Chapter Seven
The Letters
Harry sat down at a carol in the library. It was the last night before the Christmas holiday, and he decided it might be a good idea to start in on his homework now so he could have more time with Draco later. As he pulled out some parchment and a quill, his mind wandered to Draco, as it always did nowadays. He really is a hot little number, isn't he. Harry pulled up a mental picture of him from their morning in the prefects' bathroom. Harry grinned. By Merlin, that boy is beautiful.
Harry sighed and looked at his Transfiguration notes. He tried to prise his mind away from his boyfriend and force it to think about why it is so important to be careful when turning a human into an animal. He looked down at his parchment. It was no longer blank. it was now covered with doodles of Draco's face, his name, his body. Harry sighed again. This is great, Potter. Just hand this in to McGonagall. She'll love it. Harry picked up the parchment and shoved it into his bag. He would have thrown it out, but his hand actually captured the loving look on Draco's face that Harry had come to know so well. He couldn't throw a picture of his boyfriend away.
Harry sat back in his chair, giving in to the thoughts of Draco that were flooding his mind. You know, said his mind. It's been two months since that detention. You and Dray have been together for two whole months. In fact... Harry looked down at his watch. December 11th. Exactly two months tomorrow! Bloody hell! I have to see Draco tomorrow. Harry pulled out a new piece of parchment, and his green ink. He was happy now that Hermione had convinced him to buy this ink. When they were at the store over the summer break, she had insisted he get it because it was the exact color of his eyes. Harry picked up his quill again, dabbed it into the green ink, and began to write a letter to Draco.
Twenty minutes later, Harry dropped his quill on the desk and looked over the letter once more. Nodding to himself and smiling, he folded the letter and put it carefully into an envelope he had gotten out of his bag. On the front of the envelope, he wrote Draco's name, taking great care not to smudge the ink or blot the envelope. Then he turned it over and wrote another quick sentence on the back flap.
Then after he placed the envelope safely on the desk, Harry stuffed the rest of his things into his bag. Harry stood and threw his bag over his shoulder. Then he gently picked up the letter and hurried out of the library and off to the Owlery.
~*~*~*~
Draco looked up the next morning as the owls flew in with the morning mail. He went back to his cereal as they came in. He wasn't expecting anything.
He'd already gotten the letter back from his father telling him it was fine that Draco stayed at Hogwarts for the holiday. His father had said that he and Draco's mother would be visiting friends during that time anyway, so it was good that Draco wanted to stay. They're probably going to see Voldemort. Draco thought. Draco took a bite of his cereal and swallowed as he looked around the Hall. Harry was talking happily with Hermione and Weasley. Then Draco yelled as something pinched his hand.
He was about to start yelling at Crabbe and Goyle, who were staying at Hogwarts as well. But it wasn't them. An owl, a very frustrated owl by the looks of it, was sitting next to the hand it had just nipped. The owl had dropped a letter next to Draco's plate and was waiting for some kind of acknowledgement.
Draco ran a finger down its stomach and said, "Thank you."
The owl stole a piece of bacon from a nearby third-year's plate and took off quickly.
Draco looked down at the envelope. The tidy script on the front said "Draco Malfoy" in green ink. A smile threatened to creep onto Draco's lips. Draco suppressed it. He turned over the envelope. There was more green writing on the back.
"Open this alone in your room after breakfast."
Draco's eyes flew to Harry. Harry was watching him now. Draco raised an eyebrow, asking with his eyes whether it was Harry that had sent the letter. Harry just smiled. Draco looked down at the envelope again.
"Open this alone in your room after breakfast."
Draco was looked at his watch. When will this bloody meal be over?!? his mind screamed. He looked down at his half-eaten cereal. He pushed the bowl away. He was too excited to eat.
~*~*~*~
Harry smiled. Draco's probably going crazy right now. Harry's smile got wider. He watched as Draco pushed his bowl away from him and fidgeted with the envelope that was obviously plaguing his thoughts for the rest of the meal. Harry just kept on eating. Wait till he reads it. Damn, I wish I could be there when he reads it.
Draco looked at Harry again. Harry grinned back at his boyfriend, enjoying watching Draco be so perplexed. Harry put his spoon down next to his own cereal and rested his chin in his palm. Harry looked quickly around the room to make sure everyone was absorbed in their conversations about what they would be doing over the holiday. Then Harry looked back at Draco, who eyes had not left Harry's face. Harry slid the hand his chin was resting on in front of his mouth and quickly blew a kiss at Draco.
Draco nearly fell over. He looked all around the room, clearly scared that someone had seen that blatant display of affection. Harry watched as Draco relaxed. He evidently saw that everyone was too engrossed in their conversations that no one saw the gesture. Draco stared back at Harry. He shook his head quickly, his eyes telling Harry that Harry should never do that again. Harry just smiled sweetly.
Well that was far too amusing, thought Harry, picking up his spoon again. It's almost tempting to do that more often. A grin spread across Harry's face. He turned to Ron.
"So what shall we do this afternoon with the common room to ourselves?" he asked.
~*~*~*~
Draco rushed into his room after practically sprinting from the Great Hall. He closed the door behind him, and pulled out his wand. Draco put every locking spell he'd ever learned on the door. Once he was sure he was safely by himself, Draco walked over to his bed. He pulled out the letter that could only be from Harry. As he looked at his name scrawled across the front, he noticed that the ink was the same green he saw whenever he looked at Harry. Draco smiled. He turned the envelope over and saw the same words on the back.
"Open this alone in your room after breakfast."
Draco sighed. He opened the envelope and smiled. Inside was one sheet of parchment. He recognized Harry's writing instantly. The letter was written in the same green ink. He noticed that the ink was sparkling, making it look even more like Harry's eyes. Draco climbed onto his bed and laid back as he began to read.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dearest Draco-
I know that I shouldn't be writing this letter, but I couldn't help myself. I was trying to write a paper, but all I could do was think of you. It amazes me that we have become what we are.
The last few weeks have been the happiest I have ever experienced in my life. Every time I see you, I feel a surge of excitement. Not just because of what we've shared physically. But also that amazing emotional connection that we obviously share.
Looking into your eyes, I see a love that I have never known in my life. Your love for me in the last few weeks has more than made up for all the hatred and pain I have felt in my life. You have made me feel more worthy of being alive. You have taught my heart to sing.
When I am with you, I know that no matter what happens, no matter who tries to hurt me, I am strong enough to fight. The only reason I feel that strength is because I know that you love me.
Your love has made me a better person. I feel like a completely different man now that we are together. I feel like I can live and truly be alive. Because of you.
Thank you. For the love you have shown me. Thank you. For the happiness you bring me. Thank you. For the reason to go on. Thank you. For being who you are. Thank you.
I love you.
Love always,
Harry
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Draco blinked as the tears welled up in his eyes. He put the letter aside so his tears wouldn't smudge up the beautiful words his boyfriend had written. Draco was amazed. He never expected that this would be how the letter affected him. He picked up the letter again. He read and reread the letter. All these words. They were written for me. About me. To me. Wow. In Draco's mind, there were no other words but "wow" that described how he was feeling at that moment. Draco had never believed that he could be loved like this. He looked at the letter again in awe. He laid it next to him on the bed. Draco's hand slid into his pocket and found his wand. As he sat on his bed, he pointed at the desk. He didn't trust himself to walk over to his desk to get what he needed. He decided to just Summon them instead.
"Accio parchment. Accio book. Accio quill. Accio ink." said Draco quietly. The four items flew to him. His History of Magic book flopped onto his lap. The blank sheet of parchment on top of the book. The bottle of bright blue ink landed next to the parchment, and the eagle-feather quill landed on top of the parchment, ready for Draco to pick up and write with. Draco took a deep breath. He had to compose himself before he could write anything to Harry. Harry's words kept repeating in his head.
After ten minutes filled with Draco mumbling "calm down" to himself, the Slytherin finally picked up the quill. For a few seconds, his hand was poised over the parchment, Draco searching for the right words. Finally they came to him. His hand danced back and forth over the parchment in front of him, his feelings pouring out his fingers and onto the page.
After a quarter of an hour, he put his quill down. The blue ink shined up at him, still drying. His ink, too, was the exact shade of his eyes. His mother had gotten him the ink. "Use it well," she had said when she gave it to him. He hadn't used it at all, thinking that nothing was worthy of it. He knew now that this ink would be saved only for Harry from then on.
Draco's eyes scanned the page. I guess that's alright, he thought. He didn't think it was nearly as beautiful as what Harry had written. But it was all that he could manage to put into words. Draco sighed. Then he smiled. It was nice to be able to free his feelings like this, if only in letter form. Maybe I should think of getting a journal.
Draco picked up the parchment and blew on it to speed the drying of the ink. He put the letter next to the one from Harry. He Summoned an envelope from his desk. He wrote Harry's name on the front in the blue ink. Then he scribbled a short message on the back of the envelope. Draco picked up the letter in one hand and his wand in the other. He whispered a charm at the letter and folded it carefully. He slid the parchment into the envelope and sealed it.
Draco hopped off his bed. He turned back to face his bed and picked up Harry's letter and the envelope it arrived in. With a last look at the letter, Draco slid that letter into its envelope and slipped it under his pillow.
Then Draco strode across the room and undid the locking charms he had sealing the dormitory door. He pulled open the door, walked out, and down to the common room.
As he walked to the door out of the common room, he threw an "I'll be back later" over his shoulder at Crabbe and Goyle and hurried off to the Owlery.
~*~*~*~
After breakfast, the Gryffindor Trio had gone up to their common room to spend some time by themselves. All the rest of the Gryffindors, save Ginny Weasley and Colin Creevey, had gone home for the holiday. Harry was now sitting in the Gryffindor Tower watching Hermione lose quite spectacularly to Ron at wizard's chess. As Hermione's King surrendered, Harry heard a tapping. He looked to the window and saw Hedwig fighting against the cold wind, wrapping her claw at on the window pane. Harry rushed over, confused. He hadn't sent any letters to anyone with Hedwig lately. The last one he had sent out was the one to Draco, asking if they could meet to talk about Hermione. He pulled open the window and Hedwig swooped in, landing on a chair by the fire. Harry rushed to Hedwig and grabbed the letter out of her beak. She hooted at him as she sat on the chair, warming herself.
"Who is that from, Harry?" asked Ron, looking puzzled.
"I don't know," said Harry, equally puzzled. He looked at his name written on the front. It was in blue ink, just about the color of-
"Oh." said Harry, realizing who it had to be from. He turned the envelope over in his hand and looked at the back.
"Only open this when you are alone."
Hermione and Ron sat across from each other, both staring at Harry. As Harry looked up again, a lopsided smile formed briefly on his lips. He stopped his mouth from out-and-out grinning, but just barely. Hermione saw the smile, however, and knew immediately who it was from. Harry looked at the other two for a second longer. Then he said, "I'll be in our room, Ron. I need to be alone for a while, though. You and Hermione... You two go spend some quality time together," said Harry. "Her room should be free." Harry winked. Then he turned on his heel and hurried to the steps. He took the steps three at a time and reached his room in record time. As soon as Harry closed the door, he put up every locking charm he knew, and a couple repelling charms as well. He turned toward his bed and looked at the back of the envelope again.
"Only open this when you are alone."
He was alone now. He smiled, walked over to his bed, and flopped on his back. He propped himself up on the pillows and lifted the flap of the envelope. He pulled out the parchment inside. As he unfolded it, he heard a familiar voice speaking to him. He gasped. Harry dropped the letter and sat up, looking around the room. As soon as the letter left his fingers, the voice stopped. Harry turned back to the letter, amazed. He picked it up again and the voice filled the room. He read along as Draco's voice spoke the words written on the page.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My Dearest Harry,
I just read your letter. It was beautiful. I will try to convey everything that I feel now, after your letter, but I do not think I can do justice to the feelings in my heart. But first. Thank you. A million times thank you. I have never read anything more beautiful in my life.
In fact, I've never felt anything more beautiful. As a child, I was never really loved, only tolerated. When I came to Hogwarts, I found some friendship. But I have never known what it was like to be loved. Until two months ago.
That night, in the trophy room, I felt for the first time in my life that someone cared. You cared. Not because you thought you needed to, not because you were told to, but because you wanted to.
You brought so much to my life. You brought unconditional friendship. You brought true happiness. You brought LOVE.
That love is what sustains me now. Before you, I wanted so much for life to hurry up and be over already. I hated who I had to be. But now. Now I can love, and actually be loved in return.
Before you I had nothing. With you now, I have everything.
The Malfoy name may bring riches beyond belief, but I would gladly give that up to feel the way I do about you. You are my heart. My life. My soul. My everything.
Every day when I see you, my heart aches because I am not near you. Every night I lay awake, thinking about you. Wanting you. Missing you. Loving you.
When I am awake, all my thoughts are of you. When I am asleep, all my dreams are of you. I see you, smiling at me. And I see your lips forming the same words over and over again. And now, I say them to you.
I love you.
Please meet me where you and I became 'we,' the Trophy Room at nine tonight. I need to see you.
Forever yours,
Draco
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Draco's voice stopped as soon as it landed on its owner's name. It was now Harry's turn for the tears. He let them flow freely for a long time, dropping the letter at his side. He picked the letter up again. As he looked over the letter, the voice began again, repeating the words. Finally, when the voice whispered, "Forever yours, Draco," Harry wiped away his tears as he folded the letter and put it back into the envelope. Harry was amazed at the beautiful writings of his boyfriend. He was overcome with love for Draco. Harry lay back onto his pillows again, and thought about Draco. To think. We were apart all these years, and for no good reason. Only silly House Pride. I can't believe I was so blinded. But now my eyes are opened and I see. I see Draco. My Draco. Harry smiled, looking at his watch. 11:36. Only nine hours and twenty four minutes until I can be with my Draco.
~*~TBC~*~