Mistake?
Disclaimer: I own nothing. No Buffy, no Spike, no nothing.
A/N: Thank you all so much for your wonderful reviews! They mean so much to me!
****
"O-oh god. Oh, no. No, no, no, no." Buffy said quickly as she moved from her seat. She spoke to herself quietly, wiping her mouth. She quickly walked passed Spike, making sure not to make eye contact.
Spike just sat quietly, his undead heart slowly breaking. She had kissed him. He kissed her back. It was passionate, desperate, but it ended and now she was disgusted with herself. Yeah, he really had a way with women, he thought as he maneuvered off his seat. But still he couldn't help but feel that she had felt something in that kiss. It might not have been love, but there was something there. The way she had wrapped herself around him, so tight. It felt almost as if she needed him. The way the heat of her body had made him feel almost alive, it was like . . . magic.
He heard them talking in the hall, something about Giles and research. Nothing too big, but being the evil, soul1ess monster that he was he joined them anyway.
"So, what's the big bad now?" Spike asked. He looked around from face to face, and when he caught Buffy's eye she quickly averted them so she was looking at the floor. He noticed she was wringing her hands nervously and it made him wonder . . . could she have wanted him? Could she have wanted to finish what they started? He smirked a little and saw her cheeks flush, which made him smirk even larger.
Xander noticed the interaction between the two, but chose to ignore it.
"What's evil dead doing here?" Xander asked.
Spike looked over at Buffy and saw the look of worry that played across her face.
"Just a little post patrol conversation. That a problem for you, mate?" He asked looking over at Xander.
"As a matter of fact, I . . . nevermind. I don't have time to stand and argue with you. I'm tired, I'm going home." Xander turned to Buffy, "You want me to take him out with me?" Xander asked, glancing over at Spike.
"Uh, no. It, uh, it's alright." Buffy said quietly.
"Alright, so tomorrow, seven, Giles' place." Xander nodded at Buffy before exiting.
Spike stood still for a moment no sure what to say. It was just them, again. All alone. Buffy walked slowly into the living room and began picking up a few odds and ends. Spike followed her, and tucking his hands in his pockets he spoke.
"Look, Buffy. About before, I . . . it was a moment and I---"
"Just forget about it." Buffy said.
"I'm sorry." He said, loud but soft in tone. "Y-you were upset and I took advantage of that. I didn't mean to . . . I'm sorry."
For the first time since they had had their little moment, Buffy looked him in the eye. "It was a mistake. You know that, right?"
"I do." He told her. He said it quickly, but still he felt a pain rise in his chest. He couldn't remember a time when he had hurt so bad, not even after Dru left him. Of course he hadn't loved Dru the way he loved Buffy. But to have the woman you love kiss you, then take it back . . . it killed him.
"I better go then." He said softly.
"Yeah." She whispered. "But thank you . . . for what you said. I-it, uh, it meant a lot."
Spike couldn't help but smile, "Anytime, luv."
Spike walked out the door and before she closed it he turned around. He was about to say something when her fist collided with his jaw, sending him stumbling back a bit.
"Bloody hell! What'd you do that for?" He asked, confused out of his mind.
"Because if anybody ever finds out about this . . . *you* kissed *me*." She said. She couldn't help but look at the confusion that played across his features and smile shyly. She watched as he smiled back and nodded his head in understanding.
"Right." He said before turning to leave.
Buffy smiled as she watched him leave. She shut the door and, immediately, her mind began to race.
A mistake? She said it had been a mistake, but was it really? The way he had made her feel, the way he had held her. It felt so right when she had been in his arms. She shuddered as she remembered the way his cool tongue battled with hers and the way his fingers danced through her hair. They had fit so perfectly. The heat of her body pressed up against his cold figure almost made her feel as if they were melting together, and it felt right there. He made her feel wanted, desirable. And the way everything fell away from them in that one moment, it was like . . . magic.
She plopped down on the sofa and remembered what he had said:
'You could be in love right now, and not even know it. It's amazing, but you can work with, or hate, a person for years before realizing that you don't truly hate them. That everything you've felt was powered by love, everything you've done.'
It seemed to fit their situation perfectly but it couldn't be. Spike, in love with her? Never. He was probably laughing to himself right as she thought. And she didn't love him, which she was sure of. She couldn't love him because it would never work. It was impossible, insane, immoral . . . ironic? No, it was not ironic because she didn't love him, so there for there is no irony in a situation that was completely *not* ironic.
"Buffy!?"
"What!?" Buffy snapped as she jumped off the couch.
"Jeez, jumpy much?" Dawn said as she through her bag down. "Look, I ran into Spike-"
"So." Buffy said quickly.
"What?" Dawn asked.
"Huh?"
"Buffy, what is your problem?" Dawn asked.
"Nothing. Nevermind. Um, what were you saying?" She rambled.
"Okay, um, I ran into Spike," Dawn paused to see if her sister would say anything, but Buffy just smiled, "and he said something about research. I figured you wouldn't want me going and I also figured you wouldn't want me staying here alone so I asked him to come and 'baby-sit' me. So, to sum up while you're researching Spike will be here." Dawn finished.
"I don't care." Buffy said defensively. She cringed to herself right after she had said it. What was her problem? Oh yeah, maybe it was that she kissed Spike, he kissed her back and now these feelings surfaced that she never knew she had. Yeah, that was it.
She took a deep breath and gained her composure. She was ready now, whatever Dawn had to say about Spike she could handle.
"Buffy? What is wrong with you? I mention Spike and you get all defensive-y on me." Dawn's face lit up, "are you two having a fling type . . . thing?"
Buffy could handle anything . . . expect that. "No." She snapped. "Now go to bed." Dawn began to speak but Buffy shushed her with a look that read 'don't mess with me'. After Dawn was upstairs Buffy flopped down on the sofa, again, and sighed.
She was in big trouble.
*****
Sorry, I know this one was kinda short, but at least I got it done. I haven't really found time to work on my fics because of school, but it snowed today! So, we have a snow day and I thought, 'what better to do with my time than work on my fic. What? Actual school work? Nah, that can wait till later.'
Reviews? Anybody? Please?
Disclaimer: I own nothing. No Buffy, no Spike, no nothing.
A/N: Thank you all so much for your wonderful reviews! They mean so much to me!
****
"O-oh god. Oh, no. No, no, no, no." Buffy said quickly as she moved from her seat. She spoke to herself quietly, wiping her mouth. She quickly walked passed Spike, making sure not to make eye contact.
Spike just sat quietly, his undead heart slowly breaking. She had kissed him. He kissed her back. It was passionate, desperate, but it ended and now she was disgusted with herself. Yeah, he really had a way with women, he thought as he maneuvered off his seat. But still he couldn't help but feel that she had felt something in that kiss. It might not have been love, but there was something there. The way she had wrapped herself around him, so tight. It felt almost as if she needed him. The way the heat of her body had made him feel almost alive, it was like . . . magic.
He heard them talking in the hall, something about Giles and research. Nothing too big, but being the evil, soul1ess monster that he was he joined them anyway.
"So, what's the big bad now?" Spike asked. He looked around from face to face, and when he caught Buffy's eye she quickly averted them so she was looking at the floor. He noticed she was wringing her hands nervously and it made him wonder . . . could she have wanted him? Could she have wanted to finish what they started? He smirked a little and saw her cheeks flush, which made him smirk even larger.
Xander noticed the interaction between the two, but chose to ignore it.
"What's evil dead doing here?" Xander asked.
Spike looked over at Buffy and saw the look of worry that played across her face.
"Just a little post patrol conversation. That a problem for you, mate?" He asked looking over at Xander.
"As a matter of fact, I . . . nevermind. I don't have time to stand and argue with you. I'm tired, I'm going home." Xander turned to Buffy, "You want me to take him out with me?" Xander asked, glancing over at Spike.
"Uh, no. It, uh, it's alright." Buffy said quietly.
"Alright, so tomorrow, seven, Giles' place." Xander nodded at Buffy before exiting.
Spike stood still for a moment no sure what to say. It was just them, again. All alone. Buffy walked slowly into the living room and began picking up a few odds and ends. Spike followed her, and tucking his hands in his pockets he spoke.
"Look, Buffy. About before, I . . . it was a moment and I---"
"Just forget about it." Buffy said.
"I'm sorry." He said, loud but soft in tone. "Y-you were upset and I took advantage of that. I didn't mean to . . . I'm sorry."
For the first time since they had had their little moment, Buffy looked him in the eye. "It was a mistake. You know that, right?"
"I do." He told her. He said it quickly, but still he felt a pain rise in his chest. He couldn't remember a time when he had hurt so bad, not even after Dru left him. Of course he hadn't loved Dru the way he loved Buffy. But to have the woman you love kiss you, then take it back . . . it killed him.
"I better go then." He said softly.
"Yeah." She whispered. "But thank you . . . for what you said. I-it, uh, it meant a lot."
Spike couldn't help but smile, "Anytime, luv."
Spike walked out the door and before she closed it he turned around. He was about to say something when her fist collided with his jaw, sending him stumbling back a bit.
"Bloody hell! What'd you do that for?" He asked, confused out of his mind.
"Because if anybody ever finds out about this . . . *you* kissed *me*." She said. She couldn't help but look at the confusion that played across his features and smile shyly. She watched as he smiled back and nodded his head in understanding.
"Right." He said before turning to leave.
Buffy smiled as she watched him leave. She shut the door and, immediately, her mind began to race.
A mistake? She said it had been a mistake, but was it really? The way he had made her feel, the way he had held her. It felt so right when she had been in his arms. She shuddered as she remembered the way his cool tongue battled with hers and the way his fingers danced through her hair. They had fit so perfectly. The heat of her body pressed up against his cold figure almost made her feel as if they were melting together, and it felt right there. He made her feel wanted, desirable. And the way everything fell away from them in that one moment, it was like . . . magic.
She plopped down on the sofa and remembered what he had said:
'You could be in love right now, and not even know it. It's amazing, but you can work with, or hate, a person for years before realizing that you don't truly hate them. That everything you've felt was powered by love, everything you've done.'
It seemed to fit their situation perfectly but it couldn't be. Spike, in love with her? Never. He was probably laughing to himself right as she thought. And she didn't love him, which she was sure of. She couldn't love him because it would never work. It was impossible, insane, immoral . . . ironic? No, it was not ironic because she didn't love him, so there for there is no irony in a situation that was completely *not* ironic.
"Buffy!?"
"What!?" Buffy snapped as she jumped off the couch.
"Jeez, jumpy much?" Dawn said as she through her bag down. "Look, I ran into Spike-"
"So." Buffy said quickly.
"What?" Dawn asked.
"Huh?"
"Buffy, what is your problem?" Dawn asked.
"Nothing. Nevermind. Um, what were you saying?" She rambled.
"Okay, um, I ran into Spike," Dawn paused to see if her sister would say anything, but Buffy just smiled, "and he said something about research. I figured you wouldn't want me going and I also figured you wouldn't want me staying here alone so I asked him to come and 'baby-sit' me. So, to sum up while you're researching Spike will be here." Dawn finished.
"I don't care." Buffy said defensively. She cringed to herself right after she had said it. What was her problem? Oh yeah, maybe it was that she kissed Spike, he kissed her back and now these feelings surfaced that she never knew she had. Yeah, that was it.
She took a deep breath and gained her composure. She was ready now, whatever Dawn had to say about Spike she could handle.
"Buffy? What is wrong with you? I mention Spike and you get all defensive-y on me." Dawn's face lit up, "are you two having a fling type . . . thing?"
Buffy could handle anything . . . expect that. "No." She snapped. "Now go to bed." Dawn began to speak but Buffy shushed her with a look that read 'don't mess with me'. After Dawn was upstairs Buffy flopped down on the sofa, again, and sighed.
She was in big trouble.
*****
Sorry, I know this one was kinda short, but at least I got it done. I haven't really found time to work on my fics because of school, but it snowed today! So, we have a snow day and I thought, 'what better to do with my time than work on my fic. What? Actual school work? Nah, that can wait till later.'
Reviews? Anybody? Please?