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'You see, haldir, you were just behaving in an inappropriate way today ,' says lord elrond gravely. 'I know myself that elladan might not be the most charming person around but you got to him respect, just because he is my son.'
Hm? Did somebody say something ? I'm waking out of a deep stupor in a chair in front of elrond's frightening lawyer-like desk. Did he talk to me ? Freak, did he probably ask something ? Bloody hell, if he wouldn't have summarized my whole days-schedule up to now I wouldn't have started thinking about some ~naughty~ things I'd like to try with someone in the future and I'd know now what this is all about.
'I fully understand ,' I say, hoping it might pass as an answer.
'Good. But I still have to sentence you to some kind of compensation. Just to remind you not to offend my son again.'
Sorry, WHAT ? I must have dozed off, you can't be talking about me ! Hey, hey, it wasn't that bad ! I'm not a crimino-elf who needs to be sentenced ! To what, anyway ? Prison ? Torture ? Public beheading ? Eew, I'm feeling all woozy.
'You're going to teach Elladan and Elrohir your knowledge of archery .'
No way! Listen, big boss, no. I can't, I just can't be left alone with the two maggots wriggling about and around me all the time asking dumb questions until my brain oozes out my ears! My nerves are like french silk, you can't strain 'em.
'Did you hear me ?'
I notice that my mouth hangs open and my eyes became all glazed in shock.
'Yes . yes, I did. But . couldn't you think of something else. Pretty please ?'
'No. It has to be a punishment in the end. Even though I can't find something bad about spending some quality time with my sons.'
'No, of course, there's nothing bad, I'm just so clumsy when dealing with kids.'
Please, please, tell me, you don't want your sons in the hands of a clumsy kid-hating impatient maniac-archer from loriƩn! There's gotta be something else! Teaching them all ~I~ know will take a long, long time ! Well, I don't have to admit that I know more than everybody knows I know. So it might be only three weeks, a month. But a month with elladan .? On the other hand , with elrohir ? I could imagine spending some quality time with ~him~ . *wicked smile* (Note here : This is PG-rated, I am thinking of playing a nice board-game together.) And I know that he's elrond's favorite kid. What a sweet revenge on elrond for this humiliating punishment it would be if I'd seduce . uh, tempt elrohir to play some chess.
'Oh, well. Then, how about helping with the horses ?'
'No, no. I just reconsidered the matter. I would feel very honored to teach your sons the art of archery.'
Stunned silence. I didn't talk in a polite manner for a thousand years, I guess.
'All right, then. You can start tomorrow morning, at sunrise in the gardens. This would be all. You may leave.'
Thank you. But SUNRISE ??? I'm not a morning person and who can guarantee that I won't just kill elladan if he jerks about ? Another problem, I don't ~look~ good in the early morning hours, because I'm a night-owl. I am going to have shades under my eyes darker than any darkness in moria. Oh god!
The dinner in the evening is not as pleasant as usual, because elladan keeps glaring at me. Obviously my punishment doesn't suit him which makes me feel a lot better about it. I get to show off with my knowledge in front of him and he's gonna be the dumb little student. Still, it's a punishment and I'm gonna get lord elrond for that one. Problem is, elrohir will not just give in to me. It's told all around rivendell that he's cold as ice and just as unrelenting as that. Great. Trying the sappy-tour on elladan? No way, I've got my pride.
So , what do I do now? I don't know, I suppose I'll just wait and see, probably it turns out fine. (Dream on.) Well, at least I will have to get out some really spiffing robes (mine are usually nice, but everybody is already used to that.) and look my best. (I do always look pretty good, but you know. If you don't, read the note above.) Okay, I'm not good at hair, skin and make-up matters, so I guess, it's time to walk by arwens beauty-parlor.
'You see, haldir, you were just behaving in an inappropriate way today ,' says lord elrond gravely. 'I know myself that elladan might not be the most charming person around but you got to him respect, just because he is my son.'
Hm? Did somebody say something ? I'm waking out of a deep stupor in a chair in front of elrond's frightening lawyer-like desk. Did he talk to me ? Freak, did he probably ask something ? Bloody hell, if he wouldn't have summarized my whole days-schedule up to now I wouldn't have started thinking about some ~naughty~ things I'd like to try with someone in the future and I'd know now what this is all about.
'I fully understand ,' I say, hoping it might pass as an answer.
'Good. But I still have to sentence you to some kind of compensation. Just to remind you not to offend my son again.'
Sorry, WHAT ? I must have dozed off, you can't be talking about me ! Hey, hey, it wasn't that bad ! I'm not a crimino-elf who needs to be sentenced ! To what, anyway ? Prison ? Torture ? Public beheading ? Eew, I'm feeling all woozy.
'You're going to teach Elladan and Elrohir your knowledge of archery .'
No way! Listen, big boss, no. I can't, I just can't be left alone with the two maggots wriggling about and around me all the time asking dumb questions until my brain oozes out my ears! My nerves are like french silk, you can't strain 'em.
'Did you hear me ?'
I notice that my mouth hangs open and my eyes became all glazed in shock.
'Yes . yes, I did. But . couldn't you think of something else. Pretty please ?'
'No. It has to be a punishment in the end. Even though I can't find something bad about spending some quality time with my sons.'
'No, of course, there's nothing bad, I'm just so clumsy when dealing with kids.'
Please, please, tell me, you don't want your sons in the hands of a clumsy kid-hating impatient maniac-archer from loriƩn! There's gotta be something else! Teaching them all ~I~ know will take a long, long time ! Well, I don't have to admit that I know more than everybody knows I know. So it might be only three weeks, a month. But a month with elladan .? On the other hand , with elrohir ? I could imagine spending some quality time with ~him~ . *wicked smile* (Note here : This is PG-rated, I am thinking of playing a nice board-game together.) And I know that he's elrond's favorite kid. What a sweet revenge on elrond for this humiliating punishment it would be if I'd seduce . uh, tempt elrohir to play some chess.
'Oh, well. Then, how about helping with the horses ?'
'No, no. I just reconsidered the matter. I would feel very honored to teach your sons the art of archery.'
Stunned silence. I didn't talk in a polite manner for a thousand years, I guess.
'All right, then. You can start tomorrow morning, at sunrise in the gardens. This would be all. You may leave.'
Thank you. But SUNRISE ??? I'm not a morning person and who can guarantee that I won't just kill elladan if he jerks about ? Another problem, I don't ~look~ good in the early morning hours, because I'm a night-owl. I am going to have shades under my eyes darker than any darkness in moria. Oh god!
The dinner in the evening is not as pleasant as usual, because elladan keeps glaring at me. Obviously my punishment doesn't suit him which makes me feel a lot better about it. I get to show off with my knowledge in front of him and he's gonna be the dumb little student. Still, it's a punishment and I'm gonna get lord elrond for that one. Problem is, elrohir will not just give in to me. It's told all around rivendell that he's cold as ice and just as unrelenting as that. Great. Trying the sappy-tour on elladan? No way, I've got my pride.
So , what do I do now? I don't know, I suppose I'll just wait and see, probably it turns out fine. (Dream on.) Well, at least I will have to get out some really spiffing robes (mine are usually nice, but everybody is already used to that.) and look my best. (I do always look pretty good, but you know. If you don't, read the note above.) Okay, I'm not good at hair, skin and make-up matters, so I guess, it's time to walk by arwens beauty-parlor.
