I still own nothing, so please don't sue - you will get very little. :)
Author's Notes - Thank you to all the reviewers: Midnight, DobbyWinky, SerenityBlack, Danielle, Sara, Lyansidd, Ice Queen, Herm-oh-ninny, Demeter, SnapesLoveChild, Chhaya, Jelly Bean, Yanagi-sen, Grammar Queen, Julie B, D/G Forever (great name BTW), Ehann, Tupper, hisoka, From A-Z, Pearl Light, Dazma, Tiger, Nala, G W, Sarah, Shawnna, animegirl-mika, Terpischore, Tigereyes, Occupationbwitch, Allie, Changing Child, Aunt Petunia and Kaitlin-Scott. You guys are great and I really appreciate your support so far :)
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Ginny Weasley sat inside the Gryffindor common room with her head in her hands. She wanted to pretend the events at breakfast hadn't affected her - that it hadn't hurt but she couldn't. How could she? She had went through the morning in a complete daze - hardly able to concentrate on anything else apart from the embarrassment. Why were they always so able to make her feel so inconsequential? They had to know there was more to her than that. They had to.
"There you are - you know sitting up here going hungry is really teaching them a lesson." Ginny looked up to see Rhianne standing with her hands on her hips. "But then again, that would only happen if they could get their heads out of their own arses for a wee while. How you doing?"
Ginny felt tears begin to fall from her eyes as she shook her head and gave a watery smile. "I'm...good."
Rhianne crossed the short distance and plopped down beside Ginny and put her arm around her shoulder. "Oh I can see that, so what is it? Dust in the eye? Did you lose your favourite socks? Did you suddenly realise that the man you've been lusting after for the past five years actually has the personality of a grub?"
Ginny began to laugh as she wiped her eyes. "It just hurt...I hate, hate feeling like a nothing."
Rhianne sighed before taking a finger and poking Ginny repeatedly until she yelped and jumped back. "There you go, you're definitely not a nothing."
"And now I have the bruises to prove it?"
"Exactly - you should consider getting them tattooed in place - a little reminder - 'I'm Ginny Weasley and I'm not insubstantial no matter what the Prat who Lived thinks'"
"Shut up," Ginny said with a smile as she sunk into the chair. "I was busy wallowing before you came up."
"Good job I came up then, ain't it?"
"I hate them you know? Even Ron - I hate them. I don't know why I bother..." Ginny said. And she meant it. She did hate them - she hated what they did. She hated the way they were so perfect. She hated the fact that the three of them were always so inaccessible to her. She hated the fact that they made her feel so small - so tiny. Was she really that much of a minor character in their eyes? She hated the fact that she always took it, that she always forgave them. She hated the fact that she couldn't get over him...
"You don't hate them - you hate what they do to you. If it's any consolation Ginny, I don't think you're a nothing - I mean, I know I'm not as smart as Hermione, or related like Ron or even as good looking as Harry but, between you and me, I think you got it good. I think you're great - to hell with the Three Amigos there - you're worth ten of them you don't need them. You got me and Colin and you know that we're cooler, smarter and funnier than they will ever be. Maybe when they get their heads out their own arses they will realise how great you are."
Ginny looked at her friend. "When did you get so smart?"
Rhianne grinned as she stood up. "Round about the time I got so damn irresistible to men - it's a gift."
Ginny smiled at her friends tongue in cheek statement, Rhianne wasn't bad looking but she definitely wasn't in the Patil mode of beauty. "I must have missed that bit when you got irresistible..."
"Oh you should have seen it, it was great - I mean, I was torn between Dean, Sam, Jake and Tony when they all begged me to go out with them but in the end I decided to settle for Colin."
Ginny giggled. "Good choice."
"I think so," she began before looking at Ginny. "See, that's better - you look a lot prettier when you smile. I've seen enough sad faces to last me the rest of the year recently, and I hate seeing you upset. Ignore them." She reached over to the table and grabbed a book off it before looking at Ginny again. "I have to go, Colin said...he said he wanted to show me what I'd missed in charms. You want to come down with me?"
"I need to go to Muggle Studies," Ginny shook her head as Rhianne reluctantly backed away. "Rhia? Thanks, you have no idea how glad I am that you're here."
"I'm glad I'm back as well. Have fun with Johanson - see you later, okay?"
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
She had managed to motivate herself to go down the stairs to Muggle Studies - there was no point putting it off any longer after all. She stood outside the door and rubbed her forehead before walking in. As bad as it was going to be, her day couldn't get any worse than it had been at breakfast - that had to be the low point. "Professor?"
She waited a second before Professor Johanson walked towards the small entrance to the room and greeted her with a pleasant smile as he ushered her into the large classroom. "Ah yes, I forgot I was scheduled to meet you. How's the project going?"
She flinched as he walked ahead of her, head bowed. "If I said it wasn't how angry would you be?"
He stopped walking as he got to the front of the class and looked at her. "Depends on the reason you haven't started it."
She was about to explain when she heard a person drumming their fingers on the desk in front of Johanson. She shook her head - she was not going to explain in front of a classmate and have them think she was stupid. "Oh, I'm sorry - I'll come back, I didn't know you were busy..."
"I'm not, Mr Malfoy here is fine on his own while we discuss this," Johanson began as he sat down and put his feet on the table. "So, tell me Ms Weasley, why exactly are you having problems?"
Ginny's eyes widened involuntarily as she turned around and looked at the blond headed boy look up at her. "Malfoy?" Great, just your luck.
"Weasley," he said with a shake of his head. She wanted to scream - why were the fates conspiring to torture her today?
"Oh look, we all know each others names, how lovely. Now why don't we all do what we're here for - Malfoy, read and shut up. Weasley, get over here and explain what's wrong."
Ginny set her shoulders and walked to the front of the class. Okay, fine she had to concede defeat in front of the hell spawn but, it wasn't like he could cause any trouble, he had made a promise. She would just say what she had to say and be gone. That was all. She looked at him and saw him lift a piece of paper like he was reading but his eyes never moved from her - he seemed to be looking right through her, reading her. She felt her face begin to heat up as she kept her eyes on him - she could look at him like that as well and if he thought she would back down from him he had another thing coming. She was a Weasley after all.
"Weasley? Any time - I do have classes this afternoon."
Ginny jumped and she had the distinct impression that Draco was trying not to laugh as she turned to the professor. "Sorry, um yes...I...It's just the exchange rates. I can't, for the life of me work out how they work - they have about ten different types of coin and as many more types of notes and then you can pay using pieces of plastic or paper? I don't see how I can give a presentation on this - I was...I was hoping I could change to another group?"
She had spoken quickly and had hoped that the answer would come as quickly so she could get out of there as soon as possible but as the teacher looked at her she could see that wasn't going to happen and that she was probably going to have to have a discussion about this.
"Did you not go into the Muggle world during the holidays like I suggested?"
She dropped her head, how to explain this so she didn't sound so pathetic? "It's not safe to go into that alone and my brothers couldn't come."
"Ginny," Johanson began wearily, "you are studying Muggles - at one point you need to interact with them. It's November - how on earth can I transfer you into another established group and expect you to get up to their level of research?"
She shook her head. "I...I would work really hard to catch up, I don't want to fail..."
She could almost hear him say that no one wanted to fail but that life sucked and she'd just have to get over it. She hated professors that didn't like to candy coat what they were thinking. But as he looked at her he gave her a small sigh. "How can I make an exception for you and not for the others? No, I can't let you transfer - I'm sorry but no."
I'm sorry but no - that was what it came down to. Four words. "But I won't pass otherwise..."
Johanson looked genuinely sorry as he looked at her. "That's not my problem..."
It was then it happened. He laughed. He tried to disguise it as a cough but she knew, she knew what it was. Malfoy was laughing at her. She turned slowly and looked at him as Johanson enquired as to what was wrong.
"I was just wondering why someone would choose a project about money when they would know nothing about it by nature?" His expression shifted from one of malice to one of feigned innocence. "Unless I'm mistaken."
She felt her eyes narrow as she clenched her hands at her side as Malfoy and Johanson continued their exchange - she had never wanted to throttle anyone as badly as she wanted to throttle that smug snake! And he knew how to pick his days - she was not in the mood for him today.
"So what do you suggest I do? Change my policy because you're having problems? I made it clear at the beginning..."
She sighed as she turned around to face Johanson who was now looking back at her. "I know, I know but..."
"But what? If you don't complete the project it makes it very difficult for you to pass the course. It's 40% of the final grade, Ginny. You knew this - why are you only coming to me now about it?"
She shook her head and looked down, not knowing what to say. She hadn't put the work in early enough and hadn't realised she couldn't do it before? Somehow she doubted he would be overly sympathetic - especially since he still remembered the 'good old days' when her brothers were the stars of the class.
"Okay, let me think about what we can do. How about..." He began with a reassuring smile before a deep voice called to him from the doorway causing him to omit a deep sigh before apologising and walking out the door. Great, she was left alone with Malfoy - could this day get any worse? You've definitely angered someone in a past life, Ginny...
"Aww, the poor Weasel failing? Never mind, your family must be used to it with the complete lack of intelligence in the past few off spring. Is that what happens when you have a large family - do they get progressively more idiotic or is that just a Weasley trait?"
She lifted her head to see his smug expression look back at her. "Shut up, Malfoy. I'm not failing anything and even if I was it would be nothing to do with you."
"Yet here I am, witness to it all. You know, you could beg and maybe that would persuade him to make an exception to you? Oh wait, beg? That would be demeaning for you, right? Poor people have too much pride for that, correct?" he said with a sneer - why was he still here? Why did he have to bring everything around to money? Why couldn't he say one word without there being a malicious undercurrent to it?
"Shut up! God, did you mean a word of that apology this morning?"
"I meant every word - I just find it hard to be sincere when they practically blackmail me to say it. Of course I need an outlet as I can't torment Longbottom or your boyfriend anymore. How is Potter, by the way? You two still getting lost in conversation with each other?" He gave a derisive laugh as he asked the question. She immediately felt her face burn - if it wasn't about money, it was about Harry! Why wouldn't he leave her alone? Look at his face, Ginny - he enjoys it too much and you give him the reaction he wants every time.
"Why can't you just be quiet for once? Do you want expelled?" She wanted to believe that she had managed to disguise the fact that he was hurting her so she turned around, hoping he would take the hint and leave her alone. Hoping he wouldn't see how close she was to tears - it had just been the worst day and she didn't need this.
"Evidently not or else I wouldn't be here, would I? I wouldn't have embarrassed myself and my house in front of the school this morning, would I? I wouldn't be sitting here, listening to you babbling about how you can't understand how economics work because you were afraid to go into the big bad Muggle world on your own if I wanted expelled, would I? So no, Ginny Weasley - I don't want expelled, but I don't want to become an annoying person that I don't recognise anymore, so, when the opportunity arises where I can vent on something as inconsequential as you, I just can't resist it."
It was as he finished speaking that she lost it - inconsequential! How dare he call her that! She span around and after the initial shock of the statement she took a step towards him and swung her hand across his face. The sound of the slap was quite satisfying but she couldn't really enjoy it - what he'd said had hurt too much. She held her hand which burned with the force she had hit him with and looked up at him, a red mark across his pale cheek becoming apparent. "How dare you! I am not 'inconsequential' - I'm a person and I swear you will leave me and my family alone!"
Her statement probably sounded stronger than she felt - which was probably a good job. He didn't look overly impressed, in fact he looked really angry and his expression seemed to steel her own resolve. It was very rarely that she had seen Malfoy lose his temper and, despite the fact that he looked murderous she had her doubts on whether he would react physically to her. "Are you planning on making me leave you alone, Weasley?" he whispered, his voice menacing. "Do you think I couldn't handle you?"
She had no doubt that he could but the threat seemed to her to be an empty one - she had no doubt that he could make her suffer but it would be through his insults and she couldn't see how he could say anything more hurtful than he had done already. "Just leave me alone - that means no jibes, no insults! What is wrong with you? Why do you have to be so twisted?"
She wasn't sure why she wanted to know - why did she care why he was so cruel - there couldn't be any excuse. But, she couldn't deny that she wanted to know - she couldn't understand how he could possibly enjoy his life being that nasty all the time. She looked at him and noticed that he seemed slightly taken aback but he still managed to answer her quickly. "Me twisted? I believe you are the one resorting to violence - and you Gryffindors are usually so sickeningly self righteous as well. Yet here we have you resorting to violence and name calling?" he shook his head and feigned a yawn to indicate how bored he was with the conversation. "If I didn't see how much you just want to cry it would probably be quite enlightening on the double standards of your house. But please, don't let me stop you - there's a corner over there that you can go cry in."
She almost felt herself smile - this, was who she was scared of? She shook her head and sat on the desk, never looking away from him. He was a bully and he didn't even know why he did it - and there was nothing that scared her about that. She raised her head and set her shoulders as she looked at him. It was amusing the way that he seemed almost unnerved by the way she looked at him - he actually seemed shocked. The look soon past and he turned and sat on his own desk and stared at her - almost daring her to look away first. As they sat in silence just looking at each other she zoned out of everything else. She could not let him beat her - if he did then it would begin all over again.
"Well, isn't this interesting? I am so glad that you two have nothing better to do than sit and make ga-ga eyes at each other..."
She jumped at the sound of the voice and looked up to see Johanson looking at them with a weird smile as Draco...no, Malfoy enquired about what he was referring to.
"Not a term I would expect either of you to be aware of as you are both rather clueless about Muggles - ga ga, an expression of endearment. If you are crazy for something you could be said to be 'ga ga' about it." Johanson said without hiding his amusement.
"I'm not crazy about him!" she almost screamed without thinking. Johanson couldn't think that she would be interested in someone as vile as Malfoy? That was ridiculous!
As she spoke she noticed Draco turn and look at her with malice as he responded coolly. "The feeling, I assure you, is entirely mutual."
"Well, be that as it may - you two will really have to learn to get along. I just came from a very interesting discussion with Professor Dumbledore and he mentioned to me one of the terms of your deal, Malfoy," he addressed Draco as he walked over towards his desk. "Care to guess what term he was filling me in on?"
Ginny couldn't deny she was interested in the actual terms - the more she heard about it the more she was convinced that he was desperate to stay in Hogwarts and the more she realised that he probably hadn't even let Lucius know about his punishment. This was a curiosity for her because there must've been a reason he cared so much but she couldn't think why. She waited on Malfoy's answer but he refused to answer so Johanson continued, looking rather pleased with himself if she was honest. "No? What if I was to say 'work with a Gryffindor'? Would that spark your memory? Well, let me introduce you - Mr Malfoy, meet your tutor," he indicated from Draco to Ginny before turning his attention to Ginny and reversing the motion as he continued. "Ms Weasley, meet your project. Passing grade for the pair of you if you both pass - failing grades if either of you fail."
Ginny had blinked and had been open mouthed at the first statement but as the realisation sank in she felt her eyes widen in panic. She couldn't work with him! "No! This isn't fair, why am I being punished for him?! Just 'cause he messed up!"
"You are the one who wanted to change your project and this is the easiest way - you will have three hours together a week - I hardly think that will kill you. This is the easiest way for you to pass - I thought you would be happy?"
She looked at him and bit her lip. Why would she be happy? Had he any idea what kind of person Draco Malfoy was? She couldn't work with him...she just couldn't. "Not him..."
Johanson gave a small sigh. "If you think you can get a better grade on your other project feel free to continue with that, if not don't look a gift horse in the mouth, even if that gift horse is something you find repulsive. What of you, Malfoy? Is this unacceptable to you?"
She had hoped that he would say yes, that he didn't want to work with her but as he looked at her and gave her his most malicious smile she knew - she knew he would say no just to spite her. To pay her back. She hated him, she realised at that moment - truly hated him. He was just determined to pay her back and the easiest way to do that would be to make her fail and he would enjoy it. "No, I think Weasley would make a fine tutor - if she can get rid of that vile temper that she clearly picked up competing in a zoo for her parents affection."
"Enough Malfoy, you made an agreement," Johanson chastised Malfoy before turning back to Ginny. "So, what's it to be?"
She looked at Draco - the way she saw it she had two options, she could refuse and persevere with her own project or she could refuse Malfoy the satisfaction of causing her to fail. She couldn't let him dictate her actions and that's what he was trying to do and she wouldn't allow it. She was better than that. She was stronger than that. "Fine, just tell him he better shut up or it won't just be my vile temper he has to deal with."
She picked up her bag as Johanson nodded his head and gave himself a smug smile. "Good, good - I'll finalise the details and let you both know later. Ginny, thank you - and believe me, you'll thank me when you pass with flying colours. Malfoy, you'll just thank me when you see the year out as a Hogwarts student. You can both go now..."
She didn't wait for another second and after giving Malfoy a final look she walked quickly out of the room and into the corridor, the full weight of what had happened weighing her down. What had she agreed to? What would Ron say? What would Ron do? She winced as she walked away. It probably wasn't worth thinking about.
She had walked halfway up to the common room to pick up a book for her afternoon classes when she heard footsteps behind her. "Ginny, wait up!"
She turned around and saw Harry run up to her. Normally she would be excited at the fact that he was so close to her, that he had run up to her but the day had been too draining and she found herself just waiting expectantly on him to speak. She couldn't even seem to find the energy to feel happy or embarrassed. "Hey, Harry."
He arrived and looked at her in confusion. "You okay? You don't look right, there isn't anything wrong is there?"
Oh, now he cares. She found herself thinking somewhat bitterly. "I'm fine, just been a long day..."
He gave her a smile and she felt a small part deep inside her give a small leap as his green eyes looked at her but still, the pain of earlier had somehow shut off a part of her that would have usually taken joy from that. "I, I just wanted to apologise for this morning, we were completely out of order and I know I snapped at you and I really didn't mean to. I was just..."
"You were worried about Neville," she finished for him and gave a small smile. "I know. So was I."
He nodded his head as he shoved his hands in his robe pockets awkwardly as he looked over his shoulder to see Ron and Hermione waiting on him. She almost laughed - the big apology was going to be over quick.
"I'm really sorry - it won't happen again, I promise," he began before he looked back at his friends.
She shook her head and sighed. "Don't worry about it, I should...go and get my book, so I'm not late for class and you should go do whatever secret thing you and the others are going to do."
He turned back to her and looked at her in concern as she began walking away. "Ginny, are you sure you're okay? Give me a minute and I'll come up to the common room with you."
She stopped and almost said okay. She almost waited on him and turned back to look at him before shaking her head - she couldn't deal with another disappointment today and no matter how much she dreamed about it waiting on Harry would always end up being a disappointment to her. A great disappointment, admittedly but she needed a day away from that - away from the inevitable pain of loving Harry because she didn't know what else to do apart from that. Apart from wanting him, what else was there? And the thing was that he did, he did know other things to do and that was the problem. She couldn't keep waiting on him to aknowledge her, to want her. If he had really wanted to come with her he wouldn't have asked and although she appreciated the sentiment she didn't want his sympathy. "No, I need to be quick - I'll...I'll see you all at dinner. Bye."
She walked off leaving the three of them standing there. She wanted to believe that Harry would come running after her, that her new cool exterior would have intrigued him and he would have realised in that second what he'd missed and would come and pledge his love for her. She wanted to believe that Ron would be warning him about hurting his little sister but give his blessing. She wanted to believe so much but as she stopped and waited on the sound of the footsteps that she thought would be coming after her she realised that they weren't coming, that they would never come. She would always be the one left on her own - she would always be the one they would think about after the fact. She would always be on the periphery. But, she also knew another thing. She was a person and she was more than Ron Weasley's sister and it was time she started acting like it. She reached up to her arm and touched the spot that Rhia had poked so mercilessly earlier. A little reminder - 'I'm Ginny Weasley and I'm not insubstantial no matter what the Prat who Lived thinks'
She felt herself laugh slightly. "I'm Ginny Weasley, and I'm not insubstantial no matter what...and I have the bruising to prove it."
She'd be okay, what didn't kill you only made you stronger and she figured, on the strength of today, she would be incredibly strong. And she'd need it to cope with her new project - just wait until everyone heard about that.
TBC