Yet another poor parody of a Barenaked Ladies song. This one is about Harry Potter's veiw on Professor Snape and his potions class. This one is a parody of their song "These Apples" off of their live album 'Rock Spectecal'. (It's on another album aswell, but I can't remember which one). As I've stated before, I don't own anything, but I did make up the lyrics alone, so I guess I sort of own them. **I would like to appologise, but like in the other parodies, some lines are a bit too long to fit in to the music smoothly with out being said very quickly. Sorry. ** If you have any corrections to make about any of my work, please let me know about them at my e-mail address: sara86@msn.com _________________________________________________________

Parody Lyrics by Sailor Aeris

These Bertie Botts

He gave me a mandrake, said it was fatal

I've never been good with plants.

Next presentation at me he threw a dictionary,

'circled the word "dumb***"

Unentusiastic, not very drastic, I wrote his name on the test

and when he beheld it, he said I misspelled it, 10 points from the whole class

These Bertie Botts are delicious, "As a matter of fact they aren't" he said

What flavor is the green?

Gave us a pile homework as thick as a text book book

I was sure I would fail

I did it all carefully, turned it in on time

and passed by his grading scale

Never been frightened of being enlightened

but some lectures go to far (to far to far)

Sometimes I stammer, or mix up my grammer

and it makes me pick my scar

These Bertie Botts are delicious, "As a matter of fact they aren't" he said

What flavor is the green? (Greeeeee----n)

Didn't mean to get every question on the test wrong

'just wanna pass the class

Sometimes he is just too darn headstrong

'Wish that he would just get fired

I hope it's soon

Wondering what evil plan he's conspired

What's he conspired?

What's he conspired?

These Bertie Botts are delicious. "As a matter of fact they aren't" he said.

What flavor is the green? (Kelp?)

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Original Lyrics by Barenaked Ladies

'These Apples'

A friend brought me flowers, she said they were lilacs

But I've never been good with plants

Her next presentation, a new dictionary

She'd circled the word "romance"

So enthusiastic, a little bit drastic

I shaved her name in my head

And as she beheld it, she said I misspelled it;

Need more be said?

[Chorus:]

These apples are delicious!

"As a matter of fact they are," she said

Can all this fruit be free?

She wrote me a letter as big as a phonebook

I've never been big on mail

I sent her a postcard from somewhere near Lethebridge

And wondered if it still went by rail



I've never been frightened of being enlightened

But some things can go too far

Though sometimes I stammer and mix up my grammar,

You get what my meanings are

[Chorus]

I'm not trying to sing a love song - I'm trying to sing in tune.

I know I am sometimes headstrong

Falling love, catching fire - I want to be consumed

Wondering will I ever tire, will I ever tire??

[Chorus] _____________________________________ Well, there's Chapter 3. If you have any requests, comments, questions, or corrections to make, please write a review! Thank you for reading this! NOTE: I will be changing the name of this fanfic soon.