Title: Life As I Know It
Chapter 12: Doing the Splits on a Crate of Dynamite
Disclaimer: I do not own the Gilmore Girls, cause I'm really stupid and I could never think of it on my own, and I didn't start watching it till the reruns of the first season. And I still missed the season finale. Why? Who knows?
A/N: It's here! It's really here! This is the highly aniticipated labor of Lorelai and birth of Rory! Yay! (Oh, and there's a lot of cussing in this story from the mouth of the sailor-on-leave herself: Lorelai.)
~~~~~
November 7, 1984
11:00 pm
Lorelai lay sprawled across her bed with the covers up to her chin. Within two seconds she threw the covers on the floor. She rolled over and out of the bed. She paced around the room. She was miserable and fat. Very fat. Her ankles were huge. The only thing she could do was lay around, but that got tiring after a while, and she always got her second wind about the time she should have been drifting off to dream-land. She decided to grab some ice cream and drift off to TV land.
Lorelai wrapped her robe almost all the way around herself and waddled over to the door. She was turning the knob when there was a knock on her window. She turned around to see Christopher.
Lorelai hadn't seen Christopher since his birthday party. She'd spent the entire four hours in his room, and only came down once, to find Christopher slow-dancing with the town slut. Incredibly hurt, she'd avoided him since. And now here he was, on her doorstep, so to speak. She headed over to the window and pushed it open.
"Lor, I gotta talk to you."
"Fine. What do you want?"
"Well, I've got some news."
"What is it?"
"I'm moving to California."
"What? Why?"
"Well, Dad started talking about going to Princeton, and I just started freaking out, and so I'm leaving."
"You mean you're going by yourself?"
"Yeah, I guess I'm running away."
Lorelai stepped onto the balcony and looked down to see Christopher's car of the week with boxes stacked in the backseat. She stared, shocked, at Christopher, and then back at the car. It felt like someone was stabbing her in her chest. Tears were running down her face and Chris took her into his arms. The feeling in her chest subsided, but it was replaced by the same feeling in her stomach. She gasped and leaned closer to Chris. They both gasped as her water broke and flowed down her legs. Chris sprang into action and led her through the window to her room, and then down the stairs, out the front door, into his crowded car. He started the Rolls-Royce and sped out of the driveway.
~~~~~~
Emily ran into the hospital.
"Lorelai Gilmore?" she demanded.
"Yes, just a second. Please sit down in the waiting area." The receptionist, on the phone, spouted the standard response and waved vaugely to the area behind Emily. Emily would not tolerate that.
"My baby girl is having a baby! Now where the hell is Maternity?" Emily pressed the button on the phone that disconnected it. The receptionist, used to this kind of abuse, pointed to the sign behind her listing the departments and floors. Maternity was on the fifth floor, so Emily headed to the elavator, Richard trailing behind her.
~~~~~~
Christopher was in pain. Lots and lots of pain. His hand felt like it was broken. Lorelai's contraction passed and she released his hand. He rubbed it for only a few seconds before Lorelai grabbed it back. She used it to slap Christopher in the head about fifty times.
"I hate you! You had sex with me, you son of a bitch, and now I'm lying on this goddamn table with my legs spread as far apart as they can be so I can squeeze a pot roast out of an acorn! Now get the fuck out of my sight! You're pissing me off!"
"Okay." Christopher turned tail and ran out of the room, almost running into Emily. Emily looked at Chris and started yelling at him for putting her baby through all of this pain. Chris sank into a chair and tried to tune her out.
Meanwhile, in what was Lorelai's hell, Dr. Joelle came in with another man.
"Lorelai, this is Dr. Bookter. He's going to be giving you an epidural."
"Oh, so you guys are finally getting off your asses and making my stay here comfortable?"
"Ah, the joys of motherhood." Dr. Bookter laughed to Dr. Joelle.
"Yeah, ha-ha, it's so funny. Shut up!!!"
Dr. Joelle headed out of the door. A nurse came in and handed Lorelai a cup of ice chips. Lorelai threw a handful at her, and then at Dr. Bookter as he came closer.
A few minutes later, Lorelai was totally in love with him. She smiled dazedly at him as he walked out of the door and Dr. Joelle walked in.
"Okay, Lorelai, it's time to push."
"God, no."
~~~~~~
What seemed like hours and yet minutes later, a little bundle of blankets was placed in Lorelai's arms. She stared into her daughter's eyes with nothing but love.
"Do we have a name?" A smiling nurse asked.
"Demerol."
"A real name."
"Lorelai Leigh Gilmore."
"For the baby?"
"Yes, for the baby. Men name their children after themselves, why can't I?"
"Okay." The nurse copied the name onto the birth certificate and left the room. Lorelai looked at little Lorelai. Little Lorelai yawned and closed her eyes. Lorelai followed suit.
~~~~~
Christopher slowly pushed the door open, remembering the last time he'd been in the hospital with Lorelai. He caught glimpse of his daughter in Lorelai's arms and edged over to her. He pulled up a chair and sat next to the bed and just stared at the two of them sleeping. Lorelai opened her eyes.
"Hi." She whispered softly, surprised to see Chris.
"Hi." He whispered back.
"You wanna hold her?" Lorelai held the baby closer to Chris. Chris took her.
"What's her name?"
"Lorelai Leigh Gilmore. But I'm gonna call her Rory." They were silent for a few minutes. Chris's eyes never left Rory's face as he rocked her slowly in his arms. "I thought you were going to California."
"Well, I had to see my baby first."
"Are you going to stay?"
"No."
"It's better this way. You can do what you need to do without having to worry about a family."
"What are you going to do, Lorelai?" Chris stopped rocking.
"I've got something in mind."
Lorelai's mind flashed back to Stars Hollow and the Inn, and she knew what she had to do.
Chapter 12: Doing the Splits on a Crate of Dynamite
Disclaimer: I do not own the Gilmore Girls, cause I'm really stupid and I could never think of it on my own, and I didn't start watching it till the reruns of the first season. And I still missed the season finale. Why? Who knows?
A/N: It's here! It's really here! This is the highly aniticipated labor of Lorelai and birth of Rory! Yay! (Oh, and there's a lot of cussing in this story from the mouth of the sailor-on-leave herself: Lorelai.)
~~~~~
November 7, 1984
11:00 pm
Lorelai lay sprawled across her bed with the covers up to her chin. Within two seconds she threw the covers on the floor. She rolled over and out of the bed. She paced around the room. She was miserable and fat. Very fat. Her ankles were huge. The only thing she could do was lay around, but that got tiring after a while, and she always got her second wind about the time she should have been drifting off to dream-land. She decided to grab some ice cream and drift off to TV land.
Lorelai wrapped her robe almost all the way around herself and waddled over to the door. She was turning the knob when there was a knock on her window. She turned around to see Christopher.
Lorelai hadn't seen Christopher since his birthday party. She'd spent the entire four hours in his room, and only came down once, to find Christopher slow-dancing with the town slut. Incredibly hurt, she'd avoided him since. And now here he was, on her doorstep, so to speak. She headed over to the window and pushed it open.
"Lor, I gotta talk to you."
"Fine. What do you want?"
"Well, I've got some news."
"What is it?"
"I'm moving to California."
"What? Why?"
"Well, Dad started talking about going to Princeton, and I just started freaking out, and so I'm leaving."
"You mean you're going by yourself?"
"Yeah, I guess I'm running away."
Lorelai stepped onto the balcony and looked down to see Christopher's car of the week with boxes stacked in the backseat. She stared, shocked, at Christopher, and then back at the car. It felt like someone was stabbing her in her chest. Tears were running down her face and Chris took her into his arms. The feeling in her chest subsided, but it was replaced by the same feeling in her stomach. She gasped and leaned closer to Chris. They both gasped as her water broke and flowed down her legs. Chris sprang into action and led her through the window to her room, and then down the stairs, out the front door, into his crowded car. He started the Rolls-Royce and sped out of the driveway.
~~~~~~
Emily ran into the hospital.
"Lorelai Gilmore?" she demanded.
"Yes, just a second. Please sit down in the waiting area." The receptionist, on the phone, spouted the standard response and waved vaugely to the area behind Emily. Emily would not tolerate that.
"My baby girl is having a baby! Now where the hell is Maternity?" Emily pressed the button on the phone that disconnected it. The receptionist, used to this kind of abuse, pointed to the sign behind her listing the departments and floors. Maternity was on the fifth floor, so Emily headed to the elavator, Richard trailing behind her.
~~~~~~
Christopher was in pain. Lots and lots of pain. His hand felt like it was broken. Lorelai's contraction passed and she released his hand. He rubbed it for only a few seconds before Lorelai grabbed it back. She used it to slap Christopher in the head about fifty times.
"I hate you! You had sex with me, you son of a bitch, and now I'm lying on this goddamn table with my legs spread as far apart as they can be so I can squeeze a pot roast out of an acorn! Now get the fuck out of my sight! You're pissing me off!"
"Okay." Christopher turned tail and ran out of the room, almost running into Emily. Emily looked at Chris and started yelling at him for putting her baby through all of this pain. Chris sank into a chair and tried to tune her out.
Meanwhile, in what was Lorelai's hell, Dr. Joelle came in with another man.
"Lorelai, this is Dr. Bookter. He's going to be giving you an epidural."
"Oh, so you guys are finally getting off your asses and making my stay here comfortable?"
"Ah, the joys of motherhood." Dr. Bookter laughed to Dr. Joelle.
"Yeah, ha-ha, it's so funny. Shut up!!!"
Dr. Joelle headed out of the door. A nurse came in and handed Lorelai a cup of ice chips. Lorelai threw a handful at her, and then at Dr. Bookter as he came closer.
A few minutes later, Lorelai was totally in love with him. She smiled dazedly at him as he walked out of the door and Dr. Joelle walked in.
"Okay, Lorelai, it's time to push."
"God, no."
~~~~~~
What seemed like hours and yet minutes later, a little bundle of blankets was placed in Lorelai's arms. She stared into her daughter's eyes with nothing but love.
"Do we have a name?" A smiling nurse asked.
"Demerol."
"A real name."
"Lorelai Leigh Gilmore."
"For the baby?"
"Yes, for the baby. Men name their children after themselves, why can't I?"
"Okay." The nurse copied the name onto the birth certificate and left the room. Lorelai looked at little Lorelai. Little Lorelai yawned and closed her eyes. Lorelai followed suit.
~~~~~
Christopher slowly pushed the door open, remembering the last time he'd been in the hospital with Lorelai. He caught glimpse of his daughter in Lorelai's arms and edged over to her. He pulled up a chair and sat next to the bed and just stared at the two of them sleeping. Lorelai opened her eyes.
"Hi." She whispered softly, surprised to see Chris.
"Hi." He whispered back.
"You wanna hold her?" Lorelai held the baby closer to Chris. Chris took her.
"What's her name?"
"Lorelai Leigh Gilmore. But I'm gonna call her Rory." They were silent for a few minutes. Chris's eyes never left Rory's face as he rocked her slowly in his arms. "I thought you were going to California."
"Well, I had to see my baby first."
"Are you going to stay?"
"No."
"It's better this way. You can do what you need to do without having to worry about a family."
"What are you going to do, Lorelai?" Chris stopped rocking.
"I've got something in mind."
Lorelai's mind flashed back to Stars Hollow and the Inn, and she knew what she had to do.