Hey all, I know the name gives it this great majestic feeling of wisdom and understanding (or so I assume), but this is a really a story of idiocy and bias and over use of stereotypes. Don't say I didn't warn you. By the way, it's in 1st person.
Disclaimer – Tolkien is great and I have to accept that. My friend (happy molecule) started this whole trend about times.
Their Lives (and their sayings)
1. Galadriel
9 am
I get up. I have gotten up. Up I am.
10 am
I got up 1 hour ago.
100 years later
I have been up for 100 years.
(Italics are written by fellow writer happy molecule.)
1000 years later
I have cool hair. It is best hair in the world. I am brushing it.
1000000000 years later
I'm still brushing my hair.
2. Treebeard
11 am
We
11:01
Need
11:02
To
11:03
Learn
11:04
To
11:05
Talk
11:06
Faster
Merry and Pippin: yes
3. Boromir
11:01
That stupid elf, why does HE get to come along?
11:02
That stupid hairy hobbit thing, why does HE get to have the ring?
11:03
That stupid wizard, what does HE know?
11:04
That stupid dwarf, he's too short!
11:05
That stupid other hobbit, he's too fat! How am I supposed to carry him?
11:06
Those two other stupid hobbits, all they do is copy each other!
11:07
That stupid human, thinks he's so good!
11:08
That stupid other human, all he wants is the ring!
11:09
Wait a sec; I'm talking about me!
The next bit is conversations
Merry: I am hungry
Pippin: I am hungry
Merry: Let's get food
Pippin: Let's get food
Merry: I am a frog
Pippin: I am a frog
Gimli: that stupid elf!
Legolas: that stupid dwarf!
Pippin: this carrot is more orange than this potato!
Uruk: Man I stink!
Sauron: I can see you!
Saruman: yes Sauron, no Sauron, right away Sauron, as you wish Sauron…
Cookie: eat me
Piece of paper: eat me
Watch: watch me
Very stupid I know, but oh it was great fun writing about pointless speech. If you've come this far, congratulations. If you actually enjoyed that, Happy Molecule has a longer story about the fellowship going to the supermarket to buy shampoo for Legolas which is worth reading.