Chapter 9

We would make a great team.

Sunnydale CA, Buffy's house (8.30 AM)

Buffy didn't go back to sleep after Anya left, she simply couldn't. She just sat on the couch, completly shocked. She finally remembered she had to wake up Dawn, and that Xander was driving her to school. She had been so caught up in her thoughts that she completly lost track ot time, he would be here any minute now. She went to Dawn's room to wake her up. Dawn had just gotten out of bed and, reluctantly, headed into the bathroom when she heard a knock on the door.

Xander stood infront of Buffy's house, telling himself that everything would be oke. She opened the door and suddenly he was less sure about that. The only thing that he was aware of is that he had a difficult decision to make.

Buffy had decided that she wouldn't bring up what she heard from Anya. She put on her plastic smile and began to say hello.

'Hey Xand, why didn't you tell me that you still have feelings for me ?'

She wanted to hit herself. Why could she never keep her mouth shut... Meanwhile Xander just stared at her, not believing what she just said. Finally his mind was able to produce an answer.

'Is anything private in this town ? I had a dream and Lorne knows. I find out I still have feelings for you and somehow you know. Can't a guy get some privacy to figure stuff out...'

She smiled at him, even if it was half a smile.

' Ohhh God...sorry Xand, didn't mean to drop that bomb on you like that.'

She wanted to continue when Dawn came rushing down the stairs.

'Oke, I'm ready. Not really clean or fed, but ready. Let's go, I can't be late again. I'll get detention.'

She was gone, already heading to the car. Xander looked at Buffy.

'We'll talk about this later, oke ?'

She nodded. Behind him Dawn was having a fit.

'XANDER ! HURRY UP !'

He grinned.

'It looks like duty calls....loud... See ye later Buff.'

'Yeah, bye Xand.'

She closed the door. Cursing herself for her big mouth. How the hell would she get trough the talk they were going to have later ? Little did she know that Xander was thinking the same thing while driving Dawn to school.

Sunnydale CA, Xander's appartment. (8.45 AM)

Anya was in the middle of her chant to call on D'Hoffryn when there was a knock on the door. Sighing, she headed to the door. To see a still smoking blanket in front of her.

'Spike ! What the hell are you doing here ?'

'Came to talk to you, love.'

He trew of the blanket, since there was no sun in the hallway and wanted to walk into the appartment. Only he couldn't.

'That's right, Little Robin Hood never invited me in.'

Anya just stared at him, wondering what brought him here. Meanwhile he looked past her, into the livingroom.

'Ah, you were working some magic huh... So I take it you know that an unnamed slayer is in love with a certain dweep.'

She just nodded.

'Why do you care ?'

'You know I love her.'

'Yeah, and we all find that creepy and very disturbing. Again, what do you want ?'

He gave her a smile.

'I want you and I to team up. I know you don't want to see those two together. You're in love with the carpenter.'

'I don't want your help. I'm doing fine on my own.'

'No your not, love, you are working magic to keep him. That's not doing fine on your own, that's forcing somebody to stay with you.'

'It's not,  I'm just making sure Xander will choose me. Where he belongs.'

'I slept with her.'

Anya couldn't believe she was hearing it right.

'You what ?'

'I slept with our little slayer, and something tells me that Wonder Boy isn't going to love that idea.'

'Your lying. Buffy would never sleep with you.'

'She did, and you can thank heaven for that, because there is no bloody way he wants to be with her when he finds out.'

Anya knew there was a good change he was right. Xander was disgusted by vampires, and even more disgusted with Spike. Maybe the thought of Buffy and Spike together would make the decision he had to make easy.

'Maybe your right,  but I still don't see how this is going to help. Buffy isn't going to tell him and if we do it...well... we will be the bad guys.'

'Yeah, but I don't care if I'm the bad guy, pet.'

'Than what do you need me for ?'

'I need you to work your charms om him after I tell him. Make him see what he will give up if he goes after Buffy.'

'So you think that if we put 'Buffy who slept with Spike' against me, his loving girlfriend, he will choose me ?'

'Yeah, I mean, why wouldn't he ?'

Anya nodded.

' Go...  Make plans to tell him.'

He grinned.

'Be seeing you pet.'

And he was gone. She closed the door.

'Sorry Buff, but...I  just love him too much.'

Buffy's house ( 7.00 PM)

Xander pulled up in front of Buffy's house. He had a hard day at work, not concentrating on anything. He couldn't keep thoughts of Anya and Buffy out of his head. It was just too much. He loved Anya, but Buffy...well, she had always been special to him. She was Buffy. And to make matters worse she knew he had feelings for her. It also came to him that he never asked her how she found out. Sighing he got out of the car, they needed to talk.

Buffy was pacing the room, she was expecting Xander any second now. He hadn't called but she just knew that he would stop by after work. At that moment the doorbell rang and despite the fact that her life was a mess she smiled. She could always count on Xander.

Xander took a deap breath when she opened the door.

'How did you know ?'

She had expected the question.

'Come in, can I get you a drink ?'

He walked into the house.

'No Buff, I just want to know how you knew. Did Lorne tell you, because if he did I'm never trusting that guy again. And since I already have trust issues when it comes to demons...I mean...'

She interrupted.

'It was Anya.'

Xander heard her say the words but had a little trouble understanding them. It was Anya...As if his life wasn't complicated enough his fiancee knew he had feelings for another woman. His life couldn't get any better than this.

'She knows...An knows ?'

'Yeah, she heard the conversation between you and Lorne. And this morning she came to tell me that she wouldn't let you go without a fight.'

'Ohh...So what did you tell her ? I mean, you probably told her that I was your 'Xander shaped' friend but I'm still curious.'

Buffy wanted to lie to him, but she couldn't any more. It was too hard, these feelings were to strong. And even though she knew that she would complicate matters even more for Xander, she just needed to tell him. He needed to know, so that he could make a desiscion.

'Well..I kinda told her something different.'

'You told her something different...What did you tell her ?'

'I told her the truth.'

'Oke...which is ?'

She gathered all her courage.

'I love you.'

'I love you too Buff,  you know that, now please tell me what you told her.'

She couldn't believe that he was that stupid. Until she realised that he had told himself that she could never love him that way years ago. And now, well..his brain probably denied any information that said otherwise. She tried again.

'You don't get it Xand, I told her that I love you. Not in the friend way, although I do, but in the 'in love' way.'

Xander's world stopped. He just stared at the girl in front of him. And stayed that way.

'Xander, Xand !! Ehh...please say something. Make a stupid joke, do something, cause...this is kinda scary.'

He found his voice.

'I need to sit.'

'You're already sitting.'

'Right, knew that.'

And he stopped talking again.

Buffy's house (8.00 PM)

Buffy was really freaking out by now, Xander still hadn't said a word. Well, that wasn't really true, he had talked. Only not about what she had told him. He had been sitting on the couch for a couple of minutes, completly in shock.  Buf after a while he had smiled at her. At first she had been relieved, but than he had turned on the tv and started chatting like nothing happened. She had decided that she would play along, since he clearly wasn't ready to talk about it yet. But after nearly an hour she couldn't take it anymore.

'Oke Xand, enough !! Stop talking about a rerun off Friends. I just told you that I'm in love with you. We have to talk about this.'

At first he wouldn't look at her, but slowly he turned to her.

'Talk about this...talk about this !!  Oke Buff, let's talk about this. Let's talk about the fact that my life is a bad soap opera. Let's talk about the fact that I just found out you wished my girlfriend away and that I have feelings for you. Let's talk about the fact that there is Anya, the girl I asked to marry me, who knows that I'm torned between her and someone else. And finally let's talk about the fact that now you tell me you love me !!'

'I know it's difficult Xand...'

'Difficult... That's a big understatement. I mean, the fact that you love me changes so much. Before this, the choice was hard but one I could make. On the one hand I had you, my best friend, and than there was Anya, my lover. It would have picked Anya, because I love her and she loves me and you and I are just friends. Although there is probably always a part of my that thinks of you as more than my best friend. But now, now...you love me too, and...I just don't know anymore.'

He got up from the couch.

'I gotta go Buff, this is too much right now. I need to think.'

She knew she had to let him go.

'Can you just promise me that, at least, I will never lose you as my best friend ?'

He nodded.

'You know Buffy, Willow and Xander are unbreakable.'

She smiled, despite her tears.

'Yeah, I know.'

He walked to the door. She stopped him.

'Be careful on your way home. A lot of bad things out there.'

'Yeah...bye.'

He was gone.

Xander stepped out of Buffy's house, not allowing himself to think too much. He thought back of his days in highschool and how different that had been. They were fighting the big bad and he had been busy hating Angel. Life was simple, not easy, but at least not the big mess it was now.

'Hi there Xander !'

He turned around to see Spike.

'Great, a forced conversation with a guy I hate. At least it can't make my day any worse.'

'Yeah, you just wait and see about that.'

'Oke, I think this talk has been long enough. Be seeing you, have fun standing behind the tree in front of Buffy's house waiting for her to undress in front of the window.'

Spike laughed.

'Already seen it Wonderboy.'

'You're sad.'

'Maybe, but that wasn't what Buffy was panting when I was giving her the night of her life. Poor girl... probably never had any decent sex with Angel and the little soldier boy so she had a lot to catch up on.'

Xander turned around, a grin on his face.

'Finally ! Something funny about this day, do you really think that I believe Buffy had sex with you. C'mon, she wouldn't touch you if the world depended on it.'

'Things change boy, Buffy touched me and believe me when I say she touched me real good.'

Xander looked at the vampire, suprised to see the convidence on his face.

'You're lying.'

Spike started to walk away.

'Why don't you ask her. The look on her face will tell you everything you need to know.'

Xander just watched him go, and wanted to go home. But somehow the look on Spike's face had put some doubt in his mind. He just needed to be reassured by Buffy that the vampire was talking crap. So, he went back.

Buffy was sitting in her livingroom, feeling depressed. Remembering the hurt and confusion of Xander. At that moment the doorbell rang. She got up to see Xander there. She felt relieved.

'Oh, thank God you came back, I was worried about you and I'm so glad you decided we need to talk about this.'

She smiled at him, but he didn't smile back.

'Did you have sex with Spike ?'

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TBC...