DISCLAMER:
Katie: *sobs uncontrollably and hugs Legolas action figure and anything
else she has having to do with him.* I..don't.own.ANY OF THEM!!!
WAHHHHH!!!!!!
Emily: *pats Katie's shoulder, look of terror on her face* She'll be fine.I think.
Legolas: *_* Get on with it crazy fangirl.
Katie: *stops sobbing and looks up.* Oh yeah. Well, here it is. R&R peeps. Remember, if you don't, you must sleep sometime!! *cackles evilly* This is my first fanfic so don't be too harsh.Hey.COME BACK HERE ELF!!
Legolas: *tries to get away. Katie attacks and stuffs him in her backpack.*
Emily: *looks at Katie* How come I can't do that to Aragorn?
Aragorn: Because I'll kill you if you do.
Emily: Okay.*shifty glance. Stuffs unsuspecting Ranger in her backpack.*
Special Note From the Author: This fanfiction is a hazard to your health and if you are a pregnant woman or are a very small child I suggest you not read this because it may just get scary.I know the begin is a little boring, but work with me. I'll have more random outbursts and such as I go along. I hope. Oh, and, "Good morning sunshine daisies, say hello to the thunder heads waiting to strike you dead!"
This also doesn't follow the movie or story plot. It's a little bit of both really. Sometimes I just add in whatever I feel like. You don't like it, DON'T READ IT.
Chapter Three: Dying Young
"'The Door of Durin, Lord of Moria. Speak friend and enter,"" Gandalf quoted from the large door before us.
"What is that supposed to mean?" Merry asked.
"It's plain before you," Gimli said importantly. Somehow this got on my nerves. "If you are a friend, you speak the password."
"What if you're not a friend but you know the password?" I said, just to annoy the dwarf.
"That's not the point, girl," he said gruffly and I sent him a dirty look. In the next few minutes everyone but Gandalf had left to find something to do.
"Why does the water look deep but you say it's shallow?" I asked Legolas. This was another one of my stupid questions asked out of boredom.
"Because you're mind does not work like a normal person's and you see things differently," he said and sighed. We were at the gates of Moria. Just as I suspected, Gandalf didn't know the correct password. We were stuck watching the almost dry Sirannon. Emily was poking at the dirt at the edge of the water, absently writing "Wallace wuz here" in the mud. I hoped we wouldn't have to wait long till we could get in the mines. No matter what happened in there, I was sure that it was better than staying out here.
Merry and Pippen had started throwing rocks into the water. Aragorn suddenly grabbed Merry's shoulder and said quietly but firmly, "Do not disturb the water!" Emily looked scornfully at the hobbit and went back to poking the dirt.
Suddenly, Sam said, "You, girl, get away from the water. You are making me nervous, you are."
"My name is Emily, fool," Emily said straightening. "And I can do whatever I want."
"Emily," Aragorn said. "Sam is right. You shouldn't stray so close to water. Who knows what lurks under its foul surface." At this, Emily stepped away, as if she had been shocked. Grinning, I suspected she remembered the Watcher in the Water. I crept up behind her and shook her shoulders.
"I ammmmmmm the eeeeevil occccctupus!" I said in a creaky voice. She merely looked at me and raised her eyebrows.
"Somedays Katie, somedays." she said. I kicked her shin lightly then jumped away before she could inflict harm upon me.
Just then, Gandalf let out a cry. The entire Company jerked their heads over to him to see what was the matter. "Now I remember!" he said, laughing. "It's a simple riddle. 'Speak friend and enter.'" Then he spoke one word, mellon. I knew the old coot was good for something. We followed him into the dark interior of Moria.
I watched Lord of the Rings a million times on my television, but it wasn't nearly as dark as it was now. I almost ran over Frodo. That helped, but shadows still lurked around the edges of the light. As I took a look around, Gimli was telling Legolas about Moria.
"This is home of my cousin Balin, and they call it a mine, a MINE!" he said. I glanced around and the scene around me caused my stomach to begin to rebel. I refused to puke in front of the whole Company though, and I bit down my fit of nausea determinedly. What stretched before me were the remains of Dwarves and Orcs. Weapons and arrows lay scattered carelessly, as well as bones. I closed my eyes momentarily, despising Moria even more.
"This is no mine," Boromir said after a moment. Well duh. "It's a tomb. We never should have come this way. Get out!" This seemed to bring everyone back to life and we started to retreat. Just then, Frodo let out a cry. I turned and saw him being pulled away by a long gray tentacle.The Watcher in the Water.
"Oh my god!" was all Emily could mutter before she started running away. I started to follow her, but stopped, grabbing her shoulder.
"Wait, Emily. This is no time to be a wuss!"
"I'm not being a wuss!"
"Yes you are!"
"No I'm not!"
"Listen.just.shut up for a while!" As we sat there bickering, I say in the corner of my eye one of those sickly gray tentacles creeping near Emily's ankle.
"Emily! Watch out!" I cried and jumped back. Unfortunately, Emily wasn't so lucky. The tentacle wrapped itself tightly around her leg and she let out a scream as it started to pull her into the air.
Before I knew what I was doing, I jumped up and latched myself onto the arm. I struggled to hold onto it with one hand, while beating it fiercely with the other. Its other arms were flailing around me.
Suddenly, I found myself falling. I let go of the tentacle but it fell with me still. I landed on Legolas with a thud. Scrambling up, he lodged two arrows firmly in the beast's head. Boromir (still holding Frodo from when the Watcher let go of him) and Aragorn (with Emily dragging behind him) came running up behind us. Legolas grabbed me roughly from behind, shaking me out of my dazed look.
"Move mortal girl!" he cried and pulled me through the Gate. The monster was waving around, frantically trying to snatch one of us up. I scrambled forward, trying to get out of the monster's reach when the Watcher brought down the stone about the entranceway. I was breathing heavily, and could hear Emily doing the same behind me. It was too dark to tell who was where. I stood, then gingerly took a step forward, stepping on someone's foot.
"Hey!" Sam's voice came through the blackness. Suddenly, light filled the cavern from the crystal at the end of Gandalf's staff. It was slightly dim, but we could see where we were finally. Emily appeared at my elbow, her face slightly paled but she looked a great deal calmer than before.
"Well, that was exciting," she said finally into the silence. I groaned inwardly and rolled my eyes at her.
****
My head scraped against a low hanging rock again for the fourth time. When we got out of this dank cave I wouldn't have any hair left I imagines. I rubbed my skull and glared at the rock ceiling. Emily snickered behind me. I made a point of stepping on her foot in the next five minutes, and claimed it to be an accident. She needed more respect for me.
We'd been walking for at least a day in the dark gloom. I was beginning to feel depressed and tired and cranky, much due to the fact I hadn't seen the sunshine in 24 hours and hadn't had anything sugar-high in the last week. These Middle Earth people knew nothing about Hershey's or Crunch or ANYTHING. It was very depressing, but I can't say I expected it.
Suddenly, the Company halted. Gandalf looked down, not two ladies and gentlemen, but FIVE passageways at the top of a set of stairs. He looked confused and he said quietly, more to himself than anyone else, "I have no memory of this place."
We were stuck waiting for his old mind to remember the right direction. I decided it was time to take action and amuse myself. So, I said, a new inspiration coming along, "I know what is going to happen to each of you when we're done with this." Legolas gave me a look, one that said "This is another one of your jokes and I'm not falling for it." I got similar looks from Aragorn and Gimli.
Sam, on the other hand, seemed to forget about my earlier comments, and said eagerly, "What will happen to me? Will Mr. Frodo and I live happily ever after?" I smirked. This was exactly what I was hoping for.
"Well, young Samwise," I began, bowing my head, pretending to be thinking. "I know that you will grow into a male Madonna, and will forever have an attraction to other boys. Thus you shall live in sadness, without any friends because everyone is scared of you." Sam gaped at me as Emily started to laugh loudly. Legolas sighed.
"I've had enough," he said, holding out his bow. "Should me the correct position." He caught me by surprise, and I stopped laughing instantly. Like the novice I was, I took the bow from his hands. It's still felt odd, but not as much as it did the first day. I carefully placed my feet and hands in the places I though were right.
"You're left foot is too far apart from your right," he commented and nudged my foot closer to the other.
Pretty soon, the others lost interest. Aragorn dragged Emily off for more swordplay lessons. For a least an hour, Legolas criticized me on my stance and grip.
"When will I get to actually shoot something out of this?" I asked.
"When you can properly hold it," was his answer, a grin following it. I scowled back.
"Why? It's not like I'm going to kill anyone."
"I doubt that very much."
"Please? Does this look like the face of a murderer?" I asked, putting on my most pitiful face.
"Yes," he said dryly, but his eyes laughing. I continued to argue with him like this for a moment or two. I wasn't getting anywhere, but all the same, arguing with only Emily gets tiresome. We don't even argue really. Just sort of.debate very intensely. This is what I was doing at the moment. I didn't have any hope in winning it, but it was amusing all the same.
Ten minutes later, Emily came and tugged on my shirtsleeve. I was still at it, trying to at least be able to at least put an arrow on the bow and not shoot it. She was very persistent, so I thought that whatever she wanted to tell me must be important. I let her shove me over to the edge of the cliff we were at, and point downward. A dark shape was scrambling among the rocks. A grin slowly spread onto my face.
Gollum.
We both have our favorite characters on Lord of the Rings, and Gollum is one of those special ones. How can you not love him? I mean, sure, he tries to kill Frodo, but it's that *beep* ring. And when he's Smeagol he's so nice. When Sam calls him Stinker and Sneaker it makes me irritated even more with the fat hobbit, because he never gets to see Gollum's good side.
Right now, I was about to open my mouth when a hand was clamped over it. I turned around to see Aragorn looking scornfully at us.
"What are you doing?" he asked, frowning.
"Trying to get a meeting with Gollum!" I replied as though it were obvious.
"Do you know," he said. "How dangerous he is?"
"Of course. But that doesn't mean he's pure evil," Emily stated. I nodded in agreement. Aragorn looked irritated.
"He is cunning and a trickster. He could kill both of you before you could even respond if he wanted to. I, personally, will not risk your lives, annoying as you both are." Though he said this as a scolding, you could tell that the guy really cared about what happened to us. At least he sounded that way. Oh my god. Could someone actually appreciate us despite our jacked up minds?
Emily: *pats Katie's shoulder, look of terror on her face* She'll be fine.I think.
Legolas: *_* Get on with it crazy fangirl.
Katie: *stops sobbing and looks up.* Oh yeah. Well, here it is. R&R peeps. Remember, if you don't, you must sleep sometime!! *cackles evilly* This is my first fanfic so don't be too harsh.Hey.COME BACK HERE ELF!!
Legolas: *tries to get away. Katie attacks and stuffs him in her backpack.*
Emily: *looks at Katie* How come I can't do that to Aragorn?
Aragorn: Because I'll kill you if you do.
Emily: Okay.*shifty glance. Stuffs unsuspecting Ranger in her backpack.*
Special Note From the Author: This fanfiction is a hazard to your health and if you are a pregnant woman or are a very small child I suggest you not read this because it may just get scary.I know the begin is a little boring, but work with me. I'll have more random outbursts and such as I go along. I hope. Oh, and, "Good morning sunshine daisies, say hello to the thunder heads waiting to strike you dead!"
This also doesn't follow the movie or story plot. It's a little bit of both really. Sometimes I just add in whatever I feel like. You don't like it, DON'T READ IT.
Chapter Three: Dying Young
"'The Door of Durin, Lord of Moria. Speak friend and enter,"" Gandalf quoted from the large door before us.
"What is that supposed to mean?" Merry asked.
"It's plain before you," Gimli said importantly. Somehow this got on my nerves. "If you are a friend, you speak the password."
"What if you're not a friend but you know the password?" I said, just to annoy the dwarf.
"That's not the point, girl," he said gruffly and I sent him a dirty look. In the next few minutes everyone but Gandalf had left to find something to do.
"Why does the water look deep but you say it's shallow?" I asked Legolas. This was another one of my stupid questions asked out of boredom.
"Because you're mind does not work like a normal person's and you see things differently," he said and sighed. We were at the gates of Moria. Just as I suspected, Gandalf didn't know the correct password. We were stuck watching the almost dry Sirannon. Emily was poking at the dirt at the edge of the water, absently writing "Wallace wuz here" in the mud. I hoped we wouldn't have to wait long till we could get in the mines. No matter what happened in there, I was sure that it was better than staying out here.
Merry and Pippen had started throwing rocks into the water. Aragorn suddenly grabbed Merry's shoulder and said quietly but firmly, "Do not disturb the water!" Emily looked scornfully at the hobbit and went back to poking the dirt.
Suddenly, Sam said, "You, girl, get away from the water. You are making me nervous, you are."
"My name is Emily, fool," Emily said straightening. "And I can do whatever I want."
"Emily," Aragorn said. "Sam is right. You shouldn't stray so close to water. Who knows what lurks under its foul surface." At this, Emily stepped away, as if she had been shocked. Grinning, I suspected she remembered the Watcher in the Water. I crept up behind her and shook her shoulders.
"I ammmmmmm the eeeeevil occccctupus!" I said in a creaky voice. She merely looked at me and raised her eyebrows.
"Somedays Katie, somedays." she said. I kicked her shin lightly then jumped away before she could inflict harm upon me.
Just then, Gandalf let out a cry. The entire Company jerked their heads over to him to see what was the matter. "Now I remember!" he said, laughing. "It's a simple riddle. 'Speak friend and enter.'" Then he spoke one word, mellon. I knew the old coot was good for something. We followed him into the dark interior of Moria.
I watched Lord of the Rings a million times on my television, but it wasn't nearly as dark as it was now. I almost ran over Frodo. That helped, but shadows still lurked around the edges of the light. As I took a look around, Gimli was telling Legolas about Moria.
"This is home of my cousin Balin, and they call it a mine, a MINE!" he said. I glanced around and the scene around me caused my stomach to begin to rebel. I refused to puke in front of the whole Company though, and I bit down my fit of nausea determinedly. What stretched before me were the remains of Dwarves and Orcs. Weapons and arrows lay scattered carelessly, as well as bones. I closed my eyes momentarily, despising Moria even more.
"This is no mine," Boromir said after a moment. Well duh. "It's a tomb. We never should have come this way. Get out!" This seemed to bring everyone back to life and we started to retreat. Just then, Frodo let out a cry. I turned and saw him being pulled away by a long gray tentacle.The Watcher in the Water.
"Oh my god!" was all Emily could mutter before she started running away. I started to follow her, but stopped, grabbing her shoulder.
"Wait, Emily. This is no time to be a wuss!"
"I'm not being a wuss!"
"Yes you are!"
"No I'm not!"
"Listen.just.shut up for a while!" As we sat there bickering, I say in the corner of my eye one of those sickly gray tentacles creeping near Emily's ankle.
"Emily! Watch out!" I cried and jumped back. Unfortunately, Emily wasn't so lucky. The tentacle wrapped itself tightly around her leg and she let out a scream as it started to pull her into the air.
Before I knew what I was doing, I jumped up and latched myself onto the arm. I struggled to hold onto it with one hand, while beating it fiercely with the other. Its other arms were flailing around me.
Suddenly, I found myself falling. I let go of the tentacle but it fell with me still. I landed on Legolas with a thud. Scrambling up, he lodged two arrows firmly in the beast's head. Boromir (still holding Frodo from when the Watcher let go of him) and Aragorn (with Emily dragging behind him) came running up behind us. Legolas grabbed me roughly from behind, shaking me out of my dazed look.
"Move mortal girl!" he cried and pulled me through the Gate. The monster was waving around, frantically trying to snatch one of us up. I scrambled forward, trying to get out of the monster's reach when the Watcher brought down the stone about the entranceway. I was breathing heavily, and could hear Emily doing the same behind me. It was too dark to tell who was where. I stood, then gingerly took a step forward, stepping on someone's foot.
"Hey!" Sam's voice came through the blackness. Suddenly, light filled the cavern from the crystal at the end of Gandalf's staff. It was slightly dim, but we could see where we were finally. Emily appeared at my elbow, her face slightly paled but she looked a great deal calmer than before.
"Well, that was exciting," she said finally into the silence. I groaned inwardly and rolled my eyes at her.
****
My head scraped against a low hanging rock again for the fourth time. When we got out of this dank cave I wouldn't have any hair left I imagines. I rubbed my skull and glared at the rock ceiling. Emily snickered behind me. I made a point of stepping on her foot in the next five minutes, and claimed it to be an accident. She needed more respect for me.
We'd been walking for at least a day in the dark gloom. I was beginning to feel depressed and tired and cranky, much due to the fact I hadn't seen the sunshine in 24 hours and hadn't had anything sugar-high in the last week. These Middle Earth people knew nothing about Hershey's or Crunch or ANYTHING. It was very depressing, but I can't say I expected it.
Suddenly, the Company halted. Gandalf looked down, not two ladies and gentlemen, but FIVE passageways at the top of a set of stairs. He looked confused and he said quietly, more to himself than anyone else, "I have no memory of this place."
We were stuck waiting for his old mind to remember the right direction. I decided it was time to take action and amuse myself. So, I said, a new inspiration coming along, "I know what is going to happen to each of you when we're done with this." Legolas gave me a look, one that said "This is another one of your jokes and I'm not falling for it." I got similar looks from Aragorn and Gimli.
Sam, on the other hand, seemed to forget about my earlier comments, and said eagerly, "What will happen to me? Will Mr. Frodo and I live happily ever after?" I smirked. This was exactly what I was hoping for.
"Well, young Samwise," I began, bowing my head, pretending to be thinking. "I know that you will grow into a male Madonna, and will forever have an attraction to other boys. Thus you shall live in sadness, without any friends because everyone is scared of you." Sam gaped at me as Emily started to laugh loudly. Legolas sighed.
"I've had enough," he said, holding out his bow. "Should me the correct position." He caught me by surprise, and I stopped laughing instantly. Like the novice I was, I took the bow from his hands. It's still felt odd, but not as much as it did the first day. I carefully placed my feet and hands in the places I though were right.
"You're left foot is too far apart from your right," he commented and nudged my foot closer to the other.
Pretty soon, the others lost interest. Aragorn dragged Emily off for more swordplay lessons. For a least an hour, Legolas criticized me on my stance and grip.
"When will I get to actually shoot something out of this?" I asked.
"When you can properly hold it," was his answer, a grin following it. I scowled back.
"Why? It's not like I'm going to kill anyone."
"I doubt that very much."
"Please? Does this look like the face of a murderer?" I asked, putting on my most pitiful face.
"Yes," he said dryly, but his eyes laughing. I continued to argue with him like this for a moment or two. I wasn't getting anywhere, but all the same, arguing with only Emily gets tiresome. We don't even argue really. Just sort of.debate very intensely. This is what I was doing at the moment. I didn't have any hope in winning it, but it was amusing all the same.
Ten minutes later, Emily came and tugged on my shirtsleeve. I was still at it, trying to at least be able to at least put an arrow on the bow and not shoot it. She was very persistent, so I thought that whatever she wanted to tell me must be important. I let her shove me over to the edge of the cliff we were at, and point downward. A dark shape was scrambling among the rocks. A grin slowly spread onto my face.
Gollum.
We both have our favorite characters on Lord of the Rings, and Gollum is one of those special ones. How can you not love him? I mean, sure, he tries to kill Frodo, but it's that *beep* ring. And when he's Smeagol he's so nice. When Sam calls him Stinker and Sneaker it makes me irritated even more with the fat hobbit, because he never gets to see Gollum's good side.
Right now, I was about to open my mouth when a hand was clamped over it. I turned around to see Aragorn looking scornfully at us.
"What are you doing?" he asked, frowning.
"Trying to get a meeting with Gollum!" I replied as though it were obvious.
"Do you know," he said. "How dangerous he is?"
"Of course. But that doesn't mean he's pure evil," Emily stated. I nodded in agreement. Aragorn looked irritated.
"He is cunning and a trickster. He could kill both of you before you could even respond if he wanted to. I, personally, will not risk your lives, annoying as you both are." Though he said this as a scolding, you could tell that the guy really cared about what happened to us. At least he sounded that way. Oh my god. Could someone actually appreciate us despite our jacked up minds?