Disclaimer: I do not own The Lord of the Rings. It belongs
to J.R.R. Tolkien.
Author's Note:
GO RAIDERS!
Set It Off!
The Master, the Fat-Hobbit, and the Tall-Hobbit had been following Smeagol for quite some time. The Tall-Hobbit had lost count of how many suns had faded and how many moons had died since she woke up at the bottom of that boat, which was actually heading towards Emyn Muil. Fortunately, the Master and the Fat-Hobbit were also in the boat with her, and had been her hope of survival.
"Some fellowship," muttered the Fat-Hobbit. "It's only you an' me, Mister Frodo. Poor C-chan has to tag along with us... like that Gollum you have skittering about. Why do you trust him anyway, Mister Frodo?"
"He's a good person at heart," replied the Master. "I'm sure we can trust him. He's got his life bent on the Ring."
"All've our lives are bent on the Ring," said the Tall-Hobbit softly. "That's why I need--"
"No more napsess, Tall-Hobbit," hissed Smeagol. "Wait 'till Yellowface goes down the mountain. She won't bother us then. Nasty Yellowface she is."
The Tall-Hobbit yawned and frowned, slouching as she continued to crawl across the rocks of Emyn Muil, which were starting to show small clumps of grass every few yards or so. A new territory was not far away.
"I'm so... slee-eepy-y..."
Thud.
"Stupid, Tall-Hobbit!" growled Smeagol, his pale face scrunching into a scowling expression. "Alwayses falling into slumber! Get her up! Get her up!"
Only the Fat-Hobbit was able to do any work, so he nudged the Tall-Hobbit and pushed her up into a sitting position. The Tall-Hobbit yawned and blinked for a moment, but then plopped over to sleep again. And by the disgruntled look on the Fat-Hobbit's face, this journey to the Black Gate was going to be much further than he thought it would be.
~*~
"That isn't a Halfling!" shouted one orc, pointing at Megan with a gnarled finger. "She's much too tall to be one of them! I say we eat her! Now!"
"But her hair is like the others," argued another orc. "She might actually be a very long Halfling!"
"I say we eat them anyway!" cried a third.
"We've only had the same maggoty bread for three stinking days!"
"Quit your whining! You've said that twice already!"
"What about their legs?" inquired the first orc with a somewhat maniacal grin. "They don't need those." His eyes flashed with a wild hunger. "Oh, they look tasty!"
"They are not for eating!" roared Ugluk.
A tear streamed down Jackie's cheek and fell to the earth in a wet splash. Megan had been knocked unconscious during the terribly uncomfortable ride. She automatically knew that it was definitely not a good idea to take the 'Orc Express' if was ever an option to her again. The foul smell of the napes of their filthy necks still clung to her nose, and what a horrid aroma it was. Pippin was horrified and staring at Merry, occasionally looking out to the west. Jackie did the same, in hope of seeing something wildly impossible to come and save her. What if Gandalf fell out of the sky and saved them? It would do if Naurglahad came running like a madman and killed every monster in sight. Anything to save...
A spleen came flying at her and collided against her sleeve. A streak of orc blood stained her tunic. Another organ came flying and thwacked Megan in the head. She did not wake. Jackie slowly turned with a wince to observe the new scene. Dinner was served for the Uruk-hai; and just to make it better, she made an awesome discovery!
Orcs are cannibals.
~*~
Gimli had a glint of unsureness in his eyes. Was handing Naurglahad over to Eowyn too much? She was already a lot for himself and his fellow hunters -- nay -- for the whole fellowship of the Ring, she was a lot to take care of! The dwarf sighed and looked behind him to see how many bones Eowyn might have broken.
"Great, Aule! This isn't fair!"
Eowyn and Naurglahad looked very comfortable and very pleasant together, both with a good smile on their faces and laughing like any other female would. In fact, Naurglahad, who had just asked Eowyn some random increment (which Gimli suspected might be something ever-feminine) was looking like a well-nurtured, specifically normal young child, and a somewhat sophisticated one at that! She was walking with a relaxed, yet straight posture for once, instead of her usual hunched shoulders and uptight arms. Her eyes were happy and her lips were smiling and...
"She probably won't last that long," thought Gimli with a grim expression on his face. "There is no way that such a Hell-raiser would be so enlightened forever."
~*~
"You were both right and wrong," said Legolas calmly as he helped Gimli up on a horse. The dwarf was claiming that his legs were about to fall off. Legolas paused in his advice to observe Gimli looking down at his reflection in the shallow lake they were passing by. Apparently, the dwarf had not often seen himself on a full-grown horse before. "No happiness will last forever, but from my long years I have known that it can last for a very long ti--"
Sploosh!
The familiar taunting laughter approached the elf's ears. As he wiped a random sea weed out of his face, Legolas did not need to make an effort to spot a cackling Naurglahad pointing at him as she stood at the edge of the lake. No doubt she had jumped on him and knocked him over into the water. But as she laughed till she reddened, Eowyn paused to whisper something in her ear. Immediately, Naurglahad paled and stopped laughing. She shot Eowyn an embarrassed and uncomfortable look, but Eowyn only nodded. The sixteen-year-old spat in the dirt and kicked at the earth for a bit.
Then she offered Legolas her hand.
"I'm so-o-orry-y..." she muttered painfully, as if an apology was the most difficult thing to say ever. Legolas looked at her suspiciously and sat in the lake without movement. "Oh, get over it, stupid elf! I'm trying to h-h-help y-you..." She was twitching like her tongue has burning. "Ergh!"
Legolas pressed his lips together before taking her hand and grasping it firmly.
"Don't hold onto my hand forever!" she shouted. People were starting to turn.
Splash!
"I did know you were going to do that!"
"Then you should not have offered me help."
"Eowyn told me to!"
"That's odd. You obey a sensible person's command for once."
"There was a consequence."
Naurglahad's eyes glazed with a sparkle of innocence for a few moments. Legolas did not know whether to be paralyzed by it or scream in terror.
Pow!
Well, the innocence did not last long. For soon, Naurglahad had pounced on Legolas and made an attempt to strangle him by the neck. The elf only had one choice: to fight back. But to his surprise, the child was a much better wrestler than he thought she was. Only his masculinity could save him now. Gimli's eyes looked as if they were going to pop out of his sockets. He turned to call for Eowyn, but he faltered when he saw her leaning on Aragorn's shoulder to make sure she wouldn't topple over in laughter.
Author's Note:
GO RAIDERS!
Set It Off!
The Master, the Fat-Hobbit, and the Tall-Hobbit had been following Smeagol for quite some time. The Tall-Hobbit had lost count of how many suns had faded and how many moons had died since she woke up at the bottom of that boat, which was actually heading towards Emyn Muil. Fortunately, the Master and the Fat-Hobbit were also in the boat with her, and had been her hope of survival.
"Some fellowship," muttered the Fat-Hobbit. "It's only you an' me, Mister Frodo. Poor C-chan has to tag along with us... like that Gollum you have skittering about. Why do you trust him anyway, Mister Frodo?"
"He's a good person at heart," replied the Master. "I'm sure we can trust him. He's got his life bent on the Ring."
"All've our lives are bent on the Ring," said the Tall-Hobbit softly. "That's why I need--"
"No more napsess, Tall-Hobbit," hissed Smeagol. "Wait 'till Yellowface goes down the mountain. She won't bother us then. Nasty Yellowface she is."
The Tall-Hobbit yawned and frowned, slouching as she continued to crawl across the rocks of Emyn Muil, which were starting to show small clumps of grass every few yards or so. A new territory was not far away.
"I'm so... slee-eepy-y..."
Thud.
"Stupid, Tall-Hobbit!" growled Smeagol, his pale face scrunching into a scowling expression. "Alwayses falling into slumber! Get her up! Get her up!"
Only the Fat-Hobbit was able to do any work, so he nudged the Tall-Hobbit and pushed her up into a sitting position. The Tall-Hobbit yawned and blinked for a moment, but then plopped over to sleep again. And by the disgruntled look on the Fat-Hobbit's face, this journey to the Black Gate was going to be much further than he thought it would be.
~*~
"That isn't a Halfling!" shouted one orc, pointing at Megan with a gnarled finger. "She's much too tall to be one of them! I say we eat her! Now!"
"But her hair is like the others," argued another orc. "She might actually be a very long Halfling!"
"I say we eat them anyway!" cried a third.
"We've only had the same maggoty bread for three stinking days!"
"Quit your whining! You've said that twice already!"
"What about their legs?" inquired the first orc with a somewhat maniacal grin. "They don't need those." His eyes flashed with a wild hunger. "Oh, they look tasty!"
"They are not for eating!" roared Ugluk.
A tear streamed down Jackie's cheek and fell to the earth in a wet splash. Megan had been knocked unconscious during the terribly uncomfortable ride. She automatically knew that it was definitely not a good idea to take the 'Orc Express' if was ever an option to her again. The foul smell of the napes of their filthy necks still clung to her nose, and what a horrid aroma it was. Pippin was horrified and staring at Merry, occasionally looking out to the west. Jackie did the same, in hope of seeing something wildly impossible to come and save her. What if Gandalf fell out of the sky and saved them? It would do if Naurglahad came running like a madman and killed every monster in sight. Anything to save...
A spleen came flying at her and collided against her sleeve. A streak of orc blood stained her tunic. Another organ came flying and thwacked Megan in the head. She did not wake. Jackie slowly turned with a wince to observe the new scene. Dinner was served for the Uruk-hai; and just to make it better, she made an awesome discovery!
Orcs are cannibals.
~*~
Gimli had a glint of unsureness in his eyes. Was handing Naurglahad over to Eowyn too much? She was already a lot for himself and his fellow hunters -- nay -- for the whole fellowship of the Ring, she was a lot to take care of! The dwarf sighed and looked behind him to see how many bones Eowyn might have broken.
"Great, Aule! This isn't fair!"
Eowyn and Naurglahad looked very comfortable and very pleasant together, both with a good smile on their faces and laughing like any other female would. In fact, Naurglahad, who had just asked Eowyn some random increment (which Gimli suspected might be something ever-feminine) was looking like a well-nurtured, specifically normal young child, and a somewhat sophisticated one at that! She was walking with a relaxed, yet straight posture for once, instead of her usual hunched shoulders and uptight arms. Her eyes were happy and her lips were smiling and...
"She probably won't last that long," thought Gimli with a grim expression on his face. "There is no way that such a Hell-raiser would be so enlightened forever."
~*~
"You were both right and wrong," said Legolas calmly as he helped Gimli up on a horse. The dwarf was claiming that his legs were about to fall off. Legolas paused in his advice to observe Gimli looking down at his reflection in the shallow lake they were passing by. Apparently, the dwarf had not often seen himself on a full-grown horse before. "No happiness will last forever, but from my long years I have known that it can last for a very long ti--"
Sploosh!
The familiar taunting laughter approached the elf's ears. As he wiped a random sea weed out of his face, Legolas did not need to make an effort to spot a cackling Naurglahad pointing at him as she stood at the edge of the lake. No doubt she had jumped on him and knocked him over into the water. But as she laughed till she reddened, Eowyn paused to whisper something in her ear. Immediately, Naurglahad paled and stopped laughing. She shot Eowyn an embarrassed and uncomfortable look, but Eowyn only nodded. The sixteen-year-old spat in the dirt and kicked at the earth for a bit.
Then she offered Legolas her hand.
"I'm so-o-orry-y..." she muttered painfully, as if an apology was the most difficult thing to say ever. Legolas looked at her suspiciously and sat in the lake without movement. "Oh, get over it, stupid elf! I'm trying to h-h-help y-you..." She was twitching like her tongue has burning. "Ergh!"
Legolas pressed his lips together before taking her hand and grasping it firmly.
"Don't hold onto my hand forever!" she shouted. People were starting to turn.
Splash!
"I did know you were going to do that!"
"Then you should not have offered me help."
"Eowyn told me to!"
"That's odd. You obey a sensible person's command for once."
"There was a consequence."
Naurglahad's eyes glazed with a sparkle of innocence for a few moments. Legolas did not know whether to be paralyzed by it or scream in terror.
Pow!
Well, the innocence did not last long. For soon, Naurglahad had pounced on Legolas and made an attempt to strangle him by the neck. The elf only had one choice: to fight back. But to his surprise, the child was a much better wrestler than he thought she was. Only his masculinity could save him now. Gimli's eyes looked as if they were going to pop out of his sockets. He turned to call for Eowyn, but he faltered when he saw her leaning on Aragorn's shoulder to make sure she wouldn't topple over in laughter.