| Author's Notes: For Ayan-kitsune
lovers, please read the Ending Notes of the chapter for lots of Ayan-kitsune
omake goodness.
Debt of Gratitude: Many thanks to Rei Eien for the help with the WK episode I needed and for the inspirational conversation. *wolfy huggles* Your help was invaluable in this chapter. Thanks again for re-watching the ep and writing the blow by blow account over chat. Echoes in the Soul
Part 2 - dungeons of the mind "What are you doing here?" Aya hissed. "Waiting for you. I was the one who sent you the email." Crawford said calmly. He slunk out of the shadows. Aya fought not to stare at the precog. Crawford was wearing jeans as if he'd worn denim all his life. And if I though him wearing leather was strange... Aya fought the inclination to stare some more. Crawford never struck him to be the type to be wearing anything but three piece suits. What game are you playing? "What are you doing here?" The thought of Aya snapped coldly. He had gotten an email for a hot lead and decided to check it out. The trash littered alley was just inside the industrial district. It took Aya several attempts to get loose from that pesky Kritiker agent to get to where he was now. It would be impossible now to the same later and to find out that he'd wasted the effort and the opportunity… Shit, he just wants to taunt me for my failure…and I'll not be able to lose Botan again anytime soon… He'll be on his guard now… Aya had only managed to elude the man because Botan didn't expect him to abandon the Porsche outside of the supermarket while the latter shopped for their food. On top of that, he still smarted from his failure to get any information. He had gotten the informant in the hospital only to have the man die before telling him anything. The man had been killed by a pro. Of that, there had been no doubt. It could've been them… They're involved, after all…or one of their lackeys… "So you show your true colors, Schwartz!" Aya pounced onto Crawford. "You're really thick-headed, aren't you?" Crawford said, dodging the attack with usual ease. He held a gun on Aya's head. Shit…checkmate…and I didn't even notice that coming… "What's to talk about? You're involved with the kidnapping of my sister and now you want to play your sick mind games with me…" Aya hadn't forgotten the last time he'd met Crawford in the bar. No matter how he'd tried to make sense of what happened then, he couldn't find a way to make the facts match so he'd put the rest of it as Schwartz methods of keeping their enemies off balance. So, here was Crawford finally getting what he'd wanted all along. "Don't be so smug, Schwartz. You got me, so what?" Aya growled. "You've got such a hard head. I didn't come here to fight you. I'm here to give you some sound advice. Go home, kittens shouldn't be away from their mother." So condescending... "You're the one to talk." Ran glared back at Crawford. Crawford flinched. It was a tiny thing barely perceptible; Aya would've missed it if he weren't so close to the precog. Oho, so this is not official business either...interesting... So Oracle has his own agenda for this meeting... Aya wouldn't have guessed it. He had chosen the words in random. At least I learned something interesting in this meeting... "Your sister is with Schreient, Weiß. Considering how much of a hard time you had the last time to subdue them, I think you'll need your teammates help, don't you?" "How do I--" "Know I'm telling you the truth? You don't, but here's something that might help." Crawford handed him a diskette. "There are some interesting data as to what they're told to do to your sister while they have her in their care. Now be a good kitty and go back to mommy." "Don't patronize me!" Aya snarled as he tucked the diskette away in a safe case in his coat. "What Weiß?" Crawford drawled back. He hadn't withdrawn the gun yet. "Why are you doing this, Oracle?" The deliberate emphasis on the code name made it a challenge. "Just because." Crawford said. He put the gun down and shoved himself at Aya. His free hand tipped Aya's face so that they were looking each other eye to eye. So is he going to take the exchange after all…in this dark alley…or is this another game… He certainly didn't intend to fire at me… Aya had gotten a good look of the gun while Crawford had put it down and knew that the man hadn't planned on any serious mayhem. "Hn…you can't fire a gun with its safety on." Aya said. "You're really sharp. But this is not a trap, you know." Crawford said, his hand ghosted over the curve of Aya's cheek before letting it drop. Of the lethal sort at least… The precog really boggled Aya. He acts cold one moment, and almost sweet the next… He doesn't seem to be the kind to be swayed by desire, either… "I wonder if even you know why you're doing this." I certainly don't have a clue… "Oh, I know why I'm doing this, Aya-kun. I am quite certain of it." The precog's tone was a soft purr of sound thrumming through out Aya's being. The world shivered a moment. He's done this before… Several times before… Huh? When? "Heh, but you're always the clever one, Hak--Aya." Reality shivered again at the almost uttered word. What were you about to call me? "I used your name 'Aya', or are you going by your real name now? Ran-kun?" Crawford smirked. Aya hadn't even known that he had voiced the question. I knew he was about to call me by another name…I just knew it… Everything was getting strange. "So till we meet again kitten…" Crawford said, ducking out of the alley. He didn't even try to kiss me… It felt disappointing that the precog hadn't tried anything. Wait a moment…disappointing…why should I be disappointed that he doesn't want anything for his assistance… It was a startling thought. I'm not attracted to Crawford… I'm not… Aya knew from experience that he was attracted to the same sex. And I'm only human… He always had been one to notice a handsome man or two and being a healthy human male had thought to act upon the impulse despite his situation. He'd had a teammate court him once, Yuushi, code-named Knight, from the Crashers, and if he'd have seriously considered a relationship with the other man that one time. The blond was extremely handsome and his golden eyes were rather entrancing. We had a close friendship, that would have been enough…and maybe in time it would've grown to something else…but it would have been folly…even without Aya-chan to depend on me… Aya had only refused with regret, knowing it would have been foolish for them to have anything knowing he'd been reassigned at anytime. Weiß hadn't offered the same distraction and he'd grown colder since he'd started killing. Aloofness was a good shield against the world and to keep the weight of the guilt from killing him. People reminded him of others, others, men and women, screaming and pleading under his sword. Yes, aloofness was a good way to avoid looking at the guilt in the face but his now much colder façade made starting a relationship much harder. Not that it was any easier for me to do in the first place… Aya had always been shy and withdrawn in the first place, self-conscious that his looks weren't typical. He had been teased for it since he was very young. Because of that, he'd prefer books and paints for company. So I never had much experience with relationships… What Crawford seems to be offering though…? Aya wondered what the precog's game was. Not that he was playing it more than was necessary. That would be quite imprudent, to say the least, and…besides, I have Sakura already… Well, sort of… Aya knew the danger they faced everyday on the field left very little room for an attachment to a 'civilian' who could not defend herself but Sakura was the first female he'd felt an attraction towards. It was the first sign that he might not be exclusively homosexual. And I was getting so comfortable with my sexual orientation, too… It took a lot out of him to admit that the interest was there. He knew that he would never be free to act upon it and that made him cautious in his dealings with the girl. Not to mention the hint of incest… I mean what does it say about me that the first female to attract my attentions looks like my sister's twin…scratch that…the only female yet to attract them… She does look too like Aya-chan for my comfort… That was something that added to Aya's discomfort. However, Sakura had no qualms on pushing the tentative attraction to its limits. So now, they had a sort of non-relationship going on. So exploring things with Crawford is not precisely being unfaithful but… All these non-relationships are giving me a headache… Somehow, Aya felt that the precog had done something more intimate in this encounter than a kiss but, damned, if he knew what it was. *** Crawford looked at the report on his hand with a mixture of trepidation and anxiety. So Weiß fell into the bitches trap… Hmmm… He scrolled down on the report fast taking note with some relief than only the youngest of the Weiß had been hurt seriously. Wait a minute… Why am I feeling this way towards the enemy? Concern fairly radiated off of him as he read the report again. This couldn't have been good for Aya, not being able to rescue Aya-chan…failing his sister yet again…for the nth time…it must really hurt, it did the last time… A vision came to him then, of despair in unfamiliar eyes. Uncomfortable silence… That's why I said the sutra then…that quiet despair…I wanted to dispel it…even then… Huh? What on earth is a sutra? Crawford shook his head. How would I know that? And what time was that… His memory couldn't come up with the exact time that event happened or what it was. I 'm not going insane! I'm not… There must be some rational explanation…but for the mean time… I'll put it out of my mind… Oracle went back to reading the rest of the intelligence reports on his desk, trying to put away the disturbing thoughts. He almost succeeded somewhere the small whisper grew a bit quieter. He put the report down and got another from his unread pile. His jaw clenched involuntarily when he saw the source of the report. It came from Schreient. It was a report dealing with the status of the sacrifice: Fujimiya Aya. Aya-chan…she looks exactly like Tomoe Sakura…or maybe that should be vice versa… The thought inevitably came to its normal conclusion, his jaw tightened even more as he looked unseeingly on the report. Tomoe Sakura…it seems she and Aya have more of a relationship than I first thought… Schuldig had delighted in telling him just that when the telepath caught him coming in from his meeting with Aya in the alley. He unclenched his teeth when he felt the beginnings of a headache but the memory annoyed the heck out of him. He had no right to put his nose in my business… *** "Why isn't it Romeo coming back from his meeting with his Juliet? Enjoy yourself, Bradley-kins?" Schuldig asked as Crawford came into the dimly lit living room. The annoying German was lounging on a couch. "Schuldig!" Crawford said as he took off his coat to hang it on the hooks set by the door. "Why Oracle I never thought you'd be the type to go for such an illicit romance! You were so preoccupied with your assignation that I managed to follow you quite easily." Crawford chose to ignore that and went past the redhead to the hallway that led to their rooms. He knew he hadn't been careless. He had taken every precaution and the only reason Schuldig could have followed him was that the man was probably in the neighborhood by chance. Doing what…I'd rather not speculate… Schuldig had some bad habits when it came with the usual vices, wine women and song, with a little perversion thrown in for variety. Crawford wasn't going to escape that easily though, Schuldig insisted following him down the hallway. What a pest... "You're so willing to 'play' with your kitten. You're really so naïve that you think he's not playing with you?" "What do you mean by that Schuldig? Not that I'm actually playing with a 'kitten'." Crawford spun around just before his door to glare at the telepath. "He's got that Tomoe Sakura, doesn't he?" Schuldig asked maliciously. He looked like he was thoroughly enjoying himself. "He and the Tomoe chick have been hanging around, oh-so-sweetly. Their dates in the park are so obvious, how could anyone miss them? They even went on the river a couple of times…" Schuldig insinuated, giving Crawford a sly sidewise glance as he projected the images to the irate precog. Sakura dragging Aya over to a picnic table in the park… Aya and Sakura eating ice cream, Sakura slowly lapping at her cone… Aya steering a small motorboat on the river with a very enthusiastic Sakura pointing at sights and rocking the boat every so often… They were all different except that in all of them was Aya looking fondly at the annoying girl. The depth of his anger surprised him. She has no right to get her claws into MY Aya…he's mine… The possessive startled him. He knew only too well that he had no claim to make on Aya. What are you talking about? You never even told him anything…at she had tried… Still there was something in him that rebelled at the thought of Aya going out with the girl. "No, I'm not that interested in Fujimiya except for his use to us for our plans." Crawford said evenly as the images came to a halt though he knew that it didn't fool Schuldig. The German telepath gave Crawford a challenging stare. He glared at Schuldig. The telepath glared back. Why am I wasting my time here? Even if I AM a little attracted to Fujimiya, it isn't helping any to be standing around in the hallway… "I have no intentions towards Fujimiya, subject closed." Crawford said, breaking off the glaring contest. He deliberately opened his door, intent on ending the discussion once and for all. "Fuck, Crawford, if this ruins our plans…" "It won't." Crawford said, shutting the door and that was that. *** Crawford acknowledged to himself that he had never experienced as much jealous anger ever as he felt at the thought of Tomoe Sakura with his Aya. Never mind that I haven't even had the ghost of a claim on him… I want him… It was undeniable. Ever since their encounter at the motel, a part of him had been perpetually whispering at him to claim the Weiß redhead. The attraction he'd felt for the man had magnified to a need to reach out and grab what he wanted--no needed--before it got away from him. I can't shake the feeling… I can't stop it or deny it any longer… He needed the man by his side. It was very disconcerting. He never felt this way before with anyone before. He'd never even thought of touching much less sex. It's as if I've found the one person…no…that couldn't be it… It was then when the vision hit him. The lines of text he was trying to read wavered before him. When everything cleared, he put the report down and started to pace. Ah, so that's it. I must change my arrangements… He now knew he'd been lying to Schuldig when he said that it wasn't going affect their plans for the future. Not when he now knew that he had a chance in getting Aya… It's going to be more interesting than I thought… We have to make sure not to kill Weiß even after our objective for them has been completed… *** Youji sipped at the can of beer as he lounged in his bed. It was nights like this without a mission that he dreaded the most. There was nothing to hold back the ghosts of his dead victims. All too well, he remembered his wire biting deep into resistant flesh and hard bone. He heard again the silent screams of his victims, their silent accusing eyes. The crimson blood splashed macabre designs upon the walls as his wire cut deep. So much red…so much guilt… Red was a color he never did like… Red, the color of blood…the color of Aya's hair…sometimes I think that his hair gets redder every mission from the blood we've shed… He usually found a willing body to help him through this, a pair of hands to soothe his worries away, a pair of breasts to bury his head in and the warmth of sex to take his awareness into oblivion but things had changed since she came. Kyoko…Asuka, I lost you again… His fingers itched for a cigarette but he didn't have and didn't really want any. He savagely drained the can at the thought. Cigarettes, now, reminded him of her and that near-fatal night together. He acknowledged the bitter truth that he didn't want to see before. She had betrayed him then and she betrayed tonight. She had told him about that dilapidated wreck of a building as a trap for Weiss…and him… Used me up and threw me away… All she cared about was Masafumi… The betrayal was fresh and the hurt deep within him. He drank and remembered. *** Youji smoked another cigarette, looking down on the shorthaired girl beside him. He gently played on a black lock, marveling at its silkiness. He stubbed the cigarette on the ashtray beside the bed, sighing. He knew what she would say to that. That one time she'd seen him smoke in bed… "Youji, smoking in bed will be the death of you." She had said. "I thought you said it would be lung cancer." He teased back, dodging away her attempts to get the cig away from him. He raised his arm as she got on his lap to try to get it. "Youji!" "Or maybe of cirrhosis…" Youji swung his legs to the other side of the bed as she rolled off him and sat up to take a swipe at the lit cigarette. [1] "Youji!" She pouted. She finally stood up and went off in a high dudgeon. "Asuka…" Youji said, after a few moments. Fun was fun but he knew well enough not to press his luck. He'd better apologize or not have any… SPLOOSH! "Asuka!" "Oops?" Asuka said, grinning unrepentantly at him as she held a dipper full of water. She backed away slowly from Youji as he grinned toothily at her. "Now, Youji…" He tackled her to the floor and tickled her silly. "Enough…Youji…!" "You surrender?" "Hai." Youji had lifted her up and brought her to the bed and they had made love after that. The memory brought a smile to Youji's face. I can't believe that I have you again...Asuka... We'll have more days like that, ne? The sparkling midnight eyes were now closed in sweet slumber. It had been quite a strange but happy day. It had been almost like that one day of a string of days that he'd taken for granted, years ago. Not again… I will not lose you again… He looked away. The intensity of his emotions almost frightened him. Moonlight streamed invitingly through the windows of the cabin, it brought up a sudden yearning to see the moonlit landscape. He opened the balcony doors and let himself out with an assassin's stealth. He gazed upon the fairytale land of moonlight on snow. It's almost too good to be real...like Asuka-chan. Everything felt surreal. Youji felt like he was in a dream. It was disconcerting, yet, if it was--he didn't want to ever wake up. Suddenly, he felt a tingle of danger down his spine. He nearly spun around on gut feeling but something forestalled him. A wire looped his neck. He struggled against the strength behind the cold garrote and lost. His body arched as weakened knees buckled at the lack of air. His vision was fading out. The last thing he saw before everything faded into emptiness was the bare black branches clawing futilely against the midnight blue sky. [2] *** 'Asuka' had claimed ignorance of what had happened then. No not 'Asuka' or Kyoko even, give her the proper name, the only name her loyalties had shown her to be… Neu… Youji knew he needed to let go of the memory. He knew he had to, for his own sake and the team but he couldn't. He couldn't forget Asuka, couldn't forget the accusation in her eyes. Silently echoing… You took Masafumi-sama away from me! I will never forgive you… Guilt strong and pure came to him. It resonated deep within him and followed him in his dreams. So much blood…so much red…and accusation in a woman's eyes… *** It's just another mission though a self-appointed one. They were going to retrieve Aya's sister from the Schreient. Aya tried to still his heartbeat as they came to the mansion. They had come in stealthily to find themselves in a sort of arena like area. Schreient gloating at them...Aya is not here. There will be no escape now. Then the trap sprung and Omi and Ken fell. "Omi's hurt." Ken said. Omi almost kneeling down…poisoned…then without warning the scene reformed… A girl kneeling…something… Darkness, blood, screaming...iron bars...then a death...too little, too late...a gaping blankness of loss...terrible guilt at the blood, drowning in blood... Aya woke up drenched in sweat and half out of bed. He was panting from the loss of breath from the scream he had nearly uttered. What was that all about? He hadn't had nightmares like that in years since after the loss of his family. He had almost the same dream but he was innocent then, innocent of all but surviving for his family. Dreaming of coming home to a messy house...looking for someone...not finding her...him...them...then fading into so much blood...probably from what I discovered before that bomb exploded in our house... Survivor guilt... This guilt had some similarity to the dreams of his first few weeks as an assassin. The first time he had killed had him dreaming of blood and that terrible guilt. But the nightmares then had a different feel to them... There was definitely an undertone of loss and sorrow to these dreams of blood soaked darkness not guilt, or at least not just guilt. It was strange. He sighed. If only Aya-chan was here to figure it out...Aya-chan... His imouto wasn't around anymore. He felt a twinge at his chest at this and tears in his eyes before he slammed the door down on his emotions. Not even, a silence presence in a hospital bed to bring flowers and confidences to. Fate seemed to want to take her away from me... First, Takatori then Schreient... Schreient had taken her away and they will pay dearly for it when Aya caught up with them--when Weiß caught up with them--Aya was not that much of a fool now that he thought he could deal with them alone. He had tried it before and failed and someone he cared for paid the price. This time...this time I won't fail... We won't fail... He swore it to himself, ignoring his doubts. Vengeance is a great motivator and Schreient had plenty of that. We haven't defeated them before but we will...we have to...or I'll never see Aya-chan again... But for now, he had to deal with this… If only Aya-chan--maybe I should take this to Sakura-chan? At the thought, the room doubled somehow and faded into another time and place. Darkness, sorrow and loss... No! Then he was back, back into his room in the Koneko no Sumo Ie. Back? I was never away... If I let these nightmares get in the way, I might get distracted at a crucial moment...and fail...and, finally, fail Aya-chan. Aya decided to concentrate on the thing he could do something about. He really shouldn't even think of such things or of involving others with them especially Sakura. No, I can involve her...that would endanger her beyond prudence...though it is tempting... Sakura's involvement always brought with it the prescience of danger. He didn't really need to be a precog like Crawford to know that he shouldn't even associate with her anymore. Now we come to back to Crawford…maybe he could put a rest to the dreams or know what they mean…after all he is versed in the stranger side of life… Bah! Now you're being illogical, he's your enemy… He refused to think about it anymore that night, but in a way, he couldn't help it. Always in a small corner in his mind, the darkness waited. He didn't know why. *** Aya took out the hose and prepared to water the potted plants outside on the sidewalk. It was another lovely Saturday morning. The skies were a bottomless blue of a thrust's egg and the sun's rays were lightly warming the ground. The high school girls were going about in sundresses. A few of them waved to their favorite bishounen in the shop. Some of the bolder ones had entered the shop to coo over the flowers and talk to Youji who was minding the counter. They chattered gaily and Aya would catch a phrase or two. "Sayuri's sister had these on her prom night…" "She's really lucky. Do you want to…" "Would you want to try asking Aya-san…" "Really…?" Aya ignored them. He had known from past experience that most of the girls just cooed to get the Koneko's handsome flower boys to notice them. I reserve my attention to paying customers, thank you… However, something in the general furor caught his attention. "Won't you go with us to the park, Youji-san. We're going to have a picnic today." Aya glared at the blond piercingly. If he thinks he's going to ditch the shop and me for a day of womanizing, he's got another thing coming… I still haven't forgotten his little Schrieint girlfriend that got us into so much trouble over that mission… She was the reason why we fell into that trap without really even seeing Aya-chan… "Sorry ladies, but I need to mind the shop. See you later." Youji said. I wish that Aya-chan were here… Aya frowned at the thought. It was a familiar one on days like these when the weather was nice and the fan girls were particularly chatty. Their airy cheerfulness was a painful reminder of the times he and his family had spent together in the park. He could almost see them, his dour father sitting solemnly with their smiling mother and Aya-chan friskily running around the park. Aya-chan would tease him to run after her and they would wrestle a bit when he'd caught her. The horseplay would go on until their father would give them a stern look to come to the table and eat. Then they would walk together in the park, reminiscing other times and talking of things until it was late. He missed those days terribly. And all I have now of those days is Aya-chan... He really had to get his sister back there was no other way, but for the present... Aya looked at Youji pointedly. "Sorry, girls, but I can't leave Aya alone to mind the shop. What would he do without me?" Youji asked, giving the girls a flirtatious wink. "Aya-san can come, too." A girl said, she didn't quite dare give the grouch of the shop a look but Aya knew he was being asked. Aya didn't answer. If she isn't polite enough to address it to me, why should I? Before the silence can lengthen too uncomfortably, a brown haired girl in braids came into view. She wore a blue sundress only a shade or two lighter than the sky. She skipped along while she swung a picnic basket. The girl came to a stop in front of Aya. Ah, Sakura-chan... Aya's face softened as he looked on the cheerful girl. Her eyes were a guileless midnight blue, exactly like Aya-chan's. They had a sort of understanding. He didn't know quite what it was yet but he had been comfortable with her since he had met her. He'd grown rather fond of the girl, he might have rescued her for her rescued her for her resemblance to Aya-chan but it had gone much farther than that... *** The victim of the organ thieves...[3] The reporters had swarmed over the girl not giving her any space to maneuver, shouting questions all the while. Even if Aya hadn't seen the Tomoe Sakura's picture, he would've known that she was the one. What a bunch of vultures! If Aya-chan was in the same situation, getting waylaid for her organ by criminals then nearly left to die... She had a lot of courage calling to the radio station, why do they have to treat her like some freak sideshow... The thought of his sister being in the same circumstances angered Aya. He turned the wheel of the Porsche and with a screech of tires scattered the reporters left and right. "Get in!" Aya said. The girl had hesitated a moment before taking his offer, allowing the reporters to shout questions at Aya. "Who are you...?" "What do you think of...?" Smart girl... I would also be cautious if I had been in her situation... "Hurry and get in." Aya added, encouragingly. He wouldn't blame her if she ran away instead but he wanted her to know that the offer was genuine. Except for the short brown hair, She looks even more like Aya-chan than I thought... The uneasy silence grew between them. Aya remembered a cheerful girl in black braids who tagged along her big brother. He remembered that night at the fair with the edged recollection. *** "Aya-chan, we're suppose to come home by now. Father and Mother must be worried...we did say we weren't going to take long." "But Ran-niichan, I'm still looking at these earrings. Aren't they pretty?" Aya-chan asked, pointing at a pair of earrings in the shape of long teardrops. Aya sighed. "I'll buy them for you if you'd hurry up." "Really?" "Really." "Oh, Ran-niichan..." Aya-chan said, glomping onto Aya. He regretted the hasty promise when he heard the price of the two gold teardrops but he paid it anyway. His sister's smile was worth it. Aya-chan WERE quite proud of the earrings, playing with them as they walked home. The house was strangely silent when they came in. A coppery smell permeated the air. Hopefully, father and mother haven't gone to bed waiting for us or there will be hell to pay... Aya felt it immediately the tingle of danger and wrongness but brushed it aside in his anxiety. It was how he had been caught unprepared by what came next. He flipped the light switch to a scene straight from a nightmare. His mother lay on the couch in a pool of her own blood. His father on the floor with his throat cut. The whole living room was painted with blood. Damned, it's going to take hell to clean it out of the upholstery... The incongruous thought came to Aya before reality hit. Mother...Father...they're...they're...dead...ticking, I don't remember having such loud clock here in the living room... "AYA-CHAN!" Aya barely had the wits to push his sister away before the house erupted into flames around them. *** Ironic in extreme that the debris should have fallen outward sparing me...but not... "Please let me off." Sakura requested, interrupting the dark memories that had threatened to swallow Aya. "It's okay. I'm not here to kidnap you." Aya said, not looking at the girl. He didn't want to be drawn in again in the outpouring of memories that tugged at him. And how reassuring is it...remember she's just been kidnapped and...used... Aya reminded himself that it was hardly comforting to be in car with a mysterious stranger, regardless that the said stranger just rescued you from the reporters. He looked at Sakura. Darn... Sheer coincidence had Sakura looking back at that instant. She really looks like Aya-chan. I... Aya could almost see his sister sitting in his Porsche's front seat with him. He could almost see asking an everyday question. Ask him about his work and his friends... Aya-chan stared back at him. No, it's not possible. It's Sakura Tomoe...but I... A honk from behind broke his thoughts. It made him realize that he had been staring. What am I thinking? She isn't Aya-chan. Think fool...you are going to cause an accident if you keep doing this... He closed his eyes for a moment, shook his head to clear it and got his eyes back to the road where they belonged. " You're not with the TV stations are you?" Sakura asked. "No, my name is Aya and I work in a flower shop." Aya said. He concentrated on steering through the morning traffic and. "Aya? Flower shop?" Sakura asked, surprised. From the corner of his eye, Aya saw the girl leaning forward to close her eyes and take a sniff at him. It startled him more than a little that the girl could still be as trusting as that after what happened to her. Does she realize that I could have taken advantage of the situation...? I could have taken that moment to take a turn somewhere and she wouldn't know where we could have ended up… "Yes, you do smell like flowers." Sakura smiled as she leaned back. She giggled and continued. "It's rather funny that a girl named Sakura would be rescued by a person who works in a flower shop." [4] Aya realized his mouth was still a bit open from the surprise and closed it. He turned his head a little to look at the girl, fascinated by the giggle. She really is very like Aya… For second time that day, he saw Aya-chan sitting and giggling at him from the Porsche's seat. He let her off with his commitment to end the lives of the organ thieves becoming a personal thing. If Aya-chan were awake now she could've ended up as one of their victims… *** He'd thought then that he liked Sakura because of that resemblance to his sister. She is uncannily like Aya-chan… He thought it for the nth time but it didn't stop there though. Though it would've been less complicated now if it did… It wasn't the last he'd had seen Sakura in that mission. He had caught her sitting on the grass by the river while he'd been driving on the highway. *** Aya had been restless all day in the flower shop. Omi hadn't found a trace of the truck the organ thieves had been using. Sitting through the noise of the fan girls and routine of the shop had been unbearable when he knew that somewhere out there the Dark Beasts were hunting innocents. One innocent in particular… He had come around the bend when he saw the brown haired figure sitting on the grass. Thinking of the devil…[5] He got out and gone to her. He bent his knees a bit leaning on the hill as they sat there awhile in wordless companionship. He missed that. Aya-chan was the only person that used to be able to provide such comfortable company. His teammates did too now… But it's not quite the same… His fists and jaw clenched a bit at the thought. "Ah, I'm so tired." Sakura whined adorably. She plopped down on the grass. [6] "I've never been this tired before." Sakura said. "Relax, you just had an operation therefore, it's only natural you'll be tired." Aya said, bending a little to put his arms over his knees and turned his head to look down on her at a more comfortable angle. "How did you know that?" Sakura said raising herself on her elbows to put her face closer to Aya's. Aya turned his head but continued to look at her at the edge of his vision. "Oh, right. You heard the radio show right? I did it in anger back then, but I never thought I'd be hounded by the media so much." Sakura said as she draws her knees to her chest imitating Aya's position and puts her arms around her thighs tightly. He just sat there lost again in the memories. If Aya-chan would be half as brave as that… "I feel as I did something bad." "You did nothing bad." Aya said, stoically, trying to control the upsurge of emotion. The world is such a strange place where victims are persecuted along with the criminals... Aya was acutely aware of Sakura's situation because he'd found himself in the same situation when his parents had died. Whispers of embezzlement and other illegal goings on in his father's company seemed to follow him around. The explosion had been the talk of the town for a month. Aya had been angry and full of fight, then. He wanted nothing more than anything to defend his parents, to tell the world that they had done nothing wrong, but that would've raised awkward questions. The Fujimiya son died in the explosion. The protection Kritiker had offered came with that price tag. He couldn't have afforded to lose that with his temper, not for Aya-chan's sake. And what would it prove…nothing… Society wouldn't care and wouldn't change its made-up mind. "The bad ones are those who stole your kidney. Without conscience, they would injure others to sate their own avarice. We cannot leave such people indulging in themselves for long." Aya continued. He looked off in a distance as he tried to keep his deep anger from showing. It would prove nothing then and it wouldn't prove anything now… It would probably scare her too… "Aya-san, who are you?" Sakura said, looking at him wonderingly. Oh great, now she's suspicious… "Like I said, I work at a flower shop." Aya said, roughly. Come on Ran get ahold of yourself…if she could feel it then… He knew his control was slipping if the relatively unobservant, naïve girl could see through his impassive façade. Sakura looked quite surprised at the rebuke, her mouth falling wide open. Oh shit! I can't…leave it at that…at this rate… She broke through Aya's panicked thoughts by giggling. Aya looked at her and saw that she was smiling. "Aya-san, is a good person, ne?" Sakura said, letting the subject lie unanswered for the time being. To his surprise, she stood up put a hand down on the fastening of her skirt. She let the piece of clothing fall down on her legs like a caress of a lover, revealing her legs. What does she think she's doing? The unconsciously sensual motion suddenly made Aya draw in his breath. A strange feeling came over him. It's as if I've seen this before somehow…somehow I've seen her do something like this before… Oddly, it made him all the more aware of Sakura. *** That's it that feeling of familiarity…it's similar… Aya looked back at that first time he had been attracted to Sakura and realized that it was the same with Crawford, the selfsame feeling that they had done this sometime before. What could cause that? And how could it Crawford and Sakura are very different from one another… Aya remembered Crawford's furtive touches to Sakura's innocent caresses and almost blushed at the thought. Crawford wanted him but definitely had more control than Sakura when it came to expressing it. The Schwartz leader knew what they could and couldn't have unlike the high school girl who was quite open about not minding about the danger it brought her. Maybe it is that that makes me less apprehensive about being…um…attached to him… Aya always felt a sense of foreboding when he thought of pursuing the attraction he had felt for Sakura. Not that she had any qualms in the matter… Aya almost smiled fondly, his mind returning to that day. *** "Shall we run a bit?" She crossed her arms and grasped at her shirt ends. "Uh…" She took the answer as an affirmative and raised her arms taking her shirt off. She wore a tight t-shirt underneath her uniform. It hugged her curves, showing a svelte and small-breasted figure, lithe but definitely not a boy. She was wearing tiny cycling shorts and they rode high upon her thighs. He felt a sudden flutter just below his belly. She doesn't look bad…downright pretty…in fact… Coming on the wake of her near-perception and acceptance of what he was; it took sometime for his brain to register what was happening. She seems to do that a lot to me…and I'm…I'm attracted to her… How? The shocking realization shattered the eerie feeling of déjà vu. Aya had admitted to himself sometime ago that he was completely homosexual. Beautiful women never elicited much of a response from him. Hell! Manx and Birman are some the loveliest, from the way Youji rave about them… and I don't even feel a bit for them… [7] The Kritiker agents were certainly man-bait in their clothes. Aya often wondered if it was company policy for female agents to wear such skimpy outfits. Their skirts are practically trying to reach heaven and their necklines, plunging to hell… "Did you know that I'm a famous sprinter? Therefore, I always dress like this so I can practice anywhere and anytime I feel like it. Is it funny?" Sakura asked brightly. She seemed nonplused by Aya's thoughtful silence. Aya just stared at her, still half-lost in his personal revelation. Hmmm…maybe I should…to keep her safe at least… Aya knew he was just making excuses so that he could be close to the high school girl. What are you doing? She's way too young for you, not even legal… You're worse than Youji… Nevertheless, he stood up while Sakura crouched down in the timeless position of track runners and they were off. Sakura went off with a head start but Aya was gaining on her with his longer legs and taller frame. Suddenly, Sakura began to falter. She's pushing herself…so soon after… Aya increased the length of his stride to catch up with Sakura. "Are you all right?" He asked, surprising himself with the degree of concern. He stooped to see if she was truly all right. I've known this girl for how long? I'm must be nuts… But it feels longer… She didn't seem hurt, only winded. She must have just collapsed from the strain… I knew she shouldn't have pushed herself… "I can run anymore." Sakura cried as she tried to stand up. Aya could say nothing else so he offered a hand up. Sakura took the offered hand and stood up. She didn't let it go even when she finally got her feet under her. Aya was dismayed to see that her eyes sparkled with the same mindless infatuation that the fan girls sported when they stared at him. She looks so like Aya-chan that it is practically incest… He couldn't deny it though that there was a part of him crowed at seeing that she was also attracted to him. It was…disturbing…[8] "You have the ability to laugh, cry, and get angry on your own." Aya said coldly to cover his disquiet. That didn't help. Sakura gaped in shock at what he said. Damned! Maybe I should apologize…I shouldn't be taking my anger at her… He didn't have the chance to though since Sakura flung herself at him and wrapped her arms around him. Then she started to sob softly on him. Aya was too shocked then to do anything but stand there. I don't dare comfort her… This cannot become a habit… He still had Aya-chan to think about. He couldn't become attached in any way with victims. He really couldn't afford to. Not that he had any luck being detached, he thought distractedly as he tried to put out of his mind the slight body that was so close to him at the moment. He was still visiting the little girl from that Human Chess mission, the one whose brother had died trying to provide medical care for her blindness. He had also been the one to ask Kritiker to place her in a good orphanage. She also reminded him of Aya-chan, he and the brother had that situation in common at least. However, Sakura was another matter all together… Your perverted attraction to her rather complicates things… *** Try as he might, Aya couldn't seem to shake the attraction and it had existing attraction had just solidified by their next meetings. After that, she had gone to the Koneko that afternoon, chased in by several reporters. Then it was that mission, he'd wished that he hadn't allowed the kidnapping but they had to. Weiß needed a way to track the bastards before another victim could be selected. Aya had gone against orders and tried a rescue mission before the rest of Weiß had gotten there. He couldn't have left Sakura there longer than he could've abandoned Aya-chan. Not when there was a chance that she could've gotten more hurt than she had already. The plan went off without a hitch except for one or two uncomfortable moments during that rescue when the girl's unclad body pressed on his own. It caused him no end of worry afterwards. For someone to touch him so and let him risk himself more than anything else when he needed to live for Aya-chan… She may look like Aya-chan but she isn't. I must concern to keeping myself alive so that I can keep my sister alive until she awakens… and I know she will… It made him doubt the one foundation of his assassin's life and that made him profoundly uncomfortable. Things had gotten even more complicated, then. Kritiker didn't take into account that the Dark Beast they were hunting for would turn on them. Powerful as Takatori had grown, they would have a hard time evading the man's killers. He wondered what to do with Aya-chan. He had a tidy sum squirreled away for her care separate from Kritiker but he couldn't possibly leave her without someone to care for her. Then he found himself approaching the one person he had trusted outside of his team to keep her safe. He found out how deep his trust in the girl and his affection for her ran. He never even thought to contact her to ask her about her sister in those months of running. Only when he was sure that everything was clear that he did so. I never felt the urge to protect someone as strong as that… *** "Aya-san, wouldn't you go picnicking with me after your shift?" Sakura asked breaking through Aya's reminisce of the past. Aya took time to close the hose before replying. It would do no good to splash the girl even accidentally. However, under the stoic façade, he fought his reluctance and sense of wrong-ness. "Aa." He finally said. Some meters across the street, a car revved up its engine, unnoticed. A passerby noticed an angry jerky flash of eyeglasses visible through the window before the car took off with a roar similar to an outraged wild cat. ~TBC~ Author's Notes: Again, guesses on who incarnated as who will be appreciated. I need to know if I'm writing right. *mischevous twitch of wolfy ears* Should I write Sakura-chan's view point next? *ducks the barrage of rotten tomatoes* [1] Cirrhosis - is a disease especially of the liver, characterized by hardening of the tissues (from the New American Webster Handy College Dictionary). One of the causes of the condition is excessive alcohol consumption. Ayan-kitsune: *pipes up while thumping
his tails* Silrayn keeps a dictionary by the computer handy.
[2] What a mouthful! I love making these poetic images. I'm trying, again, to write them in. I just have a tendency to overdo poetic images, I've still haven't found the proper amount to sprinkle on my story. One of the workshop panelists in my Creative Writing class said that I should quit writing fiction and stick to poetry for my fiction submission. Since then, I've been trying to modulate my imagery. If I edit my own work, I'm quite capable of stuffing every sentence with description and metaphor until they look like pigs for the market. The "every sentence" is not an exaggeration. I have one original story that has a character running for her life who's acting like she was giving a guided tour. - I hope the Youji-Asuka interaction
is okay. I've never even been in a romantic relationship before so I wouldn't
know how that is.
[3] Canon, many thanks again for Rei Eien! Most of the Fraulien episode conversations and events are true to canon. *silrayn ducks a hail of rotten tomatoes from CxA fans* Very sorry but it's necessary to write her in but here's an omake I thought of while chatting with Rei. Brad-kitsune: *burning pictures, letters and small knickknacks * A few moments later…
[4] Sakura
- cherry blossom (utterly and nauseous sweet)
[5] Yeah, Devil… Brad-kitsune: *stands in front of
Ayan-kitsune facing Sakura, he wears a large crucifix around his neck and
snarls* Begone you evil spirit! Fan-girls are classified up there with
the greater demons.
[6] Ayan-kitsune: Ugh! The saccharine
is enough to make me barf!
[7] Hel: Did you call me?
[8] You, talking to me? I found it even more disturbing writing this part. Bah! My mind is a strange thing, coming out with plots that disturb its own peace. Finally, the Sakura intensive chapter is finished. It made my hair stand up on end, it did. Incest makes me tetchy. Ayan-kitsune: Ahh, thank the gods.
Here, hold her for me! I can't bear her company one moment more. *Throws
the limp Sakura to Silrayn and runs off to snuggle with his Brad-kitsune*
~@~ Thanks! Thanks for the reviews I've been getting. I really appreciate them. Here's the reaction and Q&A portion: - Aya is Hakkai and Crawford is Sanzo, no doubt about it. Shuo Ri: Sorry but I think the table wouldn't be forthcoming just yet. I want to try it the other way first. Briar Rose: Thanks, for the long well thought out review…see A/N for my other reactions. *wolfy glompies* Crawford-Aya fans out there: I will certainly try to make more of that stuff. I write mostly CxA and this story is just another excuse to get my two favorite bishies together. (Though some canon stuff got sneaked into this story… ^^;;;) Ayan-kitsune: don't you get tired
of torturing us?
Babaca: Wai! I'm glad someone picked up on the joke. Seeing Huang devoted to Nii is such a funny image to me. *Wolfy glompies you* ~ Here endeth the longest chapter and possibly the longest Author's Notes I've ever made in my fanficing life. I hope all the omakes have washed the Sakura-taste out of the mouth of Sakura-haters out there. ~ |
Echoes in the Soul
By: silrayn silverwolf
[Saiyuki Crossover][retitled] An ancient evil is about to rise again, but those warriors who must fight it must first deal with certain issues. Here there be dragons... CrawfordxAya, YoujixAsuka and...and see inside...
Rated: Fiction T - English - Supernatural/Romance - B. Crawford, Aya/Ran F. - Chapters: 4 - Words: 18,817 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 4 - Updated: Feb 24, 2003 - Published: Nov 10, 2002 - id: 1059625
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Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten
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