10:45 PM 2/10/2003
E-mail: lac31685@aol.com
By: Chuquita
Quote of the Week: -from dbz manga 142 "The Risky Decision"
Goku: (boldly) We will bring peace to the future! [holds arm up]
Everyone: YEAH! [hold arms up]
Bulma: (sarcasm) Great, you've taken over the world now.
Chuey's Corner:
Vegeta: And that will be a very frightening day indeed.
Goku: (happily) My first order of business as ruler of the world would be to rename Canada, Chicken Pot Pie; America, Double
Quarter Pounder with Cheese Land, and everybody gets free fish on Thursdays! And we all get to wear fancy hats!
Vegeta: That's stupid.
Chuquita: What's stupid?
Vegeta: All three of them! [points to Son's list] Well, maybe except the hat thing, but the rest of it's a bunch of baka,
disorganized random ideas!
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) What do you need a fancy hat for? You can't fit one ontop of all that hair.
Goku: Maybe we could just push Veggie's hair down and then get him a hat. [presses Veggie's hair back and smiles] See! You
can buy Veggie-sized hats! (glances over at Veggie) Wow Veggie you look weird with your hair down.
Vegeta: (slightly annoyed) Do you mind taking your large kaka-hand off my head?
Goku: OH! Sorry little Veggie!
Chuquita: (smiles) Hey Son-kun, chibi you is sleeping!
Goku: (looks down at chibi Goku who Veggie's still holding) Awww!! Veggie's such a good mommy!
Vegeta: (grits his teeth) I'm not a mommy.
Goku: Yes you are, you're Ji-chan's mommy! (to his chibi self) (baby-talk) Isn't that right widdle me!
Chibi Goku: (snoring lightly) Z..z..z.....
[loud trumpeting noise is heard beneath them; Veggie gulps and quickly puts earmuffs on chibi Goku's head]
Chibi Veggie: (trying to make his voice sound deeper) Greetings and hello gentlepeasants and gentleladies for your King has
arrived! [wearing a costume similar to King Bejito's]
Goku: (giggles) Heeheehee, look Veggie, extra little Veggie's got more facial hair than you!
Vegeta: (notices the fake beard and mustache his chibi self has on) (sweatdrops) Take those off before you make a fool out of
you--me--ourselves!
Chibi Veggie: (proudly) The King of Bejito-sei cannot remove his beard and mustache for they are glued on with rubber cement
and it hurts very bad when you grab at them.
Goku: [tugs at beard anyway]
Chibi Veggie: Oww!!
Vegeta: WHAT DID YOU DO _THAT_ for!
Chibi Veggie: (whinces as he rubbes his 'beard') I wanted it to look authentic.
Vegeta: It looks stupid.
Goku: I think it looks cute!
Chuquita: You're just saying that cuz he's Veggie too!
Goku: ...yes.
Chuquita: (curious) Why did you dress up like your father, chibi Veggie?
Chibi Veggie: I was bored...
Chuquita: ... (blinks; confused) Oh.
Goku: Does it come off?
Chibi Veggie: I'm not sure.
Vegeta: (slaps himself on the forehead and groans) Ugh! Baka chibi!
Chibi Veggie: (tugs at his 'facial hair') How am I gonna get rid of it?
Chuquita: Try washing the, err, rubber cement off w/soap & water.
Goku: OR you could shave it off.
Vegeta: NO HE CAN'T, KAKARROTTO! HE'S 7 YEARS OLD! HOW'S HE GOING TO KNOW HOW TO--
Chibi Veggie: (eagerly) I WANNA SHAVE!
Goku: [hands him an electric razor] (sweetly) Have fun! And don't cut yourself!
Chibi Veggie: WHEEE!! [starts to run off]
Chuquita: HEY WAIT!!
Chibi Veggie: (pauses) Hm?
Chuquita: (nervous laugh) Umm, Veggie, out of curiousity, where'd you put the fireworks?
Chibi Veggie: (expression goes blank) Uhhh...I don't remember! (cheesy grin) Don't worry, we'll find out where I put them in
about an hour!
Goku: Ooh ooh ooh! Chibi Veggie guess who I am! [powers up enough so his hair stands up w/o turing yellow] [spins around and
stops to reveal he is now wearing a larger version of Veggie's training outfit]
Chibi Veggie: You're adult me!
Goku: VEGGIE WINS! [hands him a candy bar] Thank you for participating, please come again.
Vegeta: (angry) WHAT ABOUT ME!
Goku: [hands him a box] You get a copy of our home game! See! [opens box to reveal gameboard and little mini plastic candy
bar]
Vegeta: (sweatdrops) Why do I even bother.
Goku: Come extra little Veggie! I will free you from the confines of your rubber cement and false facial hair!
Chibi Veggie: YAY! [both run off]
Vegeta: (lamely) (to Chu) Well?
Chuquita: I dunno, you wanna say it?
Vegeta: (examining tiny plastic candy bar) Why not? (to audiance) Here's part 2!
Summary: After Veggie accidentally hits Goku too hard, causing 'Kakarrotto' to re-appear. However, Kakarrotto's last memory
was at the age of 2. Will Veggie be able to kaka-sit this 'big baby' until Bulma is able to develop a way to bring Goku back,
or will Goku be stuck in jumbo-sized diapers forever? And is Veggie willing to change them?
*****************************************************************************************************************************
" I HATE YOU OUJI!! " Chi-Chi screamed while being forced to wash dishes inside the resturant for being unable to pay
or win her bet. It had been several hours since Goku had gone to the 'bathroom', " I KNOW he's behind this SOMEHOW! There's
no other logical explanation why Goku would be in the bathroom for this long! " she exclaimed, " I bet that evil little
Ouji's doing HORRIBLE TERRIBLE things to my Go-chan in one of those stalls right now! " Chi-Chi shuddered at the thought,
then turned to the manager and smiled cheesily, " Umm, excuse me sir, may I use the bathroom for a moment please? "
The manager looked at her skeptically, " Only if you don't bail out like your 'acclaimed human-garbage-disposal'
did. "
" Haha, great! " she pulled off the rubber gloves she was using on the dishes and ran back into the main section of
the resturant. Chi-Chi sneaked towards the men's room and kicked the door open, " AH-HA!!! " she pointed accusingly, " I'VE
GOT YOU NOW YOU EVIL LYING CHEATING LITTLE CREEP!!! "
The sole occupant of the room, a slightly pump middleaged man washing his hands in the sink, stared at Chi-Chi in
fright and surprise. He nervously reached slowly towards the paper towels, quickly grabbed one, and dashed out of the
bathroom.
" Umm, goodbye then. " Chi-Chi sweatdropped, embarassed, " Heh-heh-heh.. " she then narrowed her eyes, " Stupid
Ouji. " she walked through the bathrooms, then noticed a newspaper on the floor and picked it up. Chi-Chi cried in disgust as
a rather loud, all-to-familiar smell entered her nostrils, " EEW! OUJI!!! " she dropped the paper, " He WAS here! " Chi-Chi
growled only to have her face suddenly go pale, " Oh my God, he WAS here. That means he really DID take my Go-chan! And I let
it happen because I let Goku go in there unsupervised!!! " she wailed, then grabbed the newspaper and started beating it
against the side of the stall, " I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU!!!! "
" *A-HEM* " a voice cleared its throat from behind her. Chi-Chi face-faulted and turned around to see the manager,
" Having, 'trouble' with the newspaper, Mrs. Son? "
" Uhhh... " Chi-Chi blinked, unable to think of something to say.
" You, do you you're in the wrong bathroom, don't you? "
" OOH! OF COURSE I KNOW I'M IN THE WRONG BATHROOM! I CAME IN HERE TO CHECK ON MY GO-CHAN WHO HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED BY AN
EVIL OUJI WHO HAS TRIED TO KIDNAP AND ENSLAVE MY HUSBAND A NUMBER OF TIMES AND IF I DON'T GET OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW HE'S
GOING TO SUCCEED AND I CAN'T ALLOW HIM TO SUCCEED!! " Chi-Chi exclaimed, grabbing the manager and shaking him by the collar,
" So you see you have to let me leave! I promise I'll come right back and Goku will help me with the dishes! I just have to
DESTROY THE OUJI FIRST!! "
" An "evil" ouji. " the man said skeptically.
" YES! Don't you believe oujis can be evil!!! " she snapped.
" What's he the ouji of? " the manager cocked an eyebrow.
" You wouldn't believe me if I told you. " Chi-Chi said flatly, " So-can-I-go? "
" Eh..alright. Grab your freeloading friend and get both your rears back here so you can pay me for all the money you
owe. " he snorted.
" HOORAY! " Chi-Chi cheered, dropping him to the floor, " I mean, sorry about that. " she laughed nervously as she
helped him back up, " I'll be right back! Trust me! " Chi-Chi gave him a thumbs-up, then dashed out of the resturant.
The manager sighed, " Yeah right, she said that about the food too. "
" La la la la la la la! " Bulma's mom, Mrs. Briefs sang to her self as she brought a plateful of cookies into the
living room and set them down on the table.
" *nna*nna*nna*nnah! " a knawing sound came from behind her. Bunny opened her eyes and peeked over the side of the
couch to see Kakarrotto chewing on the corner of the furniture. There were dozens of deep teeth-marks on the ripped couch.
" Why hello Goku, Bulma didn't tell me you were coming over. " she said pleasantly, closing her eyes again. The still
-diapered saiyajin looked up at her, his teeth in mid-bite of a piece of her couch. Kakarrotto blinked twice, then went back
to eating it. Bunny sweatdropped, " I left some cookies on the table if you're hungry. " she said.
" Nahbada wa! " Kakarrotto snapped at her.
" ... " Bunny blinked, " Umm, oh-kay then Goku. I'll be in the kitchen if you need anything. " Bulma's mother said,
then left.
Kakarrotto sniffed the air, then crawled over to the table with the cookies on it and licked his lips, " Nummy! "
" Alright! I'm ready! I can do this! " Vegeta said confidently as he stood infront of the mirror in his room wearing
a radiation suit, " BWAHAHA! Kakarrotto's not getting his jaws anywhere near me THIS time! " he laughed proudly, the suit
even stretching to keep his tail safe. With that he teleported down to the lab, " Hey Bulma do you have any muzzles? "
" Muzzle--WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?! " Bulma fell over at the suit and helmet the ouji had on.
" It's called bond-prevention safety, got a problem with that? " the ouji narrowed his eyes, " Now where do we keep
the animal muzzles? "
" Uh, over there. " Bulma pointed behind her.
" Perfect! " Vegeta grabbed one of the larger ones, " This will definately keep me my body kaka-bite free! It should
fit Kakarrotto, it looks big enough. "
" Why are you trying to put a muzzle on Goku? " Bulma sweatdropped.
" Kakarrotto 1.0. " he corrected her.
" *sigh*, Kakarrotto 1.0. "
" Bulma, remember me telling you before that I couldn't complete the saiyajin marriage ritual with you because I was
worried I'd accidentally kill you in the process? (Which is also why you're still only the partially-legal saiyajin oujo). "
" Yes. "
" Well there would need to be a slight blood-sharing between the two parties. If Kakarrotto were to accidentally
bite me due to his nonexistant teething disorder than by the time he got his memory back he could literally control me like
a brain-dead zombie-puppet at will. That and he'd be the oujo. AND I DON'T WANT KAKARROTTO TO BE THE OUJO!! " Vegeta waved
his arms in the air in a panic.
" If that's all it takes I could easily perform a blood transfusion on us. I mean, if that would prevent Goku from
accidentally becoming your 'oujo' in any way shape or form I wouldn't mind. " Bulma shrugged, " As long as you don't have any
strange alien diseases in your bloodstream I'm supposed to know about. "
" No as a matter of fact I happen to be 'disease'-free and....wait, what's a blood transfusion? " the ouji paused,
confused.
Bulma sighed, " It's like the end of your "mating" ritual, only without biting. "
Vegeta sweatdropped, " WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME ABOUT THIS BEFORE!!! "
" I had no idea that was the 'part' you cut out! " she exclaimed, " A blood transfusion is normally used to give
blood from one person to another who has been severely injured and lost a lot of their own blood; but I guess we could give
it a try anyway. "
" GREAT! You get working on that while I cover Kakarrotto's mouth with this muzzle so he doesn't accidentally bond
us. " Vegeta looked optimistic with a big grin on his face.
" You're also going to go buy "Kakarrotto" some toys to play with after that's done so he won't have to wear it that
long. " Bulma nodded.
" WHAT! " Vegeta gawked, " I CAN'T DO THAT! THAT'S AN INSULT TO MY PEASANT!! "
" So is the dog muzzle. "
" ... " Vegeta looked down at the muzzle, which looked like something one would use to contain a crazy person, " Hmm,
point. " he said, " It is decided then! I shall muzzle Kakarrotto version 1 and then leave to obtain some squeaky toys to
stuff in his mouth instead! "
" Good boy. " Bulma patted him on the head like the ouji was as pet. She snickered at Vegeta while he glared at her.
" Hmmph! " Vegeta snorted, leaving the lab by teleporting, " I don't need your help or advice on this. I can take
care of Kakarrotto perfectly well on my own!! "
" HOW THE HECK AM I GONNA DO THIS!!! " Vegeta shrieked while staring at the now-completely-mauled couch, " Kakarrotto
ripped it into PIECES....with his TEETH! " he ouji shivered, then looked down to see a small chunk of wood and picked it up,
" AND HE _ATE_ THE FOOTREST!! What kind of stupid idiot would eat a FOOTREST! "
" Baga wa! "
Vegeta looked up to see Kakarrotto smiling at him, still crouched down on his hind legs, his arms dangling infront of
him.
" Glad to know even without the amnesia you still manage to retain the same common sense, Kakarrot. " Vegeta said
dryly, looking back down at the wood chunk in his hand.
" Coo-kee! " Kakarrotto held out a single cookie which remained of the dozens of cookies the larger saiyajin had also
'slaughtered' with his mouth. There was chocolate smeared all over his face.
" Yes Kakarrotto, that's a cookie. " the ouji sweatdropped.
" Hoblume canna jo pu cookie no Vehdgee! " Kakarrotto grinned, handing the cookie to Vegeta.
" Oh...for me. You, shouldn't have. " Vegeta laughed nervously, then pulled something out from behind him, " And look
what I've got for YOU, Kakay. " he held up the muzzle.
" NUMM'UMS! " Kakarrotto squealed, then took in deep breath and sucked the muzzle straight into his mouth like a
super-powerful vaccum cleaner. Vegeta stared blankly as Kakarrotto easily chewed the muzzle up, then burped dozens of little
confetti-like pieces of the muzzle into the air.
" ... " Vegeta blinked, then inched slowly back about a foot away from Kakarrotto, " Heh-heh-heh. " he chuckled,
" Oh-kay. You know what Kakarrotto, let's just forget about that part, huh. "
" Moomoo dawe? " the larger saiyajin licked his lips.
" No, I don't have anymore chewy treats for you. " Vegeta said flatly in his native language, then sighed in english,
" I don't get it! That thing isn't even edible and he chews it up like a piece of gum! " he groaned. An idea smacked the ouji
over the head and he grinned with delight, " GUM! THAT'S IT!! " Vegeta took off the radiation suit he had ontop of his
training outfit, then pulled a pack of gum out of his training pants pocket, " Kakarrotto-chan would you like some gum? " he
asked pleasantly in saiyago.
" Wopa "gum"? " Kakarrotto grinned cluelessly, cocking his head to the side.
" Oh, gum is a very yummy treat little peasants like you can chew to make their gums feel better, hence the name of
this fine, delicious product. " Vegeta said with a cheesy smile, ::I sound like an infomercial:: he mentally sweatdropped.
" YAY! " Kakarrotto squealed, grabbing the entire pack including the wrappers and chewed them up into a wad of gum
large enough to fit in nearly his entire mouth.
" That'll keep him busy and bite-free for the next couple hours. " Vegeta said happily, " I'm glad I thought of it! "
he boasted to himself, then looked back over at Kakarrotto, " SO! Kakarrotto now that you have some gum, how would you like
to come with "Vehdgee" to the toystore to buy some wonderful things for you to play with, eh? " he asked.
The larger saiyajin's eyes widened into two big black sparkily blobs, " Oh Vehdgee~~ " Kakarrotto mused in awe. The
ouji took another step backwards, " Aimine ne ko, pami ou-jeee! "
" Heh-heh, yes, I love you too, very much. " Vegeta gulped while he watched Kakarrotto chew through the huge wad of
gum in his mouth like butter, " Now, why don't you come over here and Veggie will drive you to the toystore and buy you some
nice kaka-presents! Then we can play together with them! " he smirked.
" Maba waaa? "
" Yes, realllly. " the ouji rubbed his hands together.
" WOO-HOO! " Kakarrotto cheered, " Toy-shopping with Vehdgee! " he squealed in saiyago.
" Heh-heh. " Vegeta laughed nervously as he watched Kakarrotto waddle wobbily towards the front door, " I'm starting
to think I'm being punished for something. "
" Well, I've narrowed it down to three things. The time Nappa and I blew up planet Arelia right after "saving" those
bug people who acclaimed us as heroes til I blasted them into oblivion, the time I tried to wish for immortality on planet
Namek, and this entire Kaka-servant-maid thing I've been attempting for the past 'umpteenth years. " Vegeta rattled off to
himself as he unstrapped Kakarrotto from a very large baby car-seat Bulma had built for them, " Wake up little non-amnesiac
peasant. We've made it to Toys'r'we. "
" Toyyyyyys? " Kakarrotto's eyes flew wide open and he grinned with excitement, " TOYS TOYS TOYS TOYS FOR KAK'RROTTO!
That is me! " he pointed to himself. The ouji had been teaching the larger saiyajin a very small amount of english on the way
up. Enough to have a basic conversation, but still much too little for anyone besides Vegeta himself to be able to
communicate with him.
" It's oh-kay if you speak saiyago in the store, Kakarrotto. They'll probably think we're just spanish or something."
Vegeta shrugged, " Besides I don't want you to sound completely stupid when you talk to me in there. " he helped the toddler-
-brained saiyajin out of the car and closed the door, " Just be quiet and pleasant so we can both get through this as
painlessly as possib--- "
" --WOW LOOK AT ALL THE PRETTY TOYS!!! " Kakarrotto squealed in ecstasy as he bound about the inside of the Toys'r'we
store, " Pretty pretty toys all for Kak'rrotto! "
" Ohhhh... " Vegeta groaned, hanging his head in embarassment, " I really wish he hadn't swallowed that gum! "
" All for me, Vehdgee? " the larger saiyajin clasped his hands together.
" Uhhh, yeahh, here. " Vegeta pulled a nearby pacifier out of a box on the shelf to his right, then shoved the
squishy end in Kakarrotto's mouth, " No talking, alright? " he said, slightly annoyed.
" Mmmph mmph mmefmpheee! " Kakarrotto muffledly answered, then quickly sped off deep into the toystore.
" GAH!! KAKARROTTO COME BACK HERE!! IF YOU TRIP AND FALL AGAIN I'M _NOT_ GOING TO RE-RE-TEACH YOU HOW TO WALK THIS
TIME!!! " Vegeta yelled, racing after him only to screech to a halt infront of many many eisles, " ...uh-oh. "
" Lalalalalalala. " Kakarrotto sang through his pacifier as he waddled through an eisle full of greeting cards only
to notice a bright shining light at the end of the eisle that led to another one. He slowed down his waddle and froze in
wonder at the seemingly glowing sign above the next eisle that read "stuffed toys", " Its boodypull... " he mumbled as drool
dribbled down the side of his mouth, " WHEE!!! " the saiyajin squealed, dashing into the stuffed toyland.
" Kakarrotto. KAKARROTTO! " Vegeta called out, wandering through a nearby eisle, " Now where could that baka be! "
" Umm, are you looking for someone sir? " a young man wearing a toys'r'we worker uniform asked.
Vegeta sent him a death-glare.
" Cu--cuz we can pa-page your friend over the--the--in--intercom if yo--you'd like? " the worker gulped nervously.
" Where is this "intercom"? "
The worker pointed to a box stationed on a nearby eisle. Vegeta smirked and walked over to it, then picked up what
looked like a walkie-talkie on a cord. He cleared this throat, then screamed into the reciever, " KAKARROTTO WHERE ARE YOU!!"
Everyone in the store wailed in pain from the loudness of the ouji's voice. Vegeta smiled as several people fell over
holding their ears in pain.
" Heh-heh, stupid humans. KAKARROTTOOOOOO!!! " he screamed louder.
Kakarrotto glanced up from the stuffed bunny he was feeding a plastic bottle to, then turned his attention back to it
3 seconds later.
Vegeta sighed, " So much for THAT. " he hung up the walkie-talkie, " Now if I were 2 years old and alone in a
toystore where would I go? "
" *FWOOM!* " two nearby eisles collapsed inward only to hold each other up in a pyramid-like shape while the sound
of hundreds of squeaky plush toys tumbled to the ground. Vegeta sweatdropped, " I'm not sure I want to know. " he teleported
over to the eisle and yelped to see Kakarrotto sitting on the floor underneath the 'pyramid' with dozens of plush toys in his
arms and a big grin on his face.
" My babies Vehdgee! " he said happily, cuddling the plush toys close to him. Vegeta narrowed his eyes, " I want them
Vehdgee can I peas! "
Vegeta groaned, " Ugh... "
" *suck*suck*suck*. " Kakarrotto quietly and curiously sucked on his pacifier as Vegeta pulled him along. The ouji
had purchaced a baby-harnass and since attached it around Kakarrotto making it look more like the larger saiyajin was wearing
a parachuteless parachute x-shaped strap around his body. There was a leash-like device that lead from the end of the rope
Vegeta was holding to the middle of the x; namely Kakarrotto's stomach-region. The ouji's other hand was pulling a cart full
of about 10 or 12 of the stuffed toys Kakarrotto had found in the large pile.
" This is DEFINATELY for that Arelian thing. " Vegeta muttered as he flipped through various baby-bibs; all
absurdedly too small to fit around Kakarrotto's neck, " I blew up their planet seconds before its king and queen were about
to 'embrace' each other and now I'm being punished by having all this free kaka-time and a brain-dead Kakarrotto so I can't
even attempt to enservantize him. " he sighed.
" You should try this brand. "
Vegeta blinked, then looked over to his right to see a smiling woman carrying a baby boy. She pointed to the blue bib
versus the red one Vegeta was holding.
" It lasts longer, especially for fussy babies. " she smiled.
" Err, thanks. " the ouji sweatdropped.
" Are you shopping for your first? "
" Well, this IS definately the first time something like this has happened to me. " Vegeta looked upward, half in
grief and embarassment.
" Oh I remember when I had MY first child. " the woman mused. Vegeta rolled his eyes and ignored her.
" Mommy mommy! Look at the big baby! " a little girl squealed several feet away. Vegeta froze and looked out of the
corner of his eye to see the small, pig-tailed girl poking Kakarrotto in the arm.
The woman from before glanced over at her daughter and let out a noise that sounded somewhere inbetween fright and
disgust, " AHH! Su-chan get away from that man! " she grabbed the girl's arm and pulled her away while Kakarrotto continued
to stare at them, sucking on his pacifier, " Honestly! What kind of weirdo gets his sick pleasures out of walking around a
toystore in a diaper. "
" KAKARROTTO IS NOT A WEIRDO!!! " Vegeta snapped at her, " HE HAS AMNESIA!!! I mean, EX-AMNESIA!!! "
The woman stood agast, " You KNOW that thing! "
A vein bulged angrily on Vegeta's forehead, " HOW DARE YOU CALL HIM A THIIIIIING!!! KAKARROTTO IS MY PEASANT AND HE
JUST LOST A HUGE CHUNK OF HIS MEMORY! I'M TRYING TO KEEP HIM HEALTHY TILL HE GETS IT BACK AND IF _ANYONE_ IS GETTING 'SICK
PLEASURES' FROM THIS IT'S WHATEVER FORCE UP THERE DECIDED TO DO THIS TO ME!!! " he raged, protectively gripping tighter on
the leash that led to Kakarrotto.
" Listen mister, I don't care HOW you and your 'peasant' get your kicks together but go do it some other department
store! " the slightly nerve-shaken woman snorted, " Honestly, what a couple of pervs. "
" I AM NOT A PERV!!! " Vegeta screamed, " ...WHATEVER THAT IS!!! "
" Beaten bananas, hmm. " the ouji said, now in the baby-food eisle with Kakarrotto, who was happily sniffing every
can of food across from where Vegeta was standing. The ouji opened the small can and dunked his finger inside, then tasted
it, " Bleh! That doesn't taste like bananas at all? What is this, some kind of condiment? " he held the can up only to have
his eyes bulge at the words 'baby food', " AAUGH!! _THIS_ is what HUMANS feed their young?! " Vegeta gawked, " I gummed
porkchops before I was 1! And these cans are so small I'd have to buy the whole eisle just to have a decent meal of it! "
" Mmmmmm! " Kakarrotto sighed as he sniffed a heavenly-smelling scent coming from another little can across the way.
" What's so "mmm" to you? " Vegeta set the still-opened can of 'beaten bananas' down on the counter and walked over
to the other side of the eisle.
" Wahhh!! " Kakarrotto opened his mouth and pointed upward at the can. Vegeta looked at the top of the eisle and felt
something short-circut in his brain as he read the sign.
" Vegetables. " the ouji read slowly with a blank look on his face. Then curiously held up his fingers and pointed
one out after each syllable, " Ve ge ta bles. That's....really strange. " he cocked an eyebrow, then grabbed several jars
and read the names on each one. The very-familiar-looking words suddenly slapped him across the back of the head, " Aah!
The--these are all saiyajin names. I mean, they LOOK like saiyajin names, they're just all spelled wrong. " Vegeta nervously
set a small jar reading 'raddishes' on the counter, " This is creepy. "
" Vehdgee! " Kakarrotto finally reached the can he had been sniffing and held it up, " Kakarrotto! " he grinned.
" Uh... " Vegeta took the can and read it, " Carrot. " he blinked, then opened the can to reveal a mushed up orange
goo, " Oh...it looks just like your gi.... " Vegeta turned a pale green.
" Vehdgee, if the food in the cans are named after saiyajins does that mean they're saiyajins that've been all mushed
up and put into jars for people to eat? " Kakarrotto asked in saiyago.
" N--no Kakarrotto, of course not. Why would anyone want to do that. " Vegeta laughed nervously.
" Cuz we're really strong? "
" ... " the ouji half-whimpered at the can in his hand, then stuck his finger in and ate some.
" VEHDGEE!! " Kakarrotto yelped, " That could've been my brother! Or my cousin! Or somebody else we know! " he gawked
in his native language.
" Mmmmmm... " the little ouji took his finger out of his mouth, " Not bad. " he happily swallowed the rest of it by
chucking the insides of the can into his mouth, " Pretty good, actually. "
Kakarrotto's eyes bulged out of his head.
" Calm down, Kakarrotto. This isn't made from saiyajin! It would taste like meat if it was. " he shrugged it off.
Kakarrotto looked partially relieved, " Besides, except for you and I we're all exti--- " Vegeta trailed off when he noticed
the big-eyed stare the younger saiyajin was giving him, " --rordinary warriors and we would have defeated whoever tried to
make us into a mushy food for toothless humans. "
Kakarrotto smiled up at the ouji proudly.
" Heh-heh-heh, yeah. " Vegeta laughed nervously. He quickly grabbed several more little cans of mushed carrots,
" Come on Kakarrotto, let's get out of here; I'll buy you some REAL food at the meat deli across the way. "
" Honobo wa? " Kakarrotto pointed at the mushed carrots, confused.
" So I like them! Big deal! " Vegeta exclaimed, his cheeks flushing a light red, " It's not like Kakarrotto 2 is
gonna know about it anyway! "
Kakarrotto stuck his finger in the near-empty mushed carrots can Vegeta had eaten from and tasted it, " BLEH! " he
stuck out his tongue with a repulsed look on his face, then happily grabbed another baby-food can labled 'mixed veggies' and
waddled after Vegeta and the cart.
" Hello human, I would like to purchase these baby-products. " Vegeta said as he placed the toys and baby-food on
the counter. The pile towered a good 3 feet. The girl behind the counter sweatdropped and peered out from behind it to see
Kakarrotto sitting there stucking his pacifer in a baby-harnass and diaper next to the impatient ouji. She laughed lightly.
" You're--you're kidding right? "
" ... " Vegeta sighed, " I wish I was. "
" Well, oh-kay then. " she started adding his items up, " That'll be $100.38. "
" Whoa... " the ouji muttered, then smirked, " Good thing I have Bulma's credit card! " he grinned at the plastic,
then handed it to her.
The girl bagged the items and handed them along with a recipt to the ouji, " Have a good day sir. "
" HA! " Vegeta laughed mockingly, then pulled on Kakarrotto's leash, " Come on Kakarrotto. "
" I wub u Vehdgee! " the larger saiyajin squealed. Vegeta's face flushed bright red.
" Heh-heh, right. " Vegeta made his way to the car and put everything in the trunk, then opened the backseat door,
" Alright Kakarrotto, hop in. " he looked down at the larger saiyajin, who waddled around to the front passanger's seat and
sat down.
" I wub Vehdgee! " Kakarrotto chirped happily. Vegeta sweatdropped.
" Well if you 'wub' Veggie so much then you'll get in the kiddie seat. " the ouji folded his arms.
" No. " Kakarrotto giggled.
" WHAT DO YOU MEAN "no, heeheehee" I CAN'T DRIVE WITH YOU UP HERE, KAKARROTTO! "
" Smoochie! " Kakarrotto held both his arms out.
Vegeta almost fell over, " What..did...you...say...? " a small vein bulged on his forehead.
" Smoochie for Kakay! Then listen to Vehdgee! " the larger saiyajin grinned widely.
" WHAT?! You never asked for anything like that before! " the ouji snapped, then froze, " Hey...waitaminute. If YOU
were Kakarrotto 2's subconsious and I've never called YOU inparticular "Kakay" before than that must mean since you were
bumped to the surface that Kakarrotto 2's still in existance and he is working YOUR subconsious the way YOU worked HIS! "
Vegeta said, proud of himself for figuring it out, " OH KAKAY YOU'RE STILL ALIVE AFTER ALL!! " he sobbed happily, hugging
the larger saiyajin, " I'm so happy!! I really thought I had lost you forever and I promise I'll never kick you in the
stomach again! "
" Smoochie now? " the saiyajin said eagerly.
The ouji sweatdropped, " Ugh, fine. " he cringed in disgust, then pecked the larger saiyajin on the cheek and spat
several times at the ground, sickened, " Now get in your carseat! "
" YAY! " Kakarrotto held his arms up as Vegeta strapped him in the baby-seat, " VEHDGEE'S THE BEST KISSER EVER!!! "
the large saiyajin shouted happily while several people walked by, snickering at the little ouji. Vegeta's face flushed,
embarassed; even though his back was to the passersby. He glared at the blissfully oblivious look on Kakarrotto's face, then
grumbled and got in the driver's seat.
" If this is some sort of revenge, Kakarrotto, it's NOT WORKING! " Vegeta snapped, starting the car.
" Wa kno. " the larger saiyajin said in a sing-song voice as the car drove off. He pulled the little can of 'mixed
veggies' out from inside his diaper and opened the can, then tasted some, " Neh! " Kakarrotto stuck his tongue out and made
a disgusted face. He stared blankly at the back of Vegeta's driver's seat and grinned. He mushed some of the mixed veggies
between his fingers and flicked them at the ouji's head.
" Oww! " Vegeta swatted whatever just hit him, then grumbled and went back to driving.
" Heeheeheeheehee! " Kakarrotto giggled, pulling out a whole handful of mixed vegetables and forming half a dozen
little balls in the palm of his hand and flicked them one by one at the back of Vegeta's head. The smaller saiyajin twitching
in annoyance everytime he was pelted with one of the baby-food balls.
" KAKA-RROTTO!! " Vegeta whipped around at the stop-light with a look of pure rage on his face. The larger saiyajin
only tilted his head in confusion. A happy smile on his face. Vegeta groaned, " Kakarrotto, did you do that? "
" Nuhba wa. " Kakarrotto shrugged, grinning stupidly. The ouji grunted, then turned around and sighed only to yelp as
another piece of food landed on his head.
" ERRRRRR... " he turned around and snarled at the larger saiyajin with his hands shaking in anger, " I swear if you
weren't in Kakarrotto version 2's body right now I would rip your arms off!...but you're are, so instead of screaming my
brains out and pouring every second of my attention onto you I'm going to punish you by doing something that I know for a
fact doesn't make little Kakays very happy. I'm going to completely ignore you. " Vegeta smirked, " Have fun all alone back
there Kaka-chan. " he turned his attention back to the wheel just as the light turned green.
" Vehdgee? " Kakarrotto squeaked out curiously.
" ... "
" Vehdgee, nobu patona. " the larger saiyajin said in a pouty voice, then picked up some of the mixed veggies mush
and threw it at Vegeta's head only to have the ouji not even move his hand to swat it away. Kakarrotto picked up a bigger
chunk and heaved it at Vegeta, " VEHDGEE NOBU PATONA!!! " Kakarrotto sniffled, his eyes beginning to water.
" Hmm, that's strange, for a second there I could've SWORN I heard something. " Vegeta said mockingly, keeping his
eyes focused on the road, " Oh well, I guess it was nothing important. "
" WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! VEHDGEE NO LOVES ME ANYMORE!!"
Kakarrotto wailed, tears flying down his cheeks.
" No-Kakay-that's-not-true!!! " Vegeta yelped, snapping to attention and turning around just intime to see Kakarrotto
wailing at the top of his lungs, still in the diaper which served as a healthy reminder of the saiyajin's mental state.
Vegeta put the capsule car on autopilot and hopped into the backseat, " Kakay don't cry. " he said sadly, sitting
down next to him, " You're a wonderful peasant; infact, the best peasant I've ever had! You know Vehdgee loves you, right? "
" Reallleee? " Kakarrotto stared over at him w/big sparkily eyes.
" Heh-heh-heh-heh, yeah, really. " the ouji's cheeks turned a light red.
" OH VEHDGEE!! " Kakarrotto lundged forward and hugged Vegeta tightly, flopping the ouji back-down on the backseat,
" Kakay paana-aaai, Vehdgee! " he sniffled.
" Uh, heh-heh, heh-heh, yeah. " Vegeta laughed nervously while being pressed down upon the couch. Kakarrotto grinned
and opened his mouth to expose what his mind imagined were gums and bent down to nibble on Vegeta's tail until he stopped
suddenly as he felt something just deposit itself in his pants.
" Uh-oh. "
" Uh-oh? Uh-oh WHAT?? _WHAT_ is "uh-oh"?! "
" Ahh, so THIS is uh-oh. " Vegeta said sarcastically while he pinched his nose, now sitting upright again and across
the backseat couch from Kakarrotto, " You could've warned me if you were about to take a dump, Kakarrotto. " the ouji
grumbled. Kakarrotto, meanwhile, had a very pleasant look on his face from the fact that he actually had just sent his own
breakfast down south for the winter.
" Hahaha! Happy! " Kakarrotto chirped.
" Yeah I bet you are. " Vegeta cringed in disgust, " You're lucky this car has an autopilot or I wouldn't have come
back here at all! " he turned to looked out the window. Kakarrotto grinned at the smaller saiyajin's tail twitching in the
air and reached over to grab it. He stuck the end of the ouji's monkey-like tail in his mouth and started chewing lightly to
soothe his supposed hurting gums. Kakarrotto started to bite down harder and in turn sent a wave of pain through Vegeta's
tail and into his body.
" AAUGGH!! " he screamed in shock, then turned the the larger saiyajin who still had the smaller one's tail in his
mouth and turned a pale green, " KAKARROTTO LET GO OF THAT!!! LET GO LET GO LET GO!!! " Vegeta pulled at the other end of his
tail, " YOU DON'T PUT OTHER PEOPLE'S LIMBS IN YOUR MOUTH, IDIOT!!! NO NO NOOOO-- "
" --OOOOOOOOOUJI!!!! "
Vegeta froze and poked his head out the window to see Chi-Chi about 2 miles behind them running as fast as she could,
" Oh crap!! It's Onna!! " he gulped. Vegeta quickly grabbed a blanket off the top of the backseat and covered Kakarrotto with
it, " Kaka-chan, I want you to stay still; don't move, don't budge, don't talk, but don't forget to breathe, alright? "
" Mmmm~~ *suck-suck*. " Kakarrotto continued to gum the tip of the ouji's tail.
A light blush line appeared over Vegeta's nose, " GIVE...ME...THAT!! " he yanked his tail free only to find the tip
was completely soaked in drool, " Eew... " the ouji quickly checked for any bite marks and sighed with relief to see none of
the many teeth indents in his tail had breached the skin, " You, don't, EAT ME! " Vegeta snapped, then completely covered
Kakarrotto, who started to sniff Vegeta's boot and began to chew on that, unknowingly to the prince.
" OUJI!! " Chi-Chi finally caught up the car, running beside it, " ALRIGHT YOU LITTLE DEMON OUJI! WHERE'D YOU PUT
GOKU!! "
" Who? " Vegeta said casually, smirking.
" You know who I'm talking about. " she said in a dangerous tone, " WHERE IS HE!!! "
" I thought you were taking Kakarrotto to a resturant for food and fun. " Vegeta mocked, " Or did Kakay get bored and
ditch you with the bill because you're a horrible dinner host? "
" It was for BREAKFAST, you moron. "
" ...oh. " Vegeta blinked, " Anyway, wherever Kakay is I'm sure he's happier than being all alone with YOU
somewhere. " the ouji snickered.
" I wouldn't be too sure of that. " Chi-Chi narrowed her eyes. She looked inside the car and cursed when she didn't
see anyone else inside with Vegeta. Chi-Chi's eyes suddenly bugged out as she sniffed the air, " Eew, what's THAT? "
Vegeta's face flushed. Kakarrotto had just dropped another load of waste into his diaper.
" Nothing. " Vegeta said shortly.
" It smells HORRIBLE in here! " Chi-Chi gagged, then noticed a little can on the backseat and picked it up.
" HEY YOU CAN'T TAKE THAT ONNA! THAT'S PRIVATE PROPERTY! I CAN HAVE YOU SUED AND THROWN IN THE DUNGEON FOR THAT!!! "
Vegeta screamed.
" West City doesn't HAVE a dungeon, Ouji. It has a jail. "
" THEN I'LL HAVE THEM THROW YOU IN THERE THEN! "
" --is this a jar of BABY food? "
" ... " the ouji froze and slunk back in his seat unassumingly.
" 'Mushed Carrots'? " Chi-Chi cocked an eyebrow at the near-fully-eaten little can. Kakarrotto reached his arm out
and quickly pulled his own can of 'mixed veggies' off the backseat and under the blanket with them, " Just when I thought you
couldn't get any sicker. " she said flatly, then sighed.
" Give it back and go away. " Vegeta snorted bluntly.
" HA! And let you get anymore sick kicks out of anything with the word 'carrot' in it, I don't think so Ouji. " she
shook her head.
" GIVE 'IM BACK!! " Kakarrotto shouted from underneath the blanket.
Vegeta gulped and kicked his foot under the blanket, lightly smacking Kakarrotto on the cheek.
" What was that. " Chi-Chi glared.
" Radio. " Vegeta said cooly, ::I can't let Onna take Kakarrotto back to that kaka-shack like THIS. She doesn't know
how to care for a baby saiyajin! Kakarrotto 1's brain is highly impressionable right now and VERY easily manipulatable. I'm
NOT going to let Onna turn him and Kakarrotto 2's subconsious into some 'ouji-hating' maniac!::
" The radio isn't on, Vegeta. " Chi-Chi smirked, " You have my Go-chan in there with you right now, don't you? "
" Ha, Onna if I had Kakarrotto-chan in here with me I think I'd let you know by now. " Vegeta folded his arms while
Kakarrotto went back to chewing on the ouji's boot. He had found a concentrated space over the middle of Vegeta's boot that
would surely rip for his teeth if he gummed it long enough. Of course the fact that the front half of the boot was inside his
mouth made the task slightly harder due to Kakarrotto could easily choke on how deep in his mouth the 'saved' portion of the
boot was. He smiled happily; whatever the boot was made out of sure made his aching 'gums' feel better to chew upon.
" Hn.. " Chi-Chi bit her lip, " You WOULD have made it known already if Go-chan was trapped in that smelly,
Ouji-mobile of yours. "
" Mmm~~~ " a pleased sound came from under the blanket next to Vegeta, who shifted uneasily at the noise.
" GOKU!!! " Chi-Chi yelled, " SON GOKU IF YOU'RE UNDER THAT CHEAP OUJI-STINKING SHEET THEN YOU GET OUT OF THIS CAR
RIGHT NOW!!! GO--KU!!! "
::Thank God this one only answers to 'Kakarrotto'.:: Vegeta mentally sighed with relief, then let out a strangled
yelp of a noise as he distinctly felt teeth gracing the top and bottom of his right foot. He quickly backed up and tried to
pull his foot out of his boot before the teeth could dig through his flesh, ::KUSO!! HE'S GOING TO BOND US!!:: the ouji
panicked, a look of horror written all over his face, " KAKARROTTO LET GO OF MY FOOT!!! " Vegeta wailed, kicking his foot up
and down and accidentally shoving the blanket off Kakarrotto's head, " I WANT YOU TO DISLODGE YOUR MOUTH FROM MY BOOT RIGHT
NOW! But slowly as to not rip a large chunk out of my foot causing my blood and your very large amount of kaka-drool to
interact with each other. "
" Rrrr.... " the larger saiyajin whine, " Boot goooooood. " he pouted, digging his teeth in to the point where they
layed ontop of the smaller saiyajin's foot.
" Yes, boot-good. I-understand-now. Veggie-understands-Kaka-chan-perfectly, hahahahahaha. " Vegeta said quickly,
nervous sweat pooring down his face, ::Dear God I might have to cut off my foot before it infects the rest of my body...I
DON'T WANT TO CUT OFF MY FOOT!!:: " Ka-ka-ka-ka, Kakarrotto, how about this. You take your mouth off my boot. I take my
boot off my foot. I give the boot to you WITHOUT MY FOOT INSIDE IT, and then you can chew ONLY my boot until it is nothing
more than a mere wad off the items that people use to create boots with. "
" ... " Kakarrotto blinked, then only dug even closer into the boot with a curious look on his face.
" OH KAMI!!! " Vegeta wailed, squinting his eyes shut and covering them with his hands, " DON'T LET HIM BREAK THE
FLESH!!! "
" Goku's, trying to EAT you, Ouji? " Chi-Chi looked theroughly confused. She smiled surprisingly, " He wants to eat
you! That's great! If he wants to eat you that means my Go-chan doesn't care whether your stinky Ouji carcass lives or
dies! " she chucked the mashed carrots over her shoulder and sweatdropped to hear a loud screeching sound from behind her.
" You just caused a 5-car pile-up. " Vegeta said dryly.
" But that's not important! " Chi-Chi perked up, then stuck her head through the window, " Say Goku, if you want to
rip the Ouji's body apart into pieces and devour it like a large plate of roast beef then why don't we take him back home
and I'll roast him to a crisp. We'll cut off his head and tail, cover him in barbaque sauce, and you can eat him! Why I'll
even do a good deed and feed whatever you don't eat to the woodland creatures that live outside our home. "
" ... " Vegeta started at her, shocked and disturbed, " And you call ME sick! " he sweatdropped.
" Hey, if it gets rid of you I'm all for it, you evil little monster. " Chi-Chi muttered, sending a death-glare at
him, " So, Goku! What do you think? " she said sweetly to the larger saiyajin.
" Nupaa bo gawa! " Goku let go of the boot to yell in a frightened tone. Vegeta quickly freed his foot and lept back
to the driver's seat, " Vehdgee! Kamake rru wehna! " he cried, starting at the ouji and pointing at Chi-Chi.
" What the heck are you--*GASP*--YOU'RE SPEAKING IN _OUJI_ AREN'T YOU, GOKU! " Chi-Chi gawked, then growled, " AND
WHY ARE YOU WEARING A DIAPER!! "
Vegeta slammed on the gas pedal, sending them flying down the road. Kakarrotto tumbled a bit on the backseat. Chi-Chi
stared at them in disbelief, then ran off in their direction.
" AND SINCE _WHEN_ DOES THE OUJI HAVE _BANGS_!!!! "
" *whew*! I think we're safe now. " Vegeta wiped the sweat off his brow as he sat still in the car with Kakarrotto.
The two saiyajin were in one of Capsule Corp's garages and the ouji had just closed the garage door on them, " Kakarrotto,
if Onna had taken you home in this she'd easily learn of your amnesia and use it to her advantage to train you to hate and
kill me! " he said in saiyago, then shuddered at the thought.
" But I don't kill Vehdgee. I love Vehdgee! " Kakarrotto smiled at him.
Vegeta looked down at his bootless foot, " Right... " he said sarcastically, getting out of the car. He walked
around to the backseat and opened the door, " You oh-kay in there Kakarrotto? "
" Vehdgee I saved 'um! " Kakarrotto grinned.
" Saved WHAT?! "
Kakarrotto pulled the can off 'mixed veggies' out from under the blanket, " Ta-da! " he patted the can, " That loud
lady won't take MY food! "
" Well Kakarrotto, that 'loud lady' is a very bad person. She might try again. After all, Onna's been plotting to
kill your 'sweet widdle Vehdgee' for a long long time now. " he smirked.
A look of worry covered Kakarrotto's face, " Loud lady wansa make Vehdgee's body shut off? "
" Yes, you might say that. And her name is Onna. "
" Onna. " Kakarrotto repeated, " Onna's a bad person! " he sniffled.
" Of COURSE she is! Why, Onna's the one who was ready to slice my head off and fry me in a deep fat frier while you
were busy, umm, " he looked back down at his naked foot.
" --chewing on Vehdgee's shoe? " Kakarrotto offered.
" *fake-sniffle* Hai, Kakay-chan!! " Vegeta got into the backseat and sat down next to him, " It's so terrible! Onna
tries to kill me night and day! Onna hates us saiyajin. She just doesn't understand how sweet and wonderful our species'
really is! " he overdramatically latched onto the larger saiyajin's arm.
" Like Freezer? " Kakarrotto blinked.
The little ouji nodded sadly, " Uh-huh. "
" Vehdgee that's HORRIBLE! " Kakarrotto sniffled, " You are so nice to me. You buy me toys and food and yummies and
nice clothes to wear and a warm room to sleep in and, Vehdgee if Onna is a bad person like Freezer let's have the other
saiyajins help us kill her. "
" ... " Vegeta blinked, " KILL?!!...oh yeah, your natural saiyajin urge to needlessly destory all that you find a
threat to your life is active again since your original personality is back. " he nodded, " However, I do not plan to
"kill" Onna. Not physically anyway. Psychologically, however, is a completely different story. " Vegeta rubbed his hands
together menacingly, " But for now let's just ignore her existance till she rears her ugly face again, huh? "
" YAY!! " Kakarrotto cheered, " Vehdgee is brave! "
" That I am. " Vegeta said boastfully as he picked the larger saiyajin up and teleported him to the living-room
couch. He then teleported away and back into the room carrying the bags from the trunk and set them down, " Well, I'm glad
that part's over. " he held up an unopened jar of 'mushed carrots', " I wonder if you have to keep these refridgerated. "
" Gift for Vehdgee! " Kakarrotto said eagerly.
" Really? "
Kakarrotto pulled slightly at his diaper, sending a huge burst of yellowish-brown gas into the air. Vegeta felt his
bottom left eyelid twitch.
" Gift. " Vegeta said flatly.
" GIFT!! " Kakarrotto squealed.
" For "Vehdgee". "
" That's YOU! " Kakarrotto held his hands out towards the ouji.
" Ohhhh boy. " Vegeta turned away, then zipped over to the door to Bulma's lab, " BULMA!!!! IT'S YOU'RE TURN!! I'M
NOT READY TO FACE ANOTHER ONSLAUGHT OF RECTORAL WASTE COVERED KAKA-TUSHIES!! "
" "Tushies"!! " Kakarrotto grinned happily, " I like that word! " he said in saiyago.
" BULMAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! " Vegeta shouted, then grunted when he got no response. The ouji flung open the door to the
lab to reveal another door to the lab he hadn't seen before with a note taped to it. He snorted and ripped it off the door,
" 'Dear Vegeta-kun, working with radioactive chemicals; important project, dad is supervising. Please avoid entering the
lab until the project is completed unless you want to sprout an arm from your back. Love, Bulma'. " the ouji sweatdropped,
" No thanks. " he slammed the first door shut, " I'd rather not be a fool and gain another limb in a place it's not
supposed to go. " Vegeta turned back towards Kakarrotto, " Well Kaka-chan, I guess you're going to have to wait a couple
hours to get that diaper changed. It takes Bulma at least 45 minutes just to wipe-down the lab and herself after she's
usually done working with anything radioactive. " Vegeta explained.
Kakarrotto's eyes watered, " Buh, buh, buh, buh, buh Vehdgee eh burns!!! "
" Deal with it! " Vegeta snapped, " You KNOW I'm uncomfortable about changing your diapers! Changing your diapers
means I have to take your smelly diaper off your rear end, then CLEAN your rear end and have to look upon organs I would
rather NEVER see in my lifetime, then dry you off, then put a NEW diaper on you until you dirty that one too and I have
to start the vicious cycle all over again! "
" Buh Veh-GEEEEE!!!!!! " Kakarrotto looked on the verge to pained tears, " It HURRRRRTS!!! " he sobbed, pulling at
the diaper.
" I SAID _NO_!!! "
" I said no. " Vegeta flatly repeated, " If I said "no", then HOW did I end up back upstairs with you, your smelly,
stinky, sweaty kaka-diaper, kaka-tush cleaning fluid, and new diapers! "
" Cuz Vehdgee loves me and doesn't like seeing me in pain? " Kakarrotto offered in his native tongue, giggling as he
layed back on the guest bed.
Vegeta sighed, " You big baka. " he took a clean diaper out of the bag of special ones Bulma had invented for him,
" You are so lucky you're you, Kakarrotto. If it were anyone else on that bed in a dirty diaper right now I would've
destoryed them for merely existing. "
" Guba wahhh!!! " Kakarrotto squealed, flushing from what he percieved as a compliment.
" Heh-heh, right. " Vegeta sweatdropped, " Listen, like I said before. Changing YOUR diaper makes me feel very VERY
uncomfortable, so I'd appreciate it if you'd just cooperate with me so we can get this done as quickly and painlessly as
possible, oh-kay? "
Kakarrotto nodded sweetly.
" Uh-huh. " Vegeta said dryly, then ripped off the old diaper and nearly fainted from the stench, " AAAAUGH!!!
KAKARROTTO WHAT DID YOU EAT!!! IT SMELLS LIKE YOU JUST CRAPPED A COUNTRY OUT YOUR BEHIND!! "
" Whee!!! " Kakarrotto giggled, laying back down. Vegeta dropped the toxic-smelling diaper into the trash and
sprayed the larger saiyajin down with cleaning fluid and dumped baby-powder on him. Kakarrotto blinked and looked down at
himself, " Dena ponne wah? "
" Yes the box DOES say that and NO I am NOT going to RUB IT INTO YOUR BODY!!! " Vegeta snapped, " You're lucky I'm
mad enough right now to do this without fainting from what I'm doing! " he took a new diaper out and put it on Kakarrotto
inplace of the old one, " There, better? "
" Mmm-hmm! " Kakarrotto nodded happily, " Vehdgee mahke yanana bubu Kakarrotto! " he clasped his hands together.
" Yeah....sure... " Vegeta looked away before his face could turn bright red, " Need any, help getting down? "
" Hahaha! " Kakarrotto held his arms out as Vegeta helped him off the bed, " Aww, Vehdgee naba ju-ju Ouji!! "
" I'm 'acting like a real-live Ouji'. Yah, you're, umm, welcome, Kakay. " Vegeta turned a light reddish tint, then
watched as Kakarrotto happily waddled out of the room and into the hallway only to scream in fright. Vegeta bolted to
attention and ran out after him.
" KAKARROTTO-CHAN!!!! " he screeched to a halt to find Kakarrotto staring at his reflection in the mirror with a
look of pure fear on his face, " Ka--Kakarrotto? "
" WHO IS _THAT_ GUY!!! " Kakarrotto yelped, pointing at his reflection. Vegeta sweatdropped.
" Uh-oh. "
*****************************************************************************************************************************
3:10 AM 2/16/2003
END OF PART TWO!
Chuquita: (happily) Another chapter completed!
Vegeta: Something tells me the story's chibi Kakarrotto is going to need some psychological counciling.
Goku: (appears out of nowhere) OR just a lil love & logical explaination from VEGGIE! [hugs Veggie from behind]
Vegeta: (sweatrops) How did you get back so fast! (bolts to attention) AND WHERE'S CHIBI ME!
Chibi Veggie: [sitting infront of him on the desk; back in his regular training outfit w/no fake facial hair]
(sing-song) Here I am!
Vegeta: (to Son) (flatly) You taught him how to TELEPORT, didn't you?
Chibi Veggie: [teleports to random places around the room] This is FUN!!!
Goku: Hey, I got all the fake mustache and beard off him, didn't I little Veggie?
Chuquita: He's got a point Vedge.
Vegeta: Oh SHUT UP!
Chibi Goku: (eyes fly open)
[everyone else freezes in place]
Chibi Goku: *hip, hip hip, hip* (takes a deep breath) WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Chuquita: (bottom eyelid twitches) ...oww.
Vegeta: (ears in pain) AARG! MAKE HIM STOP!!
Goku: (frowns) Poor poor chibi me. [starts rubbing chibi Goku's belly]
Chibi Goku: (quiets down) (small smiles up at Son)
Goku: (warmly) Yeah, that's it. I understand you don't like having people say (imitation Veggie) "shut up", do you?
Vegeta: (sweatdrops)
Chuquita: (snickers)
Vegeta: (grumbles) You rubbed his stomach, big deal. _I_ could rub his stomach!
Goku: Ah, but you're not me and only I really know how I like to calm down myself.
Vegeta: (confused) ....huh? (cocks his head)
Goku: Awwwww [hugs Veggie] I luv it when little Veggie's head emptys itself on him!
Vegeta: (bright red) Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-hehhh... (shakes redness from his face) Hmm, [curiously rubs adult Son's belly]
Goku: (big content smile) Mmmmmmm~~~ (faints and falls down onto floor)
Chuquita: Wow....that was fast.
Vegeta: (in surprise) I think I may have just discovered the key to Kakarrotto's weakness, AND something I can bribe him
with in order to further my kaka-servant-maid plans! (big grin)
Goku: (sits up, woozy) Heeheehee, aww Veggie--
Vegeta: (rubs Son's belly in a circle)
Goku: (bright pink) (squeals) FWHEEEEE!!! (faints again; head smacks down onto floor)
Vegeta: (evil smirk) I'm onto something.
Chibi Veggie: (w/his face pressed against a window near the ceiling) IT'S SNOWING!!
Goku: (sits up like nothing happened) (excitedly) SNOWING!?
Chuquita: (grins) We're supposed to get up to 30 inches!
Goku: WOW, that's even taller than VEGGIE!
Vegeta: (sweatdrops) I am NOT under 30 inches tall! That would put me at less than 3 FEET!!
Goku: Chibi Veggie is less than 3 feet tall...I think. (blinks as if in deep thought)
Chuquita: I read in a doujinshi somewhere that Veggie was 150cm tall. (grins) I did some math and found out it put him at
about four foot nine!
Vegeta: (falls over) You're KIDDING!!!
Chuquita: Actually w/Veggie that short it puts everyone else's height a normal size. I always thought Goku was about a foot
& a half taller than you and that would make him 6'4.
Vegeta: (glares at her)
Chuquita: What! I'm 5'4, 4'9's a reasonable size for a guy who according to the actual anime is around 132 pounds!
Vegeta: (grumbles) Yeah well you don't have to rub it in.
Chuquita: It was a doujinshi parodying movie 7 (w/the androids 13, 14, & 15) and the shorter android did a check on Veggie
w/his eyepiece thing and a whole bunch of numbers came up. 150cm was the highest number on the charts.
Vegeta: (snorts) Well I blame Freezer! He probably put a drug in my body when I wasn't looking that stopped my height from
reaching its full potential because he was scared of the really big saiyajins...I SHOULD'VE BEEN 7 FEET TALL!! TALLER THAN
NAPPA!!! TALLER THAN MY FATHER TALLER THAN-- [shadow looms over him] (pupils get really small) (looks up to see Son staring
down at him w/big sparkily eyes) (squeaks out) --Kakarrotto.
Goku: (musing) My sweet little Veggie is not even a full five feet?
Vegeta: (nervously inches away from Son who tip-toes towards him) Uhhh, I, I, I, I, I, I, I---
Chuquita: Actually the offical number the calculator pumped out was 4.925. So I guess that makes him 4 feet, 9 inches,
25 umm, 25. (sweatdrops)
Goku: Oh VEGGIE! (grabs Veggie and hugs him tightly) You are even littler than I thought! I love you.
Vegeta: (lets out strangled yelp noise)
Chibi Veggie: (runs over to them) I wanna play in the snow!
Goku: (eyes widen even larger ;if possible)
Vegeta: (squeaks out) (to Chibi Veggie) Run...run while there's still time....
Goku: [looking down at Chibi Veggie] Would EXTRA little Veggie like to come play in the snow with ME?
Chibi Veggie: (excitedly) Uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh!!! (bounces up and down)
Goku: Wow.....THIS IS GONNA BE SO MUCH FUN!!! Playin in the snow just me and my Veggies!!
Chibi Veggie: (confused) I'm not 'your' Veggie. I don't even know you that well.
Vegeta: (flatly) Believe me, you will.
Goku: (to chibi Veggie) But we can make snowmen together and build an igloo and sled and make snow-angels and it'll be
so much fun with 2 Veggies along!
Chibi Veggie: Can we have a snowball fight?
Goku: Sure!
Chibi Veggie: I'M IN!!!
Goku: (holds Veggie tighter) And what about my ~*FAVORITE*~ lil 'one inch shy of 5ft' Veggie?
Vegeta: (groans) It doesn't really matter what I say, does it?
Goku: (sweetly) Nope!
Vegeta: (sighs) Fine, I'll go.
Goku: (cheers) YIPPEE!!! VEGGIE TIME FOR ME!! [picks up chibi Goku] AN CHIBI ME TOO!! [runs off]
Chuquita: Hey, where are you going?
Goku: TO GET MY VEGGIES AND CHIBI SELF IN THEIR WINTER CLOTHES!! WANNA COME?
Chuquita: (snickers) Why not, it should be entertaining. [walks towards him and looks out the window] Just make sure you
don't lose any of them out there.
Goku: [holds the Veggies tighter] (taking her seriously) Oh don't worry, Chu-sama, I promise I'll keep my eyes on my
Veggies and chibi self!
Chuquita: Heehee, I love the snow! (to audiance) To anyone else out there who's had their Monday and probably Tuesday
school days canceled because of this blizzard, have fun!
Goku: (happily) We'll see you in part 3! I'm gonna go have fun with my little snow-veggies!
Vegeta: (flushes red) "SNOW-veggies??"
E-mail: lac31685@aol.com
By: Chuquita
Quote of the Week: -from dbz manga 142 "The Risky Decision"
Goku: (boldly) We will bring peace to the future! [holds arm up]
Everyone: YEAH! [hold arms up]
Bulma: (sarcasm) Great, you've taken over the world now.
Chuey's Corner:
Vegeta: And that will be a very frightening day indeed.
Goku: (happily) My first order of business as ruler of the world would be to rename Canada, Chicken Pot Pie; America, Double
Quarter Pounder with Cheese Land, and everybody gets free fish on Thursdays! And we all get to wear fancy hats!
Vegeta: That's stupid.
Chuquita: What's stupid?
Vegeta: All three of them! [points to Son's list] Well, maybe except the hat thing, but the rest of it's a bunch of baka,
disorganized random ideas!
Chuquita: (sweatdrops) What do you need a fancy hat for? You can't fit one ontop of all that hair.
Goku: Maybe we could just push Veggie's hair down and then get him a hat. [presses Veggie's hair back and smiles] See! You
can buy Veggie-sized hats! (glances over at Veggie) Wow Veggie you look weird with your hair down.
Vegeta: (slightly annoyed) Do you mind taking your large kaka-hand off my head?
Goku: OH! Sorry little Veggie!
Chuquita: (smiles) Hey Son-kun, chibi you is sleeping!
Goku: (looks down at chibi Goku who Veggie's still holding) Awww!! Veggie's such a good mommy!
Vegeta: (grits his teeth) I'm not a mommy.
Goku: Yes you are, you're Ji-chan's mommy! (to his chibi self) (baby-talk) Isn't that right widdle me!
Chibi Goku: (snoring lightly) Z..z..z.....
[loud trumpeting noise is heard beneath them; Veggie gulps and quickly puts earmuffs on chibi Goku's head]
Chibi Veggie: (trying to make his voice sound deeper) Greetings and hello gentlepeasants and gentleladies for your King has
arrived! [wearing a costume similar to King Bejito's]
Goku: (giggles) Heeheehee, look Veggie, extra little Veggie's got more facial hair than you!
Vegeta: (notices the fake beard and mustache his chibi self has on) (sweatdrops) Take those off before you make a fool out of
you--me--ourselves!
Chibi Veggie: (proudly) The King of Bejito-sei cannot remove his beard and mustache for they are glued on with rubber cement
and it hurts very bad when you grab at them.
Goku: [tugs at beard anyway]
Chibi Veggie: Oww!!
Vegeta: WHAT DID YOU DO _THAT_ for!
Chibi Veggie: (whinces as he rubbes his 'beard') I wanted it to look authentic.
Vegeta: It looks stupid.
Goku: I think it looks cute!
Chuquita: You're just saying that cuz he's Veggie too!
Goku: ...yes.
Chuquita: (curious) Why did you dress up like your father, chibi Veggie?
Chibi Veggie: I was bored...
Chuquita: ... (blinks; confused) Oh.
Goku: Does it come off?
Chibi Veggie: I'm not sure.
Vegeta: (slaps himself on the forehead and groans) Ugh! Baka chibi!
Chibi Veggie: (tugs at his 'facial hair') How am I gonna get rid of it?
Chuquita: Try washing the, err, rubber cement off w/soap & water.
Goku: OR you could shave it off.
Vegeta: NO HE CAN'T, KAKARROTTO! HE'S 7 YEARS OLD! HOW'S HE GOING TO KNOW HOW TO--
Chibi Veggie: (eagerly) I WANNA SHAVE!
Goku: [hands him an electric razor] (sweetly) Have fun! And don't cut yourself!
Chibi Veggie: WHEEE!! [starts to run off]
Chuquita: HEY WAIT!!
Chibi Veggie: (pauses) Hm?
Chuquita: (nervous laugh) Umm, Veggie, out of curiousity, where'd you put the fireworks?
Chibi Veggie: (expression goes blank) Uhhh...I don't remember! (cheesy grin) Don't worry, we'll find out where I put them in
about an hour!
Goku: Ooh ooh ooh! Chibi Veggie guess who I am! [powers up enough so his hair stands up w/o turing yellow] [spins around and
stops to reveal he is now wearing a larger version of Veggie's training outfit]
Chibi Veggie: You're adult me!
Goku: VEGGIE WINS! [hands him a candy bar] Thank you for participating, please come again.
Vegeta: (angry) WHAT ABOUT ME!
Goku: [hands him a box] You get a copy of our home game! See! [opens box to reveal gameboard and little mini plastic candy
bar]
Vegeta: (sweatdrops) Why do I even bother.
Goku: Come extra little Veggie! I will free you from the confines of your rubber cement and false facial hair!
Chibi Veggie: YAY! [both run off]
Vegeta: (lamely) (to Chu) Well?
Chuquita: I dunno, you wanna say it?
Vegeta: (examining tiny plastic candy bar) Why not? (to audiance) Here's part 2!
Summary: After Veggie accidentally hits Goku too hard, causing 'Kakarrotto' to re-appear. However, Kakarrotto's last memory
was at the age of 2. Will Veggie be able to kaka-sit this 'big baby' until Bulma is able to develop a way to bring Goku back,
or will Goku be stuck in jumbo-sized diapers forever? And is Veggie willing to change them?
*****************************************************************************************************************************
" I HATE YOU OUJI!! " Chi-Chi screamed while being forced to wash dishes inside the resturant for being unable to pay
or win her bet. It had been several hours since Goku had gone to the 'bathroom', " I KNOW he's behind this SOMEHOW! There's
no other logical explanation why Goku would be in the bathroom for this long! " she exclaimed, " I bet that evil little
Ouji's doing HORRIBLE TERRIBLE things to my Go-chan in one of those stalls right now! " Chi-Chi shuddered at the thought,
then turned to the manager and smiled cheesily, " Umm, excuse me sir, may I use the bathroom for a moment please? "
The manager looked at her skeptically, " Only if you don't bail out like your 'acclaimed human-garbage-disposal'
did. "
" Haha, great! " she pulled off the rubber gloves she was using on the dishes and ran back into the main section of
the resturant. Chi-Chi sneaked towards the men's room and kicked the door open, " AH-HA!!! " she pointed accusingly, " I'VE
GOT YOU NOW YOU EVIL LYING CHEATING LITTLE CREEP!!! "
The sole occupant of the room, a slightly pump middleaged man washing his hands in the sink, stared at Chi-Chi in
fright and surprise. He nervously reached slowly towards the paper towels, quickly grabbed one, and dashed out of the
bathroom.
" Umm, goodbye then. " Chi-Chi sweatdropped, embarassed, " Heh-heh-heh.. " she then narrowed her eyes, " Stupid
Ouji. " she walked through the bathrooms, then noticed a newspaper on the floor and picked it up. Chi-Chi cried in disgust as
a rather loud, all-to-familiar smell entered her nostrils, " EEW! OUJI!!! " she dropped the paper, " He WAS here! " Chi-Chi
growled only to have her face suddenly go pale, " Oh my God, he WAS here. That means he really DID take my Go-chan! And I let
it happen because I let Goku go in there unsupervised!!! " she wailed, then grabbed the newspaper and started beating it
against the side of the stall, " I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU!!!! "
" *A-HEM* " a voice cleared its throat from behind her. Chi-Chi face-faulted and turned around to see the manager,
" Having, 'trouble' with the newspaper, Mrs. Son? "
" Uhhh... " Chi-Chi blinked, unable to think of something to say.
" You, do you you're in the wrong bathroom, don't you? "
" OOH! OF COURSE I KNOW I'M IN THE WRONG BATHROOM! I CAME IN HERE TO CHECK ON MY GO-CHAN WHO HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED BY AN
EVIL OUJI WHO HAS TRIED TO KIDNAP AND ENSLAVE MY HUSBAND A NUMBER OF TIMES AND IF I DON'T GET OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW HE'S
GOING TO SUCCEED AND I CAN'T ALLOW HIM TO SUCCEED!! " Chi-Chi exclaimed, grabbing the manager and shaking him by the collar,
" So you see you have to let me leave! I promise I'll come right back and Goku will help me with the dishes! I just have to
DESTROY THE OUJI FIRST!! "
" An "evil" ouji. " the man said skeptically.
" YES! Don't you believe oujis can be evil!!! " she snapped.
" What's he the ouji of? " the manager cocked an eyebrow.
" You wouldn't believe me if I told you. " Chi-Chi said flatly, " So-can-I-go? "
" Eh..alright. Grab your freeloading friend and get both your rears back here so you can pay me for all the money you
owe. " he snorted.
" HOORAY! " Chi-Chi cheered, dropping him to the floor, " I mean, sorry about that. " she laughed nervously as she
helped him back up, " I'll be right back! Trust me! " Chi-Chi gave him a thumbs-up, then dashed out of the resturant.
The manager sighed, " Yeah right, she said that about the food too. "
" La la la la la la la! " Bulma's mom, Mrs. Briefs sang to her self as she brought a plateful of cookies into the
living room and set them down on the table.
" *nna*nna*nna*nnah! " a knawing sound came from behind her. Bunny opened her eyes and peeked over the side of the
couch to see Kakarrotto chewing on the corner of the furniture. There were dozens of deep teeth-marks on the ripped couch.
" Why hello Goku, Bulma didn't tell me you were coming over. " she said pleasantly, closing her eyes again. The still
-diapered saiyajin looked up at her, his teeth in mid-bite of a piece of her couch. Kakarrotto blinked twice, then went back
to eating it. Bunny sweatdropped, " I left some cookies on the table if you're hungry. " she said.
" Nahbada wa! " Kakarrotto snapped at her.
" ... " Bunny blinked, " Umm, oh-kay then Goku. I'll be in the kitchen if you need anything. " Bulma's mother said,
then left.
Kakarrotto sniffed the air, then crawled over to the table with the cookies on it and licked his lips, " Nummy! "
" Alright! I'm ready! I can do this! " Vegeta said confidently as he stood infront of the mirror in his room wearing
a radiation suit, " BWAHAHA! Kakarrotto's not getting his jaws anywhere near me THIS time! " he laughed proudly, the suit
even stretching to keep his tail safe. With that he teleported down to the lab, " Hey Bulma do you have any muzzles? "
" Muzzle--WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?! " Bulma fell over at the suit and helmet the ouji had on.
" It's called bond-prevention safety, got a problem with that? " the ouji narrowed his eyes, " Now where do we keep
the animal muzzles? "
" Uh, over there. " Bulma pointed behind her.
" Perfect! " Vegeta grabbed one of the larger ones, " This will definately keep me my body kaka-bite free! It should
fit Kakarrotto, it looks big enough. "
" Why are you trying to put a muzzle on Goku? " Bulma sweatdropped.
" Kakarrotto 1.0. " he corrected her.
" *sigh*, Kakarrotto 1.0. "
" Bulma, remember me telling you before that I couldn't complete the saiyajin marriage ritual with you because I was
worried I'd accidentally kill you in the process? (Which is also why you're still only the partially-legal saiyajin oujo). "
" Yes. "
" Well there would need to be a slight blood-sharing between the two parties. If Kakarrotto were to accidentally
bite me due to his nonexistant teething disorder than by the time he got his memory back he could literally control me like
a brain-dead zombie-puppet at will. That and he'd be the oujo. AND I DON'T WANT KAKARROTTO TO BE THE OUJO!! " Vegeta waved
his arms in the air in a panic.
" If that's all it takes I could easily perform a blood transfusion on us. I mean, if that would prevent Goku from
accidentally becoming your 'oujo' in any way shape or form I wouldn't mind. " Bulma shrugged, " As long as you don't have any
strange alien diseases in your bloodstream I'm supposed to know about. "
" No as a matter of fact I happen to be 'disease'-free and....wait, what's a blood transfusion? " the ouji paused,
confused.
Bulma sighed, " It's like the end of your "mating" ritual, only without biting. "
Vegeta sweatdropped, " WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME ABOUT THIS BEFORE!!! "
" I had no idea that was the 'part' you cut out! " she exclaimed, " A blood transfusion is normally used to give
blood from one person to another who has been severely injured and lost a lot of their own blood; but I guess we could give
it a try anyway. "
" GREAT! You get working on that while I cover Kakarrotto's mouth with this muzzle so he doesn't accidentally bond
us. " Vegeta looked optimistic with a big grin on his face.
" You're also going to go buy "Kakarrotto" some toys to play with after that's done so he won't have to wear it that
long. " Bulma nodded.
" WHAT! " Vegeta gawked, " I CAN'T DO THAT! THAT'S AN INSULT TO MY PEASANT!! "
" So is the dog muzzle. "
" ... " Vegeta looked down at the muzzle, which looked like something one would use to contain a crazy person, " Hmm,
point. " he said, " It is decided then! I shall muzzle Kakarrotto version 1 and then leave to obtain some squeaky toys to
stuff in his mouth instead! "
" Good boy. " Bulma patted him on the head like the ouji was as pet. She snickered at Vegeta while he glared at her.
" Hmmph! " Vegeta snorted, leaving the lab by teleporting, " I don't need your help or advice on this. I can take
care of Kakarrotto perfectly well on my own!! "
" HOW THE HECK AM I GONNA DO THIS!!! " Vegeta shrieked while staring at the now-completely-mauled couch, " Kakarrotto
ripped it into PIECES....with his TEETH! " he ouji shivered, then looked down to see a small chunk of wood and picked it up,
" AND HE _ATE_ THE FOOTREST!! What kind of stupid idiot would eat a FOOTREST! "
" Baga wa! "
Vegeta looked up to see Kakarrotto smiling at him, still crouched down on his hind legs, his arms dangling infront of
him.
" Glad to know even without the amnesia you still manage to retain the same common sense, Kakarrot. " Vegeta said
dryly, looking back down at the wood chunk in his hand.
" Coo-kee! " Kakarrotto held out a single cookie which remained of the dozens of cookies the larger saiyajin had also
'slaughtered' with his mouth. There was chocolate smeared all over his face.
" Yes Kakarrotto, that's a cookie. " the ouji sweatdropped.
" Hoblume canna jo pu cookie no Vehdgee! " Kakarrotto grinned, handing the cookie to Vegeta.
" Oh...for me. You, shouldn't have. " Vegeta laughed nervously, then pulled something out from behind him, " And look
what I've got for YOU, Kakay. " he held up the muzzle.
" NUMM'UMS! " Kakarrotto squealed, then took in deep breath and sucked the muzzle straight into his mouth like a
super-powerful vaccum cleaner. Vegeta stared blankly as Kakarrotto easily chewed the muzzle up, then burped dozens of little
confetti-like pieces of the muzzle into the air.
" ... " Vegeta blinked, then inched slowly back about a foot away from Kakarrotto, " Heh-heh-heh. " he chuckled,
" Oh-kay. You know what Kakarrotto, let's just forget about that part, huh. "
" Moomoo dawe? " the larger saiyajin licked his lips.
" No, I don't have anymore chewy treats for you. " Vegeta said flatly in his native language, then sighed in english,
" I don't get it! That thing isn't even edible and he chews it up like a piece of gum! " he groaned. An idea smacked the ouji
over the head and he grinned with delight, " GUM! THAT'S IT!! " Vegeta took off the radiation suit he had ontop of his
training outfit, then pulled a pack of gum out of his training pants pocket, " Kakarrotto-chan would you like some gum? " he
asked pleasantly in saiyago.
" Wopa "gum"? " Kakarrotto grinned cluelessly, cocking his head to the side.
" Oh, gum is a very yummy treat little peasants like you can chew to make their gums feel better, hence the name of
this fine, delicious product. " Vegeta said with a cheesy smile, ::I sound like an infomercial:: he mentally sweatdropped.
" YAY! " Kakarrotto squealed, grabbing the entire pack including the wrappers and chewed them up into a wad of gum
large enough to fit in nearly his entire mouth.
" That'll keep him busy and bite-free for the next couple hours. " Vegeta said happily, " I'm glad I thought of it! "
he boasted to himself, then looked back over at Kakarrotto, " SO! Kakarrotto now that you have some gum, how would you like
to come with "Vehdgee" to the toystore to buy some wonderful things for you to play with, eh? " he asked.
The larger saiyajin's eyes widened into two big black sparkily blobs, " Oh Vehdgee~~ " Kakarrotto mused in awe. The
ouji took another step backwards, " Aimine ne ko, pami ou-jeee! "
" Heh-heh, yes, I love you too, very much. " Vegeta gulped while he watched Kakarrotto chew through the huge wad of
gum in his mouth like butter, " Now, why don't you come over here and Veggie will drive you to the toystore and buy you some
nice kaka-presents! Then we can play together with them! " he smirked.
" Maba waaa? "
" Yes, realllly. " the ouji rubbed his hands together.
" WOO-HOO! " Kakarrotto cheered, " Toy-shopping with Vehdgee! " he squealed in saiyago.
" Heh-heh. " Vegeta laughed nervously as he watched Kakarrotto waddle wobbily towards the front door, " I'm starting
to think I'm being punished for something. "
" Well, I've narrowed it down to three things. The time Nappa and I blew up planet Arelia right after "saving" those
bug people who acclaimed us as heroes til I blasted them into oblivion, the time I tried to wish for immortality on planet
Namek, and this entire Kaka-servant-maid thing I've been attempting for the past 'umpteenth years. " Vegeta rattled off to
himself as he unstrapped Kakarrotto from a very large baby car-seat Bulma had built for them, " Wake up little non-amnesiac
peasant. We've made it to Toys'r'we. "
" Toyyyyyys? " Kakarrotto's eyes flew wide open and he grinned with excitement, " TOYS TOYS TOYS TOYS FOR KAK'RROTTO!
That is me! " he pointed to himself. The ouji had been teaching the larger saiyajin a very small amount of english on the way
up. Enough to have a basic conversation, but still much too little for anyone besides Vegeta himself to be able to
communicate with him.
" It's oh-kay if you speak saiyago in the store, Kakarrotto. They'll probably think we're just spanish or something."
Vegeta shrugged, " Besides I don't want you to sound completely stupid when you talk to me in there. " he helped the toddler-
-brained saiyajin out of the car and closed the door, " Just be quiet and pleasant so we can both get through this as
painlessly as possib--- "
" --WOW LOOK AT ALL THE PRETTY TOYS!!! " Kakarrotto squealed in ecstasy as he bound about the inside of the Toys'r'we
store, " Pretty pretty toys all for Kak'rrotto! "
" Ohhhh... " Vegeta groaned, hanging his head in embarassment, " I really wish he hadn't swallowed that gum! "
" All for me, Vehdgee? " the larger saiyajin clasped his hands together.
" Uhhh, yeahh, here. " Vegeta pulled a nearby pacifier out of a box on the shelf to his right, then shoved the
squishy end in Kakarrotto's mouth, " No talking, alright? " he said, slightly annoyed.
" Mmmph mmph mmefmpheee! " Kakarrotto muffledly answered, then quickly sped off deep into the toystore.
" GAH!! KAKARROTTO COME BACK HERE!! IF YOU TRIP AND FALL AGAIN I'M _NOT_ GOING TO RE-RE-TEACH YOU HOW TO WALK THIS
TIME!!! " Vegeta yelled, racing after him only to screech to a halt infront of many many eisles, " ...uh-oh. "
" Lalalalalalala. " Kakarrotto sang through his pacifier as he waddled through an eisle full of greeting cards only
to notice a bright shining light at the end of the eisle that led to another one. He slowed down his waddle and froze in
wonder at the seemingly glowing sign above the next eisle that read "stuffed toys", " Its boodypull... " he mumbled as drool
dribbled down the side of his mouth, " WHEE!!! " the saiyajin squealed, dashing into the stuffed toyland.
" Kakarrotto. KAKARROTTO! " Vegeta called out, wandering through a nearby eisle, " Now where could that baka be! "
" Umm, are you looking for someone sir? " a young man wearing a toys'r'we worker uniform asked.
Vegeta sent him a death-glare.
" Cu--cuz we can pa-page your friend over the--the--in--intercom if yo--you'd like? " the worker gulped nervously.
" Where is this "intercom"? "
The worker pointed to a box stationed on a nearby eisle. Vegeta smirked and walked over to it, then picked up what
looked like a walkie-talkie on a cord. He cleared this throat, then screamed into the reciever, " KAKARROTTO WHERE ARE YOU!!"
Everyone in the store wailed in pain from the loudness of the ouji's voice. Vegeta smiled as several people fell over
holding their ears in pain.
" Heh-heh, stupid humans. KAKARROTTOOOOOO!!! " he screamed louder.
Kakarrotto glanced up from the stuffed bunny he was feeding a plastic bottle to, then turned his attention back to it
3 seconds later.
Vegeta sighed, " So much for THAT. " he hung up the walkie-talkie, " Now if I were 2 years old and alone in a
toystore where would I go? "
" *FWOOM!* " two nearby eisles collapsed inward only to hold each other up in a pyramid-like shape while the sound
of hundreds of squeaky plush toys tumbled to the ground. Vegeta sweatdropped, " I'm not sure I want to know. " he teleported
over to the eisle and yelped to see Kakarrotto sitting on the floor underneath the 'pyramid' with dozens of plush toys in his
arms and a big grin on his face.
" My babies Vehdgee! " he said happily, cuddling the plush toys close to him. Vegeta narrowed his eyes, " I want them
Vehdgee can I peas! "
Vegeta groaned, " Ugh... "
" *suck*suck*suck*. " Kakarrotto quietly and curiously sucked on his pacifier as Vegeta pulled him along. The ouji
had purchaced a baby-harnass and since attached it around Kakarrotto making it look more like the larger saiyajin was wearing
a parachuteless parachute x-shaped strap around his body. There was a leash-like device that lead from the end of the rope
Vegeta was holding to the middle of the x; namely Kakarrotto's stomach-region. The ouji's other hand was pulling a cart full
of about 10 or 12 of the stuffed toys Kakarrotto had found in the large pile.
" This is DEFINATELY for that Arelian thing. " Vegeta muttered as he flipped through various baby-bibs; all
absurdedly too small to fit around Kakarrotto's neck, " I blew up their planet seconds before its king and queen were about
to 'embrace' each other and now I'm being punished by having all this free kaka-time and a brain-dead Kakarrotto so I can't
even attempt to enservantize him. " he sighed.
" You should try this brand. "
Vegeta blinked, then looked over to his right to see a smiling woman carrying a baby boy. She pointed to the blue bib
versus the red one Vegeta was holding.
" It lasts longer, especially for fussy babies. " she smiled.
" Err, thanks. " the ouji sweatdropped.
" Are you shopping for your first? "
" Well, this IS definately the first time something like this has happened to me. " Vegeta looked upward, half in
grief and embarassment.
" Oh I remember when I had MY first child. " the woman mused. Vegeta rolled his eyes and ignored her.
" Mommy mommy! Look at the big baby! " a little girl squealed several feet away. Vegeta froze and looked out of the
corner of his eye to see the small, pig-tailed girl poking Kakarrotto in the arm.
The woman from before glanced over at her daughter and let out a noise that sounded somewhere inbetween fright and
disgust, " AHH! Su-chan get away from that man! " she grabbed the girl's arm and pulled her away while Kakarrotto continued
to stare at them, sucking on his pacifier, " Honestly! What kind of weirdo gets his sick pleasures out of walking around a
toystore in a diaper. "
" KAKARROTTO IS NOT A WEIRDO!!! " Vegeta snapped at her, " HE HAS AMNESIA!!! I mean, EX-AMNESIA!!! "
The woman stood agast, " You KNOW that thing! "
A vein bulged angrily on Vegeta's forehead, " HOW DARE YOU CALL HIM A THIIIIIING!!! KAKARROTTO IS MY PEASANT AND HE
JUST LOST A HUGE CHUNK OF HIS MEMORY! I'M TRYING TO KEEP HIM HEALTHY TILL HE GETS IT BACK AND IF _ANYONE_ IS GETTING 'SICK
PLEASURES' FROM THIS IT'S WHATEVER FORCE UP THERE DECIDED TO DO THIS TO ME!!! " he raged, protectively gripping tighter on
the leash that led to Kakarrotto.
" Listen mister, I don't care HOW you and your 'peasant' get your kicks together but go do it some other department
store! " the slightly nerve-shaken woman snorted, " Honestly, what a couple of pervs. "
" I AM NOT A PERV!!! " Vegeta screamed, " ...WHATEVER THAT IS!!! "
" Beaten bananas, hmm. " the ouji said, now in the baby-food eisle with Kakarrotto, who was happily sniffing every
can of food across from where Vegeta was standing. The ouji opened the small can and dunked his finger inside, then tasted
it, " Bleh! That doesn't taste like bananas at all? What is this, some kind of condiment? " he held the can up only to have
his eyes bulge at the words 'baby food', " AAUGH!! _THIS_ is what HUMANS feed their young?! " Vegeta gawked, " I gummed
porkchops before I was 1! And these cans are so small I'd have to buy the whole eisle just to have a decent meal of it! "
" Mmmmmm! " Kakarrotto sighed as he sniffed a heavenly-smelling scent coming from another little can across the way.
" What's so "mmm" to you? " Vegeta set the still-opened can of 'beaten bananas' down on the counter and walked over
to the other side of the eisle.
" Wahhh!! " Kakarrotto opened his mouth and pointed upward at the can. Vegeta looked at the top of the eisle and felt
something short-circut in his brain as he read the sign.
" Vegetables. " the ouji read slowly with a blank look on his face. Then curiously held up his fingers and pointed
one out after each syllable, " Ve ge ta bles. That's....really strange. " he cocked an eyebrow, then grabbed several jars
and read the names on each one. The very-familiar-looking words suddenly slapped him across the back of the head, " Aah!
The--these are all saiyajin names. I mean, they LOOK like saiyajin names, they're just all spelled wrong. " Vegeta nervously
set a small jar reading 'raddishes' on the counter, " This is creepy. "
" Vehdgee! " Kakarrotto finally reached the can he had been sniffing and held it up, " Kakarrotto! " he grinned.
" Uh... " Vegeta took the can and read it, " Carrot. " he blinked, then opened the can to reveal a mushed up orange
goo, " Oh...it looks just like your gi.... " Vegeta turned a pale green.
" Vehdgee, if the food in the cans are named after saiyajins does that mean they're saiyajins that've been all mushed
up and put into jars for people to eat? " Kakarrotto asked in saiyago.
" N--no Kakarrotto, of course not. Why would anyone want to do that. " Vegeta laughed nervously.
" Cuz we're really strong? "
" ... " the ouji half-whimpered at the can in his hand, then stuck his finger in and ate some.
" VEHDGEE!! " Kakarrotto yelped, " That could've been my brother! Or my cousin! Or somebody else we know! " he gawked
in his native language.
" Mmmmmm... " the little ouji took his finger out of his mouth, " Not bad. " he happily swallowed the rest of it by
chucking the insides of the can into his mouth, " Pretty good, actually. "
Kakarrotto's eyes bulged out of his head.
" Calm down, Kakarrotto. This isn't made from saiyajin! It would taste like meat if it was. " he shrugged it off.
Kakarrotto looked partially relieved, " Besides, except for you and I we're all exti--- " Vegeta trailed off when he noticed
the big-eyed stare the younger saiyajin was giving him, " --rordinary warriors and we would have defeated whoever tried to
make us into a mushy food for toothless humans. "
Kakarrotto smiled up at the ouji proudly.
" Heh-heh-heh, yeah. " Vegeta laughed nervously. He quickly grabbed several more little cans of mushed carrots,
" Come on Kakarrotto, let's get out of here; I'll buy you some REAL food at the meat deli across the way. "
" Honobo wa? " Kakarrotto pointed at the mushed carrots, confused.
" So I like them! Big deal! " Vegeta exclaimed, his cheeks flushing a light red, " It's not like Kakarrotto 2 is
gonna know about it anyway! "
Kakarrotto stuck his finger in the near-empty mushed carrots can Vegeta had eaten from and tasted it, " BLEH! " he
stuck out his tongue with a repulsed look on his face, then happily grabbed another baby-food can labled 'mixed veggies' and
waddled after Vegeta and the cart.
" Hello human, I would like to purchase these baby-products. " Vegeta said as he placed the toys and baby-food on
the counter. The pile towered a good 3 feet. The girl behind the counter sweatdropped and peered out from behind it to see
Kakarrotto sitting there stucking his pacifer in a baby-harnass and diaper next to the impatient ouji. She laughed lightly.
" You're--you're kidding right? "
" ... " Vegeta sighed, " I wish I was. "
" Well, oh-kay then. " she started adding his items up, " That'll be $100.38. "
" Whoa... " the ouji muttered, then smirked, " Good thing I have Bulma's credit card! " he grinned at the plastic,
then handed it to her.
The girl bagged the items and handed them along with a recipt to the ouji, " Have a good day sir. "
" HA! " Vegeta laughed mockingly, then pulled on Kakarrotto's leash, " Come on Kakarrotto. "
" I wub u Vehdgee! " the larger saiyajin squealed. Vegeta's face flushed bright red.
" Heh-heh, right. " Vegeta made his way to the car and put everything in the trunk, then opened the backseat door,
" Alright Kakarrotto, hop in. " he looked down at the larger saiyajin, who waddled around to the front passanger's seat and
sat down.
" I wub Vehdgee! " Kakarrotto chirped happily. Vegeta sweatdropped.
" Well if you 'wub' Veggie so much then you'll get in the kiddie seat. " the ouji folded his arms.
" No. " Kakarrotto giggled.
" WHAT DO YOU MEAN "no, heeheehee" I CAN'T DRIVE WITH YOU UP HERE, KAKARROTTO! "
" Smoochie! " Kakarrotto held both his arms out.
Vegeta almost fell over, " What..did...you...say...? " a small vein bulged on his forehead.
" Smoochie for Kakay! Then listen to Vehdgee! " the larger saiyajin grinned widely.
" WHAT?! You never asked for anything like that before! " the ouji snapped, then froze, " Hey...waitaminute. If YOU
were Kakarrotto 2's subconsious and I've never called YOU inparticular "Kakay" before than that must mean since you were
bumped to the surface that Kakarrotto 2's still in existance and he is working YOUR subconsious the way YOU worked HIS! "
Vegeta said, proud of himself for figuring it out, " OH KAKAY YOU'RE STILL ALIVE AFTER ALL!! " he sobbed happily, hugging
the larger saiyajin, " I'm so happy!! I really thought I had lost you forever and I promise I'll never kick you in the
stomach again! "
" Smoochie now? " the saiyajin said eagerly.
The ouji sweatdropped, " Ugh, fine. " he cringed in disgust, then pecked the larger saiyajin on the cheek and spat
several times at the ground, sickened, " Now get in your carseat! "
" YAY! " Kakarrotto held his arms up as Vegeta strapped him in the baby-seat, " VEHDGEE'S THE BEST KISSER EVER!!! "
the large saiyajin shouted happily while several people walked by, snickering at the little ouji. Vegeta's face flushed,
embarassed; even though his back was to the passersby. He glared at the blissfully oblivious look on Kakarrotto's face, then
grumbled and got in the driver's seat.
" If this is some sort of revenge, Kakarrotto, it's NOT WORKING! " Vegeta snapped, starting the car.
" Wa kno. " the larger saiyajin said in a sing-song voice as the car drove off. He pulled the little can of 'mixed
veggies' out from inside his diaper and opened the can, then tasted some, " Neh! " Kakarrotto stuck his tongue out and made
a disgusted face. He stared blankly at the back of Vegeta's driver's seat and grinned. He mushed some of the mixed veggies
between his fingers and flicked them at the ouji's head.
" Oww! " Vegeta swatted whatever just hit him, then grumbled and went back to driving.
" Heeheeheeheehee! " Kakarrotto giggled, pulling out a whole handful of mixed vegetables and forming half a dozen
little balls in the palm of his hand and flicked them one by one at the back of Vegeta's head. The smaller saiyajin twitching
in annoyance everytime he was pelted with one of the baby-food balls.
" KAKA-RROTTO!! " Vegeta whipped around at the stop-light with a look of pure rage on his face. The larger saiyajin
only tilted his head in confusion. A happy smile on his face. Vegeta groaned, " Kakarrotto, did you do that? "
" Nuhba wa. " Kakarrotto shrugged, grinning stupidly. The ouji grunted, then turned around and sighed only to yelp as
another piece of food landed on his head.
" ERRRRRR... " he turned around and snarled at the larger saiyajin with his hands shaking in anger, " I swear if you
weren't in Kakarrotto version 2's body right now I would rip your arms off!...but you're are, so instead of screaming my
brains out and pouring every second of my attention onto you I'm going to punish you by doing something that I know for a
fact doesn't make little Kakays very happy. I'm going to completely ignore you. " Vegeta smirked, " Have fun all alone back
there Kaka-chan. " he turned his attention back to the wheel just as the light turned green.
" Vehdgee? " Kakarrotto squeaked out curiously.
" ... "
" Vehdgee, nobu patona. " the larger saiyajin said in a pouty voice, then picked up some of the mixed veggies mush
and threw it at Vegeta's head only to have the ouji not even move his hand to swat it away. Kakarrotto picked up a bigger
chunk and heaved it at Vegeta, " VEHDGEE NOBU PATONA!!! " Kakarrotto sniffled, his eyes beginning to water.
" Hmm, that's strange, for a second there I could've SWORN I heard something. " Vegeta said mockingly, keeping his
eyes focused on the road, " Oh well, I guess it was nothing important. "
" WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! VEHDGEE NO LOVES ME ANYMORE!!"
Kakarrotto wailed, tears flying down his cheeks.
" No-Kakay-that's-not-true!!! " Vegeta yelped, snapping to attention and turning around just intime to see Kakarrotto
wailing at the top of his lungs, still in the diaper which served as a healthy reminder of the saiyajin's mental state.
Vegeta put the capsule car on autopilot and hopped into the backseat, " Kakay don't cry. " he said sadly, sitting
down next to him, " You're a wonderful peasant; infact, the best peasant I've ever had! You know Vehdgee loves you, right? "
" Reallleee? " Kakarrotto stared over at him w/big sparkily eyes.
" Heh-heh-heh-heh, yeah, really. " the ouji's cheeks turned a light red.
" OH VEHDGEE!! " Kakarrotto lundged forward and hugged Vegeta tightly, flopping the ouji back-down on the backseat,
" Kakay paana-aaai, Vehdgee! " he sniffled.
" Uh, heh-heh, heh-heh, yeah. " Vegeta laughed nervously while being pressed down upon the couch. Kakarrotto grinned
and opened his mouth to expose what his mind imagined were gums and bent down to nibble on Vegeta's tail until he stopped
suddenly as he felt something just deposit itself in his pants.
" Uh-oh. "
" Uh-oh? Uh-oh WHAT?? _WHAT_ is "uh-oh"?! "
" Ahh, so THIS is uh-oh. " Vegeta said sarcastically while he pinched his nose, now sitting upright again and across
the backseat couch from Kakarrotto, " You could've warned me if you were about to take a dump, Kakarrotto. " the ouji
grumbled. Kakarrotto, meanwhile, had a very pleasant look on his face from the fact that he actually had just sent his own
breakfast down south for the winter.
" Hahaha! Happy! " Kakarrotto chirped.
" Yeah I bet you are. " Vegeta cringed in disgust, " You're lucky this car has an autopilot or I wouldn't have come
back here at all! " he turned to looked out the window. Kakarrotto grinned at the smaller saiyajin's tail twitching in the
air and reached over to grab it. He stuck the end of the ouji's monkey-like tail in his mouth and started chewing lightly to
soothe his supposed hurting gums. Kakarrotto started to bite down harder and in turn sent a wave of pain through Vegeta's
tail and into his body.
" AAUGGH!! " he screamed in shock, then turned the the larger saiyajin who still had the smaller one's tail in his
mouth and turned a pale green, " KAKARROTTO LET GO OF THAT!!! LET GO LET GO LET GO!!! " Vegeta pulled at the other end of his
tail, " YOU DON'T PUT OTHER PEOPLE'S LIMBS IN YOUR MOUTH, IDIOT!!! NO NO NOOOO-- "
" --OOOOOOOOOUJI!!!! "
Vegeta froze and poked his head out the window to see Chi-Chi about 2 miles behind them running as fast as she could,
" Oh crap!! It's Onna!! " he gulped. Vegeta quickly grabbed a blanket off the top of the backseat and covered Kakarrotto with
it, " Kaka-chan, I want you to stay still; don't move, don't budge, don't talk, but don't forget to breathe, alright? "
" Mmmm~~ *suck-suck*. " Kakarrotto continued to gum the tip of the ouji's tail.
A light blush line appeared over Vegeta's nose, " GIVE...ME...THAT!! " he yanked his tail free only to find the tip
was completely soaked in drool, " Eew... " the ouji quickly checked for any bite marks and sighed with relief to see none of
the many teeth indents in his tail had breached the skin, " You, don't, EAT ME! " Vegeta snapped, then completely covered
Kakarrotto, who started to sniff Vegeta's boot and began to chew on that, unknowingly to the prince.
" OUJI!! " Chi-Chi finally caught up the car, running beside it, " ALRIGHT YOU LITTLE DEMON OUJI! WHERE'D YOU PUT
GOKU!! "
" Who? " Vegeta said casually, smirking.
" You know who I'm talking about. " she said in a dangerous tone, " WHERE IS HE!!! "
" I thought you were taking Kakarrotto to a resturant for food and fun. " Vegeta mocked, " Or did Kakay get bored and
ditch you with the bill because you're a horrible dinner host? "
" It was for BREAKFAST, you moron. "
" ...oh. " Vegeta blinked, " Anyway, wherever Kakay is I'm sure he's happier than being all alone with YOU
somewhere. " the ouji snickered.
" I wouldn't be too sure of that. " Chi-Chi narrowed her eyes. She looked inside the car and cursed when she didn't
see anyone else inside with Vegeta. Chi-Chi's eyes suddenly bugged out as she sniffed the air, " Eew, what's THAT? "
Vegeta's face flushed. Kakarrotto had just dropped another load of waste into his diaper.
" Nothing. " Vegeta said shortly.
" It smells HORRIBLE in here! " Chi-Chi gagged, then noticed a little can on the backseat and picked it up.
" HEY YOU CAN'T TAKE THAT ONNA! THAT'S PRIVATE PROPERTY! I CAN HAVE YOU SUED AND THROWN IN THE DUNGEON FOR THAT!!! "
Vegeta screamed.
" West City doesn't HAVE a dungeon, Ouji. It has a jail. "
" THEN I'LL HAVE THEM THROW YOU IN THERE THEN! "
" --is this a jar of BABY food? "
" ... " the ouji froze and slunk back in his seat unassumingly.
" 'Mushed Carrots'? " Chi-Chi cocked an eyebrow at the near-fully-eaten little can. Kakarrotto reached his arm out
and quickly pulled his own can of 'mixed veggies' off the backseat and under the blanket with them, " Just when I thought you
couldn't get any sicker. " she said flatly, then sighed.
" Give it back and go away. " Vegeta snorted bluntly.
" HA! And let you get anymore sick kicks out of anything with the word 'carrot' in it, I don't think so Ouji. " she
shook her head.
" GIVE 'IM BACK!! " Kakarrotto shouted from underneath the blanket.
Vegeta gulped and kicked his foot under the blanket, lightly smacking Kakarrotto on the cheek.
" What was that. " Chi-Chi glared.
" Radio. " Vegeta said cooly, ::I can't let Onna take Kakarrotto back to that kaka-shack like THIS. She doesn't know
how to care for a baby saiyajin! Kakarrotto 1's brain is highly impressionable right now and VERY easily manipulatable. I'm
NOT going to let Onna turn him and Kakarrotto 2's subconsious into some 'ouji-hating' maniac!::
" The radio isn't on, Vegeta. " Chi-Chi smirked, " You have my Go-chan in there with you right now, don't you? "
" Ha, Onna if I had Kakarrotto-chan in here with me I think I'd let you know by now. " Vegeta folded his arms while
Kakarrotto went back to chewing on the ouji's boot. He had found a concentrated space over the middle of Vegeta's boot that
would surely rip for his teeth if he gummed it long enough. Of course the fact that the front half of the boot was inside his
mouth made the task slightly harder due to Kakarrotto could easily choke on how deep in his mouth the 'saved' portion of the
boot was. He smiled happily; whatever the boot was made out of sure made his aching 'gums' feel better to chew upon.
" Hn.. " Chi-Chi bit her lip, " You WOULD have made it known already if Go-chan was trapped in that smelly,
Ouji-mobile of yours. "
" Mmm~~~ " a pleased sound came from under the blanket next to Vegeta, who shifted uneasily at the noise.
" GOKU!!! " Chi-Chi yelled, " SON GOKU IF YOU'RE UNDER THAT CHEAP OUJI-STINKING SHEET THEN YOU GET OUT OF THIS CAR
RIGHT NOW!!! GO--KU!!! "
::Thank God this one only answers to 'Kakarrotto'.:: Vegeta mentally sighed with relief, then let out a strangled
yelp of a noise as he distinctly felt teeth gracing the top and bottom of his right foot. He quickly backed up and tried to
pull his foot out of his boot before the teeth could dig through his flesh, ::KUSO!! HE'S GOING TO BOND US!!:: the ouji
panicked, a look of horror written all over his face, " KAKARROTTO LET GO OF MY FOOT!!! " Vegeta wailed, kicking his foot up
and down and accidentally shoving the blanket off Kakarrotto's head, " I WANT YOU TO DISLODGE YOUR MOUTH FROM MY BOOT RIGHT
NOW! But slowly as to not rip a large chunk out of my foot causing my blood and your very large amount of kaka-drool to
interact with each other. "
" Rrrr.... " the larger saiyajin whine, " Boot goooooood. " he pouted, digging his teeth in to the point where they
layed ontop of the smaller saiyajin's foot.
" Yes, boot-good. I-understand-now. Veggie-understands-Kaka-chan-perfectly, hahahahahaha. " Vegeta said quickly,
nervous sweat pooring down his face, ::Dear God I might have to cut off my foot before it infects the rest of my body...I
DON'T WANT TO CUT OFF MY FOOT!!:: " Ka-ka-ka-ka, Kakarrotto, how about this. You take your mouth off my boot. I take my
boot off my foot. I give the boot to you WITHOUT MY FOOT INSIDE IT, and then you can chew ONLY my boot until it is nothing
more than a mere wad off the items that people use to create boots with. "
" ... " Kakarrotto blinked, then only dug even closer into the boot with a curious look on his face.
" OH KAMI!!! " Vegeta wailed, squinting his eyes shut and covering them with his hands, " DON'T LET HIM BREAK THE
FLESH!!! "
" Goku's, trying to EAT you, Ouji? " Chi-Chi looked theroughly confused. She smiled surprisingly, " He wants to eat
you! That's great! If he wants to eat you that means my Go-chan doesn't care whether your stinky Ouji carcass lives or
dies! " she chucked the mashed carrots over her shoulder and sweatdropped to hear a loud screeching sound from behind her.
" You just caused a 5-car pile-up. " Vegeta said dryly.
" But that's not important! " Chi-Chi perked up, then stuck her head through the window, " Say Goku, if you want to
rip the Ouji's body apart into pieces and devour it like a large plate of roast beef then why don't we take him back home
and I'll roast him to a crisp. We'll cut off his head and tail, cover him in barbaque sauce, and you can eat him! Why I'll
even do a good deed and feed whatever you don't eat to the woodland creatures that live outside our home. "
" ... " Vegeta started at her, shocked and disturbed, " And you call ME sick! " he sweatdropped.
" Hey, if it gets rid of you I'm all for it, you evil little monster. " Chi-Chi muttered, sending a death-glare at
him, " So, Goku! What do you think? " she said sweetly to the larger saiyajin.
" Nupaa bo gawa! " Goku let go of the boot to yell in a frightened tone. Vegeta quickly freed his foot and lept back
to the driver's seat, " Vehdgee! Kamake rru wehna! " he cried, starting at the ouji and pointing at Chi-Chi.
" What the heck are you--*GASP*--YOU'RE SPEAKING IN _OUJI_ AREN'T YOU, GOKU! " Chi-Chi gawked, then growled, " AND
WHY ARE YOU WEARING A DIAPER!! "
Vegeta slammed on the gas pedal, sending them flying down the road. Kakarrotto tumbled a bit on the backseat. Chi-Chi
stared at them in disbelief, then ran off in their direction.
" AND SINCE _WHEN_ DOES THE OUJI HAVE _BANGS_!!!! "
" *whew*! I think we're safe now. " Vegeta wiped the sweat off his brow as he sat still in the car with Kakarrotto.
The two saiyajin were in one of Capsule Corp's garages and the ouji had just closed the garage door on them, " Kakarrotto,
if Onna had taken you home in this she'd easily learn of your amnesia and use it to her advantage to train you to hate and
kill me! " he said in saiyago, then shuddered at the thought.
" But I don't kill Vehdgee. I love Vehdgee! " Kakarrotto smiled at him.
Vegeta looked down at his bootless foot, " Right... " he said sarcastically, getting out of the car. He walked
around to the backseat and opened the door, " You oh-kay in there Kakarrotto? "
" Vehdgee I saved 'um! " Kakarrotto grinned.
" Saved WHAT?! "
Kakarrotto pulled the can off 'mixed veggies' out from under the blanket, " Ta-da! " he patted the can, " That loud
lady won't take MY food! "
" Well Kakarrotto, that 'loud lady' is a very bad person. She might try again. After all, Onna's been plotting to
kill your 'sweet widdle Vehdgee' for a long long time now. " he smirked.
A look of worry covered Kakarrotto's face, " Loud lady wansa make Vehdgee's body shut off? "
" Yes, you might say that. And her name is Onna. "
" Onna. " Kakarrotto repeated, " Onna's a bad person! " he sniffled.
" Of COURSE she is! Why, Onna's the one who was ready to slice my head off and fry me in a deep fat frier while you
were busy, umm, " he looked back down at his naked foot.
" --chewing on Vehdgee's shoe? " Kakarrotto offered.
" *fake-sniffle* Hai, Kakay-chan!! " Vegeta got into the backseat and sat down next to him, " It's so terrible! Onna
tries to kill me night and day! Onna hates us saiyajin. She just doesn't understand how sweet and wonderful our species'
really is! " he overdramatically latched onto the larger saiyajin's arm.
" Like Freezer? " Kakarrotto blinked.
The little ouji nodded sadly, " Uh-huh. "
" Vehdgee that's HORRIBLE! " Kakarrotto sniffled, " You are so nice to me. You buy me toys and food and yummies and
nice clothes to wear and a warm room to sleep in and, Vehdgee if Onna is a bad person like Freezer let's have the other
saiyajins help us kill her. "
" ... " Vegeta blinked, " KILL?!!...oh yeah, your natural saiyajin urge to needlessly destory all that you find a
threat to your life is active again since your original personality is back. " he nodded, " However, I do not plan to
"kill" Onna. Not physically anyway. Psychologically, however, is a completely different story. " Vegeta rubbed his hands
together menacingly, " But for now let's just ignore her existance till she rears her ugly face again, huh? "
" YAY!! " Kakarrotto cheered, " Vehdgee is brave! "
" That I am. " Vegeta said boastfully as he picked the larger saiyajin up and teleported him to the living-room
couch. He then teleported away and back into the room carrying the bags from the trunk and set them down, " Well, I'm glad
that part's over. " he held up an unopened jar of 'mushed carrots', " I wonder if you have to keep these refridgerated. "
" Gift for Vehdgee! " Kakarrotto said eagerly.
" Really? "
Kakarrotto pulled slightly at his diaper, sending a huge burst of yellowish-brown gas into the air. Vegeta felt his
bottom left eyelid twitch.
" Gift. " Vegeta said flatly.
" GIFT!! " Kakarrotto squealed.
" For "Vehdgee". "
" That's YOU! " Kakarrotto held his hands out towards the ouji.
" Ohhhh boy. " Vegeta turned away, then zipped over to the door to Bulma's lab, " BULMA!!!! IT'S YOU'RE TURN!! I'M
NOT READY TO FACE ANOTHER ONSLAUGHT OF RECTORAL WASTE COVERED KAKA-TUSHIES!! "
" "Tushies"!! " Kakarrotto grinned happily, " I like that word! " he said in saiyago.
" BULMAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! " Vegeta shouted, then grunted when he got no response. The ouji flung open the door to the
lab to reveal another door to the lab he hadn't seen before with a note taped to it. He snorted and ripped it off the door,
" 'Dear Vegeta-kun, working with radioactive chemicals; important project, dad is supervising. Please avoid entering the
lab until the project is completed unless you want to sprout an arm from your back. Love, Bulma'. " the ouji sweatdropped,
" No thanks. " he slammed the first door shut, " I'd rather not be a fool and gain another limb in a place it's not
supposed to go. " Vegeta turned back towards Kakarrotto, " Well Kaka-chan, I guess you're going to have to wait a couple
hours to get that diaper changed. It takes Bulma at least 45 minutes just to wipe-down the lab and herself after she's
usually done working with anything radioactive. " Vegeta explained.
Kakarrotto's eyes watered, " Buh, buh, buh, buh, buh Vehdgee eh burns!!! "
" Deal with it! " Vegeta snapped, " You KNOW I'm uncomfortable about changing your diapers! Changing your diapers
means I have to take your smelly diaper off your rear end, then CLEAN your rear end and have to look upon organs I would
rather NEVER see in my lifetime, then dry you off, then put a NEW diaper on you until you dirty that one too and I have
to start the vicious cycle all over again! "
" Buh Veh-GEEEEE!!!!!! " Kakarrotto looked on the verge to pained tears, " It HURRRRRTS!!! " he sobbed, pulling at
the diaper.
" I SAID _NO_!!! "
" I said no. " Vegeta flatly repeated, " If I said "no", then HOW did I end up back upstairs with you, your smelly,
stinky, sweaty kaka-diaper, kaka-tush cleaning fluid, and new diapers! "
" Cuz Vehdgee loves me and doesn't like seeing me in pain? " Kakarrotto offered in his native tongue, giggling as he
layed back on the guest bed.
Vegeta sighed, " You big baka. " he took a clean diaper out of the bag of special ones Bulma had invented for him,
" You are so lucky you're you, Kakarrotto. If it were anyone else on that bed in a dirty diaper right now I would've
destoryed them for merely existing. "
" Guba wahhh!!! " Kakarrotto squealed, flushing from what he percieved as a compliment.
" Heh-heh, right. " Vegeta sweatdropped, " Listen, like I said before. Changing YOUR diaper makes me feel very VERY
uncomfortable, so I'd appreciate it if you'd just cooperate with me so we can get this done as quickly and painlessly as
possible, oh-kay? "
Kakarrotto nodded sweetly.
" Uh-huh. " Vegeta said dryly, then ripped off the old diaper and nearly fainted from the stench, " AAAAUGH!!!
KAKARROTTO WHAT DID YOU EAT!!! IT SMELLS LIKE YOU JUST CRAPPED A COUNTRY OUT YOUR BEHIND!! "
" Whee!!! " Kakarrotto giggled, laying back down. Vegeta dropped the toxic-smelling diaper into the trash and
sprayed the larger saiyajin down with cleaning fluid and dumped baby-powder on him. Kakarrotto blinked and looked down at
himself, " Dena ponne wah? "
" Yes the box DOES say that and NO I am NOT going to RUB IT INTO YOUR BODY!!! " Vegeta snapped, " You're lucky I'm
mad enough right now to do this without fainting from what I'm doing! " he took a new diaper out and put it on Kakarrotto
inplace of the old one, " There, better? "
" Mmm-hmm! " Kakarrotto nodded happily, " Vehdgee mahke yanana bubu Kakarrotto! " he clasped his hands together.
" Yeah....sure... " Vegeta looked away before his face could turn bright red, " Need any, help getting down? "
" Hahaha! " Kakarrotto held his arms out as Vegeta helped him off the bed, " Aww, Vehdgee naba ju-ju Ouji!! "
" I'm 'acting like a real-live Ouji'. Yah, you're, umm, welcome, Kakay. " Vegeta turned a light reddish tint, then
watched as Kakarrotto happily waddled out of the room and into the hallway only to scream in fright. Vegeta bolted to
attention and ran out after him.
" KAKARROTTO-CHAN!!!! " he screeched to a halt to find Kakarrotto staring at his reflection in the mirror with a
look of pure fear on his face, " Ka--Kakarrotto? "
" WHO IS _THAT_ GUY!!! " Kakarrotto yelped, pointing at his reflection. Vegeta sweatdropped.
" Uh-oh. "
*****************************************************************************************************************************
3:10 AM 2/16/2003
END OF PART TWO!
Chuquita: (happily) Another chapter completed!
Vegeta: Something tells me the story's chibi Kakarrotto is going to need some psychological counciling.
Goku: (appears out of nowhere) OR just a lil love & logical explaination from VEGGIE! [hugs Veggie from behind]
Vegeta: (sweatrops) How did you get back so fast! (bolts to attention) AND WHERE'S CHIBI ME!
Chibi Veggie: [sitting infront of him on the desk; back in his regular training outfit w/no fake facial hair]
(sing-song) Here I am!
Vegeta: (to Son) (flatly) You taught him how to TELEPORT, didn't you?
Chibi Veggie: [teleports to random places around the room] This is FUN!!!
Goku: Hey, I got all the fake mustache and beard off him, didn't I little Veggie?
Chuquita: He's got a point Vedge.
Vegeta: Oh SHUT UP!
Chibi Goku: (eyes fly open)
[everyone else freezes in place]
Chibi Goku: *hip, hip hip, hip* (takes a deep breath) WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Chuquita: (bottom eyelid twitches) ...oww.
Vegeta: (ears in pain) AARG! MAKE HIM STOP!!
Goku: (frowns) Poor poor chibi me. [starts rubbing chibi Goku's belly]
Chibi Goku: (quiets down) (small smiles up at Son)
Goku: (warmly) Yeah, that's it. I understand you don't like having people say (imitation Veggie) "shut up", do you?
Vegeta: (sweatdrops)
Chuquita: (snickers)
Vegeta: (grumbles) You rubbed his stomach, big deal. _I_ could rub his stomach!
Goku: Ah, but you're not me and only I really know how I like to calm down myself.
Vegeta: (confused) ....huh? (cocks his head)
Goku: Awwwww [hugs Veggie] I luv it when little Veggie's head emptys itself on him!
Vegeta: (bright red) Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-hehhh... (shakes redness from his face) Hmm, [curiously rubs adult Son's belly]
Goku: (big content smile) Mmmmmmm~~~ (faints and falls down onto floor)
Chuquita: Wow....that was fast.
Vegeta: (in surprise) I think I may have just discovered the key to Kakarrotto's weakness, AND something I can bribe him
with in order to further my kaka-servant-maid plans! (big grin)
Goku: (sits up, woozy) Heeheehee, aww Veggie--
Vegeta: (rubs Son's belly in a circle)
Goku: (bright pink) (squeals) FWHEEEEE!!! (faints again; head smacks down onto floor)
Vegeta: (evil smirk) I'm onto something.
Chibi Veggie: (w/his face pressed against a window near the ceiling) IT'S SNOWING!!
Goku: (sits up like nothing happened) (excitedly) SNOWING!?
Chuquita: (grins) We're supposed to get up to 30 inches!
Goku: WOW, that's even taller than VEGGIE!
Vegeta: (sweatdrops) I am NOT under 30 inches tall! That would put me at less than 3 FEET!!
Goku: Chibi Veggie is less than 3 feet tall...I think. (blinks as if in deep thought)
Chuquita: I read in a doujinshi somewhere that Veggie was 150cm tall. (grins) I did some math and found out it put him at
about four foot nine!
Vegeta: (falls over) You're KIDDING!!!
Chuquita: Actually w/Veggie that short it puts everyone else's height a normal size. I always thought Goku was about a foot
& a half taller than you and that would make him 6'4.
Vegeta: (glares at her)
Chuquita: What! I'm 5'4, 4'9's a reasonable size for a guy who according to the actual anime is around 132 pounds!
Vegeta: (grumbles) Yeah well you don't have to rub it in.
Chuquita: It was a doujinshi parodying movie 7 (w/the androids 13, 14, & 15) and the shorter android did a check on Veggie
w/his eyepiece thing and a whole bunch of numbers came up. 150cm was the highest number on the charts.
Vegeta: (snorts) Well I blame Freezer! He probably put a drug in my body when I wasn't looking that stopped my height from
reaching its full potential because he was scared of the really big saiyajins...I SHOULD'VE BEEN 7 FEET TALL!! TALLER THAN
NAPPA!!! TALLER THAN MY FATHER TALLER THAN-- [shadow looms over him] (pupils get really small) (looks up to see Son staring
down at him w/big sparkily eyes) (squeaks out) --Kakarrotto.
Goku: (musing) My sweet little Veggie is not even a full five feet?
Vegeta: (nervously inches away from Son who tip-toes towards him) Uhhh, I, I, I, I, I, I, I---
Chuquita: Actually the offical number the calculator pumped out was 4.925. So I guess that makes him 4 feet, 9 inches,
25 umm, 25. (sweatdrops)
Goku: Oh VEGGIE! (grabs Veggie and hugs him tightly) You are even littler than I thought! I love you.
Vegeta: (lets out strangled yelp noise)
Chibi Veggie: (runs over to them) I wanna play in the snow!
Goku: (eyes widen even larger ;if possible)
Vegeta: (squeaks out) (to Chibi Veggie) Run...run while there's still time....
Goku: [looking down at Chibi Veggie] Would EXTRA little Veggie like to come play in the snow with ME?
Chibi Veggie: (excitedly) Uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh!!! (bounces up and down)
Goku: Wow.....THIS IS GONNA BE SO MUCH FUN!!! Playin in the snow just me and my Veggies!!
Chibi Veggie: (confused) I'm not 'your' Veggie. I don't even know you that well.
Vegeta: (flatly) Believe me, you will.
Goku: (to chibi Veggie) But we can make snowmen together and build an igloo and sled and make snow-angels and it'll be
so much fun with 2 Veggies along!
Chibi Veggie: Can we have a snowball fight?
Goku: Sure!
Chibi Veggie: I'M IN!!!
Goku: (holds Veggie tighter) And what about my ~*FAVORITE*~ lil 'one inch shy of 5ft' Veggie?
Vegeta: (groans) It doesn't really matter what I say, does it?
Goku: (sweetly) Nope!
Vegeta: (sighs) Fine, I'll go.
Goku: (cheers) YIPPEE!!! VEGGIE TIME FOR ME!! [picks up chibi Goku] AN CHIBI ME TOO!! [runs off]
Chuquita: Hey, where are you going?
Goku: TO GET MY VEGGIES AND CHIBI SELF IN THEIR WINTER CLOTHES!! WANNA COME?
Chuquita: (snickers) Why not, it should be entertaining. [walks towards him and looks out the window] Just make sure you
don't lose any of them out there.
Goku: [holds the Veggies tighter] (taking her seriously) Oh don't worry, Chu-sama, I promise I'll keep my eyes on my
Veggies and chibi self!
Chuquita: Heehee, I love the snow! (to audiance) To anyone else out there who's had their Monday and probably Tuesday
school days canceled because of this blizzard, have fun!
Goku: (happily) We'll see you in part 3! I'm gonna go have fun with my little snow-veggies!
Vegeta: (flushes red) "SNOW-veggies??"