Disclaimer: I do not own Legolas or any other Mary-Sues, nor am I a rabid fangirl. Legolas belongs to J.R.R. Tolkien, and he can keep him for all I care! Now onto more Legolas torture! :)
The last place we left our little rhyme,
Poor little Leggy was having a rough time.
Stuck in a cage with Mary-Sues and rabid fangirlies, too,
Our poor little Leggy had not a clue what to do.
Finding himself truly stuck in a rut,
Leggy desperately tries to save his own butt.
The dark headless boss and his cronies watch with delight
As Legolas puts up an utterly hopeless fight.
Fear evident in his eyes, Leggy lets out his last, final cry,
As two of the boss's cronies, Zep and Sungirl, shout, "Die, Legolas, die!"
And die he does in true Leggy style.
"Heehee…I'm dying", he says with a smile,
His body falling into a deep compost pile.
Leggy's death comes not a moment too soon
As the bell chimes twelve indicating the time is high noon.
"Come, my cronies", beckons the boss, calling them out to lunch.
"Let's all celebrate his death together by having us a good munch."
"But what about all the Mary-Sues and his fangirlies, too?"
The background fills with cries of, "Oh, boo-hoo, whatever are we to do?"
"Well, I reckon the fangirls have suffered enough,
For watching their God die must have been a torture real tough.
The Mary-Sues, however, aren't going to get off so light.
We'll think up a great plan as we all eat our lunches, alright?"
Off to lunch, soon each departs,
Wicked laughter filling their hearts.
Evil smiles abound as they replay in their minds the death of Leggy the slime
And as they think about the deaths of all Mary-Sues coming up in no time.
A/N: Thanks, everybody, for reading, and an extra thanks to everyone who reviews! :) "Die, Legolas, Die!" is Sungirl's quote. Thank you, Sungirl! Also, Zep requested to be involved in killing Legolas and so I put her in the rhyme. I hope that made you very happy, Zep! :) Now onto my replies to all the other reviewers, whom I love so much! :)
Elentari Manwe: Aawww…really? I actually thought my rhyming scheme was really bad, so I was really happy when I read your review. Thank you so much! :)
Sil-Gathien: Aawww…well, thanks for complimenting my rhyme even if you're a Legolas fan. But really, just cuz you are a fan of his, doesn't mean you gotta hate this. And, um, I definitely won't be insulting Gimli cuz I think he's really funny and cool. I'm sorry. Thanks a lot for the review! I really appreciate it! :)
Silver-fanged-dragon: Legolas, innocent? I don't think so! He is most definitely guilty…of being a stupid moronic slimeball, that is! BWAA-HA-HA-HA-HA!!! Many thanks for your review, though! :)
Not a lego fan: I completely agree with you! Down with all Mary-Sues and rabid fangirlies, too!!! Hehe :) Thanks for reviewing and sharing your opinion with me. Us lego-hype hatahs must stick togethah, man! Foh-evah! :)
Dianne: Well, if you're allowed to love him, then I should be allowed to hate him, right? Unless you were just joking in your review…can't really tell. Hehe :) Thanks for reviewing, though! Reviews make me happy! :)
Morkeleb: Oh, I definitely hate how Legolas is portrayed in the movie. I don't really know how I feel about Orlando Bloom since I've never seen any other movies with him in it. I just hate how Legolas has to be blonde and how girls drool over him and all that. Quite annoying, if you ask me. Hope you're satisfied by my answer. Thanks for your review. ^_^
Ayawen Evenstar: Many thanks for your review! I am evil, aren't I? Hehe :) Yes, Leggy can still be your precious. It's just that now he's your DEAD precious. BWAA-HA-HA-HA-HA!!!
Enigma Jade: Twisted Dr. Seuss book, eh? My, what a great idea! Thanks a bunch, man! Hehe :) Well, I'm really glad you enjoyed it, and I hope you enjoyed this portion as well! :) I appreciate your reviews a lot! :)
Anonymous1: Awesome, eh? Well, mucho thanks for your review! Yes, I like my fics being called awesome! And you're awesome for saying so! :)
Anonymous2: You hated it? Awww…I'm so sad…NOT!!! Hehe :) Yes, flames make me happy, although not as happy as non-flames do. So thanks for the review! :)
Anonymous3: Are you the same as anonymous2? I'm not sure. But if you'd like to know my reply, look above. Also, it's not even a story. It's a rhyme…okay, well, I guess it could be thought of as a story within a rhyme or something like that, but still… Hehe :) Your review is appreciated! :)
Jcfgjhc: I'm sorry, but your comment is really low. I mean, what does the WTC have to do with anything?! You're very insensitive. Nevertheless, I thank you for reviewing! :)
Sungirl: I hope you don't mind me mentioning you in my rhyme. It's just that it was your quote, so I felt that I needed to credit you. Thanks a lot for reviewing (and for the quote)! :)
Zee: Other characters, eh? Hmm…I could, except I don't want to insult any of them. You don't want me to insult any of them, do you? Well, I mean, maybe some little teasing, but definitely nothing like this one. It could be fun, though…I'll think about it. I'm really glad you love my rhyme! And thank you so much for reviewing! :)
Mercuria: Hmm…a twisted Dr. Seuss book AND a nursery rhyme from hell? Yessss, me likes!!! Hehe :) Mucho thanks for your review! :)
Luinil Lightsong: Well, of course being a hater is not nice. I mean, hello…I am evil! It may not be nice, but it is a whole lotta fun! Hehe :) Thanks so much for reviewing! :)
Aragorn Lover: Yes, you have e-mailed me, and I shall reply to your e-mail very soon! :) But unfortunately, this is the last of Legolas you'll see in this rhyme. Maybe I'll do another fic where he dies, though, eh? Hehe :) By the way, I love Aragorn, too! He's the best! :) Many thanks for reading and reviewing! Gotta love the reviewers, right? :)
Legolas Lover: Oh, that was so harsh. Made me want to cry. Yeah, right! It actually made me laugh…a lot! Yes, me do like flames a lot! So thanks a lot for reviewing! :)