I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance,
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Living might mean taking chances but they're worth taking,
Loving might be a mistake but it's worth making,
Don't let some hell bent heart leave you bitter,
When you come close to selling out reconsider,
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance.
~"I Hope You Dance," Lee Ann Womack
Minerva made her way up to the top of the Canyon, where she knew she would find Sephiroth. He was always there, it seemed. She wondered what he was thinking about as she approached him. Aeris? Jenova? She hoped he was not fighting with Jenova again, because she was not certain whether he would win.
"Sephiroth?" she asked hesitantly.
He glanced at her briefly, then turned his attention back to the village below.
She moved closer and sat down beside him, a slight frown on her face, wondering if he was the one to ask. Of course, who else did she have? "What is a kiss?"
He started, glancing at her again. "...why do you ask?" he queried guardedly.
"Reno mentioned it while we were talking," she replied, watching him uncertainly, "but I did not bother to ask him then... It did not seem important at the time."
Sephiroth nodded and seemed to relax somewhat, frowning for a moment. "A kiss is... when you touch your lips to someone else's, or perhaps their cheek or hand..."
"Oh..." Was that what he...? "Is it a sign of affection? Like a hug?"
He nodded again, shifting uncomfortably. "More or less."
Minerva leaned back on her hands, thoughtfully. "It is stronger though, is it not?"
"Yes..."
She watched him from behind. "...Aeris cares for you, too, you know."
Turning to meet her gaze, he sighed miserably. "Not... like that. She cannot... How could anyone care about me that much, abomination that I am?"
She shook her head. "You are not an abomination. The you that killed hundreds and attempted ascent to godhood-that is not the you that is here now. Perhaps it is still within you, and you have not killed it yet, but you have control over it."
He turned away. "...even you agree with Aeris."
"Because she is right." Minerva sat up and followed his gaze to the village below, where the afternoon sun was highlighting the warm tones of the people and the shops. "...if you are avoiding her because you kissed her, you should not. She did not seem to mind; she only seemed worried about you. She knew you would blame yourself for doing something 'wrong.'"
"I should not have made my feelings clear," he insisted. "She is already involved in a love triangle, and she does not need me to complicate things further."
"What love triangle?" she asked.
"She loves Cloud, and he cares for her as well, but he married Tifa after she died."
"Then what should you worry for? I should think that you would solve that problem, rather than complicate it."
Sephiroth glanced at her with a raised eyebrow. "What do you mean?"
"If Cloud has Tifa, then Aeris can now turn to you, yes?"
He shook his head. "She will not, and no one would ever approve of it."
"How do you know she will not? And why should the opinions of others matter so much?"
"Did no one tell you what I did to her? I was the one who killed her to begin with, Minerva. How could anyone who knows this stand to see her with me? They fear for her safety every time she is out of their sight. Fear that I may murder her again. And so do I. Gods, I don't want her to die again..."
"I know you killed her," Minerva said quietly, eyes lowered. "Jenova let me see that memory of yours... No, she forced me to watch it, through your eyes. I do not know what you were thinking then, but I know what you did. And I know you waited until she had succeeded in summoning Holy to strike."
He stared at her. "You know... you saw... and yet, you still believe that... that we should be together?"
Minerva looked up and met his gaze. "Yes. You are not the same as you were then. And even if you 'snapped' once again, I would not worry. You were nearly gone in the lab, I know, and it was Aeris who brought you back to sanity again. It is her absence, no doubt, as well as Jenova's voice, that brought you to that. So logic would dictate that it is safer for you to be close to her, rather than far from her."
He was silent for a long moment, looking back at her, studying her, before he finally turned away. "...you know a great deal more than anyone thinks you do."
"Indeed," she replied. "I keep it to myself. Most of it no one should ever know, so the knowledge will die with me, should I ever die."
"If Jenova can be killed, then there is death for us as well, isn't there?"
She nodded. "But how does one kill Jenova?"
You cannot. You are both fools to think that you can. My offer still stands, my daughter.
And what offer might that be? I am free now. You've nothing to give to me.
Sephiroth glanced at her. "The Planet said that one with the powers of both the Cetra, and of Jenova, could defeat her."
Oh, that's a likely thing, Jenova scoffed.
"Certainly no one exists like that. What do you plan to do? Aeris is the only Cetra..."
Strange, Minerva thought, how Hojo's experiment, had he ever gotten the chance to go through with it, would have produced a being capable of destroying you.
Do you wish he had completed it?
Sephiroth shifted uncomfortably. "Aeris thinks differently..."
No, she replied simply, tilting her head in question to Sephiroth. "And what does she say?"
"She is convinced that I am part Cetra, and certainly it is logical, but..."
Ha! Sephiroth, a Cetra? What a foolish notion.
She raised her eyebrows in surprise, ignoring Jenova. "You? Well... I suppose it is possible. And Aeris would be the one to know."
"But, I am..."
"What you are does not necessarily dictate who you are."
Aren't we being comforting today?
Oh, shut up.
Sephiroth nodded slightly, and there was a long silence between them, while the two sat and looked down at the village. The people were moving about, setting up the last few tables and chairs, making last minute decisions on what would be said and done, and running such odd errands as were needed. "...Minerva?" he asked finally.
"Yes?"
"What happens if... if she does return my feelings?"
"You are asking the wrong person. I do not know such things."
He sighed. "I suppose not. But I cannot speak of them to anyone else..."
"Have you no other friends here, besides Aeris?" she asked with some surprise. Even if he was hated and feared... He seemed kind enough to her.
Frowning slightly, he shook his head, though not in reply. "There is one who calls me her friend, and she has done things for my sake, but... she is too naïve for such talk. I suppose..." he admitted, "that I could talk to my mother. But even her I have only just met, and I am not certain what to make of her..."
"I did not know your mother was here..."
He nodded, eyes downcast. "...she had died, but Aeris revived her, for Vincent's sake."
Minerva studied him carefully. "It seems there is a long story behind this."
"Yes," he replied. "But I am not the one to tell it."
She got to her feet, still looking down at him. "I should like to meet your mother... What does she look like?"
"Short, with brown hair and eyes like ours," he answered curtly.
Nodding, she glanced around. "...their celebration is tonight, you know. Do you plan on attending?"
He hesitated. "...yes, I suppose. I shall watch in any case. But I do not intend to enjoy myself."
"I did not think you would," she replied, turning to go. He did not respond to her words, nor her departure, and she did not expect him to.
She made her way back down, keeping an eye out for Sephiroth's mother. She believed she had seen the woman. Yes, she had been there to greet them when they arrived. Her name was Lucrecia, she thought. Yes, she had seen it mentioned once or twice in Hojo's files. She saw Reno with Elena and that tall bald man-Rude?-sitting on one of the rock outcroppings farther down the side of the cliff wall that overlooked the land below. She continued on. She would talk to him later.
Minerva descended the last few steps and looked out toward the line of shops. The people milling about were not shoppers for the most part, but those who had helped to set up the many tables and chairs there, or were still helping with a number of odd tasks. There was a small group of people with instruments that she could not name who were playing music, apparently practicing. She stood poised on the last step for a long moment, listening to them, before she went on.
Walking along the line of shops, she finally turned her attention upward, to where a few more shops were braced against the canyon wall, connected by a wooden walk with a railing. Lucrecia was leaning against the rail, Vincent beside her, no longer wearing the red cape he had had on before.
She strode over to the ladder leading up to that particular string of buildings and climbed it swiftly. She was used to ladders and suspended platforms. Those here reminded her of the reactor's maze of them, although here the colors held the warmth of reds and browns and oranges rather than the cold of grey and black. And they were not nearly so lonely.
Upon reaching the top, she hesitated. She did not know exactly how one went about asking for a conversation. Indeed, she rarely started them... But while she stood there in uncertainty, Sephiroth's mother turned to glance in her direction, and then smiled and motioned her over. Vincent noticed the movement and looked her way as well.
Blinking a little at the woman's friendliness, she walked over as invited.
"Hello," Lucrecia greeted. "You looked a little lost. Even more so than Sephiroth or Vincent when it comes to people."
The girl nodded. "I am very awkward that way," she admitted.
"What brings you up here?" the woman asked.
"You are Sephiroth's mother, yes? I wanted to talk to you..." She glanced uncertainly at Vincent. "I hope I am not interrupting anything..."
Lucrecia smiled again. "Vincent has just been telling me about all that has happened that I've missed for one reason or another. And I wanted to talk to you, too. You look an awful lot like my son." She, too, glanced at Vincent. "Would you rather not have him listening in?"
She shook her head slowly. "No, let him listen as well. I do not mind. But is there somewhere more... private?"
"Yes; I have a room at the inn. Well, I'm not sure whose name it's in exactly, but I've been using it during the past few days. Is that all right?"
Minerva nodded silently.
Straightening, Lucrecia gestured for the both of them to follow her, and headed back along the walk and down the ladder. With a glance at the mute Vincent, the girl followed her. Sephiroth's mother led them into the inn and down the hall, opening one of the doors on the side and entering. Minerva followed, and Vincent closed the door behind them.
Lucrecia sat down on one of the beds, inviting the other two to sit down as well. Vincent took his place beside her, while Minerva chose to sit opposite them.
"Seeing as you sought me out first, and that you do seem a bit uncomfortable, I'll answer your questions first, all right?" Lucrecia offered.
She nodded. "Actually... I had wanted a story from you. Sephiroth mentioned the two of you, and it reminded me of the many questions I had about you... You see, I have read many of Hojo's files, but they detail experimental results, not events..."
The woman nodded. "I understand. There is a very long story, but I'll tell it to you. The both of us will tell you..." she ammended, glancing at Vincent. "The question is, where to start it..." She sat tapping her finger to her lip for a moment before she looked up with a smile.
"Well... I suppose it's best to tell you exactly who I am, isn't it? You know my name I hope-Lucrecia-but that's not knowing a person... I grew up in the Midgar slums, though back then they weren't quite so poor as they became in later years. I was interested in everything, always wanting to know how things worked and where they came from, so I made up my mind to become a scientist."
She shook her head slightly. "Of course, no one thought I'd ever do it. I was a woman, for one thing, and for another, I was a woman of the slums. But I worked hard at it, and despite Shinra rejecting me several times for those very reasons, I was persistant enough that they finally gave in. I kept up my work, and eventually they overlooked my gender and agreed reluctantly that I was pretty good. The day I got promoted to being assistant to Professor Gast was the day I met Vincent... He had been promoted as well-to the Turks.
"A lot of things happened between then and the time the Jenova Project began, but I need not go into detail. Vincent and I grew close, but then... Hojo was also a good friend of mine. He was much more human back then... but he had a temper, and he was fiercely possessive." She sighed and shook her head.
"Three scientists, myself included, went to Nibelheim for the Jenova Project, and Shinra sent a Turk with us, Vincent. Professor Gast was the project leader, a gentle, forgetful man. Hojo and I were his assistants."
"Gast was to go down in the history books as the greatest scientist ever. Hojo would spend his entire life trying to be better than him and only being remembered as a madman by a few dozen people. And me? I was all but forgotten. I don't even know what Shinra told the few friends that I had, or my family..."
"Is there anyone alive now who would know?" Minerva interrupted, curious.
"The Turks kept records of nearly everything," Vincent answered. "So if any of them had bothered to read them... Perhaps Reeve or Reno."
The girl nodded slightly. "I could ask one of them..."
"Could you...?" Lucrecia asked. "I am very curious."
Minerva nodded. "As am I. But I would not want to ask him without having him hear the rest of your story at least, if you do not mind."
She hesitated. "Well... if he's your friend, I suppose it's all right." She glanced at Vincent. "Do you agree?"
"I know Reno," he replied. "He may joke around, but any Turk has to be able to keep his mouth shut."
Friend... Minerva thought, standing. Yes, I suppose I could call him that... "I will go find him then. I should not be too long."
She exited the room quietly and headed back to where she had seen Reno before with his friends. Well, she guessed they were his friends, but she did not know. They were still there, talking, and this time she did not walk past them, but moved to stand just inside the archway, hesitating again.
Elena noticed her first and poked Reno in the side.
"Hey!" he cried, poking her back.
She frowned at him and twisted to look back at Minerva. "Your girlfriend's here," she said. "I just thought you outta know."
"She's not my girlfriend," he muttered, sounding as though he had argued this point before, and turned to look back at her. "Hey, Min. What's up?"
She faltered. "I wanted to speak with you, if you do not mind the interruption."
"Oh, sure," he replied, hopping to his feet. "We weren't talking about anything real important."
Minerva nodded a bit, and glanced briefly at his friends, who were watching, Elena with a smirk, the other expressionless.
"See you guys later," Reno said to them.
"Bye," Elena responded.
The redhead grinned at Minerva and started past her and inside. She followed him. Once they were out of hearing range of the other two, he stopped, shoving his hands in his pockets. "So, did you have something on your mind? It doesn't seem like you to just wanna talk."
"I was curious about Lucrecia and Vincent, so I went to talk to them, and it seems there is information after their story that you might know. I do not know exactly what it is, for I have not yet heard all they have to say; I thought it would be more logical for you to hear it as well."
"That was thoughtful of you," he remarked. "Sure, I'll listen to 'em, and if I know anything, I'll tell 'em."
She nodded gratefully and turned to lead him back to the inn. She opened the door quietly, ushering him in, then followed and closed it just as softly behind her. She hesitated, wondering if perhaps she should make introductions, but Lucrecia again saved her the trouble.
"You must be Reno," she said, smiling. "I'm Lucrecia. It's nice to meet you."
He grinned. "Nice to meet you, too. People don't usually say that."
She did not reply to that, only shook her head, and gestured to the opposite bed. "Sit down, both of you. This may take a while."
The two sat, Minerva keeping a few feet between herself and Reno. "Min said something about a story," he said.
"Yes," Lucrecia replied. "Having been a Turk and having been part of this last mission against Hojo, you know something about the Jenova Project, yes?"
Reno nodded.
She smiled. "Good. I was afraid I'd have to repeat myself... Some of this the both of you already know, but you will just have to hear it again."
"Go on then," Minerva said.
"Right, well... The four of us reached Nibelheim, and at first we only studied the Jenova creature, observing it, seeing how its cells reacted to certain chemicals, things such as that. Eventually Gast decided that it was an Ancient. There was talk of experimenting on humans, to see if Jenova's cells would enhance their abilities. I was most interested in whether it would increase their ability to heal, and the others absently agreed with it. I don't know what was foremost on Gast's mind. Hojo only wanted to create something powerful..."
She sighed and frowned before continuing. "We tested on animals first, monitoring their reactions, and waited to hear from President Shinra. I had grown much closer to both Hojo and Vincent. Hojo understood my dreams and my carreer, and he talked as much as he listened. He was moody, true, but we shared so many things... Vincent, on the other hand, was much gentler than he, more willing than Hojo to spend time away from work to talk about anything, though he was a Turk and kept much to himself..." She glanced at him, smiling faintly, almost apologetically.
Vincent shook his head slightly. "There is nothing to apologize for. I was quiet, and I did not understand all that you said, as Hojo did..."
Minerva said nothing, as did Reno, and the two waited for Lucrecia to go on.
"So it was around that time that he proposed to me. I... I did not know what to say, so I ran to Hojo." She lowered her head, lashes hiding her eyes. "It was a much harsher blow to Vincent than I ever should have wished... But he did not show it, of course. He stayed away from me, as though that was what I wanted. Maybe it was, for how could I face him again after that? Everything seemed unreal... So when Hojo asked the same of me, I accepted. I married him instead, became his wife, though I think he could tell something was bothering me.
"Only a few weeks after the wedding, we got word from President Shinra that it was alright to go ahead with the project as soon as we found a willing 'guinea pig.' Hojo persuaded me that he and I could contribute to the experiment." Her head sank lower. Beside her, Vincent frowned slightly and put an arm around her. She glanced up at him, smiling gratefully, then went on.
"So I gave my unborn child up to the Jenova Project. There were so many tests during the following months, and I saw next to nothing of Vincent. When I did see him, he was cold and formal. Hojo grew more and more obsessed with the Project, and harsher towards me. Only Professor Gast remained the same, though he did not notice what was going on for a long time. And by then it was too late for him to do much of anything. He let me rest during the last month in an attempt to ensure my health, but I no longer cared.
"Finally the child was born, a boy, my son. They asked me for a name, but they did not let me hold him. I lasted only a week or two longer, wasting away. Vincent came to see me near the end. He said he would bring help, and bring Sephiroth, so I could hold him... but he never came back, and I was alone until the end..."
Vincent lowered his gaze at this, and added his piece in a soft voice. "I went to the basement, and found only Hojo there, running some test on Sephiroth. I was desperate, so asked him for help. For a moment, I thought he cared... But then he shot me, and altered me, and locked me in that coffin." He shook his head. "After a time, I did figure out how to escape from it, but sleep always came to claim me before long. It was not until a full thirty years had passed and Cloud found me there that I was able to remain awake."
The silence stretched after his words until Lucrecia finally looked up, smiling sadly and looking to Reno. "So, you see, we wanted to know what everyone was told; there were people who knew us who would have desired an explanation. Something to quell their curiosity."
"You're lucky you're pretty or I wouldn't've paid so much attention to your file," Reno said, grinning just a little. "It was probably an easy cover-up job. Your friends and family were told that you died giving birth to your son, and I think they had a funeral for you. I dunno if Hojo went. As for Vincent," he went on, nodding to him, "they didn't mention you. No family or friends to speak of outside the Turks, and they were allowed to know what actually happened to you."
"Didn't the company get angry at Hojo for depriving them of one of their Turks?" Lucrecia asked.
Reno shook his head. "He told them that Vincent was getting in the way of the project, out of hand and all, and they accepted that. Maybe he got a reprimand, but nothing else."
"What about Professor Gast?" Minerva queried.
"He was against the whole thing. He stuck with the Jenova Project for a few years, then quit it and moved on to something else. More research on the Ancients or something."
"Did he try to do anything for my son?" Lucrecia questioned eagerly.
The redhead shook his head. "I don't know... If he did, nobody recorded it, or at least I don't remember it."
She sighed. "Did no one inquire as to who was looking after him?"
"They probably just told them his dad was taking care of him, which I guess was true..."
Disappointed, she looked down at her lap. "I suppose no one really cared, did they?" No one was able to respond to this, so they remained silent until she lifted her head again and spoke. "Well." She took a breath and looked at Minerva. "Where do you come into this?"
The girl shifted slightly. "...I am very much like your son, as you said. Hojo altered his genes slightly to create me. Nothing more."
Lucrecia shook her head. "'Nothing more'? You may be similar, but I'm sure you differ in many ways. I know I would prefer to think of you as siblings." She smiled. "Which makes you my daughter."
She bowed her head. "Thank you..."
"If you don't mind my asking, why did Hojo... create you?"
"To keep Sephiroth under control, should he ever aquire him again."
"Is that all?"
Minerva's gaze shifted aside. "No. But I do not wish to mention the other reasons."
She nodded and smiled reassuringly. "Then we won't ask them of you."
The girl stood. "Thank you. But I believe I have taken up enough of your time."
"No, you can stay..." Lucrecia said.
She shook her head. "No. We can speak another time. My interruption has been long enough already." She turned for the door as Reno stood, awkwardly, and nodded a goodbye to the two.
Lucrecia stood and caught him by the arm. "Wait, please. I nearly forgot; do you know what happened to Vincent's father?"
Vincent looked up sharply at this, though he said nothing. Minerva paused in the doorway.
Reno thought a moment. "There was only one other 'Valentine.' Assassinated because he was a real strong pro-Wutain, and pretty high up. President Shinra saw him as a threat."
Releasing him, she nodded silently.
"...that would make sense," Vincent muttered behind her.
"Sorry," the redhead said, running a hand through his hair in discomfort. "See you later, I guess."
"Goodbye," Lucrecia called after them as they exited, closing the door behind them.
Minerva expected Reno to go back to his friends, but instead he walked along at her side. "So, were you just curious, or was there something else?"
She glanced at him. "I only wanted to see what Sephiroth's mother was like."
"As opposed to yours?"
"Both of us had Talya," she stated. "Only recently did we meet Lucrecia. It does not matter."
"Besides," he added casually, "she did call you her daughter, huh?"
The girl nodded. "Yes... she did..."
"Guess that's cool. You still have a mom that way."
"Nn." She looked at him. "And what was your mother like?"
He shrugged. "She was a slums woman, and I was just another mouth to feed. Not much to it."
"Good mothers seem in short supply," Minerva commented dryly.
Reno grinned. "Did you just make a joke?"
She blinked a little, then shrugged. "I am lacking of a sense of humor."
"Nah, I'll bet you have one. Might be a little weird, but everybody's got a sense of humor." She did not reply, and he sobered. "Hey, Min, can we sit down and talk seriously?"
"Of course," she agreed with a glance at him. The strode past the last few shops and found the few crates where they had sat before and did likewise. "Did you find an answer to my question?" she asked of him.
He started, then nodded, not looking at her. "Yeah..."
She waited, not quite understanding why this should be so hard to say.
"I like you 'cause you take me seriously," he said finally. "I know I joke around a lot. But with anyone else, if I ever try to be serious, they still laugh. But I can be serious with you. Which means I can actually tell you stuff. And you seem to trust me, too, which is weird... but nice." He looked up and grinned at her. "Am I making sense?"
Minerva nodded. "I understand. But, you must know that it is not in my nature to take things lightly."
"I know," he replied. "But a lot of people who are like that don't put up with me. You don't seem to mind."
She scoffed a little, but made no other response.
"I was wondering-did you ever have preferences?" he asked abruptly.
"...perhaps I used to, but I learned to forget them because it was never a matter of want."
Reno frowned. "You didn't get much you wanted in the slums, but you always hoped you'd snag a job with good pay and get out of it..."
"I did not have that hope," she said.
"...about your song-" he began awkwardly.
"It meant nothing," she interrupted curtly, shooting him a look before lowering her gaze to where her hands rested in her lap.
He frowned again and put an arm around her shoulders, and though her muscles tensed in anticipation of a blow, there was something strangely comforting in the contact. "No, it meant something," he said. "And you know that. You were hopeless and lonely and bitter. Did you ever cry from it?"
"No," she clipped, both angry and... she could think of no word for it. It was a feeling that made her want to tell him things. Secrets. But she could not do that, so she kept her mouth shut save for that one word.
"Well," he said, releasing her. "You're stronger than I'll ever be."
"...you tried to defend me," she said softly, keeping her eyes downcast.
Reno snorted. "That, was sheer stupidity."
She shook her head. "Does it not take strength to cast aside logic to defend someone who has fallen, even though you cannot fight their foe any better than they?"
He looked at her for a long moment, but she did not meet his gaze. "Well, you stopped me. So I still owe you."
Minerva looked up. "Owe you?"
"Yeah," he replied. "You know, for helping me get outta my cell, and helping us escape from the reactor."
"No," she argued. "It is I who owe you. I was the one who put you in that cell to begin with, and I who created those obstacles. And you..." Here she hesitated, then forged on. "You helped me to defy the Professor."
"And how did I help you with that?" he asked. "I just had a nightstick, that's all."
She shook her head. "If you had not been there, I may have submitted..."
He ran a hand through his hair. "Could you explain that for me?"
The girl lowered her gaze, embarrassed without knowing why. "I knew if I did submit then, that I would have to hurt you, and that was something I did not want to do because... because you were not afraid to be kind with me, as all those before you were."
"...wow" was all he said.
She glanced at him, questioning.
Reno grinned in embarrassment. "I mean... hell, you make me sound nice."
"You are," she replied.
"And that," he declared triumphantly, "is why I like you." Music started abruptly, as if to punctuate this statement, and Minerva started in spite of herself, glancing towards its source. She could not see beyond the shop wall, but she remembered that being where the musicians were...
"Looks like the party's starting," Reno said, then got up and walked a ways forward, looking westward. "Sun's setting," he commented, glancing back at her. "You wanna watch it, then head over?"
She stood up and followed him, standing just behind him. "...sure," she replied.
He led her to the most eastern part of the village and they sat down with their feet dangling over the edge of the canyon. Though she tried to hide it, though she had seen the sunset a few times before, the sight and the color still amazed her, and she watched in silence without paying any attention to Reno until he spoke.
"Did you figure out how you felt about your mom?" he asked.
She glanced briefly at him, then shook her head. "I... I need to speak to Sephiroth about her. He knows-knew-her much better than I ever did. There... were a few things she did, to try to be nice. But I never appreciated her 'kindness.'"
"Things? Like what?"
"She lied to me, thinking that I would prefer the pretense that I could leave that lab when I wished, to knowing that I could not leave."
"...how long did you believe it?"
"Until I tried to escape when I was six," Minerva replied.
"...hurt like a bitch?"
She nodded.
Reno grimaced for her. "Did she try to do anything else for you?"
"...she left me alone when she thought I wanted to be left alone."
"But you didn't."
"No."
"I'm sorry."
"Do not apologize for things that are not your fault," she told him. He did not reply. She watched the sun sink, red and swollen, behind another rise of the canyon, lit crimson and shadowed black. The sky above was clear and empty, and the sun's color streaked upwards, still trying vainly to light the vastness even as it fell. But this was not its time. Its time was ending, and soon the moon would come shyly to take its place, modest in its pale glory, accompanied by an array of stars...
The sky was darkening, the color seeping away behind the canyon, the glorious light dying out. But the heat of the sun remained, unphased by the departure of its owner. Reno got to his feet. "Ready?" he asked.
She stood, nodding, and turned to follow him towards the party. She tugged the red-brown shirt off as they walked, exposing the short red one beneath it; the heat here was bothering her, and with all the people in one place, it was not likely to get any cooler. Reno blinked at her, and she blinked back at him. "I am hot," she explained.
"Oh," he said. "That lab was freezing, so I guess you would be..." He looked her over. "That shirt looks good on you."
She did not reply. She never knew exactly what to make of his compliments. Aesthetic values were new to her. In the lab, all had been bare necesseties, all had looked the same. Nothing that was not needed, and certainly not decoration or color. It was either needed or it was not.
She had had wants, a few of them, but they had never been addressed by anyone, and she often dismissed them as pointless. Here though, wants were nearly as important as needs. There were things called 'happiness' and 'beauty' which she had never before experienced. Strangely, they confused her as nothing else had before. She knew at least, that the sunset and the sky were beautiful. But that was all she was certain of now.
"Hey, looks like Rude and Elena've already claimed a table. Wanna go join 'em?"
"If you wish," she replied indifferently.
Reno grinned and started towards them, and she followed a few paces behind him, shaking her head at his immaturity. But then, was that really something to scoff at?
Aeris sat on the edge of the bed, running a brush through her hair over and over. She couldn't remember the last time she bothered to comb it through. Her eyes were on the few sheets of paper laying on her nightstand that Vincent had left for her that morning. She had forgotten that she had asked him to tell her about her father, Professor Gast, but he'd remembered. That boat trip from Costa del Sol seemed like ages ago, even though it had only been a week or so...
Her father, leader of the Jenova Project, researcher of the Ancients, inventor of countless machines, world-renowned scientist... She remembered him from Vincent's nightmare as a kind, absent-minded man, certainly much more interested in his work than in people. He and Bugenhagen had been friends; the machines here were his gifts. To think, he wanted so badly to understand the Cetra that he built a machine that could hear the cries of the Planet. But only its cries, and not its words... Yet he had come much closer than any human ever had.
Coming out of her quiet reflection, she ran the brush through her hair one more time, finding no knots as she had for the past few minutes. Shaking her head at herself, she set it down and reached to tie back some of her hair, just to keep it out of her face. She smoothed her dress needlessly and wondered what she was so nervous about.
Was it because he might be there? Would he run from her again if he saw her? No, too many people... It was more likely that he would avoid the whole thing entirely, but she still hoped that he would be there. And for some reason, she wanted to be presentable for him. She stepped out of her room, closing the door behind her and smiling at Cloud, who stood waiting for her. Tifa had gone ahead to the party to stake out a table for them.
Cloud, like many of her friends, had invested in new clothes in the earth tones common in Cosmo Canyon, although they did have other styles as well. He, as well as Tifa, had insisted on buying a few things for her. And that was how she had ended up with this strapless yellow-gold party dress. Though it left little exposed aside from her shoulders and reached midway down her calf, it accounted for a good part of her nervousness.
"You look beautiful," Cloud told her with a shy smile.
She blushed faintly. "Thank you, Cloud. Now, let's hurry and catch up with Tifa before she suspects something of us. I've kept you waiting longer than I intended."
"It's all right," he replied, shaking his head and offering her his hand. "Come on."
Aeris took it with a smile and followed him out of the inn and among the quickly-filling tables to where Tifa was sitting, joined already by Nanaki. The Cetra started to take her seat next to him, but a fresh song was starting and Cloud looked at her imploringly.
"Would you like to dance?"
She straightened, glanced briefly at Tifa, who nodded, then turned back to Cloud and nodded also. "I would love to."
He took her hand again and led her past the last few tables, taking her in his arms. Old, familiar feelings stirred inside her as they danced. Having him so close to her, his deep blue eyes gazing into hers, made her heart flutter. No, no, no...! She couldn't get caught up in this again. Not again. She was almost relieved when the music drew to a close.
She let go of Cloud's hand, smiling. "...you should be dancing with Tifa."
"What about you?"
Her green eyes twinkled mischeiviously. "I'll find someone else to dance with."
"...all right," he answered a little uncertainly. He hesitated before leaving her and walking to Tifa.
With a skip in her step and a flutter of nervous excitement in her stomach, Aeris went to the edge of the firelight where the onlookers waited, watched, talked amongst themselves. There were a few tables where people sat drinking and laughing. She walked past them into the shadows, scanning for Sephiroth. Part of her said to leave him be and ask Reno, but she knew she wanted more from him than just a dance. And he needed more from her than just a smile...
She found him leaning against the wall with his arms folded across his chest, trying to remain unnoticed. His eyes were already on her, and his expression looked mildly anxious. What was he thinking, she wondered? What had he told himself since that night on the airship an eternity ago? But he was not running from her, so she assumed that was a good sign and smiled at him.
"What are you doing hiding back here?" she asked.
"Staying out of the way," he replied. "What are you doing here? I thought you would be dancing, or at least talking to one of your friends."
"I need a partner."
Sephiroth shifted slightly and looked past her. "Reno should be about somewhere."
"Oh, he's busy trying to flirt with Minerva," Aeris laughed.
He scoffed. "Good luck to him."
"Well?"
"Well what?"
"Are you going to dance with me?"
"I don't know how."
She rolled her eyes. "It would take you three seconds to learn. What's your real reason?"
He shifted uncomfortably.
"You think it's ridiculous for someone with your reputation to be dancing at a party," she said, although she knew that was not his only reason. There were many others, of course.
"Yes."
"Well, that's no excuse." Aeris took hold of his arm and tugged a little. "Come on."
"Aeris," he said in alarm, "I can't..."
"Why not? Are you afraid of having fun? Afraid of other people seeing you enjoying yourself?"
"It's ridiculous... I..."
She smiled. "Just one dance. If you don't like it, you can come back to your corner and hide. I won't mind. But try it at least. Please?"
"But Aeris... you... I..."
She paused, studying him carefully, her face serious for a moment. "...if you're still worried about what happened the last time we were together, don't be. You didn't do anything wrong, and it doesn't hurt me. I just..." She shook her head and smiled. "It's all right, okay? It was a sweet gesture."
He bowed his head. "I apologize for running from you... both then, and during these past few days..."
Aeris shook her head. "It's all right. No one ever taught you how to deal with those emotions... so naturally you'd be afraid of them. Now... will you be a gentleman and dance with me?"
Sephiroth sighed. "If you insist. But only once..."
Aeris led him by the arm through the crowd; a few people stared as she passed them. Cloud was standing with Tifa on the edge of the dance floor, as the last song had just ended. She smiled in response to their expressions of astonishment.
The Cetra stopped on the dance floor and faced Sephiroth. She hesitated, then smiled sheepishly as she stepped closer and put his hand around her waist. Being so close to him made her oddly nervous, and a little... giddy, maybe?
And when was the last time you felt like that, Aeris?
Memories of a gondola ride and brightly colored fireworks came to mind, but she quickly shook her head and looked up at Sephiroth. He was not looking at her, but instead had averted his gaze to the crowd. She took his other hand and waited for the music to begin. "...you're supposed to lead, but-"
"I know," he interrupted. "I have been watching."
The band started up again. The pace was moderate; Sephiroth's neutral blue-green eyes watched the other dancers for a time before he began to step tentatively in time with the music.
"I never thought the Great Sephiroth would take such tiny steps," Aeris joked. He only looked more uncomfortable and she was certain he was avoiding her gaze now. She almost apologized, but frowned instead. "If you're going to be half-hearted about it, you might as well stop now."
Sephiroth stood still, looking down, his hand sliding off her waist. He glanced at their joined hands briefly. "Sorry..." he muttered.
Aeris held his hand in both of hers against her bosom. "You're such a quick learner, I'll bet you could be a wonderful dancer if you put any effort into it. Stop thinking about what everyone else thinks, just what you want."
"It isn't about what I want or don't want."
"Isn't it?"
"I can't..."
She peered up into his face with a soft smile. "The only one holding you back is yourself. Let go. Enjoy yourself."
Sephiroth met her gaze and shook his head helplessly. "I shall try..."
"That's more like it," she replied, beaming. She reached for his other hand to put it back around her waist. He began the dance again, still hesitant, but he seemed to be gaining confidence; she was willing to wait as long as he was willing to try.
"This is your first party ever, isn't it?" Reno asked of Minerva, who sat on his right. Rude was to his left, Elena next to him, and Reeve between her and Minerva. They'd finally gotten past the introductions and brief backstories and a few jokes, and he felt relaxed now, though the girl beside him did not. But then, she always appeared alert and ready. Relaxation was probably new to her, like a million other things.
"Yes," she replied simply.
He shook his head in amazement. "That must've sucked... being stuck in that lab your whole life."
"I suppose..." she agreed tentatively. She was turned slightly sideways, and her eyes were focused on the dancers beyond him.
"Yeah, that's definitely gotta suck," Elena remarked sarcastically. "Stuck in a lab with no Reno around. Oh, the horror."
Minerva frowned at her, but made no comment.
"You should have some fun," Reno said, ignoring his blond friend. "Make it a memorable experience and all."
"Simply being out of the lab is memorable enough for me."
He shrugged. "Normally, I'd be out dancing or something, but..."
"But what?"
"But Reno thinks you're cute and wants you in his bed," Elena replied, cutting Reno off.
He glared at her. "I do not! You're just jealous 'cause you don't have anything remotely resembling a boyfriend."
The blond stuck her tongue out at him. "Unlike you, I'm not obsessed with the opposite sex."
"Nah, you're just pining after a dead guy who never even-"
"Reno," Rude interrupted. "That's enough."
The redhead shot him a glare and muttered under his breath, "My best friend, always sticking up for her."
"Hey, no hard feelings, Reno," Reeve said amicably. "It's just that none of us like it when you talk about Tseng like that..."
"Why should it matter what I say? He doesn't care. He's dead."
Elena flinched. "Reno-"
"He's dead," he repeated. "And he ain't comin' back. So get the hell over it."
"Sephiroth said-"
"Sephiroth?" Reno scoffed. "You're going to rely on Sephiroth to bring him back?" She glowered at him and opened her mouth.
"How long has it been?" Minerva cut in before any more angry words could be said.
"What?" the blond asked, blinking.
"Since his death."
"Five years..."
"Then it is possible."
Elena brightened. "Really?"
She nodded. "Yes. But do not get your hopes up."
"Right."
Reno rolled his eyes. "Of course she'll get her hopes up."
"Oh, Reno, keep your nose out of my business and go back to courting Minerva or something."
He was about to make some retort when Minerva caught his eye and shook her head. "It does not matter. Let her think what she wants."
He sighed and nodded. "Fine. Where were we anyway, before Laney decided to interrupt?"
"You were going to tell me why you aren't dancing," the girl replied without hesitation.
"You've sure got a good memory," Elena remarked.
Reno ignored her. "Oh yeah. Well, I was gonna say that it was because you were such good company."
Minerva raised her eyebrows sceptically. "Me?"
"Yeah, you."
Elena snorted and got to her feet, loudly scraping back her chair. "Hey, Reeve, you wanna go dance or something? Mr. Romeo over there is getting on my nerves."
"I don't know how," he protested weakly.
She walked over and tugged on his arm. "Neither do I. Come on, we'll learn." Reeve gave in with a sigh and got up, following Elena out to the dance area.
"...she certainly does not seem to like you," Minerva commented.
Reno shrugged. "Yeah, she's like a sister or something."
She raised an eyebrow. "A sister?"
He nodded, looking back at her. "Yeah. Like a bratty, annoying, younger sister."
"I see..."
"Anyway..." he went on, shifting in his chair. "I think I might go looking for Aeris and see if she wants to dance once or twice."
"She already has a partner."
He blinked. "She does? Who?"
"Sephiroth."
"What? You're kidding!"
Minerva pointed out the pair on the dance floor. "See for yourself."
Reno twisted around to look. "Now that may be the strangest sight I've ever seen..." He paused, settled himself down to watch. "Actually, he's pretty good..."
"I have been watching and it seems to me that he is better than the others..." she suggested tentatively.
"He's just not doing anything fancy. That would be even weirder."
The girl tilted her head. "Why is it so odd? There are many other people dancing. Should it be so strange for him?"
"Well, yeah... I mean, you don't expect someone who's so antisocial to go out onto a dance floor. You have to get pretty close out there. It'd be really uncomfortable for him, wouldn't it? How did she get him out there in the first place?"
"Is it not obvious?"
"Huh?" Reno turned back to face her. "What do you mean?"
"Can't you tell how much she means to him? He would do anything for her."
The redhead snorted. "Sephiroth? Care about someone?"
"Yes. You cannot tell?"
"Nope. I guess I don't spend enough quality time with him, huh?" He scoffed again and ran a hand through his hair. "But why's he been avoiding her, then?"
Minerva shrugged. "He thought he repulsed her perhaps. He is too quick to think people hate him."
"Well, yeah. I can see that. A lot of people do hate him."
"But not Aeris. She could never hate anyone..."
Reno nodded his agreement and remained silent for a while, glancing back at Aeris and Sephiroth. Finally he turned back to Minerva and leaned forward. "So, since you don't think there's anything wrong with it, do you wanna dance?"
She blinked, startled. "Me?"
"Yeah, you."
"...what would you want to dance with me for? Surely there are other girls who are more preferable..."
"Aw, don't diss yourself like that." He grinned. "You're the prettiest girl here. Why wouldn't I wanna dance with you?"
Minerva stared at him with scepticism again in her eyes. "I was not referring to my appearance, although I doubt the truth in your words."
"What, then? I like your personality just fine, and if you're worried about not knowing how, I can teach you, easy."
"Reno, she is just as antisocial as Sephiroth," Rude reminded him softly.
"Aw, c'mon, I was just asking. So, what do ya say?"
"I... I don't know..."
"Now you're just stalling." Reno got up and stood beside her. "Come on, get up."
"If she doesn't want to, there's no point in making her," Rude persisted, watching.
"But she hasn't said no yet!" the redhead protested.
"Reno..." Minerva said, sighing and shaking her head. "All right." He extended a hand as she stood, but she did not take it. Shrugging, Reno turned and led her out onto the dance floor. The song was drawing to a close, so he waited, catching Aeris's eye as the music ended. The Cetra walked over to him, leading Sephiroth by the hand. She shook her head, and Reno grinned triumphantly.
Sephiroth looked amused. "You got dragged out here, too, did you?" he asked Minerva.
"So it seems," she replied dryly.
"Don't worry," said Aeris. "He enjoyed himself... didn't you, Sephiroth?"
The swordsman nodded, although appearing somewhat embarrassed.
"How about one more dance?" she asked, completely oblivious to the small audience.
"As many as you like," he replied softly, gaze lowered.
Aeris smiled, glanced at Reno and Minerva in a farewell gesture, and moved to an open spot for the next dance.
"So weird..." Reno muttered, shaking his head.
"I told you he would do anything for her."
"That's why he accepted... Why're you out here?"
"To let discomfort defeat me would be weakness," she stated.
"Well," he said, shaking his head, then trying a grin. "Time to see if you like to dance as much as the Great Sephiroth over there." He took her hand and moved close to put his other arm around her waist, then looked up to see how she was reacting. Her face showed nothing, but she felt very tense. Not a nervous sort of tense, but the kind when you were expecting a blow... "Hey, relax," he told her. "There's nothing to be afraid of; I won't bite."
"I cannot help it," she replied, her tone faintly apologetic.
"...oh." The music started up again and he danced with her as he would dance with any other girl. Why change for Minerva? She kept in step with him perfectly, picking up on everything immediately. But her muscles remained tense and her face expressionless, much to his disapointment. He slowed his steps to a near halt. "You don't like it?" he asked, trying not to sound accusing.
She blinked. "Why wouldn't I?"
"Well, you're not smiling."
"Am I supposed to?"
Reno laughed, relieved and amused. "That's what most people do when they're having fun!"
Minerva looked sheepish. "I would not know."
"You should try smiling sometime."
She only shrugged.
"Guess I can't make you..." he said.
At the conclusion of the song, he walked with Minerva back to their table and ordered a beer. Elena, who had returned with Reeve, rolled her eyes as soon as the word came out of his mouth, but he only grinned at her. There was no way he was going to go to a party and stay sober.
"Beer?" Minerva queried when a waitress brought him the requested drink.
"Yeah," he replied, taking a swig. "Haven't left a party sober since I was a kid."
"I do not understand..."
"Oh, um..." He chuckled a little. "Guess you've never had beer before... uh... See, it gives you a real high, but you drink too much and you get drunk, and then you really can't think straight and do a lot of stupid things... heh..."
"I take it you have gotten 'drunk' on several occasions."
"A lot of occasions is more like it," Elena said. "And he's done some very stupid things."
"I don't drink so much anymore," Reno said with a frown. "So don't you dare go and lable me an alcoholic."
Minerva tilted her head in question.
"I, uh, used to be one," he explained. "But we can't afford it now."
She nodded slightly, found no response to offer him.
The night wore on, many more drinks were ordered, and even Minerva began to feel at ease among these people. People who, perhaps, she could come to call friends. Rude spoke even less than she, although Reno seemed to be making an effort to include her in the conversation whereas everyone generally left their bald friend alone. Elena talked much, arguing frequently with Reno, and Reeve served as a peacemaker between them.
At some point Elena had switched places with Reeve to converse more easily with Minerva, though now she and Reeve were talking between them with Rude adding a word or two every now and then. Reno was working on yet another mug of beer and Minerva kept her eyes absently on the dancers.
"Minerva," Reno slurred, grinning crookedly and leaning over to take one of her hands. "Will you marry me?"
She blinked in surprise then, smiling faintly, took both his hands in hers and said gently, "Reno, perhaps you should try that question another day, with another girl... when you are sober."
"Naw," he said, grinning more broadly, "you're the only girl for me. You know that, right?"
She shook her head at him, then reached across the table to take his mug away from him. There was not much beer left, but she qas quite certain he needed to stop drinking before he did anything more foolish than proposing to her.
"Hey!" he protested, trying to snatch it back, but she held it out of his reach.
"No more alcohol for you tonight," she said. "It has done you enough harm."
"Minerva," Elena said quietly, "I think you're the best thing that ever happened to him."
The girl blinked and looked over at her questioningly.
The blond smiled. "That is, of course, if you're willing to put up with him."
"He is nice to me..." Minerva faltered.
Elena nodded. "Then maybe it is different this time, like he said."
"Hey, Min," Reno interrupted. "C'n I finish that mug? Please?"
She shook her head. "No."
"Please?" he begged. "I'll, umm... I'll do whatever you want..."
"How about you stop drinking?" she asked.
He sighed and laid his head down on the table, watching her sideways. "Mmkay. No more drinking."
Elena raised her eyebrows. "Yep, I think he's serious about this one."
Minerva blinked a little. "What do you mean exactly?"
"He really likes you. Take good care of him."
"So you actually do care about him?" she asked, a bit surprised.
The blond shrugged a little. "He's like a little brother or something. An annoying little brother, but you've gotta love him anyway, I guess."
The girl smiled faintly in amusement. "He said much the same thing of you."
"Did he now?"
"Yes."
"With the emphasis on the annoying part, right?"
Minerva nodded.
Elena shook her head and laughed. "Always nice to know I'm loved."
"I am sure he cares."
"Yeah, he probably does. He'd never admit it, though."
She did not reply.
"Hey, I'm tired of sitting around. D'you think you could get out on the dance floor again?"
Minerva blinked a little. "I suppose..."
"Well, I mean, Reeve's not much of a dancer-no offense, Reeve-"
"None taken," he replied over his shoulder. "I quite agree with you."
"-and not in a million years could I get Rude out there." She lowered her voice confidentially. "He's really shy around girls." She lifted her voice again. "Anyway... can you do the guy's part?"
The girl shrugged. "I could."
"All right!" Elena exclaimed, hopping up. "Let's go then."
Minerva got up more slowly, and Reno lifted his head slightly, watching her in confusion. She bent down. "I am going to dance with Elena. You stay here, and don't order any more drinks."
"Kay," he replied, laying his head down again and watching her until she was out of his sight.