Let Me Let Go
by Cloud Dragon
Authors Notes/Disclaimer: This ties into my story, All For Love. You probably need to read that to get this. The song is by Faith Hill. I do not have any affiliations with the wonderful Faith, nor do I own Charmed in any way. Dang. Anyway, if you wish to listen to the original recording of this song, it is on Faith Hill's CD, Faith, and is track number 3. Also, Pheobe's child was never taken by the Seer. Cuz I don't want him to be! ^_^ I tweaked it, Cole and Pheobe's child was conceived before Cole went all pseudo-demonic again. (We all know what went on in that room at night…*coughcough*…it's highly possible!) This is set a few months after the storyline in All For Love. Yes, the formatting will probably be off…but that's as good as I could get it! ^_^
On with the songfic!
~~~~~
I thought it was over, baby
We said our goodbyes
But I can't go a day without your face
Going through my mind…
Pheobe Halliwell woke up, feeling as good as she ever had since the battle with the Source. Seeing a picture of her and Cole on the wall, she sighed and took it down. 'No good trying to move on, if everywhere I go, I'm reminded of him,' she thought to herself. No, better just to forget, live life to its fullest, like Cole would have wanted of her. But it was so hard. Everywhere she looked, she could see his face, smiling at her.
In fact, not a single minute
Passes without you in it
Your voice, your touch
Memories of your love
Are with me all of the time…
She stepped into the shower, feeling hot water pound on her skin. 'Almost as good as coffee…' Pheobe thought, remembering with gusto the taste of the beverage she had given up about two months into her pregnancy.
"Pheobe!" Piper yelled up the stairs, "Are you ever going to come down where the rest of us normal people live?"
"Who's normal?" Pheobe asked the air, as she let the last of the warm drops of water wash away her dreams, and stayed standing under the streaming water until it turned icy cold.
Let me let go, baby
Let me let go
If this is for the best,
Why are you still in my heart,
Are you still in my soul, let me let go.
Pheobe came downstairs, dressed, and feeling quite ill. 'Morning sickness strikes again,' she cursed mentally, heading into the kitchen and straight for the sink, as to avoid the temptation of the coffeepot. 'Argh…' Just as she settled down at the table with a bagel and glass of milk, a knock sounded at the door. "Dammit."
"Such language!" Paige joked as she passed by, holding a steaming cup of coffee far away from Pheobe. "I'll get it. Don't you get up, now!"
I talked to you the other day
Looks like you made your escape
You put us behind, no matter how I try
I can't do the same.
Pheobe recalled fondly the last time she talked to her soulmate, and his words to her.
I'll always love you, Phoebe. I said it before, and I meant it.
"I'll remember," she murmured, her breakfast lying utterly forgotten as she got up to see who had been at the door.
Let me let go, baby
Let me let go
It just isn't right,
I've been two thousand miles
Down a dead-end road.
Paige and Piper were both at the door, their mouths dropped open.
"Catching flies, you two?" Pheobe joked lightheartedly. After all, she wasn't in direct view of the door yet. Piper turned to look at her, her eyes widened and full of something akin to shock.
"Just come in here!" she managed to gasp, pulling Pheobe out into the hall and in plain view of the person standing there.
Let me let go, darlin', won't you
I just gotta know, yeah
If this is for the best
Why are you still in my heart
Are you still in my soul, let me let go.
Pheobe's face soon melded to the expression her sister's wore. The man at their doorstep was ragged and dirty, but there was absolutely no mistake. It was…
"Cole…" Pheobe whispered, tears flowing freely from her eyes. "No, it can't be you…It can't be…" She backed up, and then ran through the front door, past the confused looking once-demon. He tried to go after her, but was held back by Piper and Paige.
The lights of this strange city are shinin'
But they don't hold no fascination for me
I try to find the bright side, baby
But everywhere I look,
Everywhere I turn, you're all I see.
Pheobe ran down the streets, blindly, not at all caring where her feet were taking her. She barely registered the fact that she ended up in front of what had once been the door to hers and Cole's home. A note and yellow crime scene tape plastered to the pristine white door declared the area as a police investigation scene. The investigation had ended some months ago. She sighed and opened the door, ducking under the plastic barrier to come to stand in the very spot where she had stood as Cole told her he loved her, and she had killed him. She sunk to the ground, body wracked by dry sobs. A hand placed on her shoulder let her know that there was someone else in the room with her.
Let me let go, baby,
Let me let go
It just isn't right,
I've been two thousand miles
Down a dead-end road.
She turned, burying her face into Cole's shirt. "God, I thought you were dead…"
"I am, Pheobe," he whispered, eyes glistening with his own unshed tears. "At least, that part of me. They sent me back…"
His sentence was cut off as Pheobe's hand was planted firmly on his cheek with a loud smack. "What, do you think you can just…die, come back, and expect everything to be normal?! Do you?" She sunk back to the ground, crying again. "I got over you, just like you said I should. Why did you come back?"
"Because I loved…love…you. We're soulmates, Pheobe. Nothing can keep us apart."
Oh, let me let go, darlin' won't you
I just gotta know
If this is for the best,
Why are you still in my heart,
Yeah, you're still in my soul, let me let go
Let me let go, let me let go.
"So…what are you now? Demon? Half-demon? Some reanimated body without a soul?" Pheobe continued with a small laugh. "Whitelighter?"
"Actually…human. For good this time. I've gone through hell to come back to you, Pheobe. That's how much I love you. I came through hell." He sunk down to the ground beside her, and gathered Pheobe into his arms. "I've changed. Hopefully it'll last this time."
She nodded, and sighed. "But…oh Cole, I just don't think I can do this. It's too soon…" He nodded, as if resigned to his fate. "I won't give up on us, Pheobe, I just want you to know that."
"I don't want you to. I just need…time."
"Come on," Cole said, wrapping his jacket around her shoulders. "I'll take you home."
---
"Where will you go?" Pheobe asked later, of the clean-shaven, well dressed man that was her recently deceased husband.
"New York, Atlanta…somewhere where I'm not too far away, if you need me, but far enough so you have your space. I will come back, though."
"I'm expecting it." Once more, Pheobe felt wrenching pain as the cab drove off, toward the San Francisco Airport, as if her soul was being torn in two. "I'll remember."
~~~~~
Fin! Yay! Read, review, regurgitate…LOL. (It's not that bad, is it?? I know it's hopeless cottony soft fluff, but I just can't help myself!! Least it's not a Mary Sue…*shudder*) Anyway, constructive criticism is accepted, even begged for, and flames will be used to heat my house, as it is cold. And yes, I used lines from All for Love. PURPOSELY! ^_^
Thanks for the read!
- Cloud Dragon