Part 4

Pain. Lots of pain. That's the first thing I register as I slowly come back into consciousness. Every muscle in my body feels likes it's been set on fire, then repeatedly beaten as it burns. I groan. Loudly. But there's no one to hear me. The room's empty. Lestat is gone.

It smells like cigarettes and sex in here. I try to sit up but just fall back into the soft sheets. Red. Red sheets. No. Not red sheets. White sheets stained red. Spike's white sheets stained red. Spike. Shit.

I'm in Spike's room. In Spike's bed. I had crazy, mind-blowing, monkey sex with a vampire who isn't Spike in Spike's bed. Shit. I've gotta get outta here. He'll be home soon. It's almost five AM. Damn it.

Summoning up as much strength as I can, I get up and begin frantically searching for my clothes. Naturally they're spread as far apart around the room as possible and some articles are completely lost in the piles of Spike's dirty clothes that lay discarded on the floor. Fuck. My bra, my bra. Where's my bra? I start calling it as if it'll come to me.

I'm still stumbling about the room, bloodied sheet clutched tightly around my naked body, calling my lost bra when I hear the front door open. My blood goes cold and I can actually hear my heart thundering in my ears.

His clunky Doc Martens thump across the wood floor. So slow. Like he's taking a step every hour. His footfalls become muted when he reaches the carpeted hall. Closer…closer…

Move! Run! My mind is screaming at my body and suddenly I'm running, ducking into the adjoining bathroom and slamming the door. Smart, Jade. Real smart. Lock yourself in his bathroom where there's no way out but the way you came in. Sheer genius.

I lean against the sink as I hear him coming closer and closer to the door to his room. Something feels hard and tight across my chest. A look in the mirror shows me the stream of dried blood from the two puncture wounds in my neck. Oh God. What have I done?

A shaky hand reaches up to touch the wounds. They're caked with blood and still sore. I wince as my fingernail scratches against one of the scabs, opening the wound anew and allowing fresh blood to trickle out.

The door to the bedroom opens. There's a moment of deafening silence and I'm positive my heart stops for that moment. In my mind's eye I can see him scanning the room- his room. His sanctuary. Seeing the missing sheets. A few stray drops of blood and probably some stray drops of something else. Smelling sex, my familiar pina colada shampoo, Lestat's cologne, and blood.

"Jade," he screams. His voice cracks with anger…and…fear? I hear him tear through the apartment. The door to my room, I suppose, crashes open. I hear the wood splinter and I wince with the sound. "Jade?"

There's something hot and stinging in my eyes. My vision blurs with the swelling of my tears and I begin to choke and gasp, clutching the corner of the sink for support. What have I done? What have I done?

*****

I stop tearing through the apartment in a blind rage and just stand, listening, smelling. There. A heartbeat. I follow it, running towards the sound. Into my room. I ignore the smells that bring forth my demon and violently push it away. There. In my bathroom.

I hear a sob from inside and try the knob. Locked. "Jade!" I scream. I can smell the blood. So sweet…so scared. Used to be I'd revel in the scent of that. But not now. Not when the woman I love is cowering in a bathroom afraid…afraid of me, afraid of something else? I don't know.

"Jade!" I scream again, pounding on the door. That's it. The wood of the door splinters under my boot, just like all the other doors in the apartment just have. With a crash the door hits the tiled floor, earning a shrill scream from the girl inside.

I charge toward her, but stop, taking in the scene. She's wrapped in my sheet. My sheet that used to be white. Now it's crimson. Soaked through with her blood. There're streaks of dried blood running down her chest and through the valley between her breasts where they disappear into the sheet.

Cor…she's huddled beside the sink, clutching onto it for dear life. Tears are pouring- literally pouring- down her cheeks and as she looks up at me she begins to shake violently. My knees begin to give out at the sight of her. I sink to the tiled floor, my eyes transfixed on her face.

"What have you done?" I hear myself ask. A fresh burst of agonized tears erupts accompanied by a sorrowful wail.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry," she chants over and over.

"Shh, pet." I gather her in my arms. She smells like him. Stupid bitch. She smells like blood and sex and an unfamiliar cologne. I force myself to ignore the demon that threatens to rise to the surface and whisper comforting words to her.

"I'm so sorry." Is all I can discern from her agonized mumblings until finally she calms down and her tense back muscles relax under the gentle circles my hands are rubbing. "I didn't mean to…in your room…I didn't mean…we just…I didn't realize until it was too late."

So that's it? She's not sorry that she fucked a vampire. She's not sorry that she's covered in her own blood now. She's sorry that it happened in my room. And she's very sorry that I'm angry with her.

Her big green eyes turn up to look fearfully at me when I go rigid at this thought. I push her away coldly. Bloody stupid bint. I come home, finally ready to profess my literally undying love for her and I find this- an apartment that reeks of another vampire, a woman that reeks of another vampire, and my room that reeks of another vampire.

I glare at her. Never in my life or unlife have I hated anyone as I hate her now. Love can do that. Love never comes alone. It brings friends. Jealousy, bitterness, and resentment are its frequent paramours. I've never been the kind of bloke to believe that "love means never having to say you're sorry" or that it was all happy shagging and rosebuds. Love is harsh and cruel and it consumes you. It can make you something you never thought you were or could be. Love doesn't move mountains. It bloody destroys them.

Jade's understood that. Even when she proclaimed that'd she'd never fall in love. She knew. She was never one of the sunny happy people. She was never unrealistic about it. And I love her for it. Love her so much it hurts.

My eyes find the blood-covered wounds on her neck. Lestat's a messy eater. But I know that this wasn't a snack for him. I know what he's doing. I know why Jade is sitting here now, not lying dead on my bed. And he won't get away with it.

Jade shivers and unconsciously pulls the sheet closer around her. Unwillingly my heart fills with sympathy. She looks so helpless. So lost. I gently take hold of her shoulder and help her to her feet.

"Come on, pet. Let's get you cleaned up."

TBC…

Please review guys! I really want to know what you all think about this!!