TITLE: "Right in Front of Him "
AUTHOR: LilHairyEyeball
FEEDBACK: Gimme gimme. Just be gentle.
SUMMARY: Post-Storyteller ficlet conversation between Xander and Spike.
SPOILERS: Up through Season 7
RATING: Giving it an PG rating, because this ain't slash.
DISCLAIMER: Nobody buys me good presents, so I steal other peoples
---
Spike walked up from the basement to find the house deserted. Well almost, save for a depressed carpenter slouched on the couch with a beer in his hand.
"Oi, shouldn't you be doing the snoopy dance about now? Or whatever it is you do," he said with a gesture of his hands.
Xander's head slowly turned to address the vampire. "You. Of course it's you. Because my day could not suck enough, right now. No pun intended."
"Really wasn't that much of a pun, mate. And the long face? Not what I expected to see after I realized who'd been up to what in my bloody cot, of all places"
At the mention of his bed, Spike saw pain flash across Xander's face, quickly replaced with the anger and hated, reserved especially for him.
"Ah, yes," said Xander, with a tip of his beer, "I will never understand women. You tell them you love them, and they say it's over?"
Spike snorted, and sat in the chair opposite, "Or they tell you, you're not allowed to leave, but they don't actually want you? Women are a species better left a mystery, I think. If we knew what they actually wanted . . ."
"Another apocalypse would arrive. Gotcha."
"So you and Anya, eh? Back together, in dysfunctional bliss? I weep for your children, I swear."
Xander stared Spike in the eye for what seemed like an eternity. So many things to say, crossing his brain, yet none seemed appropriate. He sighed.
"No children. No Anya. No . . .anything. Just my beer, and me, and my ex."
Spike frowned at that news. He wasn't stupid. He knew exactly what had gone on when they were all out of the house.
"Vampire here, yeah? Heightened sense of smell, no matter if you clean the sheets. You did the . . . "
"We did. It's done. It's officially over."
"Oh." Spike wasn't sure what he was supposed to say. Or why Xander felt compelled to spill his guts the way he was. He'd wager the beer was playing a major role. "I'm. . . sorry. I am."
Xander snorted. Of course, pity from the lovesick vampire. He had officially reached the bottom of the barrel.
"Don't be sorry. I'm a swinging bachelor now. No more emotional baggage to tie me down. I've been permitted to move on."
"But you don't want to? I get that. It's not as if I'm working my way through the female populace either, is it?"
"And why not? Leave town, travel the world, and nail whoever or whatever takes your fancy. Buffy doesn't need you here." Ahh, there's the resentment again. Good to see that some things never change.
"Need me? No, she doesn't. The First could get its grubby non-corporeal mitts on me at any time. Want me? Probably not, seeing as how cozy she and the noble Principal have gotten recently. Want me gone? I almost wish she did. Instead, one "stay" command from her, and Spike the puppy is living in a bloody girls dorm, sleeping on a cot that other people use to get lucky."
This earns another stare from Xander with the hint of confusion marring his brow. "She doesn't want you to leave? Not too much of a surprise. We're going to need all the help we can get soon."
Spike shook his head. This boy was too much. No wonder he and the demon bird were still on the outs. He couldn't see what was right in front of him sometimes.
"Not for help, halfwit. For comfort . . . or something. Buggared if I understand what she wants. It's not me, apparently. But she wants me to stay, for her. So I stay, and endure seeing you on a daily basis, because that's what love makes you do."
"Love makes you do the wacky," sighed Xander with another tip of his beer.
Silence reigned for a while, as Xander stared at the coffee table, contemplating his life, and Spike just studied the broken man before him. Finally, Xander spoke.
"She loves me. And I love her, and we still spark. We still connect, and we don't want each other gone. So why can't we just be? Together, like it was supposed to be?"
"Because you left her at the alter, you git. You hurt her in a way most women dread more than anything else. Not only that, but then you asked to date the girl? What were you expecting?"
"But I've changed! Then wasn't the time. Now, I think it might be. The time, that is."
"Well, I'd be bloody sure it is the time, before you start stringing her along again, yeah? You might not be so lucky a second time around. In fact, I'm pretty sure it would end with your bits dropping off, whether it be from wishing or a meat cleaver."
Xander winced. Spike wasn't wrong. "It is the time. I know that now. I've worked through my lovely parental issues, and I want to be with her. So, why doesn't she want to be with me?"
"Well, what did she say when you told her all this?"
Xander stared blankly at the vampire, "Oh God, you haven't even told her all of this, have you? Pillock! Maybe if you talk to the girl, she might have an actual response. Ever think of that?"
Xander slumped forward, with his head in his hands. God, he was such a screw-up, and he was taking advice from Spike, of all people. Sensible advice? He raised his head, to look at his enemy come rival. "You're right. As usual, you get it, and I don't."
"Seems to be the norm, doesn't it. Look. Don't waste any more time. Just go find the girl, and tell her how you really feel. And I mean really. Don't censor your emotions. A serious bird won't put up with a bunch of half- truth bullshit."
Xander stood, passing his half-finished beer to Spike, with a nod of his head. He started for the front door, before stopping one last time.
"This whole, open communication thing with women? You might want to give it a try."
Spike opened his mouth to protest, but Xander stopped him with a wave of his hand.
"Just talk to her? She's not telling us anything, and as much as it chaps my ass to admit, she'll talk to you. She needs to talk to someone, even if it is you. And hey, you might get some of the answers you're looking for, as well."
With that, Xander walked into the night, before Spike dropped the beer on the table. He headed to the porch, where he knew his Slayer would be waiting.
AUTHOR: LilHairyEyeball
FEEDBACK: Gimme gimme. Just be gentle.
SUMMARY: Post-Storyteller ficlet conversation between Xander and Spike.
SPOILERS: Up through Season 7
RATING: Giving it an PG rating, because this ain't slash.
DISCLAIMER: Nobody buys me good presents, so I steal other peoples
---
Spike walked up from the basement to find the house deserted. Well almost, save for a depressed carpenter slouched on the couch with a beer in his hand.
"Oi, shouldn't you be doing the snoopy dance about now? Or whatever it is you do," he said with a gesture of his hands.
Xander's head slowly turned to address the vampire. "You. Of course it's you. Because my day could not suck enough, right now. No pun intended."
"Really wasn't that much of a pun, mate. And the long face? Not what I expected to see after I realized who'd been up to what in my bloody cot, of all places"
At the mention of his bed, Spike saw pain flash across Xander's face, quickly replaced with the anger and hated, reserved especially for him.
"Ah, yes," said Xander, with a tip of his beer, "I will never understand women. You tell them you love them, and they say it's over?"
Spike snorted, and sat in the chair opposite, "Or they tell you, you're not allowed to leave, but they don't actually want you? Women are a species better left a mystery, I think. If we knew what they actually wanted . . ."
"Another apocalypse would arrive. Gotcha."
"So you and Anya, eh? Back together, in dysfunctional bliss? I weep for your children, I swear."
Xander stared Spike in the eye for what seemed like an eternity. So many things to say, crossing his brain, yet none seemed appropriate. He sighed.
"No children. No Anya. No . . .anything. Just my beer, and me, and my ex."
Spike frowned at that news. He wasn't stupid. He knew exactly what had gone on when they were all out of the house.
"Vampire here, yeah? Heightened sense of smell, no matter if you clean the sheets. You did the . . . "
"We did. It's done. It's officially over."
"Oh." Spike wasn't sure what he was supposed to say. Or why Xander felt compelled to spill his guts the way he was. He'd wager the beer was playing a major role. "I'm. . . sorry. I am."
Xander snorted. Of course, pity from the lovesick vampire. He had officially reached the bottom of the barrel.
"Don't be sorry. I'm a swinging bachelor now. No more emotional baggage to tie me down. I've been permitted to move on."
"But you don't want to? I get that. It's not as if I'm working my way through the female populace either, is it?"
"And why not? Leave town, travel the world, and nail whoever or whatever takes your fancy. Buffy doesn't need you here." Ahh, there's the resentment again. Good to see that some things never change.
"Need me? No, she doesn't. The First could get its grubby non-corporeal mitts on me at any time. Want me? Probably not, seeing as how cozy she and the noble Principal have gotten recently. Want me gone? I almost wish she did. Instead, one "stay" command from her, and Spike the puppy is living in a bloody girls dorm, sleeping on a cot that other people use to get lucky."
This earns another stare from Xander with the hint of confusion marring his brow. "She doesn't want you to leave? Not too much of a surprise. We're going to need all the help we can get soon."
Spike shook his head. This boy was too much. No wonder he and the demon bird were still on the outs. He couldn't see what was right in front of him sometimes.
"Not for help, halfwit. For comfort . . . or something. Buggared if I understand what she wants. It's not me, apparently. But she wants me to stay, for her. So I stay, and endure seeing you on a daily basis, because that's what love makes you do."
"Love makes you do the wacky," sighed Xander with another tip of his beer.
Silence reigned for a while, as Xander stared at the coffee table, contemplating his life, and Spike just studied the broken man before him. Finally, Xander spoke.
"She loves me. And I love her, and we still spark. We still connect, and we don't want each other gone. So why can't we just be? Together, like it was supposed to be?"
"Because you left her at the alter, you git. You hurt her in a way most women dread more than anything else. Not only that, but then you asked to date the girl? What were you expecting?"
"But I've changed! Then wasn't the time. Now, I think it might be. The time, that is."
"Well, I'd be bloody sure it is the time, before you start stringing her along again, yeah? You might not be so lucky a second time around. In fact, I'm pretty sure it would end with your bits dropping off, whether it be from wishing or a meat cleaver."
Xander winced. Spike wasn't wrong. "It is the time. I know that now. I've worked through my lovely parental issues, and I want to be with her. So, why doesn't she want to be with me?"
"Well, what did she say when you told her all this?"
Xander stared blankly at the vampire, "Oh God, you haven't even told her all of this, have you? Pillock! Maybe if you talk to the girl, she might have an actual response. Ever think of that?"
Xander slumped forward, with his head in his hands. God, he was such a screw-up, and he was taking advice from Spike, of all people. Sensible advice? He raised his head, to look at his enemy come rival. "You're right. As usual, you get it, and I don't."
"Seems to be the norm, doesn't it. Look. Don't waste any more time. Just go find the girl, and tell her how you really feel. And I mean really. Don't censor your emotions. A serious bird won't put up with a bunch of half- truth bullshit."
Xander stood, passing his half-finished beer to Spike, with a nod of his head. He started for the front door, before stopping one last time.
"This whole, open communication thing with women? You might want to give it a try."
Spike opened his mouth to protest, but Xander stopped him with a wave of his hand.
"Just talk to her? She's not telling us anything, and as much as it chaps my ass to admit, she'll talk to you. She needs to talk to someone, even if it is you. And hey, you might get some of the answers you're looking for, as well."
With that, Xander walked into the night, before Spike dropped the beer on the table. He headed to the porch, where he knew his Slayer would be waiting.