Torn Apart
By: Me-Rite-Much
A/n: Lol, the funny thing is, I wrote most of this fic in two days, but for some reason I didn't finish it for about a month, but now I guess I might as well finish. Even though I have plenty of ideas for fics, I think I might take a small hiatus on writing my fics. I just O, and on one more side note, I forgot what the names of Matts parents were so im just gonna make it up. Now usually when I write angst fics, I try to find real, real tough subjects to deal with, but with this fic, I really dropped a few notches on how deep the subject is. O well, hope you enjoi anyway.
Disclaimer: I don't own digimon, Toei does.
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"Damnit Mark, why do you have to keep bringing the kids into this, you leave them alone!" Mrs. Ishida screamed at her husband as they both argued fiercely in their apartment, Matt was in his room, while T.K. was sitting at the kitchen table doing his homework while he ignored the fighting. T.K. was still too small to truly be affected by the fighting, he just kept on with his homework while his parents while yelling at eachother just a few feet away from him. Matt's dad had just asked T.K. if he saw how his wife had just pushed him weakly out of anger. It was another fight that had begun out of something stupid, something that could be easily solvable If the two had just sat down and talked over it reasonably. T.K. was still very little, he didn't really pay much attention to the fighting. He was affected a bit, but not as much. Another reason T.K. didn't notice much was because he was listening to some kiddy cd he owned.
Even though T.K. didn't understand much, his older brother Matt understood a lot, especially about what was going on. Matt just stayed locked up in his room while his parents went about fighting. Matt's room was very messy, his T.V. on and at very high volume, some clothes on the floor, a few old school papers on the small table right next to his T.V. It wasn't really that messy, but it sure could have been tidied at least a bit. Then there was Matt, who simply sat on his bed, not even paying much attention to whatever T.V. show was on, he just desperately wanted to distract himself from the fighting going on just on the other side of the door. Even with the door in the way, Matt could still hear a lot of the screaming. "Damnit, stupid cheap ass door." Matt complained to himself as he tried to raise the volume on the television. He threw the remote on the floor in anger when he realized the T.V. reached it's volume maximum. "God damnit, I can still hear them." Matt said to himself.
He got so frustrated with the noise that he put a pillow over both his ears and tried to dig into his bed covers so the noise would stop. 'Finally, nice, peaceful quiet.' He thought as he finally smiled for the first time that day. The fighting never truly stopped at the Ishida residence. Matt's parents would fight about once every few months and it would go too far a lot. Unlike some other parents fighting, the ones Matt's parents had usually ended up with his dad packing up some things and living with his aunt for a few weeks. Many people might be relieved when their parents make up, but to Matt, it was just another setup for a big fall that would happen too soon. So many times had he been promised that the fighting would stop, and so many times had he been let down.
Matt simply couldn't take the constant fighting, then having to choose between his parents when his dad brought him into the fights. There were many incidents where his Mother would hit his Dad, and then he would approach his son and make sure he saw. "You see, you see how she hits me even though I'm doing nothing to her?!" His dad would say when his wife would give him weak hits of anger.
"Stop bringing your children into this!" Matt's mother would often retaliate when she saw her husband approach him during their fights. "Why do you always have to run to Matt and bring him into this, don't you know how terrible it makes him feel?!" Matt did agree with some things his mom said, he really did hate when his dad brought him into the fights, but he loved his dad, and if anything needed to be done, Matt had no other choice. That must have been why Matt often agreed to watch and see their fights so he could be a witness, all he had to do was count how many times any fists or open hands would be thrown by his mom. Matt's dad wasn't a violent man, so he had never raised his hand against his wife, but he did get mad and often yelled a lot.
His voice sometimes got so big that his wife would have to hush him forcefully and remind him that they had neighbors. Matt would often get mad and just close himself up in his room, either that or go visit Tai. Matt knew the only two reasons he did not run away or kill himself were Tai, and his little brother T.K.. Even though he was still very young, Matt was still really close to his boyfriend Tai. Ever since the digiworld, when Tai had finally admitted his feelings to him, Matt had loved to spend his time with the other boy. The only real problem was that they hadn't told anyone, even when they got back.
In the digiworld, Tai had relied on Matt's love a lot to get him through some tough times. Leading some kids into the unknown is very hard to deal with, especially in Tai's case because of how he felt for Matt. Tai felt so good once he and Matt were together, now he had someone he could truly open up to, because there were some things that Tai knew if he had told Kari or Sora, they would fuss and worry a lot. But Matt wasn't like that with Tai. Tai could tell Matt anything and he would listen, he wouldn't jump to conclusions or start to go crazy with worry, he would just listen, and then if it was something important, ask what he could do to help.
Even when Matt returned to the digiworld and he had to return to the fighting between his parents, he would still be the more dominant one in his relationship with Tai. Matt hated feeling weak, and he also hated it when others knew he was in a vulnerable state. He knew that no matter what, Tai would be there for him, but he always wanted to be the comforter, not the other way around; yet sometimes he just felt so weak inside, and he truly needed to be held and comforted the way he did to Tai many times before.
The fighting was getting louder, much to Matt's dismay. After a few minutes of watching T.V., he began getting a bit thirsty. The noise from the fighting seemed to have stopped, so Matt decided it was safe for him to go out of his room and get some soda from the fridge in the kitchen. Opening his door, Matt looked outside to see what happened in the living room. He looked around and saw what had happened. His mom was sitting on the kitchen table by T.K., writing down on some paper. His dad was in the bedroom, packing his things. It seemed like his dad was going to go back to his aunts again. Sighing out of frustration, Matt walked to the kitchen and took out some soda. He looked in the kitchen shelves right above him for a cup and quietly filled it with Soda while his parents were there.
Matt was about to go back to his room to enjoy his Coca-Cola when his father finally got out of the bedroom with the small suitcase and started confronting his wife again. "Listen, I'm going now ok, but you have some really messed up problems. I did not do anything to provoke you ok, Matt knows, he's seen how you hit me and I never lift a finger against you. . ."
"Stop brining our children into this!" His wife interrupted. "They have nothing to do with this, all of this is OUR problem, not theirs." She kept going on, and Matt's dad kept going on and on. Something started coming over Matt, he had no idea what, but after a few seconds of his parents fighting, he just clapped his hands over his ears and leaned on the kitchen counter. Every few weeks the yelling would start all over again. He was getting sick of the constant fighting, the constant worry of his parents making him choose between them.
He couldn't take it anymore. Matt opened his eyes and got in between the two of them. "Why can't you just stop this!? Why does the fighting kee happening!? Don't you know what this does!? We aren't even a real family! Both of you never get along, nothing changes! Every time you say you will stop, but for years nothing has happened! Can't you just divorce and get it over with?! Don't you care about me and T.K.!? Can't you let us be in peace for at least one month!?"
A few tears escaped his eyes as Matt realized what he had just done. Not knowing what else to do, Matt dashed out of the apartment. He heard his parents yelling after him, but Matt didn't want to go back. He couldn't take the fighting and the constant arguing anymore. He ran down the hallway, then rushed to the stairway of the apartment complex and quickly dashed down the few floors it took to reach the lobby.
He didn't know where to go or what to do next, but he simply couldn't stay there anymore. Right now the only thing on Matt's mind was talking to Tai. He couldn't hold it in anymore, he needed to tell somebody how tired he felt on the inside. Matt hated to show weakness, but now he had no other choice, he knew Tai wouldn't fuss or get worried either, which made it first priority for Matt.
"Hey Kari, have you seen my C-D player anywhere?" Tai called out from his room while Kari was watching T.V. in the living room.
"No, but I think you left it under your bed, that's where it was last time, right?" Kari responded with a sigh. She was just about to go back to watching the t.v. show when the phone rang. Kari picked up the phone then put her hand on the receiver and called to Tai, "Tai, Matt's on the phone, he wants to talk to you about something, sounds important."
Tai quickly stuck his head out from the bottom of the bunk bed where he was searching for his cd player. 'I wonder what's wrong. . ." Tai worried as he went to get the phone. "Yeah Matt, what's going on?" Tai spoke into the receiver as Kari walked to her room to give her brother some privacy.
Tai almost dropped the phone when Matt was finished telling him everything that had happened so far. "Matt, I know that it's hard to deal with the big fights your parents have, but still, you shouldn't have run away. . ." He tried to convince Matt.
"I had no other choice!" Matt told Tai on the other line. "It was just too hard to deal with anymore, it's just, the constant fighting and yelling. . . I just couldn't handle it anymore." He weakly told Tai.
"I guess it just got to you then. . ." Tai said. "Listen, Matt, where are you right now? It sounds like you need someone to listen to you for a while, maybe it will help if we just talked about it for a bit." He tried to console Matt. Matt told Tai he would meet him at the park. It was getting a bit late, so they would be able to get some privacy since not many people would be there, if any.
"Kari, I need to go outside for a second, if mom and dad get back before I do, just tell them that I went to the book store to pick up some video game books." Tai told his sister as he picked up his jacket and bolted out the door.
Matt sat on the bench, waiting for Tai to come. He desperately needed someone to talk to before he went insane from the stress. Even though it was beginning to get dark, there were still some people at the park. Matt looked to his left and saw a few kids about his brothers' age playing near the small lake at the center of the park. Then he turned to his right and saw another family walking happily around the park. Matt saw the three children and their two parents, they looked so happy, so. . . together. His thoughts were interrupted when he heard someone call out his name.
"Thank god." Matt sighed with relief when he saw Tai. "I was getting kind of tired of waiting." He said when Tai finally walked up to him.
"So Matt, what's the problem?" Tai said as he led Matt back to the bench.
"Whatever it is Matt, you know you can tell me." Tai consoled his love with a soft tone of caring in his voice. Tai would do anything he had to in order to help Matt feel better, just as Matt would do the same for him.
"Ok, I guess since you don't mind listening, I can finally tell someone." Matt decided as he stared at the floor.
Neither of the two knew how long it took for Matt to tell Tai all his frustrations and worries, but by the time Matt was done, it was very dark. Tai sat there the whole time, listening intently as Matt kept talking. Tai didn't care how long it took Matt to tell him everything, he was going to listen to all of it and do his best to support his love in his time of need.
"I just don't know what to Tai. . ." Matt concluded with a sigh as he turned to face Tai. He saw the look of caring on Tai's face as the other boy thought about what he should say. "Well Matt, I really don't know what else to say except that you will just have to get used to it, well, either that or tell your parents how you feel. I'm sure they have to be freaking out right now since you ran away." Tai took Matt into a loving embrace as he tried to comfort the other boy. For once, Matt didn't think about being ashamed to show vulnerability; it was actually comforting for him to know someone was there for him.
"I seriously wish I could help you with more than words, but you will have to deal with this without me, Matt" Tai admitted as he held on to him. "Other than that, I just hope things will turn out ok in the end, and I'm sure it will. Just tell them how you feel, If your parents really do love you, then they will do their best to make sure you aren't hurt like this anymore. . ." Tai whispered into Matt's ear. They both sat there for a few seconds, then finally broke off. Matt wiped off a few tears from his eyes then stood up from the bench.
"You're right, I need to tell them. I can't run and hide like this anymore, and I can't burst it out like crazy, I just need to talk with them about it, and hopefully they will be able to work something out." Matt thanked Tai with a kiss then walked off, back to his house. Tai looked at Matt the whole time, glad his love finally had made up his mind on what to do. After sitting on the bench for about a few minutes, Tai finally stood up, thoughtfully wished Matt the best, then walked back home as well.
@@@@@@@@@@@@@ A/n: Well, that's the end of the fic, I hope u enjoied reading it, because I enjoied making it. I know the ending is kinda rushed, mainly because I just wanted to finish this fic as soon as possible. I know I haven't written anything in about a month, but that's because I have been trying to learn to draw anime and ive also been caught up in other stuff, like, well. .. um, yeah. Anyway, questions, comments, whatever, can be sent to quake3rox@aol.com .
p.s: I am actually trying to orbit around like 5 fic ideas, so I will try to balance the anime drawing and writing time in order to keep writing on schedule, so expect more fics soon (
By: Me-Rite-Much
A/n: Lol, the funny thing is, I wrote most of this fic in two days, but for some reason I didn't finish it for about a month, but now I guess I might as well finish. Even though I have plenty of ideas for fics, I think I might take a small hiatus on writing my fics. I just O, and on one more side note, I forgot what the names of Matts parents were so im just gonna make it up. Now usually when I write angst fics, I try to find real, real tough subjects to deal with, but with this fic, I really dropped a few notches on how deep the subject is. O well, hope you enjoi anyway.
Disclaimer: I don't own digimon, Toei does.
@@@@@@@@@
"Damnit Mark, why do you have to keep bringing the kids into this, you leave them alone!" Mrs. Ishida screamed at her husband as they both argued fiercely in their apartment, Matt was in his room, while T.K. was sitting at the kitchen table doing his homework while he ignored the fighting. T.K. was still too small to truly be affected by the fighting, he just kept on with his homework while his parents while yelling at eachother just a few feet away from him. Matt's dad had just asked T.K. if he saw how his wife had just pushed him weakly out of anger. It was another fight that had begun out of something stupid, something that could be easily solvable If the two had just sat down and talked over it reasonably. T.K. was still very little, he didn't really pay much attention to the fighting. He was affected a bit, but not as much. Another reason T.K. didn't notice much was because he was listening to some kiddy cd he owned.
Even though T.K. didn't understand much, his older brother Matt understood a lot, especially about what was going on. Matt just stayed locked up in his room while his parents went about fighting. Matt's room was very messy, his T.V. on and at very high volume, some clothes on the floor, a few old school papers on the small table right next to his T.V. It wasn't really that messy, but it sure could have been tidied at least a bit. Then there was Matt, who simply sat on his bed, not even paying much attention to whatever T.V. show was on, he just desperately wanted to distract himself from the fighting going on just on the other side of the door. Even with the door in the way, Matt could still hear a lot of the screaming. "Damnit, stupid cheap ass door." Matt complained to himself as he tried to raise the volume on the television. He threw the remote on the floor in anger when he realized the T.V. reached it's volume maximum. "God damnit, I can still hear them." Matt said to himself.
He got so frustrated with the noise that he put a pillow over both his ears and tried to dig into his bed covers so the noise would stop. 'Finally, nice, peaceful quiet.' He thought as he finally smiled for the first time that day. The fighting never truly stopped at the Ishida residence. Matt's parents would fight about once every few months and it would go too far a lot. Unlike some other parents fighting, the ones Matt's parents had usually ended up with his dad packing up some things and living with his aunt for a few weeks. Many people might be relieved when their parents make up, but to Matt, it was just another setup for a big fall that would happen too soon. So many times had he been promised that the fighting would stop, and so many times had he been let down.
Matt simply couldn't take the constant fighting, then having to choose between his parents when his dad brought him into the fights. There were many incidents where his Mother would hit his Dad, and then he would approach his son and make sure he saw. "You see, you see how she hits me even though I'm doing nothing to her?!" His dad would say when his wife would give him weak hits of anger.
"Stop bringing your children into this!" Matt's mother would often retaliate when she saw her husband approach him during their fights. "Why do you always have to run to Matt and bring him into this, don't you know how terrible it makes him feel?!" Matt did agree with some things his mom said, he really did hate when his dad brought him into the fights, but he loved his dad, and if anything needed to be done, Matt had no other choice. That must have been why Matt often agreed to watch and see their fights so he could be a witness, all he had to do was count how many times any fists or open hands would be thrown by his mom. Matt's dad wasn't a violent man, so he had never raised his hand against his wife, but he did get mad and often yelled a lot.
His voice sometimes got so big that his wife would have to hush him forcefully and remind him that they had neighbors. Matt would often get mad and just close himself up in his room, either that or go visit Tai. Matt knew the only two reasons he did not run away or kill himself were Tai, and his little brother T.K.. Even though he was still very young, Matt was still really close to his boyfriend Tai. Ever since the digiworld, when Tai had finally admitted his feelings to him, Matt had loved to spend his time with the other boy. The only real problem was that they hadn't told anyone, even when they got back.
In the digiworld, Tai had relied on Matt's love a lot to get him through some tough times. Leading some kids into the unknown is very hard to deal with, especially in Tai's case because of how he felt for Matt. Tai felt so good once he and Matt were together, now he had someone he could truly open up to, because there were some things that Tai knew if he had told Kari or Sora, they would fuss and worry a lot. But Matt wasn't like that with Tai. Tai could tell Matt anything and he would listen, he wouldn't jump to conclusions or start to go crazy with worry, he would just listen, and then if it was something important, ask what he could do to help.
Even when Matt returned to the digiworld and he had to return to the fighting between his parents, he would still be the more dominant one in his relationship with Tai. Matt hated feeling weak, and he also hated it when others knew he was in a vulnerable state. He knew that no matter what, Tai would be there for him, but he always wanted to be the comforter, not the other way around; yet sometimes he just felt so weak inside, and he truly needed to be held and comforted the way he did to Tai many times before.
The fighting was getting louder, much to Matt's dismay. After a few minutes of watching T.V., he began getting a bit thirsty. The noise from the fighting seemed to have stopped, so Matt decided it was safe for him to go out of his room and get some soda from the fridge in the kitchen. Opening his door, Matt looked outside to see what happened in the living room. He looked around and saw what had happened. His mom was sitting on the kitchen table by T.K., writing down on some paper. His dad was in the bedroom, packing his things. It seemed like his dad was going to go back to his aunts again. Sighing out of frustration, Matt walked to the kitchen and took out some soda. He looked in the kitchen shelves right above him for a cup and quietly filled it with Soda while his parents were there.
Matt was about to go back to his room to enjoy his Coca-Cola when his father finally got out of the bedroom with the small suitcase and started confronting his wife again. "Listen, I'm going now ok, but you have some really messed up problems. I did not do anything to provoke you ok, Matt knows, he's seen how you hit me and I never lift a finger against you. . ."
"Stop brining our children into this!" His wife interrupted. "They have nothing to do with this, all of this is OUR problem, not theirs." She kept going on, and Matt's dad kept going on and on. Something started coming over Matt, he had no idea what, but after a few seconds of his parents fighting, he just clapped his hands over his ears and leaned on the kitchen counter. Every few weeks the yelling would start all over again. He was getting sick of the constant fighting, the constant worry of his parents making him choose between them.
He couldn't take it anymore. Matt opened his eyes and got in between the two of them. "Why can't you just stop this!? Why does the fighting kee happening!? Don't you know what this does!? We aren't even a real family! Both of you never get along, nothing changes! Every time you say you will stop, but for years nothing has happened! Can't you just divorce and get it over with?! Don't you care about me and T.K.!? Can't you let us be in peace for at least one month!?"
A few tears escaped his eyes as Matt realized what he had just done. Not knowing what else to do, Matt dashed out of the apartment. He heard his parents yelling after him, but Matt didn't want to go back. He couldn't take the fighting and the constant arguing anymore. He ran down the hallway, then rushed to the stairway of the apartment complex and quickly dashed down the few floors it took to reach the lobby.
He didn't know where to go or what to do next, but he simply couldn't stay there anymore. Right now the only thing on Matt's mind was talking to Tai. He couldn't hold it in anymore, he needed to tell somebody how tired he felt on the inside. Matt hated to show weakness, but now he had no other choice, he knew Tai wouldn't fuss or get worried either, which made it first priority for Matt.
"Hey Kari, have you seen my C-D player anywhere?" Tai called out from his room while Kari was watching T.V. in the living room.
"No, but I think you left it under your bed, that's where it was last time, right?" Kari responded with a sigh. She was just about to go back to watching the t.v. show when the phone rang. Kari picked up the phone then put her hand on the receiver and called to Tai, "Tai, Matt's on the phone, he wants to talk to you about something, sounds important."
Tai quickly stuck his head out from the bottom of the bunk bed where he was searching for his cd player. 'I wonder what's wrong. . ." Tai worried as he went to get the phone. "Yeah Matt, what's going on?" Tai spoke into the receiver as Kari walked to her room to give her brother some privacy.
Tai almost dropped the phone when Matt was finished telling him everything that had happened so far. "Matt, I know that it's hard to deal with the big fights your parents have, but still, you shouldn't have run away. . ." He tried to convince Matt.
"I had no other choice!" Matt told Tai on the other line. "It was just too hard to deal with anymore, it's just, the constant fighting and yelling. . . I just couldn't handle it anymore." He weakly told Tai.
"I guess it just got to you then. . ." Tai said. "Listen, Matt, where are you right now? It sounds like you need someone to listen to you for a while, maybe it will help if we just talked about it for a bit." He tried to console Matt. Matt told Tai he would meet him at the park. It was getting a bit late, so they would be able to get some privacy since not many people would be there, if any.
"Kari, I need to go outside for a second, if mom and dad get back before I do, just tell them that I went to the book store to pick up some video game books." Tai told his sister as he picked up his jacket and bolted out the door.
Matt sat on the bench, waiting for Tai to come. He desperately needed someone to talk to before he went insane from the stress. Even though it was beginning to get dark, there were still some people at the park. Matt looked to his left and saw a few kids about his brothers' age playing near the small lake at the center of the park. Then he turned to his right and saw another family walking happily around the park. Matt saw the three children and their two parents, they looked so happy, so. . . together. His thoughts were interrupted when he heard someone call out his name.
"Thank god." Matt sighed with relief when he saw Tai. "I was getting kind of tired of waiting." He said when Tai finally walked up to him.
"So Matt, what's the problem?" Tai said as he led Matt back to the bench.
"Whatever it is Matt, you know you can tell me." Tai consoled his love with a soft tone of caring in his voice. Tai would do anything he had to in order to help Matt feel better, just as Matt would do the same for him.
"Ok, I guess since you don't mind listening, I can finally tell someone." Matt decided as he stared at the floor.
Neither of the two knew how long it took for Matt to tell Tai all his frustrations and worries, but by the time Matt was done, it was very dark. Tai sat there the whole time, listening intently as Matt kept talking. Tai didn't care how long it took Matt to tell him everything, he was going to listen to all of it and do his best to support his love in his time of need.
"I just don't know what to Tai. . ." Matt concluded with a sigh as he turned to face Tai. He saw the look of caring on Tai's face as the other boy thought about what he should say. "Well Matt, I really don't know what else to say except that you will just have to get used to it, well, either that or tell your parents how you feel. I'm sure they have to be freaking out right now since you ran away." Tai took Matt into a loving embrace as he tried to comfort the other boy. For once, Matt didn't think about being ashamed to show vulnerability; it was actually comforting for him to know someone was there for him.
"I seriously wish I could help you with more than words, but you will have to deal with this without me, Matt" Tai admitted as he held on to him. "Other than that, I just hope things will turn out ok in the end, and I'm sure it will. Just tell them how you feel, If your parents really do love you, then they will do their best to make sure you aren't hurt like this anymore. . ." Tai whispered into Matt's ear. They both sat there for a few seconds, then finally broke off. Matt wiped off a few tears from his eyes then stood up from the bench.
"You're right, I need to tell them. I can't run and hide like this anymore, and I can't burst it out like crazy, I just need to talk with them about it, and hopefully they will be able to work something out." Matt thanked Tai with a kiss then walked off, back to his house. Tai looked at Matt the whole time, glad his love finally had made up his mind on what to do. After sitting on the bench for about a few minutes, Tai finally stood up, thoughtfully wished Matt the best, then walked back home as well.
@@@@@@@@@@@@@ A/n: Well, that's the end of the fic, I hope u enjoied reading it, because I enjoied making it. I know the ending is kinda rushed, mainly because I just wanted to finish this fic as soon as possible. I know I haven't written anything in about a month, but that's because I have been trying to learn to draw anime and ive also been caught up in other stuff, like, well. .. um, yeah. Anyway, questions, comments, whatever, can be sent to quake3rox@aol.com .
p.s: I am actually trying to orbit around like 5 fic ideas, so I will try to balance the anime drawing and writing time in order to keep writing on schedule, so expect more fics soon (