Fey: Okay, Dark-Phoenix, Callie has something to tell you…
Callie: I am the Devi/Megami/Ubaste of all things Random and Insane. I'm the Indian-Japanese-Egyptian version—you must be the American version, Ms. Queen of Bunnies!
Bakura: Ah. Okay, well Sungirl and Fay—
Fey: (grins)
Bakura: Not you!
Fey: T_T
Bakura: Uhh, well, sorry about the whole Yugi thing. Téa and Kaiba—
Fey: Yeccchh.
Bakura: Well, Fey doesn't like that pairing.
Callie: At all. (pause) Bakura, you're queer.
Bakura: I am not! Where'd you get that from?!
Callie: Look above.
Bakura: (looks) Oh, right, the…thing of all things random and insane.
Callie: ON WITH THE STORY!! Oh, Fey doesn't own anything you recognize from somewhere other than her fanfiction.
***
Our uh,…heroes are on their way to the mall.
Isis: (whispers) Nakuru, you like Kaiba-kun, right?
Nakuru: No! I most certainly do not!!
Mai: You might have gone to Oxford College in England, and you might be the oldest here, but you can't tell that you like Kaiba?
Nakuru: I DON'T!!!
Téa: (laughs) Liar.
Serenity: You should tell him how you feel.
Callie: In English. (A/N: Let's just say they've been speaking Japanese except when they talk to the people here and in Europe, 'kay?)
All girls: Naaaanniii…?!
Callie: Well, why not? C'mon! Just give it a shot, okay?
All other girls except Nakuru: Yeah! C'mon!
Mai: Such a cute couple!
Nakuru: (blushes) Errr…okay. (goes up to Kaiba)
Kaiba: Hey, you want to tell me something?
Nakuru: Huh!? How'd you know?
Kaiba: Well, I saw all those girls talking around and to you, and they were giggling too. And some of them were looking at me. ^_^ Does this have to do with work?
Nakuru: -_-;;;(sweatdrop) (thinks) How'd I fall in love with such a thick guy?! That seems to run in the family. Ryou and I all seem to fall for clueless, dense, and thick people….
***
Fey: Wow, that's true. Hey, maybe I should stop here for the suspense! Hahahaa…!!!!!!!!!
Bakura: Baka-san! You've only written less than 200 words! (bops her—again!)
Fey: You just said Baka-san…Baka means idiot, right?
Bakura: Riiiight.
Fey: And "san" is a term of affection, si?
Bakura: Oui…
Fey: So you just called me an idiot affectingly and then you bopped me?!
Bakura: Uhhh, yeah, that's about right. -_-;;; (sweatdrop)
***
Kaiba: Sooo, what'd you wanna say?
Nakuru: Ah-ash—(covers her mouth)(thinks) Callie-san said in English…why don't I do that?
Kaiba: Well?
Nakuru: Ah—Ahhh…
Kaiba: You arent' going to sneeze, are you?
Nakuru: No! Errr…(freaks out and forgets all she learned on English) Errr! I EAT YOU!!
Kaiba: (sweatdrops) E-Excuse me?
Nakuru: Oh, dammit! (thinks) Okay I'll try again. (talks) Waaaah…(freaks out completely this time) CAMEL SPIT!!!
Kaiba: (bigger sweatdrops) Na-NANI?!
Nakuru: Ohh! (runs back to the girls)
Isis: (sweatdrops) Maybe you should say it in Japanese?
Callie: (whispering) Just don't sneeze when saying it, okay?
Nakuru: Er, okay. (goes back to Kaiba)
Kaiba: Are you okay?!
Nakuru: (blushes) Yeah.
Kaiba: What'd'you want to tell me?
Nakuru: err, Seto, we've been friends for a while and…I…Ash—(sneezes and talks at the same time) ASHITERU!!!
Kaiba: Geisundeit! (sry w/spelling)
Nakuru: T_T Err…I'll tell you later! (goes back to girls)
Kaiba: ???? Okaaay….
All boys: (roll their eyes because THEY get it)
Téa: So? Did you tell him?
Nakuru: Err, not exactly…
Mai: Hey, look! Macy's! (goes in dragging all the boys minus Malik, plus Callie) (Oy Vay, Macy's is taking over the world!)
Téa: Ohh!!! What should we buy?
Nakuru: Let's not buy anything—let's just try stuff on that we like!
Isis: And we could make the boys try on stuff!
Boys excluding Malik: Yaaaahhh!!!!!
Malik: Ohohohohoho…
***
Tomoyo/Madison(ugh-dubbed name): HEY! That's my laugh!!! How dare he?!
Fey: Oy, what're you doing here? You're supposed to be in the Card Captor Sakura books and fanfiction! Besides, you're paired with Eriol, not Malik!
Tomoyo: (blushes) Oh! N-no! (POOF!)
Bakura: What's Card Captor Sakura?
Fey: O.o You don't know?! Here! (hands him CCS book 1) Now read!
Bakura: ^_^ Hey, this is cool!
Fey: (to you only) He's gonna KILL me when he finds out it's shoujo manga!!
***
Callie: (whew) I'm safe. (She's not a boy, if you don't get it.-_-;;)
Serenity: Ah, and what about Callie-san?
Isis: (laughs—a bit evilly) Her too.
Callie: Ahh! No! (thinks fast) Uhhh, Bakura-chan! (grabs him)
Bakura: Nani?
Callie: (thinks) Oh Gods, what am I doing… (talks) You know that song that you liked and heard in the car?! Let's go to the CD store and check it out!
Tristan, Ryou: (quickly) We'll go too!
Serenity: (giggles) I'll come to, Callie-san.
All of them went. Of course, the girls tried to stop them, but they had already left.
Joey, Kaiba, Yugi, Yami, Marik: Hey, guys wait!!!
Yugi: Too late!
Joey: Noo!!! Come back! Be our heroes! (falls down on the ground on his knees and beats the ground) HELP!
Yami: Joey-kun, this is no time for that!
Girls left: (cackle like maniacs) HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! (whip crack) *Snap*
Boys left, 'cept for Malik: NNNNNOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
*
Bakura: So, what was that song called?
All except Bakura and his hikari: (nervous about him thinking TOO much on blood) Uhhh…
Ryou: Eerr…. (that's what Brits say! :D)
Serenity: It was called…"I Love You"!
All except Bakura: O.o;;
Bakura: Oooh…really? Who's it by?
Others: (muffled snorts and laughs because Bakura actually BELIEVES them)
Serenity: (covers her mouth so as not to laugh) Barney.
Bakura: What section is he in?
Tristan: (checks the store signs) Hm, it should be over there. (points to "Little Kids' Section; Worldwide Baby Songs")
Bakura: Are you sure?
Tristan: Positive, man.
Bakura: OKAY! (hops over there)
There was a shocked silence.
Ryou: (slowly) Is it just me, or did my yami just…hop…over to the kids' section?
Serenity: Oh-ho, yeah.
Callie: That was the great Tomb Robber hopping.
After this, the other teenagers—
Callie: I'm not a teenager!
Amaya, he yami: You must certainly are!
Callie: Well, not totally! (sticks out her tongue)
—Okay, the other people who were there started to listen to their songs on the headphones that were given.
Ryou: (listening to "I Tried So Hard")
Tristan: (listening to "Just Push Play")
Callie, Serenity: (listening to Aretha Franklin's "Respect") (I love that song, anyone know where to download it?)
When, suddenly, two figures were staring out of the bushes at Serenity and Callie.
Figure #1: Are you sure?
Figure #2: Absolutely. See, the girl with the brown-red hair is wearing a handbag with the tag "Japan" on it?
F#1: And the other?
F#2: Look at her hair, man. Only certain girls can have that kind of hair, and besides, she's friends with the brown haired one.
F#1: Okay…when I say three….
F #1 & F#2: THREE! (both jump out and attack Callie and Serenity by putting chloroform cloths over their mouths) (take them somewhere)
The boys in the music store: (haven't noticed quite yet)
*
Yugi: (to Joey) Why don't you talk to Mai? She's the one leading them.
Joey: Yeah, but she's also the one with Isis holding a whip each!
Since the last time we saw our friends in Macy's, they'd been promised to being forced to wear clothes. Every kind. Boys' clothes, girls' clothes, pants, jeans, dresses, skirts….I think one was forced into trying on a wedding dress…look, here he comes now.
Yami: (wearing wedding dress) This is a disgrace! I am a Pharoah! Y'hear?! A PHA-raoh!!!!!!!!!!
All girls + Malik: (snerk) (snort/smirk) (My word!)
Amaya, Callie's yami, who joined the group just then on one of her airplanes: We-ell, the Pharaoh look's mighty fine in what he's wearing, that's all I'm sayin'!
Yami: (blushes)
All: (snicker)
Yami: (blushes harder and starts to rant some more)
*
Some place in Moscow, Serenity and Callie are both waking up to a locked white room in two beds.
Serenity: (getting up bleary-eyed) Callie-san?
Callie: (getting up, but refusing to open her eyes) Ne?
Serenity: Uh. Where are we?
Callie: (rubs her eyes) No idea, Serenity. No idea. But we'll get out somehow! I promise! Now, let's see if I can conjure a tree to break the door down….
***
Fey: Don't worry. I'll update soon. But, we have something to tell you.
Bakura: February 26th 2003, is Holocaust Memorial Day. Please remember this event. We don't want history to repeat itself.
Callie: And don't hate the German, Japanese, or Italian on what their relatives might've done. It's harder for them then it is you.
Everyone in Fey's fics, Fey: (silent)