I hear Bosco turn beside me and slit open my eyes to the sun filled room. Instead of saying anything I make believe I'm asleep and think about my life. Cuez, chica, your life is a mess. Compared to most that is. I can sense Bosco is feeling the same way, when I talk to him. I have nowhere to go. I feel like life doesn't want me anymore. This is why I turn to Bosco.

Bosco makes me feel like I have a meaning to the world. He's so special to me. It's a weird sort of relationship I guess. We both need each other. I don't know who I would turn to if Bosco wasn't here. That's why I'm scared a lot. Because of our jobs in the anticrime agency and NYPD anything can happen to either of us any day. I wonder what he would do without me. I wonder if he would be fine and move on to the next best thing or would he fall apart. Well at least that's what he tells me. I trust him though and he trusts me. We trust each other. Who else do we have?  He has Faith but I don't have anyone. My life would fall apart without Bosco to say the least. He's the one person in my life who probably cares whether I'm dead or alive. I'm definite Faith and the others would care less. They think I'm a 'Latina bitch with an attitude that could kill.' Oh give me a break! I wish that Faith could take one day in my shoes and see how it feels.

Bosco tells me a lot about his life. Something's he hasn't even told anyone. I think it's because we are in the same stage in life, both miserable, lost souls perhaps. We both have had tough pasts and similar problems. I feel sympathy towards Bosco sometimes. I hear about his childhood and his brother Mikey. He tells me about how his parents were and how they didn't support the family. It reminded me much of my own with my sister. He has a lot of stress on him. I'm here for him and do my best to make him feel more useful to life. It makes me feel like I have a meaning. Maybe we are each others guardian angels? Hey, I'm not talking crazy. Could be though, we are both always there for each other. But that's what friends are for I guess.

I don't know what I would do without him to be truthfully honest. Maybe I would die. Maybe I would live my life alone and miserable. Half of the time I do feel alone. Like now. Even though he's right next to me I feel empty. This is because I'm thinking about my messed up life. I wish I could change it. Sometimes I envy Faith. I wish I had someone who loves me like her husband does. She has the perfect family in my eyes. But hey, grass is greener on the other side right?

I'm not sure if I'm in love with Bosco. I do love him, don't get me wrong. I know he cares about me. He told me he loved me. I sure did feel like a bitch when I just stood there speechless. That hurt him a lot. I can tell It did. Even though he knows I love him I don't know if I'm 'in love' with him. Love sucks. We both agreed on that. So does talking. Talking leads to fights and fights lead to hell in his words. That's what he told me after we had a few fights. The truth is talking is the key to our relationship. Even know it has so many consequences, we wouldn't feel the same way if we never talked. Hell no. I guess it was just meant to be. For me to find Bosco and for Bosco to find me. Together.