The Nanny Diaries
Chapter One: 15 Seconds of Fame
Hi everybody! Hope you enjoy my story, it's the first one I've written and there will be plenty more to come! Read and Review soon! Thanks!
Disclaimer: Most of these characters are original characters from the novel The Nanny Diaries, but some of them are new ones that I created.
Ever since I graduated from NYU last spring and left the Xes, I haven't really decided what I want to do with my life. It's just an endless cycle of interviews with ridiculously wealthy mothers who want me to do the job of raising their children until about the age of 8, so they can get their nails done every Monday afternoon, go shopping on Tuesdays, Wednesday, and Thursdays, and relax from all the hard work on Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays. Fortunately for them, they can eventually boot their kids out of the house and pack them off to a prestigious boarding school somewhere in Scotland. That way, Mom can get her nails done on Thursdays, too.
As I sit in my one-bedroom studio apartment on the 15th floor with my dog, Grace, asleep beside me, I think about all the events of the past few years at the Xes. I wonder what Grayer is doing right now…. Well, most likely at his preschool being forced to eat gourmet tofu imported from Indonesia. I miss Grayer. I don't know what I would do without kids in my life. But I don't think I could go back to being a nanny. "Let's go, Grace," I say, as I pick up her leash and walk out the door.
On my way to the Parents League, where desperate nannies can post their advertisements on the public bulletin board, I stop to grab a bite to eat. When I get there, I see the familiar face of the young woman who helped me find a job only a few months ago. "Hi again," I say to her cheerfully. "Can I put up my advertisement?" She directs me to the left, where I see three other nannies posting their slightly "adjusted" resumes on the bulletin board. As I walk closer, I notice that I can't even see the ad that I placed only 2 months ago on the very same board. Oh, there it is! Buried underneath a pile of about ten other resumes, I see my own handwriting and tear up the old slip. Putting my new resume on top, I see an ad that catches my eye.
Married Mothers is hosting a new television talk show at News 8 StudiosProfessional & experienced nanny needed for the show
Preferably with a degree
Excellent references desired
Reasonable hours, excellent pay
Meet at News 8 Studios on Saturday, September 17, at 2 pm
Wow! My own TV show. I can just envision the fame. Maybe they would interview me on Good Morning America…. Let's have a round of applause for the world-famous Nanny, from TV's most popular show, Nanny the nanny! Nanny, how does it feel to be the most famous nanny in the world? "Excuse me. EXCUSE ME!" Huh? "Oh! I'm so sorry," I say, realizing that I've been standing in front of the bulletin board for 15 minutes envisioning my future as a TV star. Grace starts to nip at my ankles, so I decide to leave. On my way out, I quickly grab the ad, mostly so the other nannies in line won't see it, and run out the door with Grace slobbering on my shoes.
Ding-dong. The door opens with a curly blond-haired girl behind it, and a wide grin spreads across her face. "Nanny! What's up?" she asks. "I just found the most exciting ad at the Parents League! You won't believe it. Now I don't have to go crawling back to Mrs. X for a job, and this one's even better—I'll be on tv!" I say, jumbling it all into one long sentence. "Whoa, really? Let me read this," Jill says. Jill is my neighbor and best friend since high school. She refuses to have anything to do with kids, so she works in the financial world with bank accounts and trust funds. Could it be any more boring?. Anyway, we both spend our time dealing with other people's money in some way or another. Jill manages their accounts, and I manage their lives, because they have too much money to manage their own lives themselves, children included. "This sounds great. But what's Married Mothers?" she asks me, raising her brow. "Oh, it's that organization of mothers from the preschool down the street from Grayer's, that puts out Proper Childcare for Proper Mothers magazine every month. It basically tells you how make sure that your 2 year-old son won't touch your curls after you get your hair done, and how to threaten him if he does," I reply. She laughs. "Anyway," I continue, "despite their obvious snootiness, they're actually pretty successful women who have chosen good nannies for their own homes. I'm so excited for this interview because this show might actually be a hit! I mean, a nanny advice talk show? Who wouldn't watch it!" I say ecstatically. "I don't know. It sounds a little weird that they would want a nanny on their show, which is about mothers, not nannies," she replies skeptically. "No, no, don't worry, this is going to be a great opportunity. Oh, I gotta run now, I promised my mom that I would have lunch with her at 1. Bye!"
I wake up on Saturday morning feeling refreshed and invigorated. Not to mention a tad bit excited. Okay, a little more than a tad. I'M GOING TO BE ON TV! I can't believe this. If they like me, (which they have to, right?) I could have my own show, plus I'll be doing what I love most- working with, or at least solving problems about, kids. After an extra large cup of caffeinated coffee, I head over to the studio on the subway. When I get there, the place looks like a zoo of desperate nannies and wealthy New York mothers scrambling to find everything needed for the interviews. Meanwhile, the rest of the crew at News 8 Studios is frantically trying to get ready for the upcoming News Break at 9. I walk over 3 layers of black wires connected to all sorts of cameras and television monitors to get to the ticket machine, only to pick the number 28. Oh crap. There are 27 other nannies here! And only one is going to make it on the show! I look over at another nanny, middle-aged, with salt and pepper hair and a dark corduroy skirt on, who looks like she feels the same as I do. "Well, I guess the only thing we can do is wait for our number to be called," I say encouragingly, trying to make small talk with the woman. "Yeah," she says. "I'm Annie," she continues, putting out her hand. We shake hands and laugh a little. "Hi, I'm Nanny." "That rhymes!" she exclaims. Haha. So there began my rhyming-name friendship with Annie so-and–so.
"NUMBER TWENTY EIIIIIIIIGHT!" a loud voice calls out. "Oh! That's me," I say to Annie while stepping over the wires. "Good luck," she says, smiling wholeheartedly. After a series of random, irrelevant questions, and a few questionably good ones, the interview is over. That's it. Six questions and it's over. Well, 2 hours later, I hear good news over the intercom: "We'd like to thank all of the nannies applying for this job and for coming out today. However, we ask that Annie, Caroline, Margaret, and Nanny please stay for the second part of the interview. Again, thank you everyone." YES! That's me, I'm going to be famous. "Hello, ladies," an elderly woman, presumably the president of Married Mothers, says as she amiably greets us. "After some further discussion, we've decided that a second interview is not necessary at all." Huh? Are we fired already? "We clearly need four nannies on this set, and you ladies are the lucky four! Now come along this way, please, so I can show you the guidelines for being the new nannies here, and a list of expectations as well. Oh, and by the way, we expect that you'll be working from 8 am- 7 pm starting tomorrow, 6 days a week, no excuses. And if you aren't comfortable with dirty diapers, you can simply leave right now."
Oh my God. OH MY GOD. "Jillllllll! Jill, I can't believe this! The ad was for a nanny on the set- to babysit the Married Mothers' children while they host their TV show! This is absolutely ridiculous! 27 other women came to apply for this job actually knowing that they would just be changing the diapers of some demanding lady that wants to prance around on national television? I can't believe I was fooled into thinking that I would be the one on TV! And "reasonable hours?!" 8-7 is not reasonable!" I cried. Soon the tears started flowing and I was sobbing on Jill's kitchen floor. A dirty kitchen floor, at that. "Sweetie, it's alright. This is the kind of job you've had and wanted all your life- being a real nanny! You're experienced and know what you're doing. Do you really think that doing an advice section would have been that great in the first place? This is hands-on working with kids, not just telling some prissy mother how to do it herself." Jill replied. "You're so right, Jill. I've got to get my act together. I'm going back down to the Parents League so I can see if anyone took my ad yet. I'll try to grab some more that interest me, too." "Oh, and Nanny?" she asks quickly. "Yeah?" I say. "Get me a sandwich while you're down there, will you? And hold the mayo."