Part Three
"Buffy are you ready?" "Yeah I'm almost done, I just need to
get my veil on" finally the day had come and people were just
waiting for it to be over.
"Willow I'm dreading this wedding, I mean once they're married
we can never spilt them up" "I know Shannon it's awful, your
strangely quiet Faith" "Hey I aint worried, trust me B will not
be married to him by the end of today" "What have you done
baby?" Shannon wrapped her arms around Faith's waist trying to
coax her secret out of her "I am not telling it would spoil the
surprise" "Really? If you tell me, when we get home you can"
Shannon whispered something into Faith's ear making her want to
spill her plans instantly.
"Okay well three days ago I called Angel and his friends and
him came to town, I saw him yesterday and he told me the plan.
You see Riley has this spell on B to make her think he's her
soul mate and is more attractive than Angel and Ryan Philippe
put together" "That's not possible" "Exactly well, when it gets
to the does anybody objects, all of us, me, Willow, you, Spike,
Giles, Angel, Cordy, Doyle, Becca and Joshua are going to
object and then Joshua is going to reverse the spell" "You know
that is quite a plan but if it doesn't work Buffy may never
forgive us" "We have to try Will, hey here she comes, Buffy you
look, you look plain, the way Riley likes you" "Thanks I guess"
"So are we ready?" "Yeah it's time, let's go" Buffy left the
room and into the church where Giles was waiting, not looking
happy at all that she was actually marrying this idiot and took
his arm while he walked her down the aisle.
She was so busy staring at Riley that she didn't notice Angel
and his friends sitting at the back of the church.
"Hey Angel she looks awful in that dress, it makes her look so
frumpy" "I should defend her but I agree, the arms are too big
and the dress makes her look ten sizes bigger, Christ Riley is
crushing who she used to be into a Iowa housewife" "The worst
kind of woman there is, my aunty is from there, she's the black
sheep" "I'm not surprised princess, shh they're starting now,
Joshua are we ready?" "Yeah now on with the show".
The priest took one look at Buffy then at Riley and couldn't
help but giggle, she must see something the rest of the world
doesn't.
"We are gathered here today to witness the union of Buffy Anne
Elizabeth Summers and this beast, sorry Riley Angus Marc Finn
in Holy matrimony, now before I continue does anybody object?"
"I do" "Willow?" "So do I" "Guys what are you doing!" "I do
blooming well object" "I do and we all do" Doyle signalled to
their group while Buffy was on the verge of crying while Riley
looked confused.
"And why do you all object to this mockery of a marriage?"
"Because this here is a bloody freak!" Spike stepped forward to
Riley with cowering away from him "What the Hell did you do to
her? You are such a moron! I mean it if you get married to her
I will beat you" "I didn't do anything wrong, momma!" Riley
became more scared than when Giles had threatened him and lost
complete control of his bladder and making a awful mess on the
church floor tiles.
"Guys did he just piss himself?" "Yes Doyle we all saw that, he
has no bladder control and its fucking disgusting, oh I
shouldn't swear in church should I?" "Not really Angel but you
haven't really attended church so you could be forgiven".
"Why do you people at the back object?" "Well that pansy at the
front isn't what he appears to be" "What does that mean?"
"Well, well he's not Catholic".
Buffy tugged at Willow's arm while the priest was talking to
the strangers "Will what is going on, why are you sabotaging my
wedding day and who are those people at the back?" "There is an
explanation I just can't give you it yet, Joshua you ready?"
"Yeah, here goes, ekam em kool evitcattra ot siht lufituaeb
erutaerc. Ekam em kool ekil legnA dna nayR EppilihP denibmoc.
Ekam siht namow kniht I ma reh luos etam, ekam reh kinht I ma
ton ym eurt mrof. Ekam reh evol em won!" Joshua threw his hands
up in the air and all of a sudden Riley began to glow and
doubled over in pain while Buffy went blind for a few seconds
then got her sight back.
Riley stood up and he had spots all over his face, he had
greasy blonde hair with braces and was about 5'0. He was
clearly a weakling and Buffy was disgusted that she was about
to marry him.
"You've wrecked it! It was perfect and now you've all wrecked
it!" "Shut up, why was I about to marry him!" "It's him, I know
it, Angel come out, come out wherever you are! I know you just
had to wreck it for me" "What Angel's here?" Angel stood up and
slowly walked to the front of the church where Buffy was
looking in horror at her dress.
"Yeah I'm here" he pulled the sleeves of Buffy's dress and the
extra material off the skirt making her look her normal size
and making the dress look brilliant.
"Wow, that is one brave move and a beautiful dress now" "It is
love, I bet you they get back together" "I hope so".
Buffy stared into Angel's eyes and he just looked how amazing
she looked now.
"So this was your plan to take my woman!" Riley hit Angel but
he just threw him into the confessionals rendering him
unconscious. "So you still wanna get married?" "What? You still
love me?" "I never stopped loving you and you have the dress so
why not" "Okay, I love you so much you know" Angel picked Buffy
up and spun her around then stood in front of the priest "You
mind marrying us two?" "Of course not, I'm glad you have seen
the light my child, okay what is your name sir?" "Liam Sean
Patrick Joseph O'Reilly" "Are you Irish?" "Yes I am, so shall
you tell them?" "Yes, ok if the congregation does not mind we
would like you to witness the union of these two persons"
everybody cheered thanking God they had got rid of Riley.
"We are here today to witness the union of these two persons
and if anybody objects please speak now" "I do, he doesn't have
a best man" "Quite right, who would you like as your best man
Liam?" "Doyle" Doyle came to Angel's side and they continued
with the wedding "We are here today to witness the union of
Buffy Anne Elizabeth Summers and Liam Sean Patrick Joseph
O'Reilly." " I Buffy Anne Elizabeth Summers take this man to be
my lawfully wedded husband in sickness and health, for rich or
poor, better or worse, till death do us part" she gripped
Angel's hand tightly "I Liam Sean Patrick Joseph O'Reilly take
this woman to be my lawfully wedded wife in sickness and
health, rich or poor, for better or worse, till death do us
part" "Do you have the rings?" Willow handed Buffy the ring and
Doyle handed Angel the diamond claddagh ring, which he had had
for years "Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded
wife?" "I do" "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded
husband?" "I do" "You may kiss the bride" they shared their
first kiss as husband and wife "I present to you Mr and Mrs
O'Reilly".
The group cheered then they left the church each kicking Riley
as they left.
Part Two of
Gross expectations coming soon.