Dear Monkeys Of The Hardpan South (MOTHS),
My name is Eliza and I have an over joyous love for monkeys especially the MOTHS. I love you guys! I can talk to monkeys, moose, and barbarians you name it! How you ask? Long story. Shaman Harupa-bob or whatever his name was "rewarded" me for good behavior. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you guys how much I loved you.
Love your biggest "human" fan,
Eliza (Last name prohibited I can't spell it anyway.)
P.S. I just got through reading this book about how monkeys couldn't read English.