Chapter 20 *Finding Comfort in Love*
Hermione sighed as she watched Melanie furrow her brow in concentration. Though Hermione had gone over the Potion's lesson over and over again, the young student just didn't seem to be getting it.
Even though it was Christmas, Hermione couldn't turn down McGonagall when the older witch had asked her to tutor Melanie; besides someone needed her help. Hermione wished she had gone with Harry to the headmaster's office, though. And now as the hour went by, she was beginning to feel uneasy. She had a bad feeling that what Dumbledore had to tell Harry was not the best of news.
"Hermione?"
A small voice pulled Hermione out of her thoughts. She switched her gaze on the girl's face, who's hazel eyes were wide with concern. "Yes, Melanie?" she answered, blinking rapidly, and messaging her temples with her fingertips, trying to get rid of the pounding headache that was forming.
"Are you okay? You were zoning out on me there for a moment," she asked, nervously.
Hermione smiled at her warmly. "I'm fine. Just got lost in my thoughts," Hermione said, truthfully. She bit her lip as she saw Melanie shrug and go back to her essay; that feeling was beginning to grow by the minute. "You know what? How about you study some more and we'll continue this later, okay?"
Melanie looked up from her homework as Hermione was getting out of her seat. "Um, sure. That sounds good. When do you ..." but she didn't get to finish her sentence because Hermione was already out the door, mumbling a brief good-bye.
Melanie sighed and sat back down, glaring at her open Potion's book. She despised that class.
* * *
"Hermione!"
She was hurrying down the hall towards the Gryffindor Tower when Hermione heard a familiar female voice. She stopped to turn, waiting impatiently as she watched a panting Parvati run up to her. "What is it?" she asked, more coldly then she had anticipated.
"It's Harry. He's in the common room in some sort of trance. He's been sitting by the fire for no more than an hour crying and won't talk to anyone," Parvati said in a rush, trying to keep up with Hermione who had broke out into a run as soon as she had heard Harry's name.
The two girls reached the portrait hole red faced and panting. When the Fat Lady saw them she shook her head sadly. "Take care of him, dear," she told Hermione before letting them in.
It seemed as if all the students of Hogwarts were crowded into the Gryffindor Common Room, all hovering around Harry, trying to catch a glimpse of The-Boy-Who-Lived crying. Hermione pushed passed the bewildered students, shouting at them to back away. She finally reached Harry and her heart squeezed together tightly at the sight.
She kneeled down next to him, wrapping her arms around his freezing body, despite the blazing fire. "Harry? Love, can you hear me?" Hermione asked him.
Harry turned away from the fire to look at the person who was speaking to him. When he saw who it was, his beautiful eyes filled with tears and he fell forward into Hermione's arms. "'Mione ... " he choked out, sobs racking his body.
Hermione held him tighter, fear ripping through her body. She had never seen him like this. She helped him to his feet and faced the small crowd. "All of you go back to your dormitories! There's nothing to see. Move! Now! Don't make me deduct points from my own house!" she told them, fiercely. The crowd dispersed quickly, each of them having no doubt that Hermione would take points away from her own house.
As she ushered Harry towards their private common room, some of their friends sent concerned looks her way. Hermione forced a small smile to her lips, for their sake. She pushed open the door and they stumbled in, Hermione leading Harry towards their bedroom. "Sit down, love," she told him, keeping her arms tightly secured around him. "What happened?"
He looked at her with so much pain, it brought tears to her eyes; he looked so lost. "Sirius ..." Harry started but stopped. Tears spilled from his eyes and he buried his face in Hermione's chest. She pulled him closer to her. "Sirius what?" she asked, gently.
"Sirius ... is ... is ... d-dead!" Harry's muffled reply came as a sob.
"Oh no ..." Hermione's heart felt as if it had stopped beating. Maybe she had heard wrong. "Wh-what?"
Instead of answering, Harry pushed away from Hermione and went over to the window.
Her tears fell down her cheeks, silently. She stood up and went over to Harry. Hermione didn't know what to say to make his pain go away and she didn't think there was anything she could say.
Her blood began to boil with anger. Why was life so unfair? All his life, Harry had known pain. From the death of his parents, being abused by the Dursleys, Cedric Diggory's death, and now Sirius. Harry was the only person Hermione thought deserved everything good that life had to offer, yet everything bad always came his way.
"Why?" came a demand.
Hermione looked up to see Harry's intense green eyes focused on her. The question that was running over and over in her head, echoed in the silent room. She could only shake her head and open her arms to him.
Instead of going into her embrace, he backed away. His eyes glistened with tears that didn't seem to want to stop and the lump in his throat was beginning to get painful. Harry walked away from her, fear making it's way to his mind. Voldemort had already killed four people he had known. Two he never got the chance to love, one he had only started to befriend, and the other he had considered a father. What if Voldemort decided to go after Hermione or Ron? He wouldn't be able to live with himself, let alone without his two best friends. What was he thinking proposing to her like that? If Voldemort found out he would surely come after her.
"Harry ... ?" her soft voice pulled him out of his disturbed thoughts. He turned around to face her and his heart squeezed painfully against his chest. He didn't deserve to have the love of the most wonderful person in the world.
"I'm-I'm so sorry ..." she said, softly. Tears were streaming down her face and her cinnamon brown eyes reflected his own pain. She took a couple of steps towards him but he backed away again, hands held out in front of him.
"No, Hermione. Don't ..."
Hermione stopped and looked at him, confused. "Don't what?" she asked, hurt.
Don't look at me like that! Harry cried inside his head. He had to protect her and the only way to do that was to keep her away from him; but he wouldn't be able to do that if she kept looking at him like that. "I don't want something happening to you or Ron," he told her, forcing himself to stay where he was and not bury his face in her hair and cry his eyes out.
"Nothing will happen to me or Ron. This isn't your fault, Harry."
"Yes, it is!" he shouted, causing Hermione to jump back in alarm. "It's been my fault since the day I was born! My parents died trying to protect me, I suggested that Cedric and I should take the cup together, and Sirius would be alive if it weren't for me!" he cried, his breaths coming out rapidly and his eyes blazing.
Hermione took two tentative steps forward. It still scared her whenever someone shouted at her; an image of Anthony floated through her mind. But Harry was not Anthony and never would be. She had to stop letting the memories of Anthony control her.
"It's not your fault. You can't drown yourself with guilt every time something bad happens," she told him, walking closer. "You're parents don't blame you for their death, neither do Cedric or Sirius," she took his hands in hers and was relieved when he didn't make an attempt to remove them.
"How do you know?" he asked in a choked whisper. He was losing this battle.
"Because I know the person you are," Hermione placed one hand on his chest, feeling his heart beating rapidly against her palm. "You have one of the biggest hearts in the world and everyone thinks so. You're parents would be so proud of you and it shows in the letter your father wrote you. Sirius always considered you a son and you would have thought you were his son the way he would always talk about you!" she placed both her hands on the sides of his face, trying to get through to him. "Ron is proud of you and so am I."
Harry shook his head. He took her left hand in his own and stared at the ring he had given her. "I don't want anything happening to you. Maybe we shouldn't ..." Harry wanted to tell her to leave him, to find someone else who could give her a normal life. It would be painful to let her go but at least he knew she would be safe from harm.
"Don't you dare tell me to leave you, Harry James Potter!" Hermione cried, reading his thoughts once again. "Don't you get it? I love you so much it hurts! I would go to hell and back for you. When you asked me to marry you, I said yes because I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want us to start a life together, a family. You and me, Harry. Not me and someone else. No matter how much you push me away, I will always be by your side. As corny as it sounds, we are meant to be. Don't you see it?" sy now she had stepped a few feet back. Tears were rolling down her cheeks but she spoke firmly. But this last phrase came in an almost desperate whisper. "I love you, Harry. More than you'll ever know."
Harry stared at her for a moment before closing the distance between them. He took her tightly into his arms and buried his face in her hair. They didn't speak; no words were necessary.
* * *
Hermione yawned and opened her eyes. She slowly slid her arms from around Harry, careful not to wake him. As she stood up, she heard her stomach give a small growl. It was almost dinnertime and she was starved.
She kissed Harry on the forehead before tip toeing out of the room. As she appeared in the Gryffindor Common Room she was glad everyone was in the Great Hall. She wasn't in the mood for questions.
She made her way down the hallway and into the Great Hall. Though most of the kids were home for the holidays, the hall was still buzzing with excited chatter of Christmas gifts and mistletoe.
"Hey, Granger," she heard a familiar drawl as she took her seat at one of the long tables.
"Hi, Malfoy," Hermione replied as Draco took a seat across form her and gave her something that resembled a small smile.
Though Draco was on good terms with the trio, they had insisted on sticking with the last name basis.
"How is he?" Draco asked, spooning some noodle soup onto his bowl. His tone was serious and Hermione detected sorrow in his gray eyes. As she watched him eat, she couldn't figure out how Ginny had changed him so drastically.
"He's still sad and angry, of course, but he'll be fine. Could you tell me what happened?" Hermione asked, taking a bite of chicken.
"You don't know?" Draco asked her, surprised.
She shook her head and leaned forward, her food forgotten. "Tell me."
He took a deep breath and sighed. "Okay ..." then he launched into the story that brought tears to her eyes.
* * *
"Enough, Voldemort!" Sirius cried, pointing his wand to the retreating figure.
Voldemort turned around and laughed at them. "Enough?" he repeated, amusement evident in his voice. "And who are you two to tell me to stop?"
Sirius sneered at the Dark Lord, taking a step forward. Hagrid placed an oversized hand on his arm. "Don't let 'em get to ya." the giant told him, his own blood boiling with rage.
"Yes, the overgrown git is right. Don't let me get to you. Just go about your own business as I go about mine. Good day to you," Voldemort sneered and proceeded to walk away.
"Avada Kedavra!" Sirius cried, shocked when the spell seemed to bounce off Voldemort's back.
"Tsk, tsk. Do you actually think you can destroy me? Not even Potter can do that," he turned to face them, wand held out in front of him. "I will fight you, Black, but I really don't have a use for that great lug behind you. Avada Kedavra," he said, nonchalantly.
Seeing the green stream of light head for Hagrid, Sirius let out an angry cry, diving in front of his long time friend. The beam hit him so hard he fell back, sending Hagrid and himself flying to the ground several feet away from where they had been standing.
"No!" Hagrid cried, placing Sirius gently on the ground. "You'll pay fer this! One way or another," he told Voldemort.
"I'm sure I will. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have things to do, places to go, and people to see. Ta ta," with that, he gave Hagrid one more evil grin and disappeared in a cloud of smoke.
"Hagrid ..." Sirius whispered, his strength was wasting away drastically. He was shocked that he was still alive. "Tell Harry ..."
"No, you can tell 'Arry," Hagrid said, a large tear dripping off his chin. " I'm so 'orry, Sirius. It's all my fault ..."
"No, it's not Hagrid. Listen to me. Go to Dumbledore and tell him what happened. Then tell Harry I'm so sorry for letting him down. I didn't mean to break my promise. Tell him I love him and no matter what happens that good can overcome evil. Tell him that," he was taking short gasps of breath.
"But ..."
"Tell him!" Sirius cried, shutting his eyes and trying to shut out all the pain that was searing through his body.
"I will. I'll 'lways love you like a brother, Sirius," Hagrid told him, taking him into his massive arms.
"Me too, Hagrid. Always remember me," with that, his body became limp and his eyes shut. Hagrid would never forget the peaceful smile that Sirius was wearing when he died.
* * *
Hermione swiped at her tears, her head shaking from side to side. "Oh my ..." she mumbled, looking at Draco wide-eyed.
Draco blinked several times, not wanting Hermione to see him cry. He placed an arm around her shoulder, cursing Voldemort to the depths of the underworld.
"I-I should go," Hermione broke the silence as students began to stroll out of the Great Hall. Draco just nodded and helped her up.
"Tell Harry I'm so sorry and if there's anything I can do to tell me," Draco told her, giving her a small hug before walking away.
Hermione nodded to herself, mutely. She grabbed some food for Harry and walked out of the now empty hall, her mind and heart numb from pain.
* * *
Harry's eyes flew open, his heart beating rapidly. He removed his arms from around Hermione gently, not wanting to wake her up, and got out of bed. He paced across the room, trying to forget the nightmare that had woken him up.
"It was just a dream ..." he told himself, thankful that at least his scar wasn't hurting.
He went over to the window seat and sat down, opening the window an inch, feeling better when a blast of cold air cooled the sweat from his face. Harry stood up again and retrieved the 'memories' book that Hermione had gave him for Christmas.
With his heart beating and Hagrid's words floating through his head, he opened to Sirius' page. His heart caught in his throat as he recognized Sirius' small scrawl. Taking a deep breath he began to read.
Harry:
Hello, Son, how are you? I must say that this idea of Hermione's was a good one (like all her other ideas). You've caught yourself a good one, Harry, never let her go.
I'm sitting here wondering how to put all my thoughts about you on one piece of paper, and it's hard. I think I might need a large book to fill it up with all the incredible words that I would use to describe you. Well, I guess I'll just have to improvise.
First of all, you are the son I never had. Your parents would be so proud of you, Harry. I know I am. You've grown up to be such an incredible person, inside and out. No matter how hard life gets, you always have something to throw back at it. Nothing can discourage you, and that's what I love about you. Your confident, loyal, and so kind hearted. Not to mention that your a hunk (Harry shook his head, here. A smile lighting up his face). Don't you shake your head at me! I'm telling you the truth -- just ask your fiance.
I know I could never replace you father's spot but I hope I helped you in any way I could. I know I'm not going to live forever and I might not even make it to your wedding day, but I will always be here when you need me, I'll always be behind you (unless of course, you make Hermione mad. Then your on your own). No matter where I am, you can always talk to me.
And Harry? I tried so hard to protect you and your parents. Please believe me. They were my family and I loved them with all my heart. I will never forgive myself but I will die easier knowing that their son forgives me.
Well, I'm blubbering all over the paper and smearing it. Hermione will have a fit at my sloppiness. Always remember who your real friends and family are and stop feeling guilty for things that have gone wrong. You of all people deserve the best in life, so you go out there and kick their butts, kid. I love you always.
Love Always, Your Godfather Sirius
Harry wiped away the tears that were rolling down his face and for the first time since hearing that his Godfather had died, a smile lit his face. His heart didn't feel so heavy anymore and he actually felt peaceful. He knew Sirius was in a much happier place and that he was reunited with his two best friends.
"I forgive you, Sirius ... " Harry whispered, having forgiven him many years ago.
Author's Note: Finally done!!! I'm so sorry this chapter took me so long (I say that every time, don't I?) but I was having problems with the Hagrid and Sirius part -- which is why it's so retarded. I know it sounds unrealistic but I ran out of ideas! So I apologize for that scene. Also, I know many of you guys are mad at me for killing Sirius, I'm sorry but he's really dead -- no coming back to life. Sorry! And this whole chapter happened in one day. Meaning it was still Christmas Day. The next chapter will be Sirius' funeral so stay tuned for that.
A billion thanks to all my reviewers! Luv ya. (oh, and don't forget to review!!)
Sweetie
Hermione sighed as she watched Melanie furrow her brow in concentration. Though Hermione had gone over the Potion's lesson over and over again, the young student just didn't seem to be getting it.
Even though it was Christmas, Hermione couldn't turn down McGonagall when the older witch had asked her to tutor Melanie; besides someone needed her help. Hermione wished she had gone with Harry to the headmaster's office, though. And now as the hour went by, she was beginning to feel uneasy. She had a bad feeling that what Dumbledore had to tell Harry was not the best of news.
"Hermione?"
A small voice pulled Hermione out of her thoughts. She switched her gaze on the girl's face, who's hazel eyes were wide with concern. "Yes, Melanie?" she answered, blinking rapidly, and messaging her temples with her fingertips, trying to get rid of the pounding headache that was forming.
"Are you okay? You were zoning out on me there for a moment," she asked, nervously.
Hermione smiled at her warmly. "I'm fine. Just got lost in my thoughts," Hermione said, truthfully. She bit her lip as she saw Melanie shrug and go back to her essay; that feeling was beginning to grow by the minute. "You know what? How about you study some more and we'll continue this later, okay?"
Melanie looked up from her homework as Hermione was getting out of her seat. "Um, sure. That sounds good. When do you ..." but she didn't get to finish her sentence because Hermione was already out the door, mumbling a brief good-bye.
Melanie sighed and sat back down, glaring at her open Potion's book. She despised that class.
* * *
"Hermione!"
She was hurrying down the hall towards the Gryffindor Tower when Hermione heard a familiar female voice. She stopped to turn, waiting impatiently as she watched a panting Parvati run up to her. "What is it?" she asked, more coldly then she had anticipated.
"It's Harry. He's in the common room in some sort of trance. He's been sitting by the fire for no more than an hour crying and won't talk to anyone," Parvati said in a rush, trying to keep up with Hermione who had broke out into a run as soon as she had heard Harry's name.
The two girls reached the portrait hole red faced and panting. When the Fat Lady saw them she shook her head sadly. "Take care of him, dear," she told Hermione before letting them in.
It seemed as if all the students of Hogwarts were crowded into the Gryffindor Common Room, all hovering around Harry, trying to catch a glimpse of The-Boy-Who-Lived crying. Hermione pushed passed the bewildered students, shouting at them to back away. She finally reached Harry and her heart squeezed together tightly at the sight.
She kneeled down next to him, wrapping her arms around his freezing body, despite the blazing fire. "Harry? Love, can you hear me?" Hermione asked him.
Harry turned away from the fire to look at the person who was speaking to him. When he saw who it was, his beautiful eyes filled with tears and he fell forward into Hermione's arms. "'Mione ... " he choked out, sobs racking his body.
Hermione held him tighter, fear ripping through her body. She had never seen him like this. She helped him to his feet and faced the small crowd. "All of you go back to your dormitories! There's nothing to see. Move! Now! Don't make me deduct points from my own house!" she told them, fiercely. The crowd dispersed quickly, each of them having no doubt that Hermione would take points away from her own house.
As she ushered Harry towards their private common room, some of their friends sent concerned looks her way. Hermione forced a small smile to her lips, for their sake. She pushed open the door and they stumbled in, Hermione leading Harry towards their bedroom. "Sit down, love," she told him, keeping her arms tightly secured around him. "What happened?"
He looked at her with so much pain, it brought tears to her eyes; he looked so lost. "Sirius ..." Harry started but stopped. Tears spilled from his eyes and he buried his face in Hermione's chest. She pulled him closer to her. "Sirius what?" she asked, gently.
"Sirius ... is ... is ... d-dead!" Harry's muffled reply came as a sob.
"Oh no ..." Hermione's heart felt as if it had stopped beating. Maybe she had heard wrong. "Wh-what?"
Instead of answering, Harry pushed away from Hermione and went over to the window.
Her tears fell down her cheeks, silently. She stood up and went over to Harry. Hermione didn't know what to say to make his pain go away and she didn't think there was anything she could say.
Her blood began to boil with anger. Why was life so unfair? All his life, Harry had known pain. From the death of his parents, being abused by the Dursleys, Cedric Diggory's death, and now Sirius. Harry was the only person Hermione thought deserved everything good that life had to offer, yet everything bad always came his way.
"Why?" came a demand.
Hermione looked up to see Harry's intense green eyes focused on her. The question that was running over and over in her head, echoed in the silent room. She could only shake her head and open her arms to him.
Instead of going into her embrace, he backed away. His eyes glistened with tears that didn't seem to want to stop and the lump in his throat was beginning to get painful. Harry walked away from her, fear making it's way to his mind. Voldemort had already killed four people he had known. Two he never got the chance to love, one he had only started to befriend, and the other he had considered a father. What if Voldemort decided to go after Hermione or Ron? He wouldn't be able to live with himself, let alone without his two best friends. What was he thinking proposing to her like that? If Voldemort found out he would surely come after her.
"Harry ... ?" her soft voice pulled him out of his disturbed thoughts. He turned around to face her and his heart squeezed painfully against his chest. He didn't deserve to have the love of the most wonderful person in the world.
"I'm-I'm so sorry ..." she said, softly. Tears were streaming down her face and her cinnamon brown eyes reflected his own pain. She took a couple of steps towards him but he backed away again, hands held out in front of him.
"No, Hermione. Don't ..."
Hermione stopped and looked at him, confused. "Don't what?" she asked, hurt.
Don't look at me like that! Harry cried inside his head. He had to protect her and the only way to do that was to keep her away from him; but he wouldn't be able to do that if she kept looking at him like that. "I don't want something happening to you or Ron," he told her, forcing himself to stay where he was and not bury his face in her hair and cry his eyes out.
"Nothing will happen to me or Ron. This isn't your fault, Harry."
"Yes, it is!" he shouted, causing Hermione to jump back in alarm. "It's been my fault since the day I was born! My parents died trying to protect me, I suggested that Cedric and I should take the cup together, and Sirius would be alive if it weren't for me!" he cried, his breaths coming out rapidly and his eyes blazing.
Hermione took two tentative steps forward. It still scared her whenever someone shouted at her; an image of Anthony floated through her mind. But Harry was not Anthony and never would be. She had to stop letting the memories of Anthony control her.
"It's not your fault. You can't drown yourself with guilt every time something bad happens," she told him, walking closer. "You're parents don't blame you for their death, neither do Cedric or Sirius," she took his hands in hers and was relieved when he didn't make an attempt to remove them.
"How do you know?" he asked in a choked whisper. He was losing this battle.
"Because I know the person you are," Hermione placed one hand on his chest, feeling his heart beating rapidly against her palm. "You have one of the biggest hearts in the world and everyone thinks so. You're parents would be so proud of you and it shows in the letter your father wrote you. Sirius always considered you a son and you would have thought you were his son the way he would always talk about you!" she placed both her hands on the sides of his face, trying to get through to him. "Ron is proud of you and so am I."
Harry shook his head. He took her left hand in his own and stared at the ring he had given her. "I don't want anything happening to you. Maybe we shouldn't ..." Harry wanted to tell her to leave him, to find someone else who could give her a normal life. It would be painful to let her go but at least he knew she would be safe from harm.
"Don't you dare tell me to leave you, Harry James Potter!" Hermione cried, reading his thoughts once again. "Don't you get it? I love you so much it hurts! I would go to hell and back for you. When you asked me to marry you, I said yes because I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want us to start a life together, a family. You and me, Harry. Not me and someone else. No matter how much you push me away, I will always be by your side. As corny as it sounds, we are meant to be. Don't you see it?" sy now she had stepped a few feet back. Tears were rolling down her cheeks but she spoke firmly. But this last phrase came in an almost desperate whisper. "I love you, Harry. More than you'll ever know."
Harry stared at her for a moment before closing the distance between them. He took her tightly into his arms and buried his face in her hair. They didn't speak; no words were necessary.
* * *
Hermione yawned and opened her eyes. She slowly slid her arms from around Harry, careful not to wake him. As she stood up, she heard her stomach give a small growl. It was almost dinnertime and she was starved.
She kissed Harry on the forehead before tip toeing out of the room. As she appeared in the Gryffindor Common Room she was glad everyone was in the Great Hall. She wasn't in the mood for questions.
She made her way down the hallway and into the Great Hall. Though most of the kids were home for the holidays, the hall was still buzzing with excited chatter of Christmas gifts and mistletoe.
"Hey, Granger," she heard a familiar drawl as she took her seat at one of the long tables.
"Hi, Malfoy," Hermione replied as Draco took a seat across form her and gave her something that resembled a small smile.
Though Draco was on good terms with the trio, they had insisted on sticking with the last name basis.
"How is he?" Draco asked, spooning some noodle soup onto his bowl. His tone was serious and Hermione detected sorrow in his gray eyes. As she watched him eat, she couldn't figure out how Ginny had changed him so drastically.
"He's still sad and angry, of course, but he'll be fine. Could you tell me what happened?" Hermione asked, taking a bite of chicken.
"You don't know?" Draco asked her, surprised.
She shook her head and leaned forward, her food forgotten. "Tell me."
He took a deep breath and sighed. "Okay ..." then he launched into the story that brought tears to her eyes.
* * *
"Enough, Voldemort!" Sirius cried, pointing his wand to the retreating figure.
Voldemort turned around and laughed at them. "Enough?" he repeated, amusement evident in his voice. "And who are you two to tell me to stop?"
Sirius sneered at the Dark Lord, taking a step forward. Hagrid placed an oversized hand on his arm. "Don't let 'em get to ya." the giant told him, his own blood boiling with rage.
"Yes, the overgrown git is right. Don't let me get to you. Just go about your own business as I go about mine. Good day to you," Voldemort sneered and proceeded to walk away.
"Avada Kedavra!" Sirius cried, shocked when the spell seemed to bounce off Voldemort's back.
"Tsk, tsk. Do you actually think you can destroy me? Not even Potter can do that," he turned to face them, wand held out in front of him. "I will fight you, Black, but I really don't have a use for that great lug behind you. Avada Kedavra," he said, nonchalantly.
Seeing the green stream of light head for Hagrid, Sirius let out an angry cry, diving in front of his long time friend. The beam hit him so hard he fell back, sending Hagrid and himself flying to the ground several feet away from where they had been standing.
"No!" Hagrid cried, placing Sirius gently on the ground. "You'll pay fer this! One way or another," he told Voldemort.
"I'm sure I will. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have things to do, places to go, and people to see. Ta ta," with that, he gave Hagrid one more evil grin and disappeared in a cloud of smoke.
"Hagrid ..." Sirius whispered, his strength was wasting away drastically. He was shocked that he was still alive. "Tell Harry ..."
"No, you can tell 'Arry," Hagrid said, a large tear dripping off his chin. " I'm so 'orry, Sirius. It's all my fault ..."
"No, it's not Hagrid. Listen to me. Go to Dumbledore and tell him what happened. Then tell Harry I'm so sorry for letting him down. I didn't mean to break my promise. Tell him I love him and no matter what happens that good can overcome evil. Tell him that," he was taking short gasps of breath.
"But ..."
"Tell him!" Sirius cried, shutting his eyes and trying to shut out all the pain that was searing through his body.
"I will. I'll 'lways love you like a brother, Sirius," Hagrid told him, taking him into his massive arms.
"Me too, Hagrid. Always remember me," with that, his body became limp and his eyes shut. Hagrid would never forget the peaceful smile that Sirius was wearing when he died.
* * *
Hermione swiped at her tears, her head shaking from side to side. "Oh my ..." she mumbled, looking at Draco wide-eyed.
Draco blinked several times, not wanting Hermione to see him cry. He placed an arm around her shoulder, cursing Voldemort to the depths of the underworld.
"I-I should go," Hermione broke the silence as students began to stroll out of the Great Hall. Draco just nodded and helped her up.
"Tell Harry I'm so sorry and if there's anything I can do to tell me," Draco told her, giving her a small hug before walking away.
Hermione nodded to herself, mutely. She grabbed some food for Harry and walked out of the now empty hall, her mind and heart numb from pain.
* * *
Harry's eyes flew open, his heart beating rapidly. He removed his arms from around Hermione gently, not wanting to wake her up, and got out of bed. He paced across the room, trying to forget the nightmare that had woken him up.
"It was just a dream ..." he told himself, thankful that at least his scar wasn't hurting.
He went over to the window seat and sat down, opening the window an inch, feeling better when a blast of cold air cooled the sweat from his face. Harry stood up again and retrieved the 'memories' book that Hermione had gave him for Christmas.
With his heart beating and Hagrid's words floating through his head, he opened to Sirius' page. His heart caught in his throat as he recognized Sirius' small scrawl. Taking a deep breath he began to read.
Harry:
Hello, Son, how are you? I must say that this idea of Hermione's was a good one (like all her other ideas). You've caught yourself a good one, Harry, never let her go.
I'm sitting here wondering how to put all my thoughts about you on one piece of paper, and it's hard. I think I might need a large book to fill it up with all the incredible words that I would use to describe you. Well, I guess I'll just have to improvise.
First of all, you are the son I never had. Your parents would be so proud of you, Harry. I know I am. You've grown up to be such an incredible person, inside and out. No matter how hard life gets, you always have something to throw back at it. Nothing can discourage you, and that's what I love about you. Your confident, loyal, and so kind hearted. Not to mention that your a hunk (Harry shook his head, here. A smile lighting up his face). Don't you shake your head at me! I'm telling you the truth -- just ask your fiance.
I know I could never replace you father's spot but I hope I helped you in any way I could. I know I'm not going to live forever and I might not even make it to your wedding day, but I will always be here when you need me, I'll always be behind you (unless of course, you make Hermione mad. Then your on your own). No matter where I am, you can always talk to me.
And Harry? I tried so hard to protect you and your parents. Please believe me. They were my family and I loved them with all my heart. I will never forgive myself but I will die easier knowing that their son forgives me.
Well, I'm blubbering all over the paper and smearing it. Hermione will have a fit at my sloppiness. Always remember who your real friends and family are and stop feeling guilty for things that have gone wrong. You of all people deserve the best in life, so you go out there and kick their butts, kid. I love you always.
Love Always, Your Godfather Sirius
Harry wiped away the tears that were rolling down his face and for the first time since hearing that his Godfather had died, a smile lit his face. His heart didn't feel so heavy anymore and he actually felt peaceful. He knew Sirius was in a much happier place and that he was reunited with his two best friends.
"I forgive you, Sirius ... " Harry whispered, having forgiven him many years ago.
Author's Note: Finally done!!! I'm so sorry this chapter took me so long (I say that every time, don't I?) but I was having problems with the Hagrid and Sirius part -- which is why it's so retarded. I know it sounds unrealistic but I ran out of ideas! So I apologize for that scene. Also, I know many of you guys are mad at me for killing Sirius, I'm sorry but he's really dead -- no coming back to life. Sorry! And this whole chapter happened in one day. Meaning it was still Christmas Day. The next chapter will be Sirius' funeral so stay tuned for that.
A billion thanks to all my reviewers! Luv ya. (oh, and don't forget to review!!)
Sweetie