~~~~Part 9~~~~
0915 est
Mac's apartment
(Harm's POV)
"Uh-huh...good job!" Mac is talking to Chloe, and judging by the way the conversation has been going, Chloe passed her history test.
"Hang on, sweetheart, I have another call...hello? Oh, hey Harriet!" Okay, I sense a babysitting job coming.
"Of course, I'd love to have him for the day. I should tell you, though, Harm and I were planning on spending the day running errands. I don't want him to be bored. I mean, we won't spend the whole day running errands, but..."
There's a pause, and Mac's listening to Harriet, then, "No, no...Harriet, it's not an intrusion. You know both Harm and I love to spend time with him." Another pause. "Yes, Harriet, I'm positive." She's smiling and shaking her head. "Okay, Harriet...1000 is fine...alright...we'll see you then...bye." She hangs up with Harriet and then resumes her phone conversation with Chloe.
I think she might be on the phone for a while, so I guess I'll start to clean up a little before Bud and Harriet bring AJ over. I grab our empty coffee mugs and take them into the kitchen to clean, along with the coffee pot. I fill the sink up with soap and water and start to wash when Mac comes in.
"Harm, what are you doing, I can get those."
Without turning around, I respond, "So can I."
She's right behind me now, and she says, "Let me get them, Harm. You just sit down in the living room."
I scoop up some suds with both my hands, turn around quickly, and smear her cheeks with the soap. Her face takes on a look of shock, which is hilarious when contrasted with the foam that is now dripping down it. I give her a simple reply, "No."
"Oh, Squid, you'd better run, because I'll drown you if I catch you." And then she reaches around me and grabs a handful of suds. I've already started running, but she catches my arm, slowing me down. Then she jumps on my back and plasters my face from behind with her soapy hand. I grab both her arms around my neck and hold them to my chest so that she can't go anywhere. I go into the living room with Mac kicking her legs in an effort to get free.
"Harm, put me down! I was just paying you back...you started it! Put...me...down!"
"Okay." I roll her off my back onto the couch and then grab a cushion and start to hit her with it.
"Argh! No fair, Harm, you're bigger than me!" I laugh. She could beat me up if she really wanted to.
"Oh, come on, Mac, you're a Marine Colonel...surely you could take on a lowly Navy Commander. Or maybe the Navy really is better than the Corps..." That did it. She grabs a pillow between my attacks and jumps up from the couch. Before I know it, she's got me disarmed and on the couch, receiving the same treatment I had just dealt out to her. Okay, this is a little different...she's got me pinned down, sitting on my stomach, and tickling me. As much as I hate to admit it, I am ticklish, and Mac knows just how to get me. I'm helpless. Luckily for me, there's a knock on the door right at that moment.
Mac quickly jumps up off of me and runs to answer the door, wiping her face to be sure there is no more soap on it. I do the same thing while I'm getting up from the couch. I start to rearrange cushions that had fallen onto the floor as she opens the door.
I hear "Unca Harm!" an instant before I'm hit with a three-and-a-half-year- old whirlwind.
"Hey, buddy. That's some tackle you've got there. Did Aunt Mac teach you that?"
"Uhh...yeah!" He answers and then jumps on me again.
"AJ, sweetie, try not to kill the commander. I'm sorry, sir."
"Oh, don't worry about him, Harriet, Harm needs a good roughing up every once in awhile...it helps to keep his ego in check.
"I don't have an ego."
"And I don't have breasts." I take a quick look, just to double-check (uh...no pun intended), and sure enough, they're still there. Yep, I must have an ego.
"Unca Harm, what's a nee-go?"
Mac jumps in before I can answer, "That's when a guy thinks that he can make any girl go weak in the knees just by smiling at her."
"Oh." He thinks about this for a few seconds, then says, "Unca Harm, you do have a nee-go. You smile at Aunt Mac all the time!" Wow, I didn't see that one coming. Apparently, neither did Harriet or Mac, because we were all gawking at him. Mac, unfortunately, is the first to recover.
"Ahem...does he, now?"
AJ nods enthusiastically. "Uh-huh!"
Mac continues, "But it doesn't work on Aunt Mac, does it? Because Aunt Mac is too smart to fall for Uncle Harm's ego, isn't she?"
He looks over at his mom, then at me. I shake my head no. He looks back at Mac, smiles, and says, "Yes."
Mac grins and looks at me, but still addresses AJ, "That's what I like to hear, little man."
AJ, finding all of this very amusing, looks at me and giggles. I give him a mock glare and say, "Traitor."
All the while, Harriet has been standing in the doorway, and now she speaks up, "AJ, honey, Mommy has to go now, Daddy's waiting in the car. I'll pick you up later. You be good for Harm and Mac, and have fun!" Then she turns to us and says, "Thank you again for watching him on such short notice."
"Don't mention it, Harriet. We'll have a blast," I say.
"Well, alright...but you will call if there's any problem, right?"
"Harriet, Harm and I are two mature adults...well, I am, I don't really know about Harm. Anyway, we'll call if we need you for anything. Now go...Bud's waiting!"
"Yes, Ma'am." Harriet kneels down to AJ and gives him a kiss and then gets up and leaves.
He turns around with his hands on his hips and his lips pursed. I look at Mac, eyebrow raised. This is going to be fun.
"This is going to be fun."
************************************************************
1034 est
Laundromat
(Harm's POV)
Mac is soon done loading her clothes into the washing machine. I've been trying to keep AJ occupied, but it isn't easy. She comes over and gestures for us to step outside. Once we're there on the sidewalk, she says,
"Okay, who wants some...ice cream?"
"Ooh, ooh, I do, me, me, me!" AJ is jumping up and down with his hand waving wildly.
Oh, what the heck, I may as well join in, "Ooh, ooh, me too, me too!"
She smiles and shakes her head and says, "Okay, boys...let's go get some ice cream, then. We'll go to the cart in the park."
"Yes! Alright, buddy, give me five!" He jumps up and slaps my hand, then I reach down and pick him up and sling him over my shoulder. We start walking along the park trail toward the ice cream cart.
"Unca Harm! Put me down!"
"Mac, do you hear something?"
"I don't know...maybe."
"Aunt Mac, help!"
"I think there's a noise coming from this sack of potatoes I've got on my shoulder."
"Yeah, I think I hear it, now. Oh, well. It's probably nothing."
"Unca Harm, I'm not a sack a 'tatoes! Aunt Mac, it's me, AJ!"
She lets out a mock gasp. "Harm, that sack of potatoes turned into our godson!"
"What? How did you do that, Mr. Roberts? That was amazing!" I pull him off of my shoulder and hand him to Mac. "Here, hold him for a second. I think I know what's going on...he's just hiding my potatoes from me."
"Oh, okay," Mac catches on to what I'm doing. I hold out my tickle fingers to him, and he squeals before I've even touched him.
"Nooooo!!!! No tickling! No tickling! AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!"
I unleash my merciless attack, all the while still acting as though I'm searching for my missing potatoes. "Well, they're not on his kneecaps...let's check under his arms..."
"AAAAAAHHHHH, NOOOOOOO!!!!! Aunt Mac, HEEEELLLLLP!!!!"
People on the sidewalk are looking in our direction, most of them smiling.
"I know where you're keeping my potatoes..." I get an evil glint in my eye.
"Unca...Harm...I don't have your...'tatoes." He's out of breath, and still giggling.
"Oh, yes you do...they're in your...TUMMY!!!!"
"NOOOOOO!!!!!!" I grab him from Mac and tell her to lift up his shirt for me so that I can look. She pulls it up and I blow a raspberry on his belly button. He screams with laughter, and I set him down on the ground, making sure he's steady enough to stand on his own before completely letting go.
"Well, I guess he was telling the truth. No potatoes."
"I told you, Unca Harm!" I look down at him and smile and reach out my hand for him to hold onto. He takes it, and then offers Mac his other hand, which she readily accepts.
We come up to the ice cream cart and AJ asks for a cup of "chocolate ice cweam with wainbow spwinkles in a cup," while Mac orders mint chocolate chip ice cream in a cone.
"Nothing for you, Harm?" she asks me.
I just shake my head and say, "Nah, whatever he doesn't eat, I'll finish."
She looks down at AJ, who gives us a chocolatey grin, complete with a sprinkle mustache. We both laugh and make our way over to a bench.
AJ is finished after he's gotten about halfway through his cup. It looks like most of it never actually made it past his lips. His shirt is a colorful combination of the original yellow and the recently added brown and rainbow. Mac hands me her ice cream cone to hold while she attempts to clean him up a little bit.
After he's fairly clean, Mac turns to me to get her ice cream. I start to pass it to her, then change my mind.
"Hang on," I say. I take it and lick all around the dripping treat, coax a shocked look from my partner and a response from AJ.
"Ewww, Unca Harm! That has Aunt Mac's germs on it!"
Mac and I both burst out laughing, and I hand her the ice cream cone before picking up AJ and whispering in his ear (loud enough for Mac to understand), "But I like Aunt Mac's germs." Her eyes widen and her jaw drops.
"Well, if he likes them so much..."
"Yuck!" He says. I set him down and Mac and I follow him as he runs to the swing set.
"I can't wait until we have our own family."
I know exactly how she feels.
0915 est
Mac's apartment
(Harm's POV)
"Uh-huh...good job!" Mac is talking to Chloe, and judging by the way the conversation has been going, Chloe passed her history test.
"Hang on, sweetheart, I have another call...hello? Oh, hey Harriet!" Okay, I sense a babysitting job coming.
"Of course, I'd love to have him for the day. I should tell you, though, Harm and I were planning on spending the day running errands. I don't want him to be bored. I mean, we won't spend the whole day running errands, but..."
There's a pause, and Mac's listening to Harriet, then, "No, no...Harriet, it's not an intrusion. You know both Harm and I love to spend time with him." Another pause. "Yes, Harriet, I'm positive." She's smiling and shaking her head. "Okay, Harriet...1000 is fine...alright...we'll see you then...bye." She hangs up with Harriet and then resumes her phone conversation with Chloe.
I think she might be on the phone for a while, so I guess I'll start to clean up a little before Bud and Harriet bring AJ over. I grab our empty coffee mugs and take them into the kitchen to clean, along with the coffee pot. I fill the sink up with soap and water and start to wash when Mac comes in.
"Harm, what are you doing, I can get those."
Without turning around, I respond, "So can I."
She's right behind me now, and she says, "Let me get them, Harm. You just sit down in the living room."
I scoop up some suds with both my hands, turn around quickly, and smear her cheeks with the soap. Her face takes on a look of shock, which is hilarious when contrasted with the foam that is now dripping down it. I give her a simple reply, "No."
"Oh, Squid, you'd better run, because I'll drown you if I catch you." And then she reaches around me and grabs a handful of suds. I've already started running, but she catches my arm, slowing me down. Then she jumps on my back and plasters my face from behind with her soapy hand. I grab both her arms around my neck and hold them to my chest so that she can't go anywhere. I go into the living room with Mac kicking her legs in an effort to get free.
"Harm, put me down! I was just paying you back...you started it! Put...me...down!"
"Okay." I roll her off my back onto the couch and then grab a cushion and start to hit her with it.
"Argh! No fair, Harm, you're bigger than me!" I laugh. She could beat me up if she really wanted to.
"Oh, come on, Mac, you're a Marine Colonel...surely you could take on a lowly Navy Commander. Or maybe the Navy really is better than the Corps..." That did it. She grabs a pillow between my attacks and jumps up from the couch. Before I know it, she's got me disarmed and on the couch, receiving the same treatment I had just dealt out to her. Okay, this is a little different...she's got me pinned down, sitting on my stomach, and tickling me. As much as I hate to admit it, I am ticklish, and Mac knows just how to get me. I'm helpless. Luckily for me, there's a knock on the door right at that moment.
Mac quickly jumps up off of me and runs to answer the door, wiping her face to be sure there is no more soap on it. I do the same thing while I'm getting up from the couch. I start to rearrange cushions that had fallen onto the floor as she opens the door.
I hear "Unca Harm!" an instant before I'm hit with a three-and-a-half-year- old whirlwind.
"Hey, buddy. That's some tackle you've got there. Did Aunt Mac teach you that?"
"Uhh...yeah!" He answers and then jumps on me again.
"AJ, sweetie, try not to kill the commander. I'm sorry, sir."
"Oh, don't worry about him, Harriet, Harm needs a good roughing up every once in awhile...it helps to keep his ego in check.
"I don't have an ego."
"And I don't have breasts." I take a quick look, just to double-check (uh...no pun intended), and sure enough, they're still there. Yep, I must have an ego.
"Unca Harm, what's a nee-go?"
Mac jumps in before I can answer, "That's when a guy thinks that he can make any girl go weak in the knees just by smiling at her."
"Oh." He thinks about this for a few seconds, then says, "Unca Harm, you do have a nee-go. You smile at Aunt Mac all the time!" Wow, I didn't see that one coming. Apparently, neither did Harriet or Mac, because we were all gawking at him. Mac, unfortunately, is the first to recover.
"Ahem...does he, now?"
AJ nods enthusiastically. "Uh-huh!"
Mac continues, "But it doesn't work on Aunt Mac, does it? Because Aunt Mac is too smart to fall for Uncle Harm's ego, isn't she?"
He looks over at his mom, then at me. I shake my head no. He looks back at Mac, smiles, and says, "Yes."
Mac grins and looks at me, but still addresses AJ, "That's what I like to hear, little man."
AJ, finding all of this very amusing, looks at me and giggles. I give him a mock glare and say, "Traitor."
All the while, Harriet has been standing in the doorway, and now she speaks up, "AJ, honey, Mommy has to go now, Daddy's waiting in the car. I'll pick you up later. You be good for Harm and Mac, and have fun!" Then she turns to us and says, "Thank you again for watching him on such short notice."
"Don't mention it, Harriet. We'll have a blast," I say.
"Well, alright...but you will call if there's any problem, right?"
"Harriet, Harm and I are two mature adults...well, I am, I don't really know about Harm. Anyway, we'll call if we need you for anything. Now go...Bud's waiting!"
"Yes, Ma'am." Harriet kneels down to AJ and gives him a kiss and then gets up and leaves.
He turns around with his hands on his hips and his lips pursed. I look at Mac, eyebrow raised. This is going to be fun.
"This is going to be fun."
************************************************************
1034 est
Laundromat
(Harm's POV)
Mac is soon done loading her clothes into the washing machine. I've been trying to keep AJ occupied, but it isn't easy. She comes over and gestures for us to step outside. Once we're there on the sidewalk, she says,
"Okay, who wants some...ice cream?"
"Ooh, ooh, I do, me, me, me!" AJ is jumping up and down with his hand waving wildly.
Oh, what the heck, I may as well join in, "Ooh, ooh, me too, me too!"
She smiles and shakes her head and says, "Okay, boys...let's go get some ice cream, then. We'll go to the cart in the park."
"Yes! Alright, buddy, give me five!" He jumps up and slaps my hand, then I reach down and pick him up and sling him over my shoulder. We start walking along the park trail toward the ice cream cart.
"Unca Harm! Put me down!"
"Mac, do you hear something?"
"I don't know...maybe."
"Aunt Mac, help!"
"I think there's a noise coming from this sack of potatoes I've got on my shoulder."
"Yeah, I think I hear it, now. Oh, well. It's probably nothing."
"Unca Harm, I'm not a sack a 'tatoes! Aunt Mac, it's me, AJ!"
She lets out a mock gasp. "Harm, that sack of potatoes turned into our godson!"
"What? How did you do that, Mr. Roberts? That was amazing!" I pull him off of my shoulder and hand him to Mac. "Here, hold him for a second. I think I know what's going on...he's just hiding my potatoes from me."
"Oh, okay," Mac catches on to what I'm doing. I hold out my tickle fingers to him, and he squeals before I've even touched him.
"Nooooo!!!! No tickling! No tickling! AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!"
I unleash my merciless attack, all the while still acting as though I'm searching for my missing potatoes. "Well, they're not on his kneecaps...let's check under his arms..."
"AAAAAAHHHHH, NOOOOOOO!!!!! Aunt Mac, HEEEELLLLLP!!!!"
People on the sidewalk are looking in our direction, most of them smiling.
"I know where you're keeping my potatoes..." I get an evil glint in my eye.
"Unca...Harm...I don't have your...'tatoes." He's out of breath, and still giggling.
"Oh, yes you do...they're in your...TUMMY!!!!"
"NOOOOOO!!!!!!" I grab him from Mac and tell her to lift up his shirt for me so that I can look. She pulls it up and I blow a raspberry on his belly button. He screams with laughter, and I set him down on the ground, making sure he's steady enough to stand on his own before completely letting go.
"Well, I guess he was telling the truth. No potatoes."
"I told you, Unca Harm!" I look down at him and smile and reach out my hand for him to hold onto. He takes it, and then offers Mac his other hand, which she readily accepts.
We come up to the ice cream cart and AJ asks for a cup of "chocolate ice cweam with wainbow spwinkles in a cup," while Mac orders mint chocolate chip ice cream in a cone.
"Nothing for you, Harm?" she asks me.
I just shake my head and say, "Nah, whatever he doesn't eat, I'll finish."
She looks down at AJ, who gives us a chocolatey grin, complete with a sprinkle mustache. We both laugh and make our way over to a bench.
AJ is finished after he's gotten about halfway through his cup. It looks like most of it never actually made it past his lips. His shirt is a colorful combination of the original yellow and the recently added brown and rainbow. Mac hands me her ice cream cone to hold while she attempts to clean him up a little bit.
After he's fairly clean, Mac turns to me to get her ice cream. I start to pass it to her, then change my mind.
"Hang on," I say. I take it and lick all around the dripping treat, coax a shocked look from my partner and a response from AJ.
"Ewww, Unca Harm! That has Aunt Mac's germs on it!"
Mac and I both burst out laughing, and I hand her the ice cream cone before picking up AJ and whispering in his ear (loud enough for Mac to understand), "But I like Aunt Mac's germs." Her eyes widen and her jaw drops.
"Well, if he likes them so much..."
"Yuck!" He says. I set him down and Mac and I follow him as he runs to the swing set.
"I can't wait until we have our own family."
I know exactly how she feels.