Yugi's Grandpa was very happy. Today, his grandson was finally getting
married. To tell the truth, he didn't think that Yugi would ever get
married. With his huge-ass dog collar, even huger-ass eyes, the height of
a small garden gnome, and the freaky tri-coloured hair that defied gravity,
Yugi just wasn't the type that girls would swoon for. And then there was
his personality. The optimism of that kid was enough to grate on the most
patient of nerves, if that weird personality-switching thing didn't scare
them away first. Still, Yugi was a good person, and Grandpa was glad that
he had finally found someone worthy of being his wife.
The place Yugi chose to have his wedding was all too obviously decorated by Téa. There were gigantic white flowers *everywhere*; on the walls, on the ceiling, along the aisle, on the benches---Grandpa slipped and fell. On the floor. He grumbled ruefully, then choked. "Ackkphhhth! Téa! Why did you put white lilies in the champagne?!"
"hello, Yugi's grandpa! So nice of you to come! I *had* to put the flowers everywhere. The white stands for purity, a must for any wedding, and the hugeness of the flowers symbolizes the greatness of our friendship. Joey, Tristan, Yugi, and I have been there for each other through thick and thin"---here, a scary flame entered her eyes---"We stayed true friends, and the power of our friendship helped us overcome any obstacle. Like our loyalty and love, these flowers are *indestructible*!!!" Grandpa eyed the wet and broken flower he had ground his heel into after spitting it out and wisely decided not to mention it.
"Er...yes. How nice." Grandpa quickly downed the rest of his champagne. "Where's Yugi?"
"Oh, he's in there, spending some private moments with his fiancé," Téa replied, pointing to a room in a corner. Grandpa thanked her and walked to the white-lily-strewn door. He wanted to speak with Yugi and tell him how proud he was before the ceremony began. He also wanted to meet his grandson's fiancée. For some reason, Yugi had been keeping the identity of his future spouse hidden from Grandpa, which pissed him off to no end. This was his grandson after all, and he had every right to know whom he would be marrying; damned if he was going to wait until the service to find out!
He opened the door. When he could finally pick his jaw up from the floor, Grandpa weakly croaked, "Y-y-yugi...?" Yugi, however, didn't hear him. Of course he didn't. He was much too busy to hear him. Yugi was engaged in...something, with...something. It looked like he was passionately making out with thin air, actually. Creepy as hell. "Uh, Yugi?" Grandpa tried again, louder this time.
Yugi jumped guiltily, then turned bright red when he saw who had called him. "Um, hey Grandpa," he said nervously, eyes darting here, there, everywhere but on Grandpa.
"What the hell were you doing?" Grandpa asked, backing slowly out of the door.
"I was practicing my kiss for the ceremony," he said earnestly, in that annoyingly happy way of his. "I want everything to be perfect."
This seemed more or less reasonable, in a twisted sort of way, so Grandpa came back into the room. "I'm very happy for you, Yugi. You have all my blessings. But when do I get to meet your lucky fiancée? You certainly can't expect your Grandpa to wait until the ceremony."
"I'm sorry if you feel overlooked because you're the only one who hasn't met Yami yet. The proposal was just last week, and this whole thing is very sudden. This week has been a whirlwind, and I never had time to properly introduce you. The wedding will be starting very shortly, so please just be patient for a bit longer."
All that was said in the sincere little Yugi way, and Grandpa could do little but nod and settle for it. He wandered back outside, flicked some flowers off his seat, and settled in to wait. Not too much later, Téa sat down beside him. "Oh, this is going to be so beautiful! Imagine, two souls, bound forever by the promise of love, about to embark on their wonderful journey together! And their friends all around them, supporting them with devotion. This is what it's all about." Téa gave a happy sigh and yabbered on to herself about the wonderfulness of it all. Grandpa considered finding another seat.
Before he could relocate, however, the priest at the altar picked up his Book and signaled that it was time to begin. Yugi took his place at the altar, and Grandpa wondered idly about the fact that the priest began to speak before the bride was at the altar. In fact, the bride hadn't even shown signs of appearing. No one else found this strange, so Grandpa put it down as one of the new practices of youth today.
Priest: ~much blabbing~
Yugi: "I do."
Around this time, Grandpa distinctly feel that something was not normal about Yugi stating his vow when his...his...oh. My. Gawd. Yugi had done that personality flip-flop thing, and the slightly taller, vastly more masculine Yugi now also said "I do."
Priest: "Does anyone object? Speak now, or forever hold your peace."
Grandpa spoke now. "My grandson is marrying HIMSELF?!?!?! Is that even legal??? How can all of you just sit here like this is normal? How can you?! This is highly unnatural!!! You canNOT just go and marry your other split personality! You CAN'T!!! This is all wrong!!!"
Téa gave Grandpa a disapproving glare. "Love is love! Can't you just appreciate the beauty of two people intertwined for eternity?"
"But that's the problem, see---they're AREN'T two people! You can't just go and marry yourself!"
"Yo, I thought it was a little narcissistic at first, too, but y'know, Yugi and Yami are really in love, and if being wit' each other's gonna make 'em happy, then I say go for it, yo." Joey supplied his input in his usual barely coherent fashion.
"Exactly!" Téa exclaimed in triumph. "And if you can't be comfortable with that, maybe you shouldn't be here at all!"
Grandpa agreed. He got out of there as quickly as he could, but not before his weary old eyes had to be subjected to some heavy petting between Yugi and himself. It was weird. There was Yugi, fervently tonguing the air in front of him, while a voice not Yugi's moaned softly. Huh. As Grandpa got into his car and floored it, he wished them---him---whatever---the best of luck. They'd need it to pull this marriage off.
The place Yugi chose to have his wedding was all too obviously decorated by Téa. There were gigantic white flowers *everywhere*; on the walls, on the ceiling, along the aisle, on the benches---Grandpa slipped and fell. On the floor. He grumbled ruefully, then choked. "Ackkphhhth! Téa! Why did you put white lilies in the champagne?!"
"hello, Yugi's grandpa! So nice of you to come! I *had* to put the flowers everywhere. The white stands for purity, a must for any wedding, and the hugeness of the flowers symbolizes the greatness of our friendship. Joey, Tristan, Yugi, and I have been there for each other through thick and thin"---here, a scary flame entered her eyes---"We stayed true friends, and the power of our friendship helped us overcome any obstacle. Like our loyalty and love, these flowers are *indestructible*!!!" Grandpa eyed the wet and broken flower he had ground his heel into after spitting it out and wisely decided not to mention it.
"Er...yes. How nice." Grandpa quickly downed the rest of his champagne. "Where's Yugi?"
"Oh, he's in there, spending some private moments with his fiancé," Téa replied, pointing to a room in a corner. Grandpa thanked her and walked to the white-lily-strewn door. He wanted to speak with Yugi and tell him how proud he was before the ceremony began. He also wanted to meet his grandson's fiancée. For some reason, Yugi had been keeping the identity of his future spouse hidden from Grandpa, which pissed him off to no end. This was his grandson after all, and he had every right to know whom he would be marrying; damned if he was going to wait until the service to find out!
He opened the door. When he could finally pick his jaw up from the floor, Grandpa weakly croaked, "Y-y-yugi...?" Yugi, however, didn't hear him. Of course he didn't. He was much too busy to hear him. Yugi was engaged in...something, with...something. It looked like he was passionately making out with thin air, actually. Creepy as hell. "Uh, Yugi?" Grandpa tried again, louder this time.
Yugi jumped guiltily, then turned bright red when he saw who had called him. "Um, hey Grandpa," he said nervously, eyes darting here, there, everywhere but on Grandpa.
"What the hell were you doing?" Grandpa asked, backing slowly out of the door.
"I was practicing my kiss for the ceremony," he said earnestly, in that annoyingly happy way of his. "I want everything to be perfect."
This seemed more or less reasonable, in a twisted sort of way, so Grandpa came back into the room. "I'm very happy for you, Yugi. You have all my blessings. But when do I get to meet your lucky fiancée? You certainly can't expect your Grandpa to wait until the ceremony."
"I'm sorry if you feel overlooked because you're the only one who hasn't met Yami yet. The proposal was just last week, and this whole thing is very sudden. This week has been a whirlwind, and I never had time to properly introduce you. The wedding will be starting very shortly, so please just be patient for a bit longer."
All that was said in the sincere little Yugi way, and Grandpa could do little but nod and settle for it. He wandered back outside, flicked some flowers off his seat, and settled in to wait. Not too much later, Téa sat down beside him. "Oh, this is going to be so beautiful! Imagine, two souls, bound forever by the promise of love, about to embark on their wonderful journey together! And their friends all around them, supporting them with devotion. This is what it's all about." Téa gave a happy sigh and yabbered on to herself about the wonderfulness of it all. Grandpa considered finding another seat.
Before he could relocate, however, the priest at the altar picked up his Book and signaled that it was time to begin. Yugi took his place at the altar, and Grandpa wondered idly about the fact that the priest began to speak before the bride was at the altar. In fact, the bride hadn't even shown signs of appearing. No one else found this strange, so Grandpa put it down as one of the new practices of youth today.
Priest: ~much blabbing~
Yugi: "I do."
Around this time, Grandpa distinctly feel that something was not normal about Yugi stating his vow when his...his...oh. My. Gawd. Yugi had done that personality flip-flop thing, and the slightly taller, vastly more masculine Yugi now also said "I do."
Priest: "Does anyone object? Speak now, or forever hold your peace."
Grandpa spoke now. "My grandson is marrying HIMSELF?!?!?! Is that even legal??? How can all of you just sit here like this is normal? How can you?! This is highly unnatural!!! You canNOT just go and marry your other split personality! You CAN'T!!! This is all wrong!!!"
Téa gave Grandpa a disapproving glare. "Love is love! Can't you just appreciate the beauty of two people intertwined for eternity?"
"But that's the problem, see---they're AREN'T two people! You can't just go and marry yourself!"
"Yo, I thought it was a little narcissistic at first, too, but y'know, Yugi and Yami are really in love, and if being wit' each other's gonna make 'em happy, then I say go for it, yo." Joey supplied his input in his usual barely coherent fashion.
"Exactly!" Téa exclaimed in triumph. "And if you can't be comfortable with that, maybe you shouldn't be here at all!"
Grandpa agreed. He got out of there as quickly as he could, but not before his weary old eyes had to be subjected to some heavy petting between Yugi and himself. It was weird. There was Yugi, fervently tonguing the air in front of him, while a voice not Yugi's moaned softly. Huh. As Grandpa got into his car and floored it, he wished them---him---whatever---the best of luck. They'd need it to pull this marriage off.