Chapter four: All because of me
(Back at school)
School was heck for Joey. He didn't hear a thing any of the teachers
said and he didn't care. All he could think of was Mai. She filled his
every waking moment, and haunted his mind, while all his friends watched
him with worried glances.
It wasn't much better for Mai either. She laughed with her friends
when the teachers caught Joey daydreaming, but she felt sorry for him. To
be laughed at by her and her friends, especially when she saw the hurt in
his eyes when she made fun of him. In third period they were lab partners
and that was when she got a good look at him. They were only supposed to
talk about their projects that day, but Joey and Mai just sat there. Mai
looked him over and was worried with what she saw, sure she had been eating
less since their breakup, it was a natural thing that went along with
sadness, but Joey seemed to have eaten nothing. He had always been slim,
but now he looked thin and pale, and it scared her. She touched his
shoulder and he looked at her. He had new fresh bruises and cuts on his
face and she could see his dad had hurt him again before break had ended,
but worst were his eyes, they had a haunted look about them and a deep,
deep sadness. He looked away and simply said" It's of no matter". She drew
in breath sharply and snapped back "Joey you aren't eating and you are
acting suicidal and you're telling me 'It's of no matter'" He frowned and
looked down, hiding his face under his bangs "I'm just not hungry, and
besides" He said, still without the tiniest bit of emotion "If my dad hurts
me bad enough, maybe he'll kill me." Mai was about to break down. She
couldn't take being with him, and seeing the horrible things he had done to
himself. No, she thought, the things I have done to him. Mai raised her
hand "Mrs. Daniels." "Yes Mai?" "I don't feel well can I go to the nurse?"
"Of course" she said kindly. Joey just stared at her with those sad,
tortured eyes as she left the room.
Joey knew it hurt her to see him the way he was, but he just couldn't
snap out of it. What reason was there to be happy, He thought, I don't have
the one that holds my heart, when she left; she took my heart and soul with
her? He sighed and copied down all the information they needed to do their
project.
At the nurse's office Mai cried he heart out, when the nurse asked
what was wrong she lied and said her cat died. The nurse fell for it and
left Mai to herself. My cat died. What a lame excuse, this is about
something more important than that. This is about how My beloved Joey is
starving himself, and hoping his dad hurts him because he doesn't wish to
live. All because of me.
After school Joey walked outside and leaned against the brick wall.
Why is my life so horrible? Is there no god? Does he not care about me?
Suddenly Joey was angry. He turned around and slammed his fist against the
wall, trying to get rid of the emptiness that filled him. Trying to feel
anything but hopelessness. He kept on hitting it over and over, until his
fist was ripped and bleeding. So many feeling and emotions were churning
inside him, he didn't even feel it as blood ran down his arm and pooled on
the ground. He heard a cracking sound but his brain didn't even register
the pain as he broke his knuckles one by one, then finally his wrist, He
only stopped then, because he heard his name called. "Joey!" Yugi screamed,
"Stop!!!!!" Joey stopped then and looked at Yugi with mild curiosity,
"What?" Yugi looked like he was going to be sick "look at your hand!" Joey
looked and felt stunned at all the blood. When had this happened? Was he
going crazy? He couldn't feel his hand, and the world started to go blurry
all around. That's when Mai walked out the door and saw them. "Joey, Yugi,
what are you." that's when she saw Joey's hand. She screamed "Joey what
have you done!?!?!" She felt faint but she immediately came back to reality
when Joey started hyperventilating. "I.can't.breathe" He gasped, then
everything went black.
