almost normal life was certainly influencing her behavior. Now, she started to wear colored clothes, not so much leather. He felt a pang of guilt when he figured that all this was certainly because she didn't hunt vampires and demons anymore. When they were living together, with Angel's gang, she was always part of the hunting, and Angel never thought that she might not like it. It was a part of him and he enjoyed hunting a lot, because it proved him that he was important to the world. But Kristin never asked for this.
Just as he was beginning to jump into brood mode, he was pulled out of his thoughts by the light voice of his favorite blonde.
"Hey Angel." She greeted with a bright smile. "How're you doing?"
"I'm okay. You?"
"Well...so far I can't complain." She told him, her eyes sparkling.
"Which movie?" Xander asked suddenly, breaking the hypnotizing look Buffy and Angel were sharing.
"NOT a scary movie." Cordelia stated, relaxing in the arms of her boyfriend.
"Yeah, and NOT the kind of guy movie with bombs, terrorists and hot half- naked girls." Willow continued, enjoying the feel of Oz's hands on her back.
"So what? A chick flick? Please!" Xander retorted, groaning.
"Works with me." Buffy told him, chuckling.
"Yeah!" Cordelia, Kristin and Willow said in unison.
"As long as Willow is happy, I'm happy." Stated Oz.
"Angel? Please tell me you are manly enough to protest with me here!" Xander whined at the older boy.
"Huh?" He had no idea what they were talking about, seeing all he had been able to do was stare at Buffy.
"Oh, we really don't need his opinion. He hasn't been to the movies for years, he wouldn't know what he's talking about." Kristin answered for him. He received weird looks from Xander, Cordelia and Willow, who were surprised that a teenager never went to the movies.
"Yeah, like she says, whatever." He murmured, shrugging.
A few minutes later, the waiter gave them their drinks, and they started chatting happily. Angel didn't say much, he just listened from time to time, more interested in watching Buffy. However, Cordelia pushed the discussion to the subject of their new friend, so he had to follow the whole thing.
"So Angel...do you do any sport? Cause with THAT body, I'm guessing you didn't get it without doing anything." Cordelia asked him, receiving a jealous look from her boyfriend, and an amused smile from the girls.
"Basketball. I tried football during my first sophomore year but I dropped it after two months and I came back to basketball. Quarterbacks get way to much attention. I don't like it."
"First sophomore year?" Willow repeated confused.
"Yeah. I'm 18, I suck at school. Had to repeat my 6th and 10th grades." He explained briefly.
"Are you gonna join the basketball team here?" Buffy asked.
"I'm the head cheerleader." Cordelia informed him. "The team is really great, I'm sure you'd love it."
"I'll think about it." As Buffy listened to Angel and Cordelia talk about basketball, she felt something on her foot.
*Oh my god!* Her mind screamed. She was totally shocked when she realized it was Angel's foot on her own. She glared at him but he was talking with Cordelia and Xander. Cordelia was telling him all about Sunnydale's sport teams exploits, while Xander was giving the sarcastic comments. If the slayer wasn't sure that it was Angel's foot, she would have sworn he was innocent. He looked completely not distracted when he talked. Slowly, Angel moved his foot up, and pushed up her pants leg. She made no move to stop him, which made him smile slightly.
"What don't you like in football?" Oz asked Angel.
"Well, apart of the whole deal with getting everyone's attention, I don't like the equipment and stuff. Having to wear a helmet and everything, it's just annoying." He answered half-truthfully. There was another reason that made him deeply dislike football, but he couldn't say it to anyone and Kristin had learnt not to mention it.
"So you just did it 'cause being the star quarterback is a real chick magnet, right?" Xander told him, smirking.
"I don't need to be in a football team to get dates, man. I've got my ways on girls." He replied, looking at Buffy, who was blushing. He couldn't help but grin at that. Somewhere during the conversation, after he had caressed her ankle for a few minutes, she had returned the favor and they had both slipped out of their shoes. Their socks were as down as the other was able to lower it, so that they would be able to touch more. Angel had pushed Buffy's pants leg all the way up her calf, and the others had no idea of what was going on, as there was not even a glance exchanged between the two. They both acted like nothing was going on, it made the game more fun this way. At least for Angel, because Buffy was seriously blushing.
"All right guys, we should go if we don't wanna miss the beginning of the movie." Xander exclaimed suddenly. As everyone was getting up, Kristin noticed Buffy bending over to fix her pants leg and her sock rapidly and grinned at her brother, who was acting innocently after he had slipped back in his own shoe.
*********