Title: A Luthor Christmas
Author: MitchPell
Rating: R
Pairing: Lex/Clark
Disclaimer: I don't own anything that has to do with Smallville; it's characters, DC comics, or the WB. I'm just using their stuff for a little bit of non-profitable fun.
Authors Notes: My thanks go out to Adri, my wonderful beta-reader! I had to through in all of the James. I reminds me so much of my family. My grandpa is named John, my dad is named John, and my brother is named John. Then I have an Uncle Mike and two cousins named Mike. LOL! Luckily everyone has nicknames! This is part of the Slash Advent Calendar Challenge situated at: http://www.kardasi.com/Advent. This story was actually rated NC-17, but I toned it down to an R rating so I could post it here. If you are interested in reading the NC-17 version, you can find it up at my site: www.geocities.com/mitchpell.
Summary: Most people assume that the Luthor Annual Christmas Party is a big company party. But what if it isn't?
Email: mitchpell@yahoo.com
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Phaze: Thanks! I'm glad you found my depiction of Lex realistic and insightful. Yes, unfortunately, poor Lex is a recluse. But that is part of the reason I love him. LOL! Am I that predictable? Darn! No, I knew it was pretty obvious what the next chapter would entail. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks again for taking the time to read and review! I appreciate it!
ren: Thanks! I'm glad you liked it so far. Yes, I'm going to do a few chapters that will cover his teens. In fact, the first one starts right now! So, I hope you enjoy! Thanks again for the review!
************************************************************************
A thirteen-year-old Lex Luthor quietly followed his father up the front steps of his Grandfather's country home. He wasn't sure whether or not he wanted to be there or not. In some ways, it would be nice to be around other people. He didn't know if he could stand to be alone with his father for another minute. But then, it was Christmas, and his mother wasn't there. And she never would be again.
He stopped at the bottom of the steps and took a minute to compose himself, pushing back the tears that were building up behind his eyes. He took a deep shaky breath, watching his breath in the cold December air. He looked up at his father who was impatiently, yet silently, waiting for him at the top of the steps. Lex wondered if this was as hard on his father as it was on him. His father had been uncharacteristically understanding for the first few weeks after his mother's death. Then what seemed like overnight, the understanding stopped, and his father became his usual overbearing, self-absorbed self. But tonight, he seemed a little softer. And for that, Lex was grateful.
"Lex," Lionel called from the top of the steps. "You might not get sick anymore, but I do. And I don't want to catch a cold while waiting for you in this frigid weather."
Lex starred at his father for a minute. It just now occurred to him that his father always waited for him at the door. It was practically tradition for Lex to stop outside the house and reflect about something, anything really. He didn't know why he did it, but he did. It was a habit, and one he didn't see any reason to break. But for some reason, he just now noticed that his father would wait until he was done before entering the house. Lex didn't know his reason for waiting. It probably had something to do with appearing as a family. But tonight, he was going to pretend that it was because his father cared. After all, it couldn't hurt to pretend for just this once.
"Lex!" His father called a little more hotly.
"Sorry," Lex said as he continued to climb the steps then followed his father into the house.
They were met at the door by Margaret, as usual. "Good evening, Mr. Luthor." She said as she took his coat and scarf. And as usual, Lionel gave her a curt nod and then proceeded on into the house.
Lex let out a sigh as he removed his hat, gloves, coat, and scarf. "Hello, Margaret." He said as he handed his stuff to her. He didn't feel particularly chatty, but his mother had always been nice to the woman. And since she was gone, Lex figured he should at least make an attempt.
Margaret smiled down at him. "Hello, Lex. How are you doing?"
Lex tried to give her a small smile. "I'm," he paused for a minute as if searching for the correct answer, "fine." He finally told her. He just stood there for a minute as if contemplating his answer then snapped out of his trance. "You?" He asked.
"I'm fine, thank you." She replied.
"That's good." He said absently. "Well I'm going to." He gestured down the hall.
"Of course." Margaret replied.
Lex gave her a small nod then made his way down the hall towards the kitchen. He entered the somewhat large room and found, as he expected, his grandma, his Aunt Mel, and Marie. He walked up to where his grandma was sitting at the kitchen table and wrapped his thin arms around. "Hi, Grandma." He said before placing a small kiss on her cheek.
"Why, Lex," Emma said, "I'm surprised that I didn't have to guilt you into my kiss and hug this year."
Lex smiled at her then sat down at the table. "I guess I just decided to save myself the trouble of trying to get out of it this time." He lied. Truth-be-told he had just wanted that small amount of human contact that had been missing since his mother's death. It was weak of him, he knew. But at the moment, he didn't care. What his father didn't know couldn't hurt him. "So, how have you been, Grandma?" He asked.
"Oh, I'm doing well." She told him. "I had a cold earlier this month, but I was able to get over it. So I can't complain." She looked at him for a minute then asked, "And how about yourself?"
"I'm fine." He replied with a shrug of his shoulders.
Emma knew her grandson was lying, but decided she wouldn't call him on it. She figured he wouldn't want to talk with Melinda and Marie in the room. The room was uncomfortably silent for a while with no one really knowing what to say. "Well," she finally said, "how about you and I join the rest of the family in the sitting room, Lex?"
"Alright," he replied. He rose out of his chair and went to leave the room, but not before stealing a piece of turkey off the platter.
"I caught that, Alexander!" His Aunt Mel scolded.
Lex didn't reply, however, he just merely continued down the hall behind his grandmother. The living room looked as it did every year. The same looking tree, the same train set running through the same small, the same stockings hung on the same mantelpiece, the same people sitting in the same places. Everything was the same, except for the vacant seat beside his father. Lex ran a hand over his smooth head then crossed the room and sat beside his father.
Neither his father nor his grandfather acknowledged his presence, but that didn't bother him. It was almost better that way. The two never had anything pleasant to say about him anyway. Lex took the time to look over his family members. His Uncle James and his Aunt Meg appeared to be in a deep conversation. James and Lydia were sitting with their father looking bored. While William was avidly listening to whatever his Uncle Robert was telling him. Lex watched William and his Uncle Robert talking. He wished that he and his father had as amiable relationship as William appeared to have with Uncle Robert. But he knew that would never happen, so there was no use wishing.
He then directed his attention back to James and Lydia. The two were sitting as far away from each other as possible. Lex knew that they didn't get along with each other half the time. And he idly wondered if he and Julian would have gotten along. Sure there would have been eleven years between them, which was a lot compared to the three years separating Lydia and James. But despite the difference in age, Lex thinks they would have been close.
He looked over to the mantelpiece at the four red stockings hanging there. There had been five one year, and he had to wonder what his grandmother had done with Julian's. It was probably stuck in a box somewhere up in the attic, with all the long forgotten stockings of his father and his aunts and uncles, put into storage after they were deemed to old for such childish things. He wondered when his stocking would be added to that box. He was almost willing to bet money that it would be soon, too soon. Before he was ready to give up his childlike inclinations and act like a responsible young adult.
But then, with his mother gone he had probably already taken that step. There was no one left to baby him. His mother was dead and Pam had left. Lex scoffed. His father certainly wasn't going to allow him to indulge in any of his previously childish habits. He was being forced to grow up, and he wasn't ready.
Lex was startled out of his thoughts when Margaret entered the room and informed them that dinner was ready. He followed the rest of the family as they all filed out of the living room and into the dining room. He sat down at his usual seat and looked over at the vacant chair across from his father. As he looked at that open chair, he could only hope that diner would pass quickly.
To his relief it did, and he soon found himself trailing his three cousins up the stairs of the large house. But instead of heading off to the entertainment room, as usual, Lex turned toward his bedroom. However, this change in plan didn't go unnoticed by James.
"Hey, Beets!" He called down the hall. "Where do you think you're going?" He asked.
Lex turned to face his cousins. "To my room." He replied.
James scoffed. "No you're not." He stated.
Lex glared at him. "Excuse me?"
"We always play Monopoly after dinner, Lex. You just can't go and break tradition!" James exclaimed.
"Yeah, well, maybe it's time some of the traditions changed." Lex replied before turning to go back to his room.
James snorted and rolled his eyes. "You know what, Lex." He spat. "She died fucking months ago. Get over it already."
Lex whirled around and looked at his cousin, his face a mixture of pure hatred and extreme anguish. "Don't you dare!" He yelled. "You have no idea what it's like! None of you! Your mother's are all downstairs sipping imported wine and discussing the boring details of their fucking mundane lives! But mines not! And she never will be again, because she's dead! And you have no idea what that's like! So don't you stand there and tell me to get over it!" With that he turned back around and stormed off to his room.
Lex slammed his door shut once he had entered his room. He flung himself on his large bed, and starred at the snow globe setting on his nightstand. Without thinking, grabbed the globe and threw it against his bedroom door. It hit the hard wood and shattered. Shards of glass fell to the floor in a shower of water and white flakes, accompanied by the heavy base of the globe.
Lex sat there on his bed for a minute, starring as the pool of water and glass ran across the floor of his bedroom. He slowly lowered himself to the floor and walked over to the chaos before him. He carefully reached out and picked up the base of the snow globe. The small figure of his mother had been completely busted off, and the upper half of his father's was missing as well. Lex sat down on the ground, just out of reach of the puddle of water and the sea of glass, rotating the broken globe in his hands. He then placed the heavy base down beside him and began to search for the missing pieces of his mother and father. He found the upper half of his father first, which he carefully picked up and placed within the pieces of glass still branching up from the broken base. Then he found the figure of his mother. But when he reached up to pick her up, he flinched back as a shard of glass pierced his finger.
Lex watched the small droplets of blood well up then trickle down his slim finger. Fascinated, he picked up one of the larger pieces of glass and deepened the cut. And a thought occurred to him, as he watched the blood stream down his hand and puddle on the floor. It would be so easy. All it would take would be two swift cuts. No one would know. They wouldn't come looking for him until morning, and by that time it would be hours too late. He eyed the sharp glass in his hand as he slowly turned over his left hand and exposed his wrist. But as he looked down, prepared to make the cut, he saw the face of Napoleon starring up at him. Appalled by what he had almost done, Lex dropped the piece of glass, hurriedly pushed himself off the floor, and backed up to his bed. He let himself fall onto the soft mattress, and sat there, starring at disarray across the room.
Lex gasped as he felt himself fall off his bed, hitting the ground with a yelp of surprise and a loud thud. He groaned as he rolled over and looked up at his ceiling. He didn't remember falling asleep, but he figured it must have been shortly after he broke the snow globe. He pushed himself into a sitting position then rubbed his hands across his face and head. He glanced up at the clock on his nightstand, which read 2:00 am. Stifling a yawn, he stood up and surveyed the mess. It hadn't changed much since he had last looked at it, but it did appear that the floor had soaked up some of the water. Lex just hoped that it didn't damage the floor or the ceiling beneath him, or his grandfather would be pissed.
He quickly snuck out of his room, carefully dodging the pieces of glass, and made his way down the bathroom. He grabbed a couple of towels then made his way back to the room. Before soaking up the water, Lex picked up the figure of his mother, placed it within the broken globe then placed the globe back on his nightstand. He then mopped up the water and glass with the towels. When he was finished he shook out the towels over his garbage can then tossed them in the hamper. That finished, he quickly changed into his pajamas then headed downstairs to the kitchen.
Lex flipped on the light in the kitchen and headed over to the refrigerator. He wasn't the least bit hunger, but he didn't want to just sit there at the table either. He spotted a bowl of grapes setting towards the back and pulled them out. He then sat down at the table and just kind of starred at the bowl of fruit.
"I didn't realize fruit was so fascinating." Emma Luthor remarked as she entered the kitchen and sat across from her grandson at the table.
Lex shrugged his shoulders. "I was just thinking." He told her.
Emma nodded her head. There really wasn't any need to ask what about, she was pretty sure that she already knew. She reached over and snapped off a small bunch of grapes and ate then silently, waiting for Lex to tell her whatever was on his mind. And after a few minutes he did.
"James told me I should be over it by now." Lex told her. "And I thought I was, moving on I mean, especially after school started. But.around Thanksgiving, I started getting really depressed." Lex let out a small humorless laugh. "We didn't even really celebrate Thanksgiving. But I just couldn't stop thinking about her. And I haven't been able to stop since."
Emma frowned. "Have you spoken to your father?" She asked.
Lex scoffed. "No. I can't talk to him. He doesn't listen to me. And besides, I don't think he would understand anyway."
"Alexander! Now, I know you father isn't the warmest of individuals, but he did love your mother. Therefore, he is feeling the same lose that you are." Emma informed him.
"Yeah, well, unlike my father I can't replace my mother by inviting a million different women into my bed." Lex shot back.
Emma sighed as she looked at her grandson. "No, I suppose not. I'm sorry, Lex, I didn't realize he was doing that." She knew that her thirty-one year old son had every right to sleep with whomever he pleased. But she didn't much like the idea of him parading a million different woman of in front of her thirteen-year-old grandson.
"It's alright, Grandma. After all, he should be allowed to move on with his life shouldn't he?" Lex asked.
"Of course he should, Lex. But so should you." Emma replied, giving him a small smile.
"Well, I'm going to go back to bed." Lex told her after a moment of silence.
"Alright." Emma said. Sensing that Lex still needed to get something off his chest, she followed him up the stairs to his room.
"Grandma, what are you doing?" Lex asked as he started up the stairs.
"I'm coming with you." She told him.
Knowing that he wouldn't be able to convince her otherwise, Lex merely sighed and shook his head. "Whatever." He mumbled, before continuing towards his room. Once there he made his way over to his bed and lay down.
Emma followed Lex into his room and sat down on her edge of his bed. She glanced over at the nightstand and noticed the broken snow globe. "What happened to your snow globe?" She asked him.
"I broke it after a fight with James." He told her. He reached out and picked up the figure of his mother and just looked at it for a minute. He could feel the tears welling up behind his eyes and he took a deep breath. "You know, I never got to say goodbye." He whispered. "I kept looking and looking for a cure, something, anything to allow her to hang on just a little bit longer." He paused around the hitch in his breathing. "But, there was nothing, no miracle cure or operation, and she died. And I wasn't there." At that moment, the tears that he had been holding back since last May started to fall. Lex clutched his pillow tight to his chest. "I didn't get to say goodbye," he repeated. "I didn't get to tell her I loved her one last time. And now I never will."
Emma pulled her grandson into a hug and held on to him as his body shook with his broken sobs. Lex buried his face into the crock of her neck, and let the tears fall. "And it wasn't just mom, but Julian and Pam too. They all just left me. Why did they leave me?" He choked out.
"It's alright, Lex," Emma said as she rubbed circles on his back. "Just let it all out."
So he did. He just held on to his grandmother and let all his grief flow out of him along with his tears. He wasn't sure how long he cried. And he didn't really care, because when the sobs finally stopped he felt better. The loss was still there, but it felt as if a great weight had been lifted off his chest. He finally pulled back from the comfort of his grandmother's arms and wiped his running nose and eyes on his shirtsleeve. He took a few deep, calming breaths then gave his grandma a small smile.
"Do you feel a little better now?" She asked him.
"Yeah, a little." He replied, as he looked down at the red-haired figurine still in his hands. "Does it ever go away?" He asked. "The pain, I mean?"
Emma shook her head. "No, it doesn't. It will fade." She told him. "But it will never be completely gone."
Lex nodded his head in understanding. "I didn't think so." He whispered.
They sat in silence for a minute then Emma said, "How about you try and get some sleep, now?"
Lex rolled his eyes then buried himself underneath his blankets. He reached over and placed the figure on the broken globe base, before turning back to his grandma.
"Do you want me to have the globe fixed?" She asked him.
Lex looked back over at the globe and the jagged glass edges sticking up out of the base. He took in the whole yet detached figure of his mother and the mangled figure of his father. He thought about the events that led to the marred state of the globe and what had almost occurred afterwards. He then turned back to his grandma and shook his head. "No," he told her. "I want to keep it as it is."
Emma frowned. "Alright, if that's what you want." She squeezed his hand then rose off the bed. "Sleep well, Lex."
"Good night, Grandma." He replied. He watched her walk towards the door then called out, "Grandma."
"Yes, Lex?"
"Thank you."
"You're welcome." And with that she left the room, and closed the door behind her.
The following morning flew by as it always did. Lex was surprised when James actually apologized to him. But he quickly recovered from his shock and graciously accepted the gesture. After breakfast, the family held the usual gift exchange. He received the usual clothes and books on history, world domination, and the likes from most of his family. But his grandmother, however, gave him a book of collective poems, something his mother would have owned. He ran his hand over the hardbound book then gave her an appreciative smile.
As Lex bundled up to face the cold December weather, he reflected on what his grandmother had told him. He knew things would never be the same without his mother, but that didn't mean that he had to be miserable. Therefore, it was with newly found hope that Lex Luthor kissed his grandma goodbye, before walking down the front steps of her house, and climbing into the car.
TBC.
Author: MitchPell
Rating: R
Pairing: Lex/Clark
Disclaimer: I don't own anything that has to do with Smallville; it's characters, DC comics, or the WB. I'm just using their stuff for a little bit of non-profitable fun.
Authors Notes: My thanks go out to Adri, my wonderful beta-reader! I had to through in all of the James. I reminds me so much of my family. My grandpa is named John, my dad is named John, and my brother is named John. Then I have an Uncle Mike and two cousins named Mike. LOL! Luckily everyone has nicknames! This is part of the Slash Advent Calendar Challenge situated at: http://www.kardasi.com/Advent. This story was actually rated NC-17, but I toned it down to an R rating so I could post it here. If you are interested in reading the NC-17 version, you can find it up at my site: www.geocities.com/mitchpell.
Summary: Most people assume that the Luthor Annual Christmas Party is a big company party. But what if it isn't?
Email: mitchpell@yahoo.com
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Phaze: Thanks! I'm glad you found my depiction of Lex realistic and insightful. Yes, unfortunately, poor Lex is a recluse. But that is part of the reason I love him. LOL! Am I that predictable? Darn! No, I knew it was pretty obvious what the next chapter would entail. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks again for taking the time to read and review! I appreciate it!
ren: Thanks! I'm glad you liked it so far. Yes, I'm going to do a few chapters that will cover his teens. In fact, the first one starts right now! So, I hope you enjoy! Thanks again for the review!
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A thirteen-year-old Lex Luthor quietly followed his father up the front steps of his Grandfather's country home. He wasn't sure whether or not he wanted to be there or not. In some ways, it would be nice to be around other people. He didn't know if he could stand to be alone with his father for another minute. But then, it was Christmas, and his mother wasn't there. And she never would be again.
He stopped at the bottom of the steps and took a minute to compose himself, pushing back the tears that were building up behind his eyes. He took a deep shaky breath, watching his breath in the cold December air. He looked up at his father who was impatiently, yet silently, waiting for him at the top of the steps. Lex wondered if this was as hard on his father as it was on him. His father had been uncharacteristically understanding for the first few weeks after his mother's death. Then what seemed like overnight, the understanding stopped, and his father became his usual overbearing, self-absorbed self. But tonight, he seemed a little softer. And for that, Lex was grateful.
"Lex," Lionel called from the top of the steps. "You might not get sick anymore, but I do. And I don't want to catch a cold while waiting for you in this frigid weather."
Lex starred at his father for a minute. It just now occurred to him that his father always waited for him at the door. It was practically tradition for Lex to stop outside the house and reflect about something, anything really. He didn't know why he did it, but he did. It was a habit, and one he didn't see any reason to break. But for some reason, he just now noticed that his father would wait until he was done before entering the house. Lex didn't know his reason for waiting. It probably had something to do with appearing as a family. But tonight, he was going to pretend that it was because his father cared. After all, it couldn't hurt to pretend for just this once.
"Lex!" His father called a little more hotly.
"Sorry," Lex said as he continued to climb the steps then followed his father into the house.
They were met at the door by Margaret, as usual. "Good evening, Mr. Luthor." She said as she took his coat and scarf. And as usual, Lionel gave her a curt nod and then proceeded on into the house.
Lex let out a sigh as he removed his hat, gloves, coat, and scarf. "Hello, Margaret." He said as he handed his stuff to her. He didn't feel particularly chatty, but his mother had always been nice to the woman. And since she was gone, Lex figured he should at least make an attempt.
Margaret smiled down at him. "Hello, Lex. How are you doing?"
Lex tried to give her a small smile. "I'm," he paused for a minute as if searching for the correct answer, "fine." He finally told her. He just stood there for a minute as if contemplating his answer then snapped out of his trance. "You?" He asked.
"I'm fine, thank you." She replied.
"That's good." He said absently. "Well I'm going to." He gestured down the hall.
"Of course." Margaret replied.
Lex gave her a small nod then made his way down the hall towards the kitchen. He entered the somewhat large room and found, as he expected, his grandma, his Aunt Mel, and Marie. He walked up to where his grandma was sitting at the kitchen table and wrapped his thin arms around. "Hi, Grandma." He said before placing a small kiss on her cheek.
"Why, Lex," Emma said, "I'm surprised that I didn't have to guilt you into my kiss and hug this year."
Lex smiled at her then sat down at the table. "I guess I just decided to save myself the trouble of trying to get out of it this time." He lied. Truth-be-told he had just wanted that small amount of human contact that had been missing since his mother's death. It was weak of him, he knew. But at the moment, he didn't care. What his father didn't know couldn't hurt him. "So, how have you been, Grandma?" He asked.
"Oh, I'm doing well." She told him. "I had a cold earlier this month, but I was able to get over it. So I can't complain." She looked at him for a minute then asked, "And how about yourself?"
"I'm fine." He replied with a shrug of his shoulders.
Emma knew her grandson was lying, but decided she wouldn't call him on it. She figured he wouldn't want to talk with Melinda and Marie in the room. The room was uncomfortably silent for a while with no one really knowing what to say. "Well," she finally said, "how about you and I join the rest of the family in the sitting room, Lex?"
"Alright," he replied. He rose out of his chair and went to leave the room, but not before stealing a piece of turkey off the platter.
"I caught that, Alexander!" His Aunt Mel scolded.
Lex didn't reply, however, he just merely continued down the hall behind his grandmother. The living room looked as it did every year. The same looking tree, the same train set running through the same small, the same stockings hung on the same mantelpiece, the same people sitting in the same places. Everything was the same, except for the vacant seat beside his father. Lex ran a hand over his smooth head then crossed the room and sat beside his father.
Neither his father nor his grandfather acknowledged his presence, but that didn't bother him. It was almost better that way. The two never had anything pleasant to say about him anyway. Lex took the time to look over his family members. His Uncle James and his Aunt Meg appeared to be in a deep conversation. James and Lydia were sitting with their father looking bored. While William was avidly listening to whatever his Uncle Robert was telling him. Lex watched William and his Uncle Robert talking. He wished that he and his father had as amiable relationship as William appeared to have with Uncle Robert. But he knew that would never happen, so there was no use wishing.
He then directed his attention back to James and Lydia. The two were sitting as far away from each other as possible. Lex knew that they didn't get along with each other half the time. And he idly wondered if he and Julian would have gotten along. Sure there would have been eleven years between them, which was a lot compared to the three years separating Lydia and James. But despite the difference in age, Lex thinks they would have been close.
He looked over to the mantelpiece at the four red stockings hanging there. There had been five one year, and he had to wonder what his grandmother had done with Julian's. It was probably stuck in a box somewhere up in the attic, with all the long forgotten stockings of his father and his aunts and uncles, put into storage after they were deemed to old for such childish things. He wondered when his stocking would be added to that box. He was almost willing to bet money that it would be soon, too soon. Before he was ready to give up his childlike inclinations and act like a responsible young adult.
But then, with his mother gone he had probably already taken that step. There was no one left to baby him. His mother was dead and Pam had left. Lex scoffed. His father certainly wasn't going to allow him to indulge in any of his previously childish habits. He was being forced to grow up, and he wasn't ready.
Lex was startled out of his thoughts when Margaret entered the room and informed them that dinner was ready. He followed the rest of the family as they all filed out of the living room and into the dining room. He sat down at his usual seat and looked over at the vacant chair across from his father. As he looked at that open chair, he could only hope that diner would pass quickly.
To his relief it did, and he soon found himself trailing his three cousins up the stairs of the large house. But instead of heading off to the entertainment room, as usual, Lex turned toward his bedroom. However, this change in plan didn't go unnoticed by James.
"Hey, Beets!" He called down the hall. "Where do you think you're going?" He asked.
Lex turned to face his cousins. "To my room." He replied.
James scoffed. "No you're not." He stated.
Lex glared at him. "Excuse me?"
"We always play Monopoly after dinner, Lex. You just can't go and break tradition!" James exclaimed.
"Yeah, well, maybe it's time some of the traditions changed." Lex replied before turning to go back to his room.
James snorted and rolled his eyes. "You know what, Lex." He spat. "She died fucking months ago. Get over it already."
Lex whirled around and looked at his cousin, his face a mixture of pure hatred and extreme anguish. "Don't you dare!" He yelled. "You have no idea what it's like! None of you! Your mother's are all downstairs sipping imported wine and discussing the boring details of their fucking mundane lives! But mines not! And she never will be again, because she's dead! And you have no idea what that's like! So don't you stand there and tell me to get over it!" With that he turned back around and stormed off to his room.
Lex slammed his door shut once he had entered his room. He flung himself on his large bed, and starred at the snow globe setting on his nightstand. Without thinking, grabbed the globe and threw it against his bedroom door. It hit the hard wood and shattered. Shards of glass fell to the floor in a shower of water and white flakes, accompanied by the heavy base of the globe.
Lex sat there on his bed for a minute, starring as the pool of water and glass ran across the floor of his bedroom. He slowly lowered himself to the floor and walked over to the chaos before him. He carefully reached out and picked up the base of the snow globe. The small figure of his mother had been completely busted off, and the upper half of his father's was missing as well. Lex sat down on the ground, just out of reach of the puddle of water and the sea of glass, rotating the broken globe in his hands. He then placed the heavy base down beside him and began to search for the missing pieces of his mother and father. He found the upper half of his father first, which he carefully picked up and placed within the pieces of glass still branching up from the broken base. Then he found the figure of his mother. But when he reached up to pick her up, he flinched back as a shard of glass pierced his finger.
Lex watched the small droplets of blood well up then trickle down his slim finger. Fascinated, he picked up one of the larger pieces of glass and deepened the cut. And a thought occurred to him, as he watched the blood stream down his hand and puddle on the floor. It would be so easy. All it would take would be two swift cuts. No one would know. They wouldn't come looking for him until morning, and by that time it would be hours too late. He eyed the sharp glass in his hand as he slowly turned over his left hand and exposed his wrist. But as he looked down, prepared to make the cut, he saw the face of Napoleon starring up at him. Appalled by what he had almost done, Lex dropped the piece of glass, hurriedly pushed himself off the floor, and backed up to his bed. He let himself fall onto the soft mattress, and sat there, starring at disarray across the room.
Lex gasped as he felt himself fall off his bed, hitting the ground with a yelp of surprise and a loud thud. He groaned as he rolled over and looked up at his ceiling. He didn't remember falling asleep, but he figured it must have been shortly after he broke the snow globe. He pushed himself into a sitting position then rubbed his hands across his face and head. He glanced up at the clock on his nightstand, which read 2:00 am. Stifling a yawn, he stood up and surveyed the mess. It hadn't changed much since he had last looked at it, but it did appear that the floor had soaked up some of the water. Lex just hoped that it didn't damage the floor or the ceiling beneath him, or his grandfather would be pissed.
He quickly snuck out of his room, carefully dodging the pieces of glass, and made his way down the bathroom. He grabbed a couple of towels then made his way back to the room. Before soaking up the water, Lex picked up the figure of his mother, placed it within the broken globe then placed the globe back on his nightstand. He then mopped up the water and glass with the towels. When he was finished he shook out the towels over his garbage can then tossed them in the hamper. That finished, he quickly changed into his pajamas then headed downstairs to the kitchen.
Lex flipped on the light in the kitchen and headed over to the refrigerator. He wasn't the least bit hunger, but he didn't want to just sit there at the table either. He spotted a bowl of grapes setting towards the back and pulled them out. He then sat down at the table and just kind of starred at the bowl of fruit.
"I didn't realize fruit was so fascinating." Emma Luthor remarked as she entered the kitchen and sat across from her grandson at the table.
Lex shrugged his shoulders. "I was just thinking." He told her.
Emma nodded her head. There really wasn't any need to ask what about, she was pretty sure that she already knew. She reached over and snapped off a small bunch of grapes and ate then silently, waiting for Lex to tell her whatever was on his mind. And after a few minutes he did.
"James told me I should be over it by now." Lex told her. "And I thought I was, moving on I mean, especially after school started. But.around Thanksgiving, I started getting really depressed." Lex let out a small humorless laugh. "We didn't even really celebrate Thanksgiving. But I just couldn't stop thinking about her. And I haven't been able to stop since."
Emma frowned. "Have you spoken to your father?" She asked.
Lex scoffed. "No. I can't talk to him. He doesn't listen to me. And besides, I don't think he would understand anyway."
"Alexander! Now, I know you father isn't the warmest of individuals, but he did love your mother. Therefore, he is feeling the same lose that you are." Emma informed him.
"Yeah, well, unlike my father I can't replace my mother by inviting a million different women into my bed." Lex shot back.
Emma sighed as she looked at her grandson. "No, I suppose not. I'm sorry, Lex, I didn't realize he was doing that." She knew that her thirty-one year old son had every right to sleep with whomever he pleased. But she didn't much like the idea of him parading a million different woman of in front of her thirteen-year-old grandson.
"It's alright, Grandma. After all, he should be allowed to move on with his life shouldn't he?" Lex asked.
"Of course he should, Lex. But so should you." Emma replied, giving him a small smile.
"Well, I'm going to go back to bed." Lex told her after a moment of silence.
"Alright." Emma said. Sensing that Lex still needed to get something off his chest, she followed him up the stairs to his room.
"Grandma, what are you doing?" Lex asked as he started up the stairs.
"I'm coming with you." She told him.
Knowing that he wouldn't be able to convince her otherwise, Lex merely sighed and shook his head. "Whatever." He mumbled, before continuing towards his room. Once there he made his way over to his bed and lay down.
Emma followed Lex into his room and sat down on her edge of his bed. She glanced over at the nightstand and noticed the broken snow globe. "What happened to your snow globe?" She asked him.
"I broke it after a fight with James." He told her. He reached out and picked up the figure of his mother and just looked at it for a minute. He could feel the tears welling up behind his eyes and he took a deep breath. "You know, I never got to say goodbye." He whispered. "I kept looking and looking for a cure, something, anything to allow her to hang on just a little bit longer." He paused around the hitch in his breathing. "But, there was nothing, no miracle cure or operation, and she died. And I wasn't there." At that moment, the tears that he had been holding back since last May started to fall. Lex clutched his pillow tight to his chest. "I didn't get to say goodbye," he repeated. "I didn't get to tell her I loved her one last time. And now I never will."
Emma pulled her grandson into a hug and held on to him as his body shook with his broken sobs. Lex buried his face into the crock of her neck, and let the tears fall. "And it wasn't just mom, but Julian and Pam too. They all just left me. Why did they leave me?" He choked out.
"It's alright, Lex," Emma said as she rubbed circles on his back. "Just let it all out."
So he did. He just held on to his grandmother and let all his grief flow out of him along with his tears. He wasn't sure how long he cried. And he didn't really care, because when the sobs finally stopped he felt better. The loss was still there, but it felt as if a great weight had been lifted off his chest. He finally pulled back from the comfort of his grandmother's arms and wiped his running nose and eyes on his shirtsleeve. He took a few deep, calming breaths then gave his grandma a small smile.
"Do you feel a little better now?" She asked him.
"Yeah, a little." He replied, as he looked down at the red-haired figurine still in his hands. "Does it ever go away?" He asked. "The pain, I mean?"
Emma shook her head. "No, it doesn't. It will fade." She told him. "But it will never be completely gone."
Lex nodded his head in understanding. "I didn't think so." He whispered.
They sat in silence for a minute then Emma said, "How about you try and get some sleep, now?"
Lex rolled his eyes then buried himself underneath his blankets. He reached over and placed the figure on the broken globe base, before turning back to his grandma.
"Do you want me to have the globe fixed?" She asked him.
Lex looked back over at the globe and the jagged glass edges sticking up out of the base. He took in the whole yet detached figure of his mother and the mangled figure of his father. He thought about the events that led to the marred state of the globe and what had almost occurred afterwards. He then turned back to his grandma and shook his head. "No," he told her. "I want to keep it as it is."
Emma frowned. "Alright, if that's what you want." She squeezed his hand then rose off the bed. "Sleep well, Lex."
"Good night, Grandma." He replied. He watched her walk towards the door then called out, "Grandma."
"Yes, Lex?"
"Thank you."
"You're welcome." And with that she left the room, and closed the door behind her.
The following morning flew by as it always did. Lex was surprised when James actually apologized to him. But he quickly recovered from his shock and graciously accepted the gesture. After breakfast, the family held the usual gift exchange. He received the usual clothes and books on history, world domination, and the likes from most of his family. But his grandmother, however, gave him a book of collective poems, something his mother would have owned. He ran his hand over the hardbound book then gave her an appreciative smile.
As Lex bundled up to face the cold December weather, he reflected on what his grandmother had told him. He knew things would never be the same without his mother, but that didn't mean that he had to be miserable. Therefore, it was with newly found hope that Lex Luthor kissed his grandma goodbye, before walking down the front steps of her house, and climbing into the car.
TBC.