Merry was asleep in his bed, though it was midday; Eowyn was sitting on a low railing in the courtyard, and Faramir was in his room, practicing his swordplay. I could see all of this from my perch atop the House of Healing's roof. A tower rose up near to the House and I rested my back against it. I closed my weary eyes. The darkness weighted so much on my soul.it was crushing me.I opened my eyes, blurry though it was, and lifted my eyes to the heavens. But its light was darkened by the shadow.

Eowyn stirred and glanced in my direction. Her keen gray eyes found me almost at once. Her face was puzzled at first, then she slowly climbed off the rail and came toward me.

"Why are you up there? It could be dangerous.with the fell winged beasts."

I smiled. "I do not fear them.though they are foul and fell.will you join me, m' lady? The view is better from here." She nodded and looked for a way up. ". If you don't mind climbing.come around to where the tower meets the House, then you may climb up the vines; don't worry, they are quite strong." She climbed up and sat down beside me. "I'm sorry if I was rude yesterday, m' lady.I shouldn't have said those things."

She smiled and nodded. She looked over the city of Gondor and past the walls onto the battlefield. A look of sorrow past over her face. Her shoulders slumped in defeat. "I could have.might have had.something.maybe." her voice trailed off as she frowned and she bowed her head.

"My lady? I'm sorry, I'm afraid I don't understand."

"It would have been better to die fighting for the King of Rohan than to be rejected." She shook her head, her golden hair falling down. She hid her face in her hands. "Have you ever been rejected, Camellia? Have you ever been rejected for the love of an.elf?"

My head snapped up, my eyes ablaze. "You mean to say that the Lord Aragorn rejected you, and that you might have found honor in dying for your King, your mother-brother?"(mother-brother is your mum's brother, who would be your uncle. It's the kind of terminology used by the Rohan's) "my lady, I do not understand that.why would you want to die? Were you that hopeless?"

Eowyn looked at me. "How did you know it was Aragorn?"

"Your eyes betray you every time you see him and they betray you now." Eowyn sighed deeply, drew her knees up to her breast and rested her chin atop her knees. "You know." I paused, not knowing whether to continue. "Lady Eowyn, I do believe that another fancies you, but the question now is, will you reject him, as you were yourself rejected?" I glanced down towards Faramir who had come out into the courtyard and now sat on the railing, looking over the city. "Farewell, for now," I whispered, catching myself before I said Namarrie. "I go to find the Sun."(*I loved when Legolas said that in the book!! Then he ran away on top of the snow ^__^) Eowyn was looking at Faramir. She glanced back up at me.

"Find me a bit of sun, pray."

"M' lady, look yonder.that may be your bit of sun." I patted her shoulder and then climbed quickly down the vines on the tower. I walked over to Faramir. "Hello, m' lord. How do you feel?"

"Much better, thank you.Camellia. It's so hard not to call you by your real name."

I smiled. "Well, I'm glad your better. Faramir.may I have your leave?"

"Yes, you have it in full. You don't have to ask."

"Thank you. Namarrie, mellon."

"Namarrie."

I walked into the House, and after awakening Merry, left for the walls. I barely heard Merry's footsteps behind me, they fell so lightly. When I turned around, Merry looked up with pleading eyes. "Please don't send me back."

I nodded. "Of course not Merry." I offered him my hand and he took it. We made our way thru the streets until we came to a small watch tower on the wall. We climbed it and settled ourselves so that we could both see thru the window. (Really a hole in the wall, but none-the-less)

We looked over the ruins of the outer walls and the field beyond the walls, stained with blood. Fire and smoke rose out of Mordor. A tear slipped out of the corner of Merry's eye. I glanced over at him. His lip quivered but he stood tall.(As tall as a Hobbit can, at least)

"If the.quest fails and the Aragorn's host falls.I shall stand to fight to protect those left in Gondor.Oh! How I wish that I had not been left behind.again." I opened my arms to him and he fell into them, crying softly.

"Your heart is noble and brave, Merry. I don't doubt that you would fight 'til your last breath is spent, and Faramir, Eowyn and I would fight by your side, you can count on that." I stoked Merry's soft, sandy-blonde curls. "We all fear for someone there."

Merry looked up at me. "Whom do you fear for?"

"My brother.well, he is like a brother very much to me. Lindir.and like you, I also fear for Pippin." I shook my head. "I still don't think that he truly understands what is going on."

Merry smiled for the first time since Pippin had left. "Yes, he is clueless, isn't he?"

"Merry, I don't have the gift of foresight, but my heart tells me that you will make it back to the Shire. So don't let your heart be burdened."

"What about your heart? You do so much for everyone.but your heart hurts too, I can see it in your eyes."

"We all hurt in some way or another, Merry, whether it is because of this war or something else."

"What is it for you then?"

I chewed my lip in thought. I didn't truly know why my heart hurt so much, or how this Hobbit could have read my emotions thru my eyes that I was hurting. "I guess.it is because my heart is being drawn to the Sea.though I don't know why since I have never seen it."

"But if you listen very hard, in the still of the night, you can hear it. I think that it is no more than a few leagues away.Anodien.why are elves drawn so to the Sea?"

"In Valinor, across that Sea, is where the elves were born, well, not all of us.and only one elf that is alive today has ever been there, was born there. That she-elf is the Lady Galadriel. She is the oldest and wisest living elf in Middle-Earth. She was the one that told me the story of our origin. Anyway.can you really hear the Sea?"

"Yes, tonight, go to the tower next to the House of Healing and climb it. Then listen. You'll hear it."

That night, Merry lead me to the highest room in the tower. I helped him climb onto the roof. As I sat there, with my eyes closed, far away, as if in some far-off dream, I could hear the faintest sound of waves breaking along that shore, the smell of the salty air.the feel of the water beneath my feet. Merry had been staring at me intently the entire time my eyes were closed. As I slowly opened them, I looked over at Merry. The Hobbit smiled sadly at me. "You heard it, didn't you?"

"Yes, Merry. And now, it makes my heart even sadder, knowing what I have been longing for."

"Does that mean you're leavin' too?"

"Not yet, Merry.no, I promise I won't leave you yet."

"Good," Merry said, pulling out his pipe and lighting it up. "I'm glad." He rested his small head on my shoulder. A tear slipped down my cheek. Thin, gray lines of smoke rose from the pipe, filling the air with the sweet fragrance of pipeweed. Merry soon nodded his head, his eyes becoming heavy with sleep. His head slide to my lap.

My throat became all choked up as I continued to run my fingers thru his locks. "Dear, sweet Merry." I whispered, kissing his brow. "Sleep now.may you never fell this despair again."

~*~ 'k, I know that no one even bothers reviewing this anymore, but all I wanna say, that even if this is corny, I started it a LONG time ago, and I just didn't ever post it. So now I'm going to post the rest of it and complete the fic.