Author's Note: Well, it was abound to happen. My imagination, rightfully mistaken for a rampant hippopotamus with rabies, has finally come up with a new Harry Potter story. It's pure fluff to a Nine Inch Nails song, "The Fragile", which belongs to Mr. Reznor and not me. Harry Potter and his posse don't belong to me either, so bugger off. Anyway, I can either completely degrade the song and the books, or I could really compliment both. Hopefully, it's the latter.
The Fragile
Harry had always thought of Hermione as his inspiration. All right, perhaps even his motivation. He had always tried to model her as the ideal student; he had taken her advice on school matters, and just sometimes in his personal life. He sighed, looked up at the ceiling of the Gryffindor common room, and said: " So why is she so depressed? If the 'great' Harry Potter models himself after her?"
Ron, whom was reclining happily on a soft pouf, looked at loss of words. " Maybe she's just stressed."
" Slitting your wrists seven times each is not stressed. If I hadn't found her, she might have…" Harry couldn't choke the words out. Might have died. Hermione Granger, a model student, would be dead.
" Something went wrong," Ron said simply. " Something in her life must have become unbearable."
" Do you think someone was making fun of her?" Harry exclaimed. " Cho did say that some of the seventh year girls have been pretty cruel to her." Harry was going out with Cho, now that he was in his fifth year. They'd been dating for nearly six months.
" Maybe it's Cho." Ron hinted darkly.
" Cho would never make fun of Hermione." Harry spat. " She's got too much integrity. She doesn't even make fun of the opposite team! Never!"
" Harry," Ron said. " What I meant was that she might be jealous of Cho. Over you, numbskull."
" Oh, come on!" Harry shook his head. " There's no way…"
" Yes there is!" Ron jumped off the pouf excitedly. " She asked you to the dance at the beginning of fifth year, remember? And when you told her you were going with Cho, she ended up not going."
" She didn't have a date. She said she…" Harry paused. " She told me it was fine. She caught up on her homework, that's what she said."
" Hermione? Falling behind in homework?" Ron scoffed. " Lavender says she caught Hermione crying in the hospital wing during the dance." Lavender hadn't gone to the dance either; she had been in a slight Potions accident that caused her fingers to melt together into a scary glove shape.
" Hermione couldn't have a crush on me!" Harry protested. " I never did anything to lead her on!"
" I guess you didn't," Ron said. " But girls don't really think that way. They like some of the most unusual boys. Remember Ginny's week-long infatuation with Draco? That ended quickly…"
" The git! He spit in her face when she asked him to the dance!" Harry punched the bed angrily.
" What I'm saying is, Hermione didn't need to be led on by you to fall for you."
" But she's my best friend, Ron. I just don't… I can't even face her now, if that's how she feels."
" Are you joking?" Ron asked. " She needs your support now, more than ever! She's been so depressed for these last few months; can't you give her a chance at least?"
Harry nodded. " I sure as hell don't want her to kill herself."
" I think she's stupid." Ron muttered. " Stupid, since you've got your head all wrapped up with Cho, Cho everything."
" Leave Cho out of this. She's … she's..." Harry said miserably.
" What do you like about her, Harry? Honestly, Cho's just good looks and jock-girl charm. She hasn't got an ounce of brains." Ron accused him. " You've been so attentive to Cho that you completely ignored Hermione for some time. You ignored me too."
" Well, sorry!" Harry choked out. " At least I could get a girlfriend!"
" You know what? You should get over yourself, Harry! Ever since you became captain, your ego became too big for your own good!" Ron shouted.
" Maybe it's you that's just jealous! Jealous as always, Ron!"
" I hate you, Harry!" Ron stared in shock, realizing his own words, then continued, empowered: "That's right! I hate this new you! You left all your old friends behind! All you do is talk to Cho, hang with her friends! You've turned into a total and complete bastard!"
" How dare you say that! Leave me alone!" Harry shouted, turning away from him.
" No! You leave me alone!" Ron said. " I'm going to see Hermione. Unlike you, I can tell which friends are worth my time."
" You don't know anything about Cho!" Harry said, but realized how stupid he sounded. Suddenly, he felt like the biggest loser in the world. Ron left the room, and Harry went to see Cho. He had to talk to her.
She shines
In a world full of ugliness
She matters
When everything is meaningless
Cho crossed her legs, and then uncrossed them again, her long gleaming legs peeking out seductively from beneath a small skirt. " What's wrong, Harry?" She asked. She snapped her fingers, giggling. " Hey, up here, Harry. My face is up here."
Harry looked up from her legs and peered into her gorgeous face. " Cho." He said, softly, his insides melting.
" Uh… look. Harry, before you say anything, um…" She grinned softly. " I just wanted to tell you that I really appreciate how you got me into those Honors courses. I couldn't have done it without your influence." She smiled brightly to herself. " It's going to look so good on my work applications. I sent some out to the Ministry already."
" Yeah; you're welcome," Harry said absent-mindedly. " Cho, there's a problem. I think Hermione's got a crush on me."
" Oh, duh!" Cho laughed. " You just noticed?"
" Am I the only one that didn't know?" Harry asked angrily.
" Seems like it," Cho grinned in a sexy way. " Maybe you were kissing me whenever she was looking at you all moon-eyed, or whatever the word is."
" Ron says that she… she hurt herself because of me."
" Maybe she did. I think she's kind of stupid," Cho admitted. " I mean, not school-wise, but she's just so out of it. She wears that… that stuff…"
" Okay, so maybe she doesn't dress like a teenager." Harry saw himself defending her and was taken aback.
" Who's side are you on anyway?" Cho demanded.
" I…" He stopped. Suddenly, he saw her for who she was. Manipulative, in love with herself above all things, hoping to tear him from his friends so that he'd offer her everything. All the trips to Hogsmeade he funded, all the gifts, all the favors he did for her…!
" What's wrong with you?" Cho wrinkled her nose. " Your face looks retarded."
Harry started laughing.
" What the hell?"
He shook his head. " God. I can't believe I didn't see this before."
" See what? Are you okay?" Cho gasped. " If you've gone off the edge like your spooky little Hermione friend, then please do it somewhere else. Away from me; this is embarrassing."
Harry looked away from her. " See you around, Cho. I've gotta see someone."
Fragile
She doesn't see her beauty
She tries to get away
Sometimes
It's just that nothing seems worth saving
I can't watch her slip away
Harry raced up the staircase, heading for the Hospital Wing. There, he passed Madame Pomfrey and approached Hermione's bed. She was lying there, looking absolutely horrid. Just a few hours ago, she'd slit her wrists, and now finally they were letting her see people.
She turned her head and looked at him, teary-eyed. " Ron just left," She whispered hoarsely. " I thought you were out with Cho. Again." She said the last word bitterly.
" Hermione," Harry crooned, emotions flooding him. " Aw, man. Why'd you do it?"
She sighed. " I didn't do it for attention, Harry. I just… I wanted to be gone. But I wanted to feel pain at the same time, you know? Punish myself for being stupid."
" You're not stupid!" Harry whispered to her, taking her bandaged hand into his.
" I could have done a spell, right?" Hermione looked down at her nails, bitten to the quick. " I could have done that, and succeeded. But I wanted to hurt. I guess I am crazy."
" No you're not!" He whispered. " I was so wrong to you."
" You just feel guilty," Hermione replied. " It's okay, Harry. I… I promise I'll leave you alone. I won't interfere with Cho or anything."
" Hermione," He said her name as if she were a fragile thing, ready to escape at any time. " Believe me, I'm not here on a guilt trip. I can't… I can't believe I was so blind! I was the one that was stupid. I feel so stripped – Ron just literally ripped Cho's hands from my eyes."
She smiled wanly. " I don't need your pity."
" I'm not pitying you!" Harry felt tears roll down his face. " I did this to you. I should have… above all, I should have been attentive. You were my best friend first, before any girl. I was like you… I was trying so hard to be like you."
She took her hand from his and looked away. " You can go now, Harry." There was something final about her voice.
I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart
Harry sat outside the hospital wing, his eyes flooding with tears. So this is what reality is like. It's a punch in the face. He stood when he saw Ron approaching him. " I'm sorry, Harry," Ron said, softly. " I overreacted. It's just… I'm sorry."
" I'm sorry too," Harry told him. " I'm sorry for being such an asshole."
" It's okay. I should have warned you sooner. I guess… I guess I almost felt happy, seeing you turn into such a wart in front of everyone's eyes," Ron smirked. " I am jealous of you, aren't I?"
" We're all so fragile," Harry whispered hoarsely. " Just porous little egg shells, aren't we? Seeping and absorbing. And I guess I plugged myself up with Cho. I shouldn't have put my best friends on the back burner." He felt a slight epiphany.
" Harry, it's better to figure it out now than never." Ron mentioned.
" Ron," Harry looked at him, his eyes glazed. " Hermione will never forgive me."
" She won't forgive herself above all." Ron told Harry.
She reads the minds of all the people as they pass her by
Hoping someone can see
If I could fix myself I'd –
But it's too late for me
Hermione lay on her bed, thinking about what everyone else must think of her now. She could read their minds – Neville was probably frightened out of his mind by her; Lavender must think she was stupid to do this over a guy; Ginny probably felt pity for her, Ginny and Colin, her wonderful boyfriend.
" Harry is waiting outside. He wants to talk to you." Madame Pomfrey said to her from afar.
" Oh," Hermione shrugged to herself, and sat there for a while, thinking. " Madame Pomfrey?" She said loudly.
The nurse appeared before her, smiling kindly. " What is it, sugar plum?" She asked.
" I…" Hermione coughed softly. " Can you send Harry away? I don't want to talk to him again."
" Actually, he's just sitting out in the hall, speaking with Ron," Madame Pomfrey exclaimed. " I'll go tell him." She walked off.
Hermione looked at her bandage-clad hands, thinking sadly, I'm so stupid. So now Harry feels sorry for me. Everyone will feel sorry for me. He'll go out with me out of pity, and I'll live a fake life. Like a play, everyone circling it around me, to please me. She buried her face in the pillow, sobbing. I want to die.
I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart
Harry forced his way past Madame Pomfrey anyway.
" Mr. Potter, just a minute!" The nurse shouted after him, but he didn't care. He barged inside and towards Hermione.
She sat up, tugging the covers up to cover herself. " Harry!" She gasped.
" Hermione, listen to me!" Harry said. " I broke up with Cho."
" Let me guess. You want to go out with me." She said.
" No. I want to introduce myself to you."
" What? Have you gone crazy?" She exclaimed.
" It's too late for me, the old me," He shook his head. " Let's try to start again. Hi, my name's Harry Potter. You're a really pretty girl, what's your name?"
She blushed and looked down at her blanket. " Really stupid, Harry."
" Oh! Miss Really Stupid, huh?" Harry laughed lightly.
She grinned. " Hermione Granger." She gave him her hand. They shook.
" Let's try again. Let's become best friends again. Let's build that trust again," He whispered into her ear, leaning closer. " It's the best I can offer. The old me, reborn. What do you say?"
" Alright." She sniffled and let her tears fall again.
" Don't cry," He hugged her. " I'm so sorry!" He stroked her hair gently. " I am so sorry."
We'll find the perfect place where we can run and hide
I'll build a wall and we can keep them on the other side
…But they keep waiting
…And picking…
So maybe others would make fun of him. They'd tell Harry for months later that Cho was the hottest girl in school, and yet he dumped her for an ugly duckling – Hermione Granger. Yet Hermione was honestly beautiful to him, gorgeous.
For months later, they'd tease him, they'd pick away, everyone that had been his friends thanks to Cho. His fake friends, his glamorous, glittering social circle. The social hierarchy, what a laugh it really is. The damage it does to others.
Yet, Harry didn't care. The laughter turned into applause. It didn't matter what they thought, he wouldn't fit in with them any longer. No matter how much Cho whined about it to her friends, no matter how many guys would later on tell him he was stupid.
He had Hermione. The whole time, he had someone in front of him that was so beautiful, so great. He'd broken her trust, but it was still repairable. They started over.
And eventually, they had an even stronger bond than before. And this time, it feels like it's real. Harry thought to himself. It's real love. There's nothing fake to it. No big show, no race for popularity. Just true feelings to each other. Oblivious to what others think.
It's something I have to do
I won't let you fall apart
I was there, too
I won't let you fall apart
Before everything else
I won't let you fall apart
I was like you
I won't let you fall apart