Chapter Nine – Confide In Me

It was way past midday when Spike finally managed to wake up. It always annoyed him that even though he was up all night, he still woke up during the day. He could hardly be a creature of the night when he was awake most of the daylight hours as well. He moved his foot across to the other side of the bed but there was nobody there, he hadn't really expected Dawn to stay in bed with him all day but it felt weird to wake up without her. He groaned loudly at the thought of getting up before deciding to lounge around for a little while longer.

Dawn and Willow sat together in the coffee shop waiting patiently for their order of tea and muffins. Service was always slow on a Sunday as it was the only café open and was usually crowded. They made small talk about the weather and school and shopping until they were finally served.

"I have been dying for a cup of tea for months," smiled Dawn, emptying a sachet of sugar into her cup. She stirred it and took a sip, sighing contently. "It's not as good as Giles' but it'll do,"

"So, why the big secret meeting?" asked Willow, picking a blueberry from her muffin and eating it.

"Well, I was gonna small talk my way into it but…" smiled Dawn. "Buffy told me that I could talk to you if things got too much and I needed to talk to someone,"

"Dawnie, of course you can. I'm always here for you, you know that,"

"Good because I need you to swear that you won't tell Buffy anything. This has to stay between us; I really don't want her to find out,"

"Okay, just me and you," said Willow, putting her hand over her heart loosely and grinning childishly, Dawn giggled but Willow was feeling uncomfortable. She didn't want to lie to Buffy and Dawn was acting so maturely that she felt weird.

"I didn't stay at Debbie's on Friday night," started Dawn, glad to finally be telling someone, Willow was wearing her "I knew it" look. "I stayed at Spike's, I mean, I was with Spike,"

"You mean… oh right… you mean like that," babbled Willow, clearly more embarrassed about the situation than Dawn was.

"It's really not that weird, Buffy's first time was with a vampire, it's just the same," reasoned Dawn calmly, eating her muffin as Willow struggled to come to terms with the news.

"It's not the same though. Angel had a soul; Spike is still all evil,"

"But Buffy slept with Spike too," said Dawn, Willow was stumped. "Will, I know this is weird for you but I think I'm falling for Spike. I mean, I have feelings for him and things feel right, surely that's a good thing?"

"It is. It's good that your first time was with someone you care about but if it was just a one off thing then…"

"It wasn't a one off; I stayed there again last night. We talked about stuff, y'know, how he feels about Buffy and me and it's what I want. Please don't mention any of this to Buffy though; I don't want to upset her,"

"He hasn't hurt you?" asked Willow, touching Dawn's bruised arm. "He hasn't done anything to upset you?"

"No, I got the bruises training. He'd never hurt me, Will, I know it. He just couldn't do it,"

"Dawn, I don't know what to say. Why did you tell me?" sighed Willow.

"Because I needed someone to talk to about this other than Spike. I just wanted somebody to tell me that it's okay to fall in love with him or that it's okay just to be with him,"

"You can't help who you fall in love with but I'm still worried about you. I mean, fifteen is a young age to start having sex and with Spike… he's a vampire, Dawn. A really evil vampire who could hurt you," said Willow, shaking her head.

"Buffy was only sixteen when she did it. And Spike may not have a soul but I know he would never, ever hurt me. He couldn't do it, even without the stupid chip," said Dawn, pouring a little more milk into her tea.

"You've really thought about this, haven't you?" asked Willow, Dawn nodded and continued to eat her muffin. "I can't tell you that it's okay or that I agree with you but if you feel ready and you want to be with him then do it. Don't ever let anybody hold you back from being happy,"

"Thanks Will. I'm so glad it's off my chest; do you think Buffy would be upset? I mean, I think she still has feelings for him,"

"She does still have feelings for him but she's getting there. I don't think you should tell her just yet," mumbled Willow, not wanting to think about how Buffy would take the news. As much as she would be upset over her own feelings for Spike, she'd still attempt to kill him for touching Dawn. Willow suddenly realised that Buffy wasn't the only one who would take Spike and Dawn's actions to heart. "We should probably keep this between us; I think Xander would be a bit upset as well,"

"Whatever you think is best, Will. I just wanted a bit of friendly reassurance," shrugged Dawn, polishing off the last of her muffin.

"Are you really sure about this, Dawn? I mean, I know you should do what makes you happy but is it really Spike?" asked Willow, her overly concerned nature taking over. Dawn looked at her, she didn't look hurt or upset but there was definitely something there. "I just mean that there's guys at school that are nice, right? Guys you could be happy with,"

"Willow, I want Spike. I know it's weird, I can't even believe it but I really like him. The guys at school are pathetic, they're so immature. Spike's been around forever, he doesn't treat me like some kid and he talks to me like I'm an adult, like I understand stuff," explained Dawn. "If you don't get that, its fine but don't expect me to listen to you try and persuade me to leave him,"

Dawn got up and walked away, leaving Willow in the café with her half-drunk cup of tea and a huge decision to make. She had made a promise to Dawn but if she was going to do something stupid then surely Buffy needed to know about it? Dawn hadn't meant to leave Willow in the café but she just needed to get away, there was no way anyone was going to accept the idea of them together. She knew that but she had hoped Willow would see how happy she was and just understand. She needed to talk to Spike, he'd know what to do about it, he'd know what she was meant to tell her friends and eventually what to say to Buffy.

"Mornin' sleepy-head!" she shouted as she closed the doors behind her and ran over to the bed, jumping onto her side and shaking Spike until he grabbed her by the shoulders and pushed her over onto her back. He rolled on top of her and kissed at her neck and ears until she was giggling too much and pushed him off. "I just told Willow,"

"God, what did Red say? Did she freak?" sighed Spike, sitting upright and looking down at Dawn.

"No, she was fine. She was a bit weirded out but I think it's cool. She's not gonna tell Buffy so we're fine for now but what about Xander and Anya and I want to tell Buffy eventually…" said Dawn, breathless from laughing.

"Do we really have to tell everyone, luv? Why can't we just get out of here and leave this lot behind? We could start all over again and no-one would be in our face about it,"

"Leave Sunnydale? What about Buffy?" asked Dawn, sitting up. Her face full of concern, she stared at Spike intently. He made a face as if he wasn't going to answer her but she continued to glare at him.

"Why not? There's nothing keeping us here; we could come back and see Buffy every now and again. I just want to get out of here; I've spent too bloody long in this God-forsaken town,"

"Just up and leave?" asked Dawn, Spike looked at her and touched her cheek. She smiled at the contact and sighed softly, it would solve all the problems. She wouldn't have to answer to anyone and she wouldn't have to justify herself or her relationship with Spike.

"What do you say, Nibblet?" he whispered in her ear before kissing her. She had already decided.