Chapter 1
In the days following the death of Albus Dumbledore, every person in the Order had
shown a different reaction. Most cried, and most screamed and cursed.
Ron had screamed off in the direction that Voldemort had fled, yelling as many curse
words as he could think of, all the while tears beginning to stream down his face. Michelle
had comforted him, crying herself, as he screamed, and soon the couple had sat together,
crying. James had simply walked back into the castle, assumingly to go play his guitar, and
cry to himself, where no one could see him. All of the senior members of the Order had
put on a strong face at first, just for the younger members, but all had cried to themselves
that night, in their separate rooms. Hermoine's family hadn't cried, they didn't know
Dumbledore, but had conveyed their condolences to the rest of the group, and had each
seemed deeply saddened. Hermoine had burst into tears, and remained that way for several
hours. Even Draco Malfoy had shed some silent tears as he helped to carry Dumbledore's
body back to the castle.
Yes, it seemed as everyone close to Dumbledore had cried that day, everyone with the
exception of Harry. Harry had always been the core of the group. The rock that the others
looked to for strength. So Harry played that roll he assumed he should. He had been the
one to place Dumbledore's body into his study, for safe keeping until the funeral. It had
been he who held Hermoine for hours as she cried. It had been he would had sent letters
to several important people, informing them of the tragedy, and telling them it would be
for the best to keep it under-wraps for the time being. Harry had consoled every single
person who had came to him crying that first night, but he himself had not shed a tear. He
couldn't. He felt as if it was he who must not cry, He could not show that weakness now.
It was he who must remain strong for everyone. He must not show that he was hurting,
even if he felt as though he would pass out at times from the pain he felt in his heart.
Several days passed, and the occupants of Hogwarts started acting semi-normal once
again. While the laughs were few and far between, there were actually a few smiles that
could be seen around the castle. Yes it felt as though things might start getting back to
something close to normal, if it wasn't for Harry that is. Harry hadn't cried, laughed,
weeped, cursed, gotten angry, or showed any emotion of any kind since Dumbledore's
death. He didn't even show any affection to Hermoine, his love. While the group all slept
in the same room, and consequently, Hermoine had slept in Harry's bed, Harry had not
said one word of "Love" to Hermoine since Dumbledore's death. She had told him that she
loved him countless times, and he had returned that phrase, but with no feeling, almost as
if he were automated to respond. Hermoine noticed this of course, but just ignored it,
assuming Harry had just felt awful and wasn't in the mood to show affection. At least
Hermoine ignored it for the first week.
It had been 6 days since the death of Dumbledore, and Harry still hadn't came out of the
trance he appeared to be in. He didn't eat much, didn't talk much, he really didn't do
anything much. While the rest of the group had began to return to normal, Harry just sat
around all day, not doing much of anything. Sure he had organized the funeral, and
subsequently been the one to deal with the burying of Dumbledore, but he had not shown
a single ounce of emotion. And frankly Hermoine was getting tired of it.
After dinner on the 6th night, everyone had retreated to the Gryffindor common room, to
simply lounge about before bed. The day's studies had been rigorous for Ron, Hermoine,
Caty, James, and Malfoy. Harry of course not having to study because of his previous
training. Harry had sat down on the couch in front of the fire, seemingly content with
sitting there until time to go to bed. Hermoine had came and sat beside him, hoping for
some sign of affection. She had laid her head on his shoulder, hoping he would wrap his
arm around her, like he used to, but Harry didn't. He just sat there, staring at the fire.
Hermoine decided to try once more to see if she could get a reaction out of Harry. He laid
her arm across his chest and snuggled into the nape of his neck, but yet still, no reaction.
"Well that does it." Thought Hermoine to herself, "I am tired of this."
Hermoine straightened herself up and cleared her throat to get Harry's attention. He
turned his head to her, the same blank face still on that he had had on for days.
"What in the hell is you problem?" Hermoine had asked, clearly pissed off.
"I have no problem." Harry had replied simply.
Hermoine sighed loudly, "Well then why in the hell are you acting this way toward me?"
"Acting what way?" Harry had asked, dumbfounded.
"Like I am nothing to you anymore, you have shown me no affection, no sign of love,
NOTHING!" She had practically yelled the last part, in which the attention's of everyone
else in the common room had been attracted.
"What in the hell are you talking about?" Asked Harry, becoming pissed off.
Hermoine's eyes had blazed red, "The fact that ever since Dumbledore passed, you have
not give me one single sign of affection. Nothing. Haven't even held my hand. Haven't told
me you loved me and sounded as if you meant it, haven't even kissed me. So I say again,
What in the hell is your problem?"
Harry had become enraged at the mention of Dumbledore's name, "I'm sorry if the death
of my mentor has cause me not to want to be all over you all the time. I'm sorry if his
death has upset me. I'm sorry if I'm not being what you want right now, but you know
what? Too damned bad."
"Harry Potter, you are not the only one who lost someone. Every fucking person here was
attached to Dumbledore, and no one else has decided that they should recede into a shell
and not act alive anymore. If you are so hurt by his death, why have you not even cried,
huh Harry? And where do you get off acting like I want you all over me? A simple sign of
affection is all I want Harry, a simple hand holding, or kiss goodnight, or simply telling me
you loved me, is that so much to ask?" Hermoine had practically screamed, at this, the
other occupants of common room had decided that they would rather be somewhere else
right that moment.
Harry turned his head at these remarks.
Hermoine sighed again, then said in a smaller, shallower tone, "Just tell me Harry, why are
you acting this way?"
Harry finally gave up, "I'm just trying to be strong Hermoine. I'm trying to be the person I
am supposed to be, the leader. I'm trying to be strong for everyone, including you. That's
why I haven't shown any emotion, that's why I haven't cried, that's why I haven't shown
you that I love you, I'm trying to stay strong and not be weak. I'm trying to be the leader
that Dumbledore was." Harry's voice trailed off as he spoke these last words.
"Oh Harry. You don't have to shut off the world just to be strong. You don't have to cut
me, or anyone else off from your emotions just to appear strong. It's OK to cry, it's OK to
show emotion, it's not showing weakness, it's being human. And you are human Harry,
you hurt, and you cry and get angry. You are just like the rest of us. You don't have to put
on a face for me Harry, you can show me yourself. You can cry on my shoulder, as I have
on yours." Hermoine said quietly.
With these last words Harry felt his last defense against his emotion crumble. He felt all
the pain he had been feeling rise to the surface, and try as he might, he felt the tears come
too. He finally gave into it all and let them come. He began crying, softly, quietly, letting
the tears flow down his face silently. Hermoine pulled him to her, and although he resisted
slightly, he gave in as Hermoine clutched his head to her chest. Harry let the emotions
pour out of his body then, giving in to his pain. He began to openly sob, as did Hermoine.
Hermoine whispered, "It's OK Harry, I'm here, go ahead and cry. It's OK I'm not going
anywhere."
The two remained in that position for some time. Silently crying and holding each other,
until all the tears had been cried and all the pain had been relinquished. After the crying
ended, Harry raised up and looked into Hermoine's eyes. Both Hermoine's and Harry's
eyes were tear stained and red, but finally both were full of emotion.
"I love you Hermoine, with everything I have." Harry had said quietly, almost in a
whisper.
"And I love you Harry, with more than I have." Hermoine said back.
Harry smiled, "You always have to try and outdo me huh?"
Hermoine just laughed quietly, "Well you know, I do what I can."
"You just remember who is in charge of this group." Harry said with a smile.
Hermoine laughed again, "The only reason we voted you our leader is cause you are
famous."
"Oh really? Darn, and here I thought it was based on my looks." Harry said with
mock-disappointment.
Hermoine replied, "Nah......if you it were based on your look, you'd be Minister of Magic
by now."
"Why Miss Hermoine Granger, are you hitting on me?" Harry said.
Hermoine replied with a smile, "I do believe I am."
"Well thank the lord, I thought I was going to have to hit on you." Harry said.
They both smiled as their lips met in the first kiss the two had shared in days. The kissed
quietly for awhile. Then the parted and looked at each other, both reading each other's
intentions in their eyes. Without a word Harry grabbed Hermoine's hand and lead her
upstairs, But the two did not go into the normal dorms, they went into the old Girl's
dormitories, they needed their privacy that night.
*************
A/N: Yes I know this chapter was completely void of anything to do with the plot, but I
just needed something to get started on. The following chapters will be moving on with
the plot, but I felt as if this chapter was necessary. Do not fear, the 2nd part of my series
will continue on. I have big plans for the story and I promise you will not be disappointed.
Thanks, Please Review!!!
In the days following the death of Albus Dumbledore, every person in the Order had
shown a different reaction. Most cried, and most screamed and cursed.
Ron had screamed off in the direction that Voldemort had fled, yelling as many curse
words as he could think of, all the while tears beginning to stream down his face. Michelle
had comforted him, crying herself, as he screamed, and soon the couple had sat together,
crying. James had simply walked back into the castle, assumingly to go play his guitar, and
cry to himself, where no one could see him. All of the senior members of the Order had
put on a strong face at first, just for the younger members, but all had cried to themselves
that night, in their separate rooms. Hermoine's family hadn't cried, they didn't know
Dumbledore, but had conveyed their condolences to the rest of the group, and had each
seemed deeply saddened. Hermoine had burst into tears, and remained that way for several
hours. Even Draco Malfoy had shed some silent tears as he helped to carry Dumbledore's
body back to the castle.
Yes, it seemed as everyone close to Dumbledore had cried that day, everyone with the
exception of Harry. Harry had always been the core of the group. The rock that the others
looked to for strength. So Harry played that roll he assumed he should. He had been the
one to place Dumbledore's body into his study, for safe keeping until the funeral. It had
been he who held Hermoine for hours as she cried. It had been he would had sent letters
to several important people, informing them of the tragedy, and telling them it would be
for the best to keep it under-wraps for the time being. Harry had consoled every single
person who had came to him crying that first night, but he himself had not shed a tear. He
couldn't. He felt as if it was he who must not cry, He could not show that weakness now.
It was he who must remain strong for everyone. He must not show that he was hurting,
even if he felt as though he would pass out at times from the pain he felt in his heart.
Several days passed, and the occupants of Hogwarts started acting semi-normal once
again. While the laughs were few and far between, there were actually a few smiles that
could be seen around the castle. Yes it felt as though things might start getting back to
something close to normal, if it wasn't for Harry that is. Harry hadn't cried, laughed,
weeped, cursed, gotten angry, or showed any emotion of any kind since Dumbledore's
death. He didn't even show any affection to Hermoine, his love. While the group all slept
in the same room, and consequently, Hermoine had slept in Harry's bed, Harry had not
said one word of "Love" to Hermoine since Dumbledore's death. She had told him that she
loved him countless times, and he had returned that phrase, but with no feeling, almost as
if he were automated to respond. Hermoine noticed this of course, but just ignored it,
assuming Harry had just felt awful and wasn't in the mood to show affection. At least
Hermoine ignored it for the first week.
It had been 6 days since the death of Dumbledore, and Harry still hadn't came out of the
trance he appeared to be in. He didn't eat much, didn't talk much, he really didn't do
anything much. While the rest of the group had began to return to normal, Harry just sat
around all day, not doing much of anything. Sure he had organized the funeral, and
subsequently been the one to deal with the burying of Dumbledore, but he had not shown
a single ounce of emotion. And frankly Hermoine was getting tired of it.
After dinner on the 6th night, everyone had retreated to the Gryffindor common room, to
simply lounge about before bed. The day's studies had been rigorous for Ron, Hermoine,
Caty, James, and Malfoy. Harry of course not having to study because of his previous
training. Harry had sat down on the couch in front of the fire, seemingly content with
sitting there until time to go to bed. Hermoine had came and sat beside him, hoping for
some sign of affection. She had laid her head on his shoulder, hoping he would wrap his
arm around her, like he used to, but Harry didn't. He just sat there, staring at the fire.
Hermoine decided to try once more to see if she could get a reaction out of Harry. He laid
her arm across his chest and snuggled into the nape of his neck, but yet still, no reaction.
"Well that does it." Thought Hermoine to herself, "I am tired of this."
Hermoine straightened herself up and cleared her throat to get Harry's attention. He
turned his head to her, the same blank face still on that he had had on for days.
"What in the hell is you problem?" Hermoine had asked, clearly pissed off.
"I have no problem." Harry had replied simply.
Hermoine sighed loudly, "Well then why in the hell are you acting this way toward me?"
"Acting what way?" Harry had asked, dumbfounded.
"Like I am nothing to you anymore, you have shown me no affection, no sign of love,
NOTHING!" She had practically yelled the last part, in which the attention's of everyone
else in the common room had been attracted.
"What in the hell are you talking about?" Asked Harry, becoming pissed off.
Hermoine's eyes had blazed red, "The fact that ever since Dumbledore passed, you have
not give me one single sign of affection. Nothing. Haven't even held my hand. Haven't told
me you loved me and sounded as if you meant it, haven't even kissed me. So I say again,
What in the hell is your problem?"
Harry had become enraged at the mention of Dumbledore's name, "I'm sorry if the death
of my mentor has cause me not to want to be all over you all the time. I'm sorry if his
death has upset me. I'm sorry if I'm not being what you want right now, but you know
what? Too damned bad."
"Harry Potter, you are not the only one who lost someone. Every fucking person here was
attached to Dumbledore, and no one else has decided that they should recede into a shell
and not act alive anymore. If you are so hurt by his death, why have you not even cried,
huh Harry? And where do you get off acting like I want you all over me? A simple sign of
affection is all I want Harry, a simple hand holding, or kiss goodnight, or simply telling me
you loved me, is that so much to ask?" Hermoine had practically screamed, at this, the
other occupants of common room had decided that they would rather be somewhere else
right that moment.
Harry turned his head at these remarks.
Hermoine sighed again, then said in a smaller, shallower tone, "Just tell me Harry, why are
you acting this way?"
Harry finally gave up, "I'm just trying to be strong Hermoine. I'm trying to be the person I
am supposed to be, the leader. I'm trying to be strong for everyone, including you. That's
why I haven't shown any emotion, that's why I haven't cried, that's why I haven't shown
you that I love you, I'm trying to stay strong and not be weak. I'm trying to be the leader
that Dumbledore was." Harry's voice trailed off as he spoke these last words.
"Oh Harry. You don't have to shut off the world just to be strong. You don't have to cut
me, or anyone else off from your emotions just to appear strong. It's OK to cry, it's OK to
show emotion, it's not showing weakness, it's being human. And you are human Harry,
you hurt, and you cry and get angry. You are just like the rest of us. You don't have to put
on a face for me Harry, you can show me yourself. You can cry on my shoulder, as I have
on yours." Hermoine said quietly.
With these last words Harry felt his last defense against his emotion crumble. He felt all
the pain he had been feeling rise to the surface, and try as he might, he felt the tears come
too. He finally gave into it all and let them come. He began crying, softly, quietly, letting
the tears flow down his face silently. Hermoine pulled him to her, and although he resisted
slightly, he gave in as Hermoine clutched his head to her chest. Harry let the emotions
pour out of his body then, giving in to his pain. He began to openly sob, as did Hermoine.
Hermoine whispered, "It's OK Harry, I'm here, go ahead and cry. It's OK I'm not going
anywhere."
The two remained in that position for some time. Silently crying and holding each other,
until all the tears had been cried and all the pain had been relinquished. After the crying
ended, Harry raised up and looked into Hermoine's eyes. Both Hermoine's and Harry's
eyes were tear stained and red, but finally both were full of emotion.
"I love you Hermoine, with everything I have." Harry had said quietly, almost in a
whisper.
"And I love you Harry, with more than I have." Hermoine said back.
Harry smiled, "You always have to try and outdo me huh?"
Hermoine just laughed quietly, "Well you know, I do what I can."
"You just remember who is in charge of this group." Harry said with a smile.
Hermoine laughed again, "The only reason we voted you our leader is cause you are
famous."
"Oh really? Darn, and here I thought it was based on my looks." Harry said with
mock-disappointment.
Hermoine replied, "Nah......if you it were based on your look, you'd be Minister of Magic
by now."
"Why Miss Hermoine Granger, are you hitting on me?" Harry said.
Hermoine replied with a smile, "I do believe I am."
"Well thank the lord, I thought I was going to have to hit on you." Harry said.
They both smiled as their lips met in the first kiss the two had shared in days. The kissed
quietly for awhile. Then the parted and looked at each other, both reading each other's
intentions in their eyes. Without a word Harry grabbed Hermoine's hand and lead her
upstairs, But the two did not go into the normal dorms, they went into the old Girl's
dormitories, they needed their privacy that night.
*************
A/N: Yes I know this chapter was completely void of anything to do with the plot, but I
just needed something to get started on. The following chapters will be moving on with
the plot, but I felt as if this chapter was necessary. Do not fear, the 2nd part of my series
will continue on. I have big plans for the story and I promise you will not be disappointed.
Thanks, Please Review!!!