Title: Joyless
Rating: PG-13 for language
Summary: Sydney deals with Francie's death
Disclaimer: JJ Abrams, Touchstone, and ABC own Alias and it's characters. I
don't. I just obsess over them. But that's healthy, right?
A/N: Please, please, please review. I'm pretty sure I need reviews like I need
oxygen. Or is that ice cream?
Thank you for your all your kind reviews. I really appreciate it.
...give her false intel... lay a trap for Sloane... Kendall was giving his debrief on the current situation. Sydney was having a difficult time concentrating on what was being said. Her eyes were fixed on the corner of the table she sat at, but all she saw was Francie's body. Why hadn't she been there to save Francie? How was Sydney going to tell Francie's family?
Sydney? Are you listening? Kendall asked, glaring at her.
Sydney took a sharp breath and bit her lower lip to keep the tears in. Yes, you want me to lay a trap for Sloane, by giving the double false information.
"Yes, do you think you can pull yourself together enough to do that? Kendall asked accusingly.
It was Sydney's turn to glare. How dare he question her professionalism at a
time like this. Had he just lost his best friend? Was he the one being asked to pretend it hadn't happened? No, he was just the one giving orders. He didn't have a clue how this felt. As if he knew how anything felt.
Sydney is doing just fine, given the circumstances, Vaughn answered, doing
his best to protect Sydney.
Fine. Let's put the plan in motion. With that Kendall left the conference room, leaving Sydney, Vaughn, and Jack alone.
How are you holding up? Jack asked gently, as he walked over to the other two agents.
Sydney slowly looked up at him, her eyes full of sorrow. I'm all right, she lied. Sydney knew her dad would be able to see through her blatant lie, but she didn't have the strength to figure out the real answer to his question.
I've just come from seeing Will, Jack said. He's... handling the news the
best he can. He's worried about you.
Sydney asked as she shook her head. Why is anybody worrying about her? Didn't they know that's how you got killed?
He cares about you, Jack stated. We all care about you. You have to know
we'll do anything to help you through this.
At any other time, a statement like this from her usually distant father would have brought up some emotion from her. But Sydney was too filled with despair to
feel anything else. I'm fine, was all Sydney could respond with.
Jack desperately looked at Vaughn, hoping Vaughn could help Sydney. Vaughn
nodded, understanding Jack's silent message. Vaughn stood up next to Sydney and tenderly placed a hand on her back. You ready to go home? Vaughn asked softly.
Sydney replied looking up at Vaughn. The one comfort she had was Vaughn. He was the only comfort she allowed herself to have. She sighed and stood up next to him. Vaughn took Sydney's hand and interlaced his fingers through hers, and led her out of the conference room, as Jack looked on helplessly.
She's not answering her cell phone, Sydney said as she placed the phone back in its cradle. And she's not at the restaurant, and she's not here. Where the hell is she? Sydney was annoyed at the disappearance of the double. She just wanted to get this mission over with, so she could get this double out of her life.
Did she say she was going anywhere? Vaughn asked, trying to gauge what the situation was now.
Sydney said with increased irritation. She was just sitting on that damn
couch, watching our every move. She hit her palm against the wall. She couldn't kill the double if she disappeared. She couldn't trap Sloane without the double. Sydney was at a standstill without the stupid bitchy double.
Vaughn placed his hands on Sydney's arms, trying to calm her down. Do you
think she knew she was made?
Sydney sighed, with Will no where in sight and the two of us not staying in a room with her for more than a minute.
Yeah, she probably figured it out. And Sloane wouldn't want her around if they
knew we knew she was a double.
Sydney walked away from Vaughn, screaming, Then what the hell are we going to do now? How do we get Sloane now?
Sydney didn't remember much from Francie's funeral. She knew it reminded her of Danny's funeral. She knew she cried. But she was still in shock from failing again to get justice for Danny's and now Francie's murders. She wondered how many more people were going to be added to that list.
It had been two weeks since the funeral. She had yet to return to work, still not able to function properly. She was now at Francie's grave, at Vaughn's insistence. Sydney knew Vaughn didn't quite know how to help her through this. What Vaughn didn't know was that just by him being there, he was helping, that his presence was all Sydney needed, was all she would ever need.
Hi Francie, Sydney started, her eyes brimming with tears and her lips quivering. God, I miss you so much. I'm not sure how I'm going to go on without you. You were always there when I needed you, even though I could never tell you the truth. I hate that you died with those lies between us... I wish I would have told you everything. I was afraid after what they did to Danny, and what happened to Will...
But apparently that didn't matter. No matter how you're in my life, you're going to get hurt, Sydney choked out, as tears streamed down her face. She fell to her knees on the freshly patched grass, facing the newly etched tombstone. She sobbed, crying until she didn't have any tears left in her.
Sydney caught her breath and wiped her face of the tears. I wish you could have met Michael. He has been amazing. I finally realized that I love him, that I've loved him for a long time now. Which is the scariest thing for me. Letting someone into my life and have him mean so much to me. If I lose him, I know I won't survive.
The woman that replaced you disappeared. We're pretty sure she went back to
Sloane. Right now we're back at square one on locating him. But I promise you Francie, Sloane will pay for what he has done to you, and Danny...and me.
Fin
